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RE: Opnions On Pro Domme's - 9/28/2006 8:21:56 AM

LadyEllen

Posts: 10931
Joined: 6/30/2006
From: Stourport-England
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Ebony - what you said about buying all this (expensive) stuff really struck a chord with me. If I were charging, then yes I'd buy and supply as part of the "firm's assets", and depreciate them and recover the cost in charges to the client, like in any business.

I've come across two males so far, (one here, one elsewhere) who seemed to think that I "should have" the stuff they wanted, or else should go out and buy it, without any contribution whatsoever from them. Needless to say, they were both confused and then disappeared when I appraised them of the situation as I saw it.

Lets face it, anyone interested in you, is going to be interested primarily in you, and not what equipment you might have for their delight. If he's only interested in what specialist furniture you have and how high your heels are, its probably time to forget him!

Would this sort of guy only marry a wife who comes with own kitchen utensils and bed I wonder?
E

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RE: Opnions On Pro Domme's - 9/28/2006 8:57:43 AM

EbonyFtshGoddess

Posts: 446
Joined: 1/1/2006
From: Hollywood Hills, CA
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quote:

Ebony - what you said about buying all this (expensive) stuff really struck a chord with me. If I were charging, then yes I'd buy and supply as part of the "firm's assets", and depreciate them and recover the cost in charges to the client, like in any business.

I've come across two males so far, (one here, one elsewhere) who seemed to think that I "should have" the stuff they wanted, or else should go out and buy it, without any contribution whatsoever from them. Needless to say, they were both confused and then disappeared when I appraised them of the situation as I saw it.

Lets face it, anyone interested in you, is going to be interested primarily in you, and not what equipment you might have for their delight. If he's only interested in what specialist furniture you have and how high your heels are, its probably time to forget him!

Would this sort of guy only marry a wife who comes with own kitchen utensils and bed I wonder?
E

if i were charging for my time, then it's a given that i should have all of the equipment. but seeing as i'm not, i don't see why i should foot the total bill if we BOTH want these things to make our experience more fun. let's face it.. beating someone's ass with a spatula wearing a mu mu get's real old, real fast.

on the flipside, some of the fetishes i engage in we need those sorts of things to make the scene more *realisitc* and sets the mood better.. for me at least. i know when i'm doing a med play scene, i want to have them on my gyno table. true, i could do it on a couch, but it just is more fun for me if i'm wearing a rubber nurse uniform with my slave strapped to my table. it's not necessary, but it sure makes things interesting.

i don't mind people asking what equipment i have or whatever.. but to DEMAND i have it is a totally different thing- especially since they aren't tributing for my time. some guys want pro quality sessions from lifestyle dommes. and that's fine if he's willing to contribute to her toy collection, wardrobe and gear. otherwise he either needs to take what he can get.. or go pay a pro.

< Message edited by EbonyFtshGoddess -- 9/28/2006 8:59:33 AM >

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RE: Opnions On Pro Domme's - 9/28/2006 9:00:52 AM

undergroundsea

Posts: 2400
Joined: 6/27/2004
From: Austin, TX
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyEllen
I've come across two males so far, (one here, one elsewhere) who seemed to think that I "should have" the stuff they wanted, or else should go out and buy it, without any contribution whatsoever from them.<snip>

Would this sort of guy only marry a wife who comes with own kitchen utensils and bed I wonder?

Dommes with dowry! What a concept! ;-)

Seriously, I have my own stuff both for ensured availability and, more so, for hygiene and health related issues.

Cheers,

Sea

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Post #: 143

RE: Opnions On Pro Domme's - 9/28/2006 9:17:51 AM

undergroundsea

Posts: 2400
Joined: 6/27/2004
From: Austin, TX
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quote:

ORIGINAL: MisPandora
The ethics of it is what really concerns me the most.

Thank you for the comment about my post. I agree with the concerns you describe. I began and left open a post in response to a comment about capitalizing on subs, which will share such thoughts and concerns.

Cheers,

Sea

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Post #: 144

RE: Opnions On Pro Domme's - 9/28/2006 10:39:38 AM

ToGiveDivine

Posts: 650
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quote:

ORIGINAL: BlkTallFullfig

quote:

ORIGINAL: ToGiveDivine

quote:

ORIGINAL: BlkTallFullfig
..., I'd have requested your derriere show up in RI pronto.

Hmmmm, either the only thing she likes about me is my butt, or she considers me a total ass ROFL
Not a total ass at all, and as for the judgement on your butt, shouldn't you send me a photo first? M

It's a 43 year old white male butt - not something to write home about LOL

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Post #: 145

RE: Opnions On Pro Domme's - 9/28/2006 11:00:17 AM

EbonyFtshGoddess

Posts: 446
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From: Hollywood Hills, CA
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undergroundsea

quote:

Seriously, I have my own stuff both for ensured availability and, more so, for hygiene and health related issues.

when i'm talking about gear i mean things that can hygenically be shared. like rubber sleep sacks, vac beds, a pillory etc.

not insertables or gags or even hoods. they're just expected to provide that themselves anyway. i don't use anything insertable on more than one person.

but things like a cage, my gyno table, the cock & ball pillory, sex swing, etc are all things that can be shared safely.

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Post #: 146

RE: Opnions On Pro Domme's - 9/28/2006 6:32:52 PM

undergroundsea

Posts: 2400
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From: Austin, TX
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quote:

ORIGINAL: EbonyFtshGoddess
when i'm talking about gear i mean things that can hygenically be shared. like rubber sleep sacks, vac beds, a pillory etc.

My gear to which my comment applies is pretty basic--various corporal toys. My very first flogging went on enough to break my skin. This experience led me to get my own toys and not have to worry about such matters.

Cheers,

Sea

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Post #: 147

RE: Opnions On Pro Domme's - 9/28/2006 7:14:37 PM

Zinja2007

Posts: 30
Joined: 9/20/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: BlkTallFullfig

quote:

ORIGINAL: michaelGA2
isn't a Pro-Domme really a submissive in Domme Clothing? i mean, they get paid by the sub, are handed a list of things that the sub wants and doesn't want and they pretty much follow that list. they, in essence, conform to the needs, wants and desires of the sub, thus making the sub the Dom and the Domme the sub? afterall, they are being diredted by the sub...aren't they?

So when I do things that are pleasing to my submissive (because I know it, or he's told me), I'm submitting to him? But since it's for free, it's okay and still domination??????? M

BlkTallFullfig, I get what you're saying and you're right.

What GA 2 said sounds absolutely ridiculous. "Conforming to the needs, wants and desires of the submissive" is not limited to pros - it happens between people in a non-professional realm as well. Doing things to your submissive you know he likes doesnt just happen between pros and their subs - it happens between any two individuals who playing in a scene.

Just becuz a person incorporates into a scene things the submissive likes, doesnt mean that person is submitting to the submissive. A scene, play, or whatever you choose to call it, involves an exchange of power- no doubt and when you incorporate your clients or lover's fetishes into the scene, that just makes you a better Domme!

I'm pro and I never have my little subbies tell me how to do a scene. Typically, just submitting to whatever it is I am in the mood for get them into subspace. But I will avow -I do like to get a sense of what their kinks are and I will, when in the mood, incorporate that into a scene.

Michael sounds bitter towards pros becuz he cant seem to find it for free and has to pick out someone to VENT his frustrations on. Or maybe he's jealous he can't earn a living doing what he loves to do. Whatever the reason, it's patent he doesn't like em.

SubSpace? Please, it's all about DomSpace!

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Post #: 148

RE: Opnions On Pro Domme's - 9/30/2006 4:21:03 AM

nikkicd10

Posts: 91
Joined: 8/23/2006
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What is an "opnions"?

Here is my 2 cents on the subject. I entered this lifestyle about 15 years, my first experience was with a Pro Domme, she was very upfront with me on limits and once she realized I had no idea about anything in this lifestyle, she allowed for a long period of time prior to our session to answer my naive questions. Thank God, I was lucky enough to find a real Pro Mistress and not some wannbe looking for fools to pay their expenses.

Since that experience, I have been active in the lifestyle. Today, I no longer serve Pro Dom's, however I have several as close friends and there is not enough money in the world you could pay me to take the risks they do. They are scorned in there private lives when they apply for loans, rent apartments, just basically try to live their life. They take risks everytime the see a new client, most of which lie about themselves in the pre-session phone interview.

As much as people complain about the price they charge, they never seem to understand the work it takes to prepare for a session or the costs involved in maintaing a dungeon and a line of fetish attire to please and attract clients.

I for one, have never paid any attention to those who claim to be a Pro Dom and feel the best way to create a client base is to degrade someone with out even knowing who they are.

Well, that is all for now and Thank you Mistress Leah Sheridian, where ever you are for introducing me into this lifestyle with a very positive experience.

nikki

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Post #: 149

RE: Opnions On Pro Domme's - 9/30/2006 7:31:19 AM

MisPandora

Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
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What a wonderful post, nikki -- thanks for sharing.

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RE: Opnions On Pro Domme's - 10/2/2006 3:20:47 AM

mons

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Joined: 11/16/2005
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greetings

i have nothings against anyone of you why should i ? i see you as someone who makes money it is what you wish to do and many man feel safe with you mainly too if they are married or not/ if it works for you and them ok who am i to jugde. but i hope the well wishes are extended to to us the other side of the domme world. why do you ask this question? i meant other pro dommes many are so nice and friendly they do not have this thing i show in a chat room once many of the man who came in the dommes were fightly like lions after meat it was something that i wish never to see again and i have not at least here on cm but i do wish you the best

mons

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Post #: 151