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RE: hard to find a (no fees) dominant female - 10/18/2006 12:29:24 PM   
MissyRane


Posts: 1032
Joined: 5/11/2005
Status: offline 		Just put up an advertisment in the daily newspaper "slave desperately looking for a no fee dominant female"

(in reply to Najakcharmer)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: hard to find a (no fees) dominant female - 10/18/2006 1:17:30 PM   
MistressDolly


Posts: 917
Joined: 8/24/2006
Status: offline 		Hi slavebarry,
 
It true, as others have pointed out, a lot has been written on this topic but  maybe you haven't dug much into past threads yet or maybe you just need  a little more advice...
 
Self-reflect.  Then self-reflect some more and recompose your profile- first and foremost.

Perhaps easier said then done, but relax about it.  Remember: finding a compatible match is hard in any lifestyle - not just here. 
 
Take it for what it is.
 
Don't let it consume you.  Loosen your grip.  If it happens- excellent, if not,  accept it for what it is and walk on.   At least you tried. 
 
Find something else to preoccupy yourself with.

Fondly,
Dolly    
 
heartfeltman posted sound advice.

(in reply to slavebarry)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: hard to find a (no fees) dominant female - 10/18/2006 1:19:56 PM   
DiannaVesta


Posts: 1087
Joined: 2/6/2006
From: Mid-Atlantic area
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MissyRane

Just put up an advertisment in the daily newspaper "slave desperately looking for a no fee dominant female"


lol- that's what I love about you Missy... straight and simple answer. I bet he'd actually get some bites!

As for the fee part.... well we've been down this road many times.

_____________________________



(in reply to MissyRane)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: hard to find a (no fees) dominant female - 10/18/2006 1:56:38 PM   
littlesarbonn


Posts: 1710
Joined: 12/3/2005
From: Stockton, California
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DiannaVesta

quote:

ORIGINAL: MissyRane

Just put up an advertisment in the daily newspaper "slave desperately looking for a no fee dominant female"


lol- that's what I love about you Missy... straight and simple answer. I bet he'd actually get some bites!

As for the fee part.... well we've been down this road many times.


That's why I actually chose to ignore the "fee" part of the conversation. It doesn't even seem like it's REALLY the issue in the first place, but because it is a loaded term, it drives responses automatically.


_____________________________

<---- FYI, this picture looks JUST like me


http://www.littlesarbonn.com/Stickman/Stickman.htm
The Adventures of Stickman and the Unemployed Lego Spaceman

(in reply to DiannaVesta)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: hard to find a (no fees) dominant female - 10/19/2006 6:01:42 AM   
DivaDuchess


Posts: 402
Joined: 8/17/2006
Status: offline 		Okay, okay ... I wasn't going to post to this query because of the BILLIONS of other threads that are so very much the same ... but ...

First off ... change your profile.  As a Domme, I have no interest in the poetry of your ... whatever.  I would, though, like to know what your hobbies are, interests (besides the whiny stuff), pasttimes, education, employment ... the list goes on and on.  WE get so many alledged slaves whining like cry babies or making grand demands, it's irritating.  Now, on top of that ... you want to get all the talent, time and attention, plus a roof over your head, food and such ... free.  Your profile doesn't even mention what you bring to the House you would serve.  What is your background as a slave?  Have you had any training?

Do you see my point?






_____________________________

Duchess

Courage is not the absence of Fear,
But rather the judgement that,
Something else is more important than Fear.

The Brave may not live forever,
But the Cautious do not live at all.

(in reply to littlesarbonn)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: hard to find a (no fees) dominant female - 10/19/2006 6:04:24 AM   
DivaDuchess


Posts: 402
Joined: 8/17/2006
Status: offline 		I don't charge (money) from the slave in my  home ... they pay with the services they provide.  But ... if you don't even tell Us what you would provide (besides the kissy foot thingy), why would We assume you are worth the attention?

Sorry ... needed to add that *lol*




_____________________________

Duchess

Courage is not the absence of Fear,
But rather the judgement that,
Something else is more important than Fear.

The Brave may not live forever,
But the Cautious do not live at all.

(in reply to DivaDuchess)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: hard to find a (no fees) dominant female - 10/19/2006 6:49:27 AM   
subfever


Posts: 2895
Joined: 5/22/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: UtopianRanger

quote:

ORIGINAL: slavebarry

please can anyone help as to why it is so difficult to meet a dominant female for a (no fees) relationship, it seems like after writing to nearly every dominant female on this site there is still very little to show for my efforts,whats wrong with females on here dont they want a slave. 


Here's a little twist of advice that differs from the others :  If you can't find what you seek here....grab yourself a vanilla girl to play with in the meantime - They are lots of fun. Don't give up on women just because you can't find one with a whip. - R



That's excellent advice. It also helps a malesub maintain a healthy self-esteem, which will do wonders for his overall attitude.

So the next time a Domme ignores his approach letter or rejects him, he'll be in a frame of mind to say to himself "Oh well... her loss... Next!" 

< Message edited by subfever -- 10/19/2006 6:51:16 AM >

(in reply to UtopianRanger)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: hard to find a (no fees) dominant female - 10/19/2006 7:28:13 AM   
cloudboy


Posts: 7306
Joined: 12/14/2005
Status: offline 		The key is in furnishing your prospective Domme a graphic, fully erect, close-up dick shot (picture) along with your introductory email.

As everyone knows, women are visually stimulated, so this introductory tack is very disarming and works quite well to seduce the targeted Domme.

This move also lets you remain more anonymous during the first steps of courtship, which means you can play your "winning-personality" cards later on down the line. (What woman could ever resist such a powerful combination?)

As you see, this is a win-win way into blissful slavery, service, and self-actualization.

< Message edited by cloudboy -- 10/19/2006 7:37:40 AM >

(in reply to slavebarry)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: hard to find a (no fees) dominant female - 10/19/2006 4:09:54 PM   
UtopianRanger


Posts: 3251
Status: offline 		A girl is a girl is a girl, my friend. {Speaking rhetorically } If you like girls, why miss out on the opportunity to enjoy one just because she doesn't fit a particular mold at a particular point in time. Vanilla women are absolutely wonderful!

I have lady friends here who tell me they talk to men all the time who don't like women unless they are dominant fetishists....and on top of that, they remain celibate until they find one - Isolation is indeed very unhealthy.



 - R


_____________________________

"If you are going to win any battle, you have to do one thing. You have to make the mind run the body. Never let the body tell the mind what to do... the body is never tired if the mind is not tired."

-General George S. Patton


(in reply to subfever)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: hard to find a (no fees) dominant female - 10/19/2006 4:55:18 PM   
demistress


Posts: 391
Joined: 4/24/2006
From: Dela-where?
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: UtopianRanger
...
I have lady friends here who tell me they talk to men all the time who don't like women unless they are dominant fetishists....and on top of that, they remain celibate until they find one - Isolation is indeed very unhealthy. 
- R


LOL YEA!!!! And THEN they're so damned backed up and horny, they try to hump your leg, and that's the end of it, back to celibacy for them.

_____________________________

Mistress Heather
www.niteflirt.com/MizzSpice

Wether you think you can, or you think you can't, you're right!

(in reply to UtopianRanger)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: hard to find a (no fees) dominant female - 10/19/2006 5:06:22 PM   
MySweetSubmssive


Posts: 1139
Joined: 2/7/2006
From: Lehigh Valley, PA
Status: offline 		I always wonder when reading a thread like this ... the OP puts his piteous plea out there, and there are many helpful/sarcastic/recycled/other responses, but there is no follow-up with the OP.  Have the comments fallen on deaf ears?  Has any change come about?

MSS

_____________________________

"Oh, James, you're such a cunning linguist."

--Miss Moneypenny

(in reply to demistress)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: hard to find a (no fees) dominant female - 10/19/2006 5:11:41 PM   
Lordandmaster


Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
Status: offline 		Sorry to have to say this, but maybe it's because you're a loser?  If you throw out the BDSM aspect, you're basically asking why it's hard to find a girlfriend without having to pay for one.  Other people find girlfriends.  So I'd say the first place to look is within yourself.

quote:

ORIGINAL: slavebarry

please can anyone help as to why it is so difficult to meet a dominant female for a (no fees) relationship, it seems like after writing to nearly every dominant female on this site there is still very little to show for my efforts,whats wrong with females on here dont they want a slave. 

(in reply to slavebarry)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: hard to find a (no fees) dominant female - 10/19/2006 5:54:23 PM   
DivaDuchess


Posts: 402
Joined: 8/17/2006
Status: offline 		This is just one of many posting where the OP just vanishes ... figures.

_____________________________

Duchess

Courage is not the absence of Fear,
But rather the judgement that,
Something else is more important than Fear.

The Brave may not live forever,
But the Cautious do not live at all.

(in reply to Lordandmaster)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: hard to find a (no fees) dominant female - 10/20/2006 3:51:18 PM   
Slipstreme


Posts: 817
Joined: 1/1/2006
Status: offline 		To the OP: If all you care about are your own fetishes, fantasies and the like, it is not surprising you can't find a Domme who will take you save for a Pro. Pros are the types that cater to you and build upon your fantasy, for a price, but most Dommes want subs who will cater to and serve them, which seems largely expected, what a submissive should want to do for their Domme. (though I'm not going into that argument, ask LA for those threads if you want em') If this is not what you want, then you aren't likely to find anything save from possibly a temporary play partner. At which point I suggest you talk to your friends. I have several play partners, all of whom are my friends, most of whom I knew long before I divulged that I was into BDSM. Good luck. 

_____________________________

Living the Dichotomy

Painslut? How about "Endorphin Junkie"?

For information about "the furry thing" please check out my profile journal entry for: 1/17/2006

Alpha of a leather family of four. Master to the slave z.

(in reply to Najakcharmer)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: hard to find a (no fees) dominant female - 10/20/2006 6:25:59 PM   
Arpig


Posts: 9930
Joined: 1/3/2006
From: Increasingly further from reality
Status: offline 		Ah barry, they do indeed want a slave...apparently they just don't want you to be that slave....take a good long hard look at yourself, the approachs you have used, your profile, and also examine the replies you recieved.
As a male sub you are selling in a buyer's market, so if they aren't buying what you are selling, then its time to change the marketing.

_____________________________

Big man! Pig Man!
Ha Ha...Charade you are!

Why do they leave out the letter b on "Garage Sale" signs?

CM's #1 All-Time Also-Ran


(in reply to slavebarry)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: hard to find a (no fees) dominant female - 10/20/2006 11:27:43 PM   
kc692


Posts: 3701
Joined: 3/24/2005
Status: offline 		Oh my, I haven't visited the forums in a few days, and there are 4 threads in "Ask a Mistress" alone whining,,,,,,scared to go look at the other topics....and after all, it is SO attractive to hear whining,......makes me want to personally email all the OP's and tell them what a wonderful impression they have made, especially to the ones that have more than one profile(this is not directed at any particular whiner) looks at those that are saying ....I'm a sub,I'm a dom, I'm a sub, I'm a dom, I just want to get laid...whoops did I say the last choice out loud???

_____________________________

Anyone can overpower; not many can INSPIRE.....

This is only MY opinion. If it's not yours, let's agree in advance to agree to disagree, OR, you can just get the fuck over what I had to say:)

(in reply to Arpig)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: hard to find a (no fees) dominant female - 10/21/2006 7:39:42 AM   
jthorne


Posts: 99
Joined: 10/18/2006
Status: offline 		I don't want a slave. I also don't want a sub that has your kind of attitude. At all. There is a marked difference between having pride in yourself and being egotistical. Rather than asking what is wrong with females, you should ask what is wrong with you that "nearly every dominant female on this site" is giving you the pass-over.

I am sure what you seek is out there, though. Good luck.

(in reply to slavebarry)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: hard to find a (no fees) dominant female - 10/22/2006 4:44:45 PM   
theRose4U


Posts: 3403
Joined: 8/22/2005
Status: offline 		Honestly the first thought a post like this gives me is wheew yet another me me me newbie that thinks it's all about his dick.

quote:

  it seems like after writing to nearly every dominant female on this site there is still very little to show for my efforts,whats wrong with females on here dont they want a slave. 


The same spam to every other girl won't get my attention, the boo hoo hoo I'm here why don't they want me won't make me interested, the bitching about why do I have to pay is less than appealing. What this tells me is that you have specific self centered fetishes and desires and still believe it's all about you. Pro's MIGHT put up with you for a little while but a change in approach and attitude is all that will get you ahead.

_____________________________

Finding a good sub is like sifting through trail mix. You find a few fruits, a lotta nuts and have to sift to get to the sweet and special ones
drama llama

(in reply to Najakcharmer)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: hard to find a (no fees) dominant female - 10/22/2006 7:51:50 PM   
dominalisa


Posts: 129
Status: offline 		slavebarry,

The whole "what's wrong with females on here" statement is horrible. Instead you should look at your profile. It doesn't stand out and doesn't tell anybody about you or what you can bring to a relationship and doesn't say if you're single and relocable or not. Also if you claim to be a slave then why in the world does your profile say you're also seeking submissive women?

Here's my question: Where are all the truly submissively, high quality male submissives?

Ms. Lisa

(in reply to theRose4U)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: hard to find a (no fees) dominant female - 10/22/2006 8:00:01 PM   
Morrigel


Posts: 492
Joined: 10/13/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: dominalisa

Here's my question: Where are all the truly submissively, high quality male submissives?


Good question.  I'm beginning to see what inspires so much bitterness and disgust in many of the more experienced domme posters here.  A lot of so-called "submissive men" here--judging solely by their hatefully misogynistic posts to this forum--seem to be defining themselves as "submissive" for very little reason.  Basically, although they have exactly the same values, attitude, and repulsive sense of entitlement as a standard loser fratboy-mentality vanilla man...they happen to be a whole lot smaller in physical stature, less impressively endowed, lazier and less creative in bed.

Clearly they were hoping that being "submissive" would mean they didn't have to be attractive to women in any other way.  That plan's not working out for them, and now they're sulky and turning nasty.  Quelle surprise.

--M

(in reply to dominalisa)
Profile   Post #: 40
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