RE: Do physically "hot" male subs get more action?

Join Our Community

Collarchat.com

Home Login Search

RE: Do physically "hot" male subs get more action?

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Do physically "hot" male subs get more action?

Page: << < prev 1 2 [3] 4 5 next > >>

Login

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: Do physically "hot" male subs get more ac... - 11/11/2006 12:15:36 PM

Posts: 140
Joined: 8/8/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: jamesthehumanrug

i would die for you ;IS THAT SHALLOW !?!

Nope...that's not shallow...that's just plain stupid!

You don't know me, and if you're telling me I'm "fabulous looking" just from the picture I have up here then you're full of BS! So...to say you would "die" for me is so bloody idiotic it's beyond words. So....any rejection you would get from me would be based on the fact I think you have a few screws loose or are just incredibly desperate....neither are attractive qualities.

(in reply to jamesthehumanrug)

RE: Do physically "hot" male subs get more ac... - 11/11/2006 12:33:30 PM

bignipples2share

Posts: 611
Joined: 4/19/2004
Status: offline

Fast reply:
I understand what James is saying here. Some people may choose to keep a distance from the 'beautiful' people, believing that everyone is looking at the hotty. After the beautiful person has made their selection, they're just there as second choice. Nobody chooses to be considered 'left-overs'. I know that it happens with-in the beautiful people themselves. Her boobs are perkier, he's got more hair, that person has the best complexion, he's got the most winning smile, she's totally lacking cellulite. It happens. Sometimes it just takes longer for people to see past the beautiful persons exterior and being such a threat, to the beauty that can be found inside.

~Big

(in reply to jamesthehumanrug)

RE: Do physically "hot" male subs get more ac... - 11/11/2006 12:39:34 PM

Posts: 1110
Joined: 6/22/2005
Status: offline

Pictures get more attention. It is just the way of it. When I had no picture, I got zero attention. I then had a not-so-flattering picture of myself, and that made a world of difference. Then I had a much better picture of myself and that made an even more profound difference. I never knew how 'intelligent' my posts were until people wrote to me to tell me so after I had my picture up! Oh, I know many of them were people who *DO* genuinely like my posts, some more were from people who believed they liked my posts, but probably only would've written to comment because I also had a picture up.

Well, I think if I had a photo, but didn't post at all ... I would've gotten a FEW messages, so it really has to be a combination. Isn't everyone looking for that combo of looks and brains? Heck, you don't really need looks or brains particularly - you just to show a willingness to communicate and have some sort of visual.

Anyway, it is just the way of it. And with a ratio of .... I don't know .... 100 males for every female on this site? The womenfolk certainly can pick and choose! Even more so considering the ratio of Dommes to male subs.

One thing I can say with certainty --- the wonderful beautiful women of CM like to use the message board more than men. The ratio on the message boards seems so much closer to 50/50. A smart man will let his personality shine through in his words on this message board (for good or for ill).

fergus

(in reply to MzTlaz)

RE: Do physically "hot" male subs get more ac... - 11/11/2006 12:42:08 PM

bignipples2share

Posts: 611
Joined: 4/19/2004
Status: offline

I kinda got the impression he meant, if he walked up to a beautiful mistress in genereal and said that.
Now I don't know if he meant he would litterally die for her or not, but my take on it was, he'd be all ga ga if he had the opportunity to be with her, a statment as someone would make unpon meeting up with some celebrity who he believes would be untouchable and he'd die for the chance to have lunch and conversation with. Don't know for sure, kinda hard to tell, but that was just my take on it.

~Big

(in reply to MzTlaz)

RE: Do physically "hot" male subs get more ac... - 11/11/2006 1:16:02 PM

CBTXX

Posts: 8
Joined: 12/3/2004
Status: offline

Just to chime in on the original question, as to whether the more attractive male submissives get more action than the less attractive specimens: I guess in the public sphere, yes, but not in my personal domain.

To me -- as far as kink -- enthusiasm, truthfulness, and endurance mean a lot more than a Nautilus sculpted six-pack. Of course, chemistry is important towards the romantic end of BDSM, and physical attractiveness is an important part of chemistry, but I find the mind and soul much sexier than the physique. For me, a man who is spread-eagled and gagged and waiting on my imagination, is about as sexy as a man can get…

(in reply to Sissypinky)

RE: Do physically "hot" male subs get more ac... - 11/11/2006 1:57:54 PM

bignipples2share

Posts: 611
Joined: 4/19/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dragonskiss72

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lorelei115

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dragonskiss72

For Me I like all sorts. Eye candy is all well and good but if they dont press My buttons that's all they will ever be. Give Me Grissom over Brad Pitt any day!
Oh btw I am VERY turned on by men in make-up, so long as it is done well - nothing worse than tango foundation

*Giggles madly* And I thought I was the only one who thought Grissom was the hottest thing on tv!

lol My hubby just offers Me crackers each time it comes on (as in I wouldn't kick him out of bed for eating them). I like quirky rather than pretty. pretty is all very good to look at but I like intelligence too. And humour. especially warped humour lol

I just use the crackers to help with the drooling

~Big

(in reply to Dragonskiss72)

RE: Do physically "hot" male subs get more ac... - 11/11/2006 2:07:48 PM

Posts: 140
Joined: 8/8/2006
Status: offline

The thing is I tend to be put off by anyone who would go all ga-ga over me just from how I look..I'm a whole person who looks for another whole person and the visual is just a component. We all have genetics that give us a base but it's what we do with that base....if you work out and take care of your skin, if you know what clothes look good on you, if you educate yourself, have good manners and learn to communicate well, are interested in many things and many people, are interested in giving something back to the world....these are the things that make someone attractive to me.

A person becomes more attractive even becomes "hot" to me as I get to know them if I like who they are as a person. I love intelligent people and I've said for a long time that intelligence has the same effect on me as tequila....makes people look a lot more attractive.

(in reply to bignipples2share)

RE: Do physically "hot" male subs get more ac... - 11/11/2006 5:22:45 PM

Posts: 1280
Joined: 2/11/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MzTlaz

I've said for a long time that intelligence has the same effect on me as tequila....makes people look a lot more attractive.

/me sends mztlaz some tequlia followed by a pic of himself :D

(in reply to MzTlaz)

RE: Do physically "hot" male subs get more ac... - 11/11/2006 8:09:53 PM

Aine

Posts: 820
Joined: 4/12/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MzTlaz

quote:

ORIGINAL: jamesthehumanrug

i would die for you ;IS THAT SHALLOW !?!

Nope...that's not shallow...that's just plain stupid!

You don't know me, and if you're telling me I'm "fabulous looking" just from the picture I have up here then you're full of BS! So...to say you would "die" for me is so bloody idiotic it's beyond words. So....any rejection you would get from me would be based on the fact I think you have a few screws loose or are just incredibly desperate....neither are attractive qualities.

You know what....I pretty much agree with MzT on this one.

Having never spoken to me, and having just seen me for the first time.....that kind of comment is so flamingly over the top and ridiculous that I would probably laugh out loud. Not in any way to humiliate that person, but on the base that it's just -that- obsurd.

Now, if someone were to come up to me and say that they had noticed me, considered me (insert compliment here).....

I would thank them. And probably go about my business unless they had anything else to say. And if it were -appropriate- and -courteous-, then I would engage in conversation with said person. Ask what it was that compelled them to spproach me, out of pure curiousness.

See...THIS is the way the subs should go about introducing themselves to people they want to approach. I think it would get them further and lessen the ridicule over their apparent desperation over meeting and finding someone they could be compatible with.

But hey, it's just my opinion.

_____________________________

Honey, you obviously missed the "want to be used as a toilet fetish" thread or "where do I get instructions on setting my sub on fire" thread. LOL

Thank you, DelRay for that one.

(in reply to MzTlaz)

RE: Do physically "hot" male subs get more ac... - 11/11/2006 8:53:39 PM

Posts: 917
Joined: 8/24/2006
Status: offline

Hi AAkasha,

Typically I don't approach male subs but if I were in want of one and I were at a party surrounded by available sub/slavemen, I would not focus my attention on a more attractive man any more than I would the rest. The only advantage a more attractive guy may have is that he may get noticed first. But that is the extent of it. Looks can only get someone so far.

(in reply to AAkasha)

RE: Do physically "hot" male subs get more ac... - 11/11/2006 9:05:59 PM

Posts: 185
Joined: 9/4/2006
Status: offline

i think this situation isn't just related to sub males and dominant women. i belive in all aspects of relationships whatever the bdsm and sexual orietnations they are there are an amount of people that will pick the ones that are more attractive physically first before they pick one that would be more devoted or real.

(in reply to Sissypinky)

RE: Do physically "hot" male subs get more ac... - 11/11/2006 9:13:43 PM

Posts: 8125
Joined: 1/19/2006
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline

OK MsTlaz
If you are a hot domme who can manage to get ALL the attention and not get the attitude that you are somehow better than those around you, then I offer my sincere apologies.
I have met one or two who were able to keep themselves grounded even though there were subs throwing themselves at their feet.
For me, though, when I was involved in the scene outwardly, the attitudes I got from those few smokin hot that were always getting the interest was less than inviting. Males and females would give tose of us who werent turning heads left and right the cold shoulder and brag about the subs they bagged afterwards. Not my cup of tea.
I dont necessarily fault the ones that catch the attitude for doing so, but I dont care to deal with it.

DV

_____________________________

I will be your Dominate if you will be my submit - Fox

Snarko Ergo Sum
If you cannot change your mind, how are you so sure you still have one? -proverb

*Owner of Fox - collared 10/13/07*
VampiresLair

(in reply to jamesthehumanrug)

RE: Do physically "hot" male subs get more ac... - 11/11/2006 9:16:41 PM

Posts: 180
Joined: 10/8/2006
Status: offline

Well you have chemestry and that is attractiveness, but who is to say what is attractive? We all have our turn ons. What is attractive to me may not be to you and vise versa. And then we also look at the whole person, who is behind that chemestry, that initial physical attraction, what are the brains, the personality, the character behind the chemestry because all of that has to fit too. It's really not all that simplisitic of gee the Domme's must only pick out the hot subs.

(in reply to jesskitty)

RE: Do physically "hot" male subs get more ac... - 11/11/2006 9:41:16 PM

Posts: 4900
Joined: 2/9/2006
Status: offline

I like an average looking guy myself. These hot studly types don't do anything for me really. I like a tall man with dark hair who's a bit on the beefy side, but most of all he has to have a great personality coupled with intelligence. If he doesn't have those, then he isn't my cup of tea.

~Lashra

_____________________________

“We can never judge the lives of others, because each person knows only their own pain and renunciation. It's one thing to feel that you are on the right path, but it's another to think that yours is the only path.”

(in reply to Sissypinky)

RE: Do physically "hot" male subs get more ac... - 11/11/2006 9:52:51 PM

Posts: 140
Joined: 8/8/2006
Status: offline

DV...I don't try to get ALL the attention...lol...when I go to an event it's to meet people and have a good time, not to be fauned over by people I don't know. I tend to see people as people first and their role is secondary because if I'm not going to interact with them on that level then their role doesn't come into play and I always try to show respect to everyone. As for subs throwing themselves at my feet....I hate that, I manage to trip and fall on my face well enough and need no help from grovelling subs ;)

I agree that the physical will get the first look..society programs us that way but I really do wish more people would look beyond the obvious.

I also don't think that everyone who classes as "hot" realizes that that's what people think becuase frequently people are too intimidated to approach them. I'm doing nursing training right now and my clinical group is myself, a 20 yr old female and a 22 yr old male. The girl is very pretty, definitely classes as "hot" and is one of the sweetest people I've ever met.... the men's heads turn, and she's completely oblivious of it. The young guy is totally smitten with her, talks to me about her all the time but is totally scared to approach her for fear of rejection. He's a good looking guy and I think, a good guy but his lack of confidence will be the thing that has him not getting the girl.

Sometimes the "hottest" people spend Saturday night alone because everyone thought they didn't have a chance. I think it's really important to take the time to get to know people...if I find myself making a judgement about someone without really knowing them I make a point of getting to know them...if only to see if I was right or wrong. I've been pleasantly surprised many times.

< Message edited by MzTlaz -- 11/11/2006 10:09:49 PM >

(in reply to DiurnalVampire)

Physical attractiveness - 11/11/2006 10:48:44 PM

Posts: 1553
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: New England
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: AAkasha

Male subs, do you feel that when you have to compete for the attention of femdoms that "more attractive" male subs (who may be players, jerks, have bad personalities or be bad news) get the lion's share of their time? With there being so many more male subs than femdoms, does it make it harder to stand out in a crowd? Have you found that at munches and in bdsm circles that femdoms will compete for the attention of 1 male sub who is new, novel, attractive and leave the other dozens of regulars and proven subs out in the cold?

Physically attractive humans will always be attractive to other humans; it is a biological reality of our species. Having said that, there is something doubly tragic about those who fulfill the beauty of the visual ideal, but sour it with ego, tastelessness or frivolity.

(in reply to AAkasha)

RE: Do physically "hot" male subs get more ac... - 11/11/2006 11:48:35 PM

Posts: 70
Joined: 10/13/2006
Status: offline

I'm probably one of gym freak pretty boy type, but I would see my looks as icing on the cake. Anyone who works out can have enough looks, but you need to have personality on top of that. Most of the plus that comes from looks anyway is that they show that someone has it in their personality to be dedicated to looking after themself (this is probably a factor in why footy players get girls).

To use some more examples from the vanilla world look at all the comedians/actors/anyone who needs personality for their job, that still get chased by girls even if they're middle-aged. Telling lies tends to derail things no matter how good looking you are.Chasing looks is a dead giveaway of inexperience in anyone, Domme, Sub or vanilla, male or female. Ayone who chases looks has probably never seen someone who was good-looking but had no personality.

Never really got the "cold shoulder" from other male Subs though, they tended to come to me for advice on scoring with Dommes. But even if you're just after girls you should still talk to the guys that are around, for the same reason that Subs are interested in a Domme's friends.

Subs by definition already understand the concept of being attracted to personality, meaning that they have an ability to develop personality in themselves in a way that vanilla guys don't. Unfortunately most Subs seem to stop talking to women when they're teenagers and they find themselves surrounded by vanilla girls who are only interested in sex. As a result of this most haven't reached their potential yet, so you should only be interested in what you have to offer, not statistics.

Cross-dressing seems to be a bit of a seperate scene, Dommes seem to either specialise in it or aren't interested.

All up all you need is a bare minimum of looks, that you can usually get just by taking care of yourself, above that it's personality,

Alex

(in reply to AAkasha)

RE: Do physically "hot" male subs get more ac... - 11/11/2006 11:51:37 PM

Aine

Posts: 820
Joined: 4/12/2005
Status: offline

I thought the football players got the girls because it was purely an image and popularity thing.

Or money if you want to talk pro.

_____________________________

Honey, you obviously missed the "want to be used as a toilet fetish" thread or "where do I get instructions on setting my sub on fire" thread. LOL

Thank you, DelRay for that one.

(in reply to AlexAussieSub)

RE: Do physically "hot" male subs get more ac... - 11/11/2006 11:53:53 PM

Mikal

Posts: 3673
Status: offline

What? Did someone say a sub was offering pro money??? lol

_____________________________

You know that I am a sexy penguin.

(in reply to Aine)

RE: Do physically "hot" male subs get more ac... - 11/12/2006 12:11:38 AM

Posts: 1710
Joined: 12/3/2005
From: Stockton, California
Status: offline

I really don't concern myself with these sorts of things. Or I try not to. If a woman is going to be more interested in the hot sub, then I say she should go for that, and I'm not going to do anything to get in the way of that. Sure, it means she's not going to be interested in me, but to be honest, I don't have a problem attracting women; I have a problem attracting the right woman.

These days I find myself surrounded by young, beautiful women all the time, but they're not what I'm looking for. I'm usually pretty sure I'm not right for them, mainly because we haven't made any connection that indicates that we'd be sociable on a bdsm type of level. I get really frustrating trying to filter through vanilla women to find the ones that are not really vanilla. So I find myself often searching for established dominant women (women who know already what they are). And it's difficult because they have their audiences already. So, I try to at least make myself known so that I might fall into the possibility of attracting one who is looking for someone like me, and hopefully she ends up being what I'm looking for as well. I'm getting older these days, so I find my search much more difficult, almost to the point where I feel focusing on my next MA degree and my next novel is much more productive than trying to find the right woman in my life. At least with education and my writing, I've been successful. I can't say that about finding the right person.

But it's usually not because of "hot" male subs getting more. It's more a case of people like me just being really tired of the quest so that we focus on more productive things.

_____________________________

<---- FYI, this picture looks JUST like me

http://www.littlesarbonn.com/Stickman/Stickman.htm
The Adventures of Stickman and the Unemployed Lego Spaceman

(in reply to Aine)

Page: << < prev 1 2 [3] 4 5 next > >>

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Do physically "hot" male subs get more action?

Page: << < prev 1 2 [3] 4 5 next > >>

Jump to:

New Messages	No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages	Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages	Locked w/o New Messages

Post New Thread

Reply to Message

Post New Poll

Submit Vote

Delete My Own Post

Delete My Own Thread

Rate Posts

Collarchat.com © 2024

Terms of Service

4.056