Collarchat.com

Join Our Community
Collarchat.com

Home  Login  Search 

RE: Lying.


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master >> RE: Lying. Page: <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4 5   next >   >>
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: Lying. - 11/12/2006 7:31:01 PM   
TemptingNviceSub


Posts: 3054
Joined: 10/1/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: slavejali

I don't think people should be too hard on heathers master. Maybe he is just using the internet as some kinda tool to embarress her or something. I know Master did that to me once via a post, he wasn't asking for advice on punishment though, but it was embaressing..and the point hit home to me (can't remember what it was over now).
The problem is however that in his attempt to embarass his sub/slave he has more than likely embarassed himself moreso......Tempting

(in reply to slavejali)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Lying. - 11/12/2006 7:31:23 PM   
arkansasheather


Posts: 18
Joined: 9/15/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: slavejali

I don't think people should be too hard on heathers master. Maybe he is just using the internet as some kinda tool to embarress her or something. I know Master did that to me once via a post, he wasn't asking for advice on punishment though, but it was embaressing..and the point hit home to me (can't remember what it was over now).


Master says "someone has a damn clue" and I agree

(in reply to slavejali)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Lying. - 11/12/2006 7:36:47 PM   
sweetnurseBBW


Posts: 2464
Joined: 1/26/2006
From: North Carolina
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TemptingNviceSub

quote:

ORIGINAL: slavejali

I don't think people should be too hard on heathers master. Maybe he is just using the internet as some kinda tool to embarress her or something. I know Master did that to me once via a post, he wasn't asking for advice on punishment though, but it was embaressing..and the point hit home to me (can't remember what it was over now).
The problem is however that in his attempt to embarass his sub/slave he has more than likely embarassed himself moreso......Tempting


Have to agree with that wholeheartedly. That could be why we are getting the lashing out by them also.

_____________________________

Sir Pain's pain slut

(in reply to TemptingNviceSub)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Lying. - 11/12/2006 7:38:34 PM   
stef


Posts: 10215
Joined: 1/26/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: arkansasheather

age really has nothing to do with it.

Since your 'master' can't seem to figure out just how old he is, that's probably a good thing.  He claims to be 27 in his profile, but in the introduction post he made last year, he says he's 23.  Was he lying then or is he lying now?

~stef

_____________________________

Welcome to PoliticSpace! If you came here expecting meaningful BDSM discussions, boy are you in the wrong place.

"Hypocrisy has consequences"

(in reply to arkansasheather)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Lying. - 11/12/2006 7:41:20 PM   
slavejali


Posts: 2918
Status: offline
You know heather..maybe the best suggestion was from smilezzz. You could even start a topic "The effects of lying or something"..I know I use the forum a lot to process thoughts and by including other people in what I'm thinking about, it gives me more to process.

_____________________________

Freedom in Bondage

Different Strokes for Different Folks

"I'll always have a *soft spot* for Sadists"

(in reply to sweetnurseBBW)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Lying. - 11/12/2006 7:43:02 PM   
Aileen68


Posts: 6091
Joined: 8/2/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: arkansasheather

quote:

ORIGINAL: slavejali

I just checked heathers profile, she is like 18, maybe her Master is young too..give em a break, thats what I think


age really has nothing to do with it.


Nope...you can be clueless at any age.

(in reply to arkansasheather)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Lying. - 11/12/2006 7:43:48 PM   
empresschaos


Posts: 84
Joined: 10/23/2005
Status: offline
 lol that's really funny, stef!  do as I say, not as I do... or is master to punish himself, too???
*note: I think it's silly, I'm not flaming anyone here. It just really made me giggle, what with the backfiring of making Heather post and all*

(in reply to stef)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Lying. - 11/12/2006 7:45:56 PM   
BitaTruble


Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: arkansasheather

Okay, well Master is making me post this. Okay well I lied to Him Friday night. He doesn't want to release me, but want ideas for punishment. Not into extreme. Well on top of this I'm being punished for fighting with Him, which He is whipping nightly for that. (Guess I should learn to behave)


Why did you lie to him? What purpose did it serve?

You confound the issue by fighting. Is this appropriate to your relationship? Look to your heart. What sort of submissive do you desire to be? What sort of service does he require of you that you feel that you can fight and lie?

Communication is so important and when you have a break down, well, you can see the consequences of that right in front of your eyes. Before any punishment will be effective to alter your behavior, first, the two of you need to sit down and discuss why the behavior happened in the first place otherwise what is the use of punishment at all?

I've bolded your own words to emphasis that you already 'know' what you need to do. You simply need to decide to do it. When it comes from within, it will be effective for you.

All this said, if you don't take it seriously, and lying is a serious business, there isn't a punishment in the world that is going to work on you.

Your Master has ordered you to put your shame out in public. Is that enough of a deterrent to prevent you from fighting and lying in the future? If the answer is yes, then no further punishment is needed because you have effectively altered the behavior already. If the answer is no, then putting it out for public consumption was ineffective as a means of punishment for you, so you've actually gained information from that as well.

What you choose to do with the new information you both have is up to you. You can use it to grow, or you can use it to hide the real problem you both face.

I wish you both well.

Celeste

_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."


(in reply to arkansasheather)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Lying. - 11/12/2006 7:47:20 PM   
MasterAF


Posts: 10
Joined: 6/13/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: stef

quote:

ORIGINAL: arkansasheather

age really has nothing to do with it.

Since your 'master' can't seem to figure out just how old he is, that's probably a good thing.  He claims to be 27 in his profile, but in the introduction post he made last year, he says he's 23.  Was he lying then or is he lying now?

~stef


Thanks For the Heads Up, Dont Have a Clue Why it said 27, I am Now 24, that Intro. Was Typed Last Yr, Before My B-day.

_____________________________

"The Greatest Things In Life Are The Things You Cannot Have"

(in reply to stef)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Lying. - 11/12/2006 7:48:34 PM   
BitaTruble


Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: stef

quote:

ORIGINAL: arkansasheather

age really has nothing to do with it.

Since your 'master' can't seem to figure out just how old he is, that's probably a good thing.  He claims to be 27 in his profile, but in the introduction post he made last year, he says he's 23.  Was he lying then or is he lying now?

~stef


Stef, you are a marvel. ::chuckles:: Wish I had read this before I made my post. I wouldn't have wasted my time. They have a lot more issues then 'her' lying it would seem.

Celeste

_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."


(in reply to stef)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Lying. - 11/12/2006 7:49:44 PM   
BDSM05478


Posts: 417
Joined: 10/27/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: stef

quote:

ORIGINAL: arkansasheather

age really has nothing to do with it.

Since your 'master' can't seem to figure out just how old he is, that's probably a good thing.  He claims to be 27 in his profile, but in the introduction post he made last year, he says he's 23.  Was he lying then or is he lying now?

~stef


damn stef, I'm impressed! did you remember from the bumbling of the introduction? or did you have to go and look?
 hehe

_____________________________

"It's a fool that looks for logic in the chambers of the human heart" U.E. McGill

"Never let the future disturb you. You will meet it, if you have to, with the same weapons of reason which today arm you against the present." - Marcus Aurelius

(in reply to stef)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Lying. - 11/12/2006 7:50:06 PM   
MagiksSlave


Posts: 2768
Joined: 9/11/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sweetnurseBBW

quote:

ORIGINAL: TemptingNviceSub

quote:

ORIGINAL: slavejali

I don't think people should be too hard on heathers master. Maybe he is just using the internet as some kinda tool to embarress her or something. I know Master did that to me once via a post, he wasn't asking for advice on punishment though, but it was embaressing..and the point hit home to me (can't remember what it was over now).
The problem is however that in his attempt to embarass his sub/slave he has more than likely embarassed himself moreso......Tempting


Have to agree with that wholeheartedly. That could be why we are getting the lashing out by them also.


Exactly.. I have seen many posts like this and have seen many people say... You want to embaress your sub as punishment so you are usieng us to punish her without our consent... leave us out of your personal life and your punishments!!!

I agree with some of that to a digree. I just do think he makes himself look bad by haveing her make such a post as well as make him look like an inefective Master because he cant controll his sub!!

Magik's slave

Edited because i cant type to save my life and these keys are deffinetly tooo close together

< Message edited by MagiksSlave -- 11/12/2006 7:53:56 PM >


_____________________________

If you’re going through hell keep on moving
don't slow down
if you’re scared dont show it
you might get out
before the devil even knows your there.


-Rodney Atkins-



(in reply to sweetnurseBBW)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Lying. - 11/12/2006 7:54:08 PM   
BDSM05478


Posts: 417
Joined: 10/27/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: arkansasheather

Well on top of this I'm being punished for fighting with Him, which He is whipping nightly for that. (Guess I should learn to behave)

I just have to ask this fighting with him you mention.... is it the same incident where you wouldn't sit when he told you to sit down and got the brusie? just being nosy sorry

_____________________________

"It's a fool that looks for logic in the chambers of the human heart" U.E. McGill

"Never let the future disturb you. You will meet it, if you have to, with the same weapons of reason which today arm you against the present." - Marcus Aurelius

(in reply to arkansasheather)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Lying. - 11/12/2006 7:57:45 PM   
Emperor1956


Posts: 2370
Joined: 11/7/2005
Status: offline
Welcome to the Sunday Night Follies, again.  Lets see...she was new to B/D/S/M and uncollared just 2 months ago...now she's collared, a "beta" in a full Gorean household, and wow...its been...59 days?   I'm surprised the Alpha isn't calling herself "Goddess", and He hasn't told us that he's from an Old Guard family of B/D/S/M for the past five generations.  And they haven't all been interviewed by some fringe magazine and boasted about it online.  But I digress.  All is great except they can't seem to keep their profiles honest or their log on IDs straight.  

And Aileen up there?   She's right.  Its like Ralph Nader said "Clueless at any speed".

E.



_____________________________

"When you wake up, Pooh," said Piglet, "what's the first thing you say?"
"What's for breakfast? What do you say, Piglet?"
"I say, I wonder what's going to happen exciting today?"
Pooh nodded thoughtfully.
"It's the same thing," he said.

(in reply to MagiksSlave)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Lying. - 11/12/2006 8:01:19 PM   
Celeste43


Posts: 3066
Joined: 2/4/2006
From: NYS
Status: offline
So why did you lie? If it's because you knew he'd go ballistic and out of control, then the punishment should be for him to take anger management classes.

If it's because you're afraid that if you don't do everything perfectly he'll leave you, then is the fear of abandonment coming from your past, in which case you need to do some work or is the fear coming from him threatening you with this repeatedly. If it's the latter, then the punishment ought to be you walking out on him.

See, without knowing why we don't know who is to blame or what needs to be done to prevent a recurrence. Punishing someone is easy but all too often it doesn't address the underlying issues.

(in reply to arkansasheather)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Lying. - 11/12/2006 8:08:46 PM   
stef


Posts: 10215
Joined: 1/26/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BDSM05478

damn stef, I'm impressed! did you remember from the bumbling of the introduction? or did you have to go and look?
 hehe

No, I had to look 

~stef

_____________________________

Welcome to PoliticSpace! If you came here expecting meaningful BDSM discussions, boy are you in the wrong place.

"Hypocrisy has consequences"

(in reply to BDSM05478)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Lying. - 11/12/2006 8:09:26 PM   
MagiksSlave


Posts: 2768
Joined: 9/11/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Celeste43

So why did you lie? If it's because you knew he'd go ballistic and out of control, then the punishment should be for him to take anger management classes.

If it's because you're afraid that if you don't do everything perfectly he'll leave you, then is the fear of abandonment coming from your past, in which case you need to do some work or is the fear coming from him threatening you with this repeatedly. If it's the latter, then the punishment ought to be you walking out on him.

See, without knowing why we don't know who is to blame or what needs to be done to prevent a recurrence. Punishing someone is easy but all too often it doesn't address the underlying issues.


That was extremly well said... they would do well to listen to you!

That is if they are interested in more then just getting attention here!!

Magik's slave

_____________________________

If you’re going through hell keep on moving
don't slow down
if you’re scared dont show it
you might get out
before the devil even knows your there.


-Rodney Atkins-



(in reply to Celeste43)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Lying. - 11/12/2006 8:12:12 PM   
Aileen68


Posts: 6091
Joined: 8/2/2005
Status: offline
I put my money on the slim chance that this and her bruised thread are all just a joke.  Just a bunch of young ones playing around on mommy's computer. 

(in reply to Emperor1956)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: Lying. - 11/12/2006 8:16:28 PM   
MagiksSlave


Posts: 2768
Joined: 9/11/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen68

I put my money on the slim chance that this and her bruised thread are all just a joke.  Just a bunch of young ones playing around on mommy's computer. 


yes this sounds about right to me... So isnt it about time someone sends them to bed??

Magik's slave

_____________________________

If you’re going through hell keep on moving
don't slow down
if you’re scared dont show it
you might get out
before the devil even knows your there.


-Rodney Atkins-



(in reply to Aileen68)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: Lying. - 11/12/2006 8:33:52 PM   
byule


Posts: 31
Joined: 11/1/2006
Status: offline
Greetings,

It seems to me you both need some training. There are Dominants that train but you need to be lucky enough to live near them. You also have to be very careful about what you want them to teach you. There are many who learn the most simplest of basics and then think they are quailified to teach others.

I would reconmend find a local Munch. You can google BDSM Munch and find pages of stuff or here are some high lights. What is a Munch?

http://www.drkdesyre.com/jaysguide.html

A list of Muches by State. http://www.darkheart.com/sceneusa.html

Attend some meetings and get to know some people. Many people have specialized skills or interests. Pick and chose what interests you and ask the individual which has that kill to show you their kink. Most are very willing to share what they have learned.

For a list of lifestyle books and books that are vanilla but come in handy check out the Ds Haven Book Store. http://www.dshaven.com/store/storefront.html

Have fun.

(in reply to arkansasheather)
Profile   Post #: 40
Page:   <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4 5   next >   >>
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master >> RE: Lying. Page: <<   < prev  1 [2] 3 4 5   next >   >>
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2024
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.094