RE: Random Stupidity (Full Version)

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RobertCloud -> RE: Random Stupidity (1/9/2007 12:49:35 AM)

The Surgeon General has determined that Sewing by hand can be hazardous to your health.
You are warned not to place the needle into your mouth at any time for you could puncture your tongue and expose yourself to all sorts of dangerous germs that are within the human mouth.
Thread is a dangerous item and should be banned because it could be used to cause loss of circulation to your fingers or even death if you accidentally wrap it around your neck and hang yourself from the ceiling by it.
Therefore as of January of 2007 all needles and thread are to be turned over to your health department for immediate disposal and for all clothing repair you will take it to your County Social Services where you will wait in line for up to 7 days to have the tiniest of rips repaired.
Thank you for your cooperation.




darchChylde -> RE: Random Stupidity (1/9/2007 12:54:22 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyEllen

Warning

Thread may contain nuts

E


Warning

Nuts may contain thread

note: the above message was purely original and not some lame ripoff of any lovely ladies with glasses that may or may not be the author of any of the previous posts which is entirely coincidental; and has nothing to do with the fact that i could not think of anything better, which i believe would be considered circumcizable evidence

-oren

poststrip: love ya lots-n-lots-n-lots-n-lots-n-lots-n-lots-n-lots-n-lots LadyEllen




RobertCloud -> RE: Random Stupidity (1/9/2007 1:03:46 AM)

Did darchChylde just volunteer to allow LadyEllen to circumcise him?




darchChylde -> RE: Random Stupidity (1/9/2007 1:13:39 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: RobertCloud

Did darchChylde just volunteer to allow LadyEllen to circumcise him?


eeeek, nope... i don't think i ever made that clear to Ma'am but that woulf fall under the category of hard limit... i don't mind a little knife play, but you know it's apples and oranges

as you probably know, i was just having some fun with transposing or interposing or just posing words; to go along with how silly and idiotic (pr maybe random and stupid) my disclaimer was

________________

4 out of 5 dentists agree that the other guy is a pedophile




RedSavageSlave -> RE: Random Stupidity (1/9/2007 2:06:10 AM)

I dunno...He sure is protesting a bit much..

I thought I read that as an offer to be circumcised as well..

The english language is such a delicate mac truck to be run over by.[8|]




katzschen -> RE: Random Stupidity (1/9/2007 6:28:25 AM)

Berry blue jello.




pinkkeith -> RE: Random Stupidity (1/9/2007 1:09:25 PM)

Taken from the Onion
 
Raped Environment Led Polluters On, Defense Attorneys Argue
 
OLYMPIA, WA—In their opening statement before jurors Monday, defense attorneys representing Pacific North Construction & Lumber Corp. argued that their client was not at fault for the July 1997 rape of 30,000 acres of virgin forest, claiming that the forest led the development company on with "an eager and blatant display of its rich, fertile bounty."



"While, obviously, it is extremely unfortunate that this forest was raped, it should have known better than to show off its lush greenery and tall, strong trees in the presence of my client if it didn't want anything to happen," said lead defense attorney Dennis Schickle, speaking before a courtroom packed with members of the media. "It's only natural for any red-blooded American developer to get ideas in its head when it's presented with that kind of untouched beauty."

"The bottom line is," Schickle continued, "if you're going to tease and encourage like that, openly flaunting your abundant natural resources, don't be surprised by the consequences."

Public opinion regarding the high-profile case, which is being closely watched by timber-industry lobbyists and victims' rights groups across the U.S., is deeply divided. While some contend that the forced ravaging of a piece of land until it is stripped bare is never justifiable under any circumstances, others say that such an action is understandable if the wooded area gives off mixed signals.


"The Pacific North Construction & Lumber Corp. had every reason to believe that that forest wanted it bad," said logger Victor Duffy of Chelan, WA. "Just look at where it was at the time of the incident: It was in a secluded, far-off place, nearly 25 miles from the nearest road. What were those trees doing in that kind of remote spot if they weren't looking for trouble?"

Those siding with the timber company also cite the forest's history, claiming that it has a reputation for being easily exploited.

"Believe me, this is no virgin forest," said Frank Abbate, owner of the Bellingham-based G&H Consolidated Timber. "It may try to pass itself off as pristine and untouched, but I know for a fact that it has a long history of allowing itself to be used by developers."
In his opening statement, defense attorney Schickle also pointed out that when Pacific North loggers arrived at the forest on the day in question, its floor was covered in alluring, fragrant flowers that were "clearly meant to attract."

"When a forest drapes itself in flora of every color and scent imaginable, it's obviously asking for it," Schickle said. "I'm sure the plaintiff will argue that these radiant flowers were meant to lure pollen-hungry bees, not pulp-hungry loggers. But how was my client supposed to know this? When was it made clear that this colorful display was meant to attract one particular species of fauna but no other? When was it made clear that this forest was looking to satisfy the needs of bees and bees only?"

Russell Belanger, president of the National Timber And Logging Association, agreed. "This forest made it seem like it wanted it, then cried environmental rape when it got it," he said. "At some point, we've got to start asking ourselves who the real victim is in these cases: our nation's promiscuous, manipulative forests, or the good, decent developers out there who are just trying to make an honest living razing the land."




katzschen -> RE: Random Stupidity (1/9/2007 3:34:01 PM)

Omobalasire.

If you can tell me where that comes from... Hehe, more cool points for you.




darchChylde -> RE: Random Stupidity (1/9/2007 7:13:15 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: katzschen

Omobalasire.

If you can tell me where that comes from... Hehe, more cool points for you.


a debut single from Prozzak

don't you wait it when a woman says you have a small penis, when in fact she has a hideously large vagina?




katzschen -> RE: Random Stupidity (1/9/2007 7:49:16 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: darchChylde

quote:

ORIGINAL: katzschen

Omobalasire.

If you can tell me where that comes from... Hehe, more cool points for you.


a debut single from Prozzak


Actually it's from Simon and Milo, off their CD called Ready Ready Set Go. But they're the same exact people so it counts. lol
As if you couldn't get any cooler in my book.




katzschen -> RE: Random Stupidity (1/9/2007 7:51:14 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: darchChylde

don't you wait it when a woman says you have a small penis, when in fact she has a hideously large vagina?


It's like waving a hot dog in a warm, moist hallway.




katzschen -> RE: Random Stupidity (1/10/2007 1:42:56 AM)

I need a hug. And someone to talk to. -sighs-




darchChylde -> RE: Random Stupidity (1/10/2007 2:06:42 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: katzschen

I need a hug. And someone to talk to. -sighs-


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-Tua Xiong




saphira1 -> RE: Random Stupidity (1/10/2007 6:10:29 AM)

WHY ARE DAYS SO LONG!




missturbation -> RE: Random Stupidity (1/10/2007 6:12:09 AM)

Because nights are short




saphira1 -> RE: Random Stupidity (1/10/2007 6:13:23 AM)

NIGHTS ARE NOT SHORT AT THE MOMENT U NINNI COS IT IS WINTER DOH !!!!!!!!




missturbation -> RE: Random Stupidity (1/10/2007 6:13:35 AM)

And ur skirts are usually even shorter [:)]




saphira1 -> RE: Random Stupidity (1/10/2007 6:15:02 AM)

I DO BE THINKING MISSTURBATION THAT  U ARE INDEED VERY RUDE I HAVE NOT WORN A SHORT SKIRT SINCE THE POLICE WOMANS OUTFIT !!!




saphira1 -> RE: Random Stupidity (1/10/2007 6:17:27 AM)

TURN THE VOLUME DOWN IT IS FAR TOO LOUD




Lorelei115 -> RE: Random Stupidity (1/10/2007 6:42:35 AM)

Tamaki: "Ah, princess, even if this world ends... I wish to be your knight, protecting you with all my life."

Suzuran: "Is that so? But isn't "To protect with my life" quite a selfish vow? Do you think the girl left behind would be happy?"

Hinagiku: "It can't be helped, Miss Suzuran. Men are lowly creatures, who value pride above all. They can't even protect themselves, and yet they believe women owe them something for it."

Tamaki: "That's a rather strict view. What kind of vow would you prefer?"

Benibara (Grand Entrance) : "Well I would... never leave her alone. If we fight, we fight together. If fate decrees, let's die in each other's arms. I swear never to leave your side, even after my final breath."




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