RE: handling slaves money? (Full Version)

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LuckyAlbatross -> RE: handling slaves money? (2/27/2007 5:53:37 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: fusion
What is the group think on handling the finances for a no limits, no rights slave?   Heard to bank her earning for her if there is a parting.  Read others are income earners for their msters, how they feel on the subject?  Any sent away slaves with input?

Whatever works for the relationship. 

http://www.collarchat.com/m_73308/mpage_1/key_money/tm.htm#73308
Where does money come into it?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_85402/mpage_1/key_money/tm.htm#85402
Money Matters

http://www.collarchat.com/m_86294/mpage_1/key_money/tm.htm#86294
The control of money

http://www.collarchat.com/m_140655/mpage_1/key_money/tm.htm#140655
Money and sexism in bdsm

http://www.collarchat.com/m_276420/mpage_1/key_money/tm.htm#276420
financial decisions

http://www.collarchat.com/m_472811/mpage_1/key_money/tm.htm#472811
In the beginning, money issues




justheather -> RE: handling slaves money? (2/27/2007 5:56:37 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: SilverShadows

The original post dealt with a no-holds barred slave. A submissive would be something else again which would have to be negotiated.


I just love this idea that submissives negotiate everything.
Where did that come from, anyway?

Not all doms are better at managing finances than their submissive parters, by the way. If it's a particular strength that happens to be held by the s-type partner, it serves the relationship well for that person to manage the finances, regardless of orientation.




SusanofO -> RE: handling slaves money? (2/27/2007 5:58:45 PM)

Good point, justheather.
 
- Susan




SilverShadows -> RE: handling slaves money? (2/27/2007 6:00:04 PM)

You have my complete agreement on that. Even in my "submissive" phase no one touched my money or assets. And anyone who wanted too would have gone on my predator suspect list.




azzmaster -> RE: handling slaves money? (2/27/2007 6:04:32 PM)

i say everything according to need and ability. many subs lack discipline and need help with budgeting and limits on spending. if a dom knows about investing he should invest the slaves money, but never exploit or live off the slave. I know there are people who do it, but to me it takes away from the beauty of the trust involved in D/s and is more like when my ancestors were enslaved and just got someone rich while they sweated in the fields




SilverShadows -> RE: handling slaves money? (2/27/2007 6:05:44 PM)

Different styles of Ds. It comes from years in intentional communities and poly relationships. In my HUMBLE opinion everything is negotiated whether it is acknowledged or not. But everyone knows lots of poly’s love rules and negotiation.




justheather -> RE: handling slaves money? (2/27/2007 6:07:30 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: SilverShadows

Different styles of Ds. It comes from years in intentional communities and poly relationships. In my HUMBLE opinion everything is negotiated whether it is acknowledged or not. But everyone knows lots of poly’s love rules and negotiation.


So, then, why the distinction between slave and sub based on negotiation, if, in fact, everything is negotiated?




SilverShadows -> RE: handling slaves money? (2/27/2007 6:18:17 PM)

Self identification.

Just a matter of degree. A slave negotiates away more. The reality is in Ds slavery a slave can walk away anytime they choose. I don't look for slaves; I look for people into servitude. They can opt for the level they want.

If they are looking for someone they can completely trust, then they can trust me to write a contract that spells out what I want and protects them. That makes me happy, knowing that people that sub to me are taken care of and are protected. That is as much as a silly piece of paper can protect them, since it has virtually not legal standing.




SusanofO -> RE: handling slaves money? (2/27/2007 6:21:35 PM)

Guess, I vote for (overall, on balance) being married before giving someone else complete and unfettered, all-out control over all money. That's my opinion. Maybe someone will come along and change it, but I doubt it. I am not referring here to a Dominant telling a submissive to pay their portion of the bills, or doling out $50 a week in "pin or spending money", or controlling "smaller amounts", or even turning over their pay-check to their Master (depending on if they have auto-deduct for investments forwaded to another account, and other things).

I am talking about things like co-signing house and car loans, and handling someone else's investments for them, having access to their bank accounts, and-or counting on them to plan your retirement nest-egg, etc. Decisions that have the potential for long-term consequences.

Reason: My sister is a divorce attorney. On the whole, I don't see M/s relationships as being that much different than "vanilla" realtionships when it comes to total screw-ups, bad judgments, and unforeseen endings. Marriage can be a huge risk, and in many ways, IMO, is no different from an all-out M/s relationship financially.

But marriage, IMO, overall, it can also afford (providing I'd trust a partner pretty much to begin with, which is a given, if I'd want to marry them in the first place) more protection if their partner does something completely wacko with the funds, or if they suddenly (or even slowly) "become a lot different than the partner I thought I knew and completely trusted."

Some might argue differently, but that is not according to the information to which I have been exposed. Again, this depends on many things, and I am speaking of myself, how I see my own circumstances, and what I would do, only. Each situation, I am sure, has its own nuances. Of course if someone has a pre-nuptial agreement, what they do if the relationship ends is spelled out in it. I am not sure if I would do this or not (have one of those).

I have heard (very infrequently) of people having "co-habiting agreements" that do hold up legally, but am pretty sure one would need to consult an attorney to draw one up properly, or find out when they have been most valuable in any court of law. Maybe they do exist, but I've not read much about them.

Yes, a "contract" (outside of a marriage contract) may well not hold up on court, and not be worth the paper it is written on. Any contract law attorneys out there?

- Susan




MasterFireMaam -> RE: handling slaves money? (2/27/2007 6:27:01 PM)

As much as I would like to have a kept slave, I simply cannot afford it. I require some contribution to the household account based on how much time they spend at the house, how much I'm feeding them, how many events we go to, etc. etc. After that, it's a matter of what kind of control is needed and agreed upon. I can function as a monitor or I can take total control. It's up what we agree upon.

Master Fire




justplainjava -> RE: handling slaves money? (2/27/2007 6:27:03 PM)

i have said this before do not get married bdsm and marriage do not go hand in hand trust and stay a slave if that is where you heart lies, 




SilverShadows -> RE: handling slaves money? (2/27/2007 6:30:25 PM)

Oh yes if you really want to know what I think the differance is go to the "What do the terms slave and submissive mean to you?"
 
For this thread I am using the definition the OP used at the start of the thread.




SusanofO -> RE: handling slaves money? (2/27/2007 6:30:57 PM)

justplainjava: There are married couples on this site who appear to be happy and who also (obviously) practice bdsm.

- Susan




BOUNTYHUNTER -> RE: handling slaves money? (2/27/2007 6:31:58 PM)

Theses days and times it take more then one income to make a quailty home,OURS work and contribute a share to the house hold fund and 50% is placed in an account  bearing their name ...You should only own as many as you can afford,I have heard of pregnate collared slave on the dole and masters taking that..bounty




justheather -> RE: handling slaves money? (2/27/2007 6:40:06 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: SilverShadows

Oh yes if you really want to know what I think the differance is go to the "What do the terms slave and submissive mean to you?"
 
For this thread I am using the definition the OP used at the start of the thread.


I have read the OP and gone back to read it again after I saw this post. I dont see anything resembling definition there.
This happens to just be a sticky point with me...the whole idea that slaves negotiate everything up front and submissives are constantly negotiating things... because i identify as a submissive and I have negotiated nothing from day one.
So... I wondered why it was that you made that distinction based on negotiation. I will read that thread, even though I was honestly avoiding it because I feared it was going to turn into the same argument represented here every four to six weeks on the subject.
Thanks for the link suggestion, will look into it.

*end hijack*




slavegirljoy -> RE: handling slaves money? (2/27/2007 6:49:39 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: fusion

What is the group think on handling the finances for a no limits, no rights slave?   Heard to bank her earning for her if there is a parting.  Read others are income earners for their msters, how they feel on the subject?  Any sent away slaves with input?


my Master doesn't take any of my money from me, except what i give Him for living expenses, since W/we live together.  He helps me manage my money.  i get direct deposit to my account and my Master doesn't have access to it.  He doesn't know my account numbers or pin numbers but, He does know how much i get each month and He sees my bills.  He looks at my expenses and my bills and tells me what to pay first and when to make changes in my accounts. 
 
He doesn't handle His slave's money.  He handles His slave.

slave joy
Owned property of Master David




SilverShadows -> RE: handling slaves money? (2/27/2007 6:52:28 PM)

OP's definition:
quote:

no limits, no rights




SusanofO -> RE: handling slaves money? (2/27/2007 6:54:20 PM)

If we are going with a definition of "no limits" equalling no rights, I've made my answer clear. But other people's may differ - and I am all for people doing what they want, and what fulfills their needs.

- Susan




MasterGremlin -> RE: handling slaves money? (2/27/2007 6:56:51 PM)

I am owned by my Master and therefore anything I have is His, including my paycheck.  I trust Him to do what is best for both of U/us, otherwise I would not have given myself to Him in the first place.

Cordially,
minxy [:)]




justheather -> RE: handling slaves money? (2/27/2007 7:06:14 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: SilverShadows

OP's definition:
quote:

no limits, no rights



That alludes to his definition of a slave.
I was questioning your distinction of slave vs submissive.
It was the submissive part I was interested in.
But, Ive read your thoughtful response in the thread you linked. Thank you.




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