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25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 6:12:07 AM

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D said He would marry me if i lost 25 lbs... granted, this would only peg me 5 lbs lighter than when i first met Him [my profile weight is not accurate, lol but was at the time] it would take me down to .... 120/119 [very reasonable i am only 5'4]

[and no it was not a joke or teasing on His behalf]

the ideal trophy slave should weigh 119 ha

D's out there: would you require something like this from your slave, before even formally proposing?

i dont mind, its a great motivation to finally get on that diet!

< Message edited by mixielicous -- 4/29/2007 7:11:29 AM >

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RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 6:18:47 AM

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He better be happy with you as a person too because looks are the first thing to go

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RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 6:19:50 AM

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I've been given orders to lose 20-25 pounds also. That would put me back at my high school weight. For me, I think having it come as an order makes it more do-able. It was a decision we both agreed on for aesthetics and more importantly, my health. Plus, I've been promised a full back tattoo when I lose the weight. Yay!

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RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 6:28:17 AM

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Aileen,

I would find it easier to do as an order too....however.

Unless you have been given the tools (or find the tools) to do it, it is a challenge. As one that has lost 130 pounds (so far, I have about 40 pounds to go), I find that the structure/discipline is the goal and the weight loss is a delightful benefit. If I focus on the weight loss, I sometimes get lost. I mean by this...if I adhere to the plan, structure, whatever tool I use, I can mark my progress even though I may not lose a pound that week. Besides, it is that structure/discipline that will be necessary to KEEP IT OFF down the road.

best!

...song...

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RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 6:31:42 AM

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I'm curious, is your D the right weight for his height or could he stand to lose weight also? Perhaps this is all about having the "trophy slave".

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RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 6:34:03 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: mixielicous

D said He would marry me if i lost 25 lbs... granted, this would only peg me 5 lbs lighter than when i first met Him [my profile weight is not accurate, lol but was at the time] it would take me down to .... 120/119 [very reasonable i am only 5'4]

now.. the debate is, is He being purely superficial, or giving Himself a time span to prepare ? lol

[and no it was not a joke or teasing on His behalf]

the ideal trophy slave should weigh 119 ha

D's out there: would you require something like this from your slave, before even formally proposing?

i dont mind, its a great motivation to finally get on that diet!

I would be highly offended and possibly end the relationship. Sounds extremely vain and shallow to me. If he loves you, your weight shouldn't matter. What happens if one day you develop some kind of health problem where you gain weight and can't lose it?

I can understand making a choice not to get involved with a heavy person if that's your preference...but using something like this as leverage with one to whom you're committed just sounds really chicken-sh*t. It would make me rethink the entire relationship.

ETA: I would definately say "F*ck off and go find the perfect trophy slave"..in the real word, the people we love/marry gain weight, lose weight, lose their hair, develop health problems, have surgeries which may change their appearance, go grey, get wrinkles, etc.

Whether your 100lbs or 200, you won't look much like a trophy slave when you're 80. He ought to be able to accept that.

I would also second the thought that his weight better be fricking PERFECT is he's going to ask the same of you.

It's one thing to say "I think you should try to eat healthier and exercise to benefit your health and appearance." It's quite another to place a demand like this on something as important as marriage.

< Message edited by GeekyGirl -- 4/29/2007 6:39:10 AM >

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RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 6:34:24 AM

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well in the health and safety forum i found this diet and i am going to use it since no matter how hard i work i cant get the initial poundage off [i am very physical day to day and it should be starting to show, but isnt!] and plan on following it up with regular either, gym or in home workouts.. i eat healthy already, its just that i seem to be stuck in this rut, lol!

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RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 6:36:19 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: GeekyGirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: mixielicous

D said He would marry me if i lost 25 lbs... granted, this would only peg me 5 lbs lighter than when i first met Him [my profile weight is not accurate, lol but was at the time] it would take me down to .... 120/119 [very reasonable i am only 5'4]

now.. the debate is, is He being purely superficial, or giving Himself a time span to prepare ? lol

[and no it was not a joke or teasing on His behalf]

the ideal trophy slave should weigh 119 ha

D's out there: would you require something like this from your slave, before even formally proposing?

i dont mind, its a great motivation to finally get on that diet!

I would be highly offended and possibly end the relationship. Sounds extremely vain and shallow to me. If he loves you, your weight shouldn't matter. What happens if one day you develop some kind of health problem where you gain weight and can't lose it?

I can understand making a choice not to get involved with a heavy person if that's your preference...but using something like this as leverage with one to whom you're committed just sounds really chicken-sh*t. It would make me rethink the entire relationship.

ha well this my infuriate you but i have known since day one being fat is grounds for termination [shrug]. so He claims. it doesnt bother me in the least, seeing as how, we will never really know till we get to that bridge. and considering i have been wanting to loose it for some time now maybe this is just the motivation i needed :)

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RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 6:37:43 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MsLadySue

I'm curious, is your D the right weight for his height or could he stand to lose weight also? Perhaps this is all about having the "trophy slave".

well he recently started a new job that keeps Him at a desk [since august] so He is a bit over weight too, not as much as i though. He also starts going to the gym this week [new building w/gym] and will be taking the diet with me

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RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 6:39:35 AM

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What happens if you loose it - he marries you - and you gain it back over 5 to 10 years and 3 kids later? i can see a dom encouraging his sub to loose weight because he cares for her, but to make it a requirement would make me feel i wasn't valued and loved for who i was. i don't want someone overly interested in the package to the point he'd break it off with me if i wasn't his perfect slave. What if you have an accident down the road and become crippled or get burned in a fire? What if one day you get cancer and have to have a masectomy? If he's so concerned about looks more then likely he'd leave you. i would want someone who has more depth to them then that - looks are important to a point, but who a person IS and the emotional/mental connection is far more important in the long run.

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RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 6:39:43 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MellowSir

He better be happy with you as a person too because looks are the first thing to go

lol i would be the first lady in my lineage to lose my looks with age, we have surprisingly strong beautiful celtic genetics!

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RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 6:39:49 AM

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Good luck mixie. I don't think it would provide me with motivation, but that's just me. I need the motivation to come from inside me.

(in reply to mixielicous)

RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 6:41:24 AM

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In my opinion mixielicious, which really means very little in the grand scheme of things, marriage should not be used as a reward or threat or incentive.

What he is saying is... he will not marry you. If the only thing that is holding him from that is 25 lbs... I, personally would not want to be married to that person.

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RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 6:42:51 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: mixielicous

well in the health and safety forum i found this diet and i am going to use it since no matter how hard i work i cant get the initial poundage off [i am very physical day to day and it should be starting to show, but isnt!] and plan on following it up with regular either, gym or in home workouts.. i eat healthy already, its just that i seem to be stuck in this rut, lol!

If you are eating well and exercising and not losing weight that indicates that you are at a healthy weight for your size.

We tend to *force* our bodies to be overly thin which is not how mother nature meant us to be. Every women who thinks "120lbs is perfect for me" is usually someone who would be healthiest at say 135. We tend to overestimate how thin we should be to "be healthy."

Personally, I just can't fathom loving someone so shallow. What if you develop a disease one day and get fat? There's lots of medical problems that cause weight.

Guess you'll be stuck like chuck cause it sounds like this loser will toss you out on your "fat" ass rather than love you enough to be with you forever.

_____________________________

"It's nothing that I understand, but when in your arms you have complete power over me. So be gentle if you please, 'cause your hands are in my hair, but my heart is in your teeth and it makes me want to make you near me always."

(in reply to mixielicous)

RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 6:42:57 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: velvetears

What happens if you loose it - he marries you - and you gain it back over 5 to 10 years and 3 kids later? i can see a dom encouraging his sub to loose weight because he cares for her, but to make it a requirement would make me feel i wasn't valued and loved for who i was. i don't want someone overly interested in the package to the point he'd break it off with me if i wasn't his perfect slave. What if you have an accident down the road and become crippled or get burned in a fire? What if one day you get cancer and have to have a masectomy? If he's so concerned about looks more then likely he'd leave you. i would want someone who has more depth to them then that - looks are important to a point, but who a person IS and the emotional/mental connection is far more important in the long run.

i can see what you mean. i think He has made it a requirement though, more to motivate me than anything. part of my goal though, as His slave is to be as aestheticaly desireable as possible, thats just part of what i offer Him. if i have 2 kids and gain weight guess what i am going to have to lose it, eventually. He is never unreasonable but it would be expected never to *let myself go* which is sort of what we are facing right now.

all those "what if" scenarios... although possible, not likely and i would prefer not to go down the what if road because it just makes a person worry some!

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RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 6:43:14 AM

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If he's doing it with you, and made his standards clear from the beginning ... this is quite likely just to get you motivated to lose the weight. From your postings, I'm guessing that you've been trying to lose weight already and have been unable to - so he orders you to do it, which gives you more/better motivation to find something that works.

Overall, I avoid people who have being too *insert whatever physical characteristic* as being a deal breaker. Physical characteristics are always subject to change, personality traits are far more lasting and more important. But if you knew his physical characteristic requirements and started going with him anyway, then his order is not out of line.

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RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 6:45:48 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: mixielicous

D said He would marry me if i lost 25 lbs... granted, this would only peg me 5 lbs lighter than when i first met Him [my profile weight is not accurate, lol but was at the time] it would take me down to .... 120/119 [very reasonable i am only 5'4]

now.. the debate is, is He being purely superficial, or giving Himself a time span to prepare ? lol

[and no it was not a joke or teasing on His behalf]

the ideal trophy slave should weigh 119 ha

D's out there: would you require something like this from your slave, before even formally proposing?

i dont mind, its a great motivation to finally get on that diet!

Does this mean he will divorce you when you gain it back?

think about it....

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RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 6:45:56 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: mixielicous

ha well this my infuriate you but i have known since day one being fat is grounds for termination [shrug]. so He claims. it doesnt bother me in the least, seeing as how, we will never really know till we get to that bridge. and considering i have been wanting to loose it for some time now maybe this is just the motivation i needed :)

Dear mixielicious,
I hope you take the time to think this through more thoroughly. Marriage is "for life" and if weight gain is "grounds for termination" then you're almost guaranteeing a divorce. A person's weight is variable through their life and there are many cases where it's not directly under their control. As geekygirl pointed out, you can gain a great deal of weight with certain illnesses or surgery (being given intravenous steroids after surgery is especially notorious for enormous and uncontrollable weight gain). I'm also suspecting that if a simple gain of 25 pounds is enough to prevent this marriage, the relationship may be better off kept as a non-committed one; thus giving you the option of being quickly and easily dismissed without the usual costs and red tape of a divorce.

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RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 6:45:57 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: mixielicous

D said He would marry me if i lost 25 lbs... granted, this would only peg me 5 lbs lighter than when i first met Him [my profile weight is not accurate, lol but was at the time] it would take me down to .... 120/119 [very reasonable i am only 5'4]

Does this mean after you get married you can put the weight back on without repercussion?

now.. the debate is, is He being purely superficial, or giving Himself a time span to prepare ? lol
[and no it was not a joke or teasing on His behalf]

If he needs time to wrap his mind around it, he sure doesn't have to use your weight as a place marker, all he has to do is say I want X amount of time to prepare myself to be a husband but during that time I want you to do X things to prepare yourself for being my wife. (For a woman that usually means losing weight so you can look DAMN GOOD in your dress)

the ideal trophy slave should weigh 119 ha

Depending on their height, If I were a slave, at 119 I would be all skeleton.

D's out there: would you require something like this from your slave, before even formally proposing?

No, but I would require mental and emotional preparation. If that includes minor body modification for health reasons, then yes.

i dont mind, its a great motivation to finally get on that diet!

You had the answer all along. Most of us usually do :)

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RE: 25 lbs? - 4/29/2007 6:46:05 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: GeekyGirl

quote:

ORIGINAL: mixielicous

well in the health and safety forum i found this diet and i am going to use it since no matter how hard i work i cant get the initial poundage off [i am very physical day to day and it should be starting to show, but isnt!] and plan on following it up with regular either, gym or in home workouts.. i eat healthy already, its just that i seem to be stuck in this rut, lol!

If you are eating well and exercising and not losing weight that indicates that you are at a healthy weight for your size.

We tend to *force* our bodies to be overly thin which is not how mother nature meant us to be. Every women who thinks "120lbs is perfect for me" is usually someone who would be healthiest at say 135. We tend to overestimate how thin we should be to "be healthy."

Personally, I just can't fathom loving someone so shallow. What if you develop a disease one day and get fat? There's lots of medical problems that cause weight.

Guess you'll be stuck like chuck cause it sounds like this loser will toss you out on your "fat" ass rather than love you enough to be with you forever.

first of all, i have been in a loving relationship and owned for over a year, you have no place to call my D a loser, ok?

secondly, i have the same expectations of Him

third, as someone who USED to WEIGH 119, i can tell you THAT is my ideal weight. these love handles and touching thighs need to go. i have never weighed this much & find my own body repulsive, is that enough reason from ME to lose it? i think so.

_____________________________

"lets just say he's a few prawns short of a galaxy"

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