RE: Surrendered Wives on "60 minutes" Austrailia

Join Our Community

Collarchat.com

Home Login Search

RE: Surrendered Wives on "60 minutes" Austrailia

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Alternative Lifestyles in the News >> RE: Surrendered Wives on "60 minutes" Austrailia

Page: << < prev 8 9 [10] 11 12 next > >>

Login

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: Surrendered Wives on "60 minutes" Austrailia - 6/29/2007 1:12:09 PM

Posts: 4294
Joined: 3/2/2007
From: Little Rock, AR
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Wildfleurs
I've seen worse child rearing in a supermarket parking lot

Amen to that!

quote:

And quite frankly I'd hate to see what trailer trash runt of the litters a TV show would pick out to represent the kink community, so I'm not sure I'd use a TV show as a barometer for this newfangled fad Surrendered Wives thing

Since I saw the clip, I ordered and received a copy of the book. This video clip made a mountain out of a molehill, frankly. The whole part with the last couple where she blindfolded herself and he chose her clothes and food at the restaurant was all part of a "no control date." That was a one-night experiment the author suggests to see how the wife responds to not having control over any of those things. She did it herself and was surprised at her own resistence to not being the one to have the final say in those matters.

The blindfolding thing was also an experiment the auther had conducted herself though she only closed her eyes. She wanted to see if she could keep from dictating to her husband just how to drive and which route to take. She couldn't, btw. I haven't read anything in the book thus far about brainwashing the kids, either. This clip was obviously done to inflame those who would start out disagreeing with the whole concept of a "surrendered wife." Seems it worked

.

Lastly, while I agree if they did a TV segment to represent the "kink community," they would probably do their best to show it in a horrible light as well, I'm not sure "trailer trash" would be the worst people could come off as. As someone who was raised in a trailer in a rural mountain area and has since lived in some trailer parks, I don't think I'm necessarily representative of the worst there is to offer......Proud Trailer "Trash" luci

_____________________________

To choose a good book, look in an inquisitor’s prohibited list. ~John Aikin

(in reply to Wildfleurs)

RE: Surrendered Wives on "60 minutes" Austrailia - 6/30/2007 1:04:30 AM

Posts: 97
Joined: 1/23/2006
Status: offline

Ok TammyJo my point is how do we really know what is right and wrong. Many people in here do not believe what the mom or father are doing is wrong. That teaching her about Male Supremacy is wrong. Its there family and really its not irrevocable. There are alot of men who live the mormon church, the sect of the mormom church that teaches poly. Yes the teen men are kicked out but they dont believe in it anymore. When I was young I was raised to be a christian and put through my head that god hates gays. Right now im an atheist and bisexual so it did not work. What about all the white supremacists leave white supremacy even though when they were young they were taught whites were better than any other race. So yes I am a Male Supremacist but that does not mean this child will not think differently later in life. Her father is not beating her, at least not that I know of. When im talking about irrevocable yes I mean mental but you can always get over that mostly. But physical there are some things that just really cross the line. Killing for one, beating to the face of death. Stuff like that. Who are we to say mentally what crosses the line. Yes there are many women who never get over it, and there are men who never get over the abuse of their wife or mother like Ed Gein even though it was also mentally ill. Im just saying we need to think more about what we find wrong and what crosses the line. Im not saying someone like this could be wrong but in this case from what I have heard is nothing wrong. I cant say what is right and wrong, you will have to make your own decision. And this is whether anything actually happened, if its different then what luci is saying happens in the book.

< Message edited by Mastermozilla -- 6/30/2007 1:06:46 AM >

_____________________________

TheNotSoExtremeMaleSupremacist

Learning more about the Gorean Lifestyle and hoping to become a part of The Scribe Caste. Working to become a writer.

Probably now going to be known as Mr. Controversial.

(in reply to thetammyjo)

RE: Surrendered Wives on "60 minutes" Austrailia - 6/30/2007 6:51:16 AM

Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline

Then I would say that you and slaveluci (and others who believe as you) have different ethical and moral codes than I do.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to Mastermozilla)

RE: Surrendered Wives on "60 minutes" Austrailia - 6/30/2007 11:52:28 PM

Posts: 2768
Joined: 9/11/2006
Status: offline

I can see how this could be controvercial, as these people are liveing a vanilla vertion of D/s out in the open where as most of us admitedly into BDSM are incuraged to hide it behind closed doors, but since these people arent putting themselvs under the BDSM umbrella they seem to be free to live this out in the open.. that will surely get them flack. But as it isnt "kink" they feel poerfectly ok to do so. The only real problem I have with what is going on is the involvment of the children. A little girl is under no obligation to "keep daddy happy" She didnt consent to this relationship and she shouldnt have to be subservient to any man if she doesnt wish to. The mother is consenting the children havent. In BDSM it is always very discuraged to involve children in this way, so why then if we can compare this so much to WIIWD that it is ok for them to do this. I dont think it is!!

Magik's slave

_____________________________

If you’re going through hell keep on moving
don't slow down
if you’re scared dont show it
you might get out
before the devil even knows your there.

-Rodney Atkins-

(in reply to AquaticSub)

RE: Surrendered Wives on "60 minutes" Austrailia - 6/30/2007 11:59:53 PM

Posts: 2768
Joined: 9/11/2006
Status: offline

Oh and the blind fold thing I could never do, not because I would dictate because will Im lost most of the time so I dont evern dictate to the driver how to drive, I have never been much of a back seat driver, my problem is I have a real anxiety issue with not beeing able to see the rode. I admit it is an errational fear bit I cant even close my eyes when someone els is driveing, I have this fear if IM not looking at the road we will crash. Though I only feel that way when Im in the front seat, its odd, but if I was blind folded I would have a complete panic attack!!

Magik's slave

_____________________________

If you’re going through hell keep on moving
don't slow down
if you’re scared dont show it
you might get out
before the devil even knows your there.

-Rodney Atkins-

(in reply to MagiksSlave)

RE: Surrendered Wives on "60 minutes" Austrailia - 7/5/2007 1:51:49 AM

Posts: 1
Joined: 6/18/2007
Status: offline

Interesting... I do think that part of this is a definite backlash to what I would say is some extreme feminists pushing way too hard on average women to be independent. Some women are stronger than others, some are very submissive. The same would go for men I would say. If it truly makes a woman (or man for that matter) to be submissive and defer to their partner, then I say go for it. Of course, I am partial being a Master and owning a slave (my wife actually) myself... but it works for us. There is almost always one partner stronger than the other, and I truly believe that when you look at successful relationships, the whole "50/50" idea does not apply at all. Rather, there is typically a more dominant and a more submissive partner. Everyone I know who is truly happy in their marriage after.. say... 25 years, and not just "putting up with" their partner has an aspect of D/s in their relationship.

(in reply to slaveluci)

RE: Surrendered Wives on "60 minutes" Austrailia - 7/5/2007 2:22:47 PM

Posts: 6334
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Domme Emeritus
Status: offline

I finally watched the video. All I saw were the fresh young faces and wondered where the older females were. Then I remembered “Lois”.

“Lois” and I have been friends for over 20 years. “Lois” is 63. She got married at 17 to her high school sweetheart and they were married for over 40 years.

I recall visiting with her one afternoon when her husband, who was self employed, and had been home on the computer all day, interrupted out conversation to request that she make him a grilled cheese sandwich. She was a bit flustered/embarrassed by him but she complied. She had two sons (young adults) living at home, at the time, also who treated her the same way. “Lois” never worked outside the home. This was her life.

A few years ago, she called me to tell me her husband died suddenly of a heart attack. He took care of all the household finances. She was trying to sort through all the paperwork left behind, trying to make sense of it all. His idea of insurance was buying several tv-ad policies that didn’t cover expenses she needed at this time. He was an entrepreneur that would invest and find that the ‘sure thing’ didn’t pan out. She found out just how bad their finances were the collectors came calling.

There is a benefit of working as a team, discussing things, sharing ideas and opinions.
Her sons have difficulty in finding lasting relationships because of this example they grew up with.

What to know the saddest thing? When her husband died, she didn’t miss him all that much and there wasn’t that many “warm” memories.

I treat my husband well. I do things for him that I know he enjoys. When he comes home at night, I greet him with a hug and a kiss. I don’t chat his ear off. He grabs a beer and a Lazy-boy comfy chair J I sit with him while he decompresses from the day’s work. I used to have supper ready, but he doesn’t want to eat when he hits the door, so I make sure we have munchies. (summer sausage, cheese and crackers), then if the spirit compels us, we eat later or simply go out. I keep the house neat because that is how we like it.. me more than he. I’m a neat freak. I don’t micro-mange him and he doesn’t micro-manage me.

Before you think any lifestyle is the ANSWER, consider what lies ahead. You won’t always be young. You won‘t always be able bodied. You need your friends. Everyone here seems so big on “thinking outside the box”- think things through as if they are going to last. Life isn’t a game. Most of you have needs you haven’t even thought of yet.

Laying your life in the hands of another to orchestrate doubles their burden. They have to run their life as WELL as yours.

_____________________________

Life Lesson #1

I'm not your type.
I'm not inflatable.

(in reply to DedicatedDom40)

RE: Surrendered Wives on "60 minutes" Austrailia - 7/5/2007 3:40:44 PM

Posts: 2933
Joined: 6/19/2006
Status: offline

Why would you assume that just because the wife makes her hub HoH and caters to him that this negates any knowledge or ability to take care of finances if he dies before her?

_____________________________

Religion is for people who are scared of hell, Spirituality is for people who have been there

(in reply to LotusSong)

RE: Surrendered Wives on "60 minutes" Austrailia - 7/5/2007 3:51:28 PM

Posts: 6334
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Domme Emeritus
Status: offline

When you live long enough and see it happen often enough... you know (I don't assume)

You have focused on one sentence of my post- there was so much more,

To blindly have one person do something exclusively that will ultimately effect your well being and have no idea what that might be because he is HoH instead of discussing it all and working together- results exactly in what happened in my post. Who is the female supposed to rely on after her HoH is gone? I say, trust in Hoh.. but row for shore. Have a plan B to protect yourself in adversity is all.

_____________________________

Life Lesson #1

I'm not your type.
I'm not inflatable.

(in reply to velvetears)

RE: Surrendered Wives on "60 minutes" Austrailia - 7/5/2007 4:18:54 PM

Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline

It goes the other way to.

What happens if the wives in these families die? Who will cook? Take care of the house? Laundry? All those other things?

It isn't just people like those in the video, it's anyone who allows only one person to know everything about something going on in THEIR life.

I'm not fond of computers but I'd be a complete fool to fully rely on Tom. Tom hates to cook but he'd be a total fool to not know the basics.

The same thing with my slave. I will never allow myself to become dependent on my slave nor will I allow him/her to become dependent on me.

Any single one of us could die tomorrow. Each of us needs to be certain we can take care of ourselves. Play into our strengths and our desires now, sure, things are happier that way, but every now and then we force each other to do something just to prove to each other we still can.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to LotusSong)

RE: Surrendered Wives on "60 minutes" Austrailia - 7/5/2007 5:38:27 PM

SilkFreudianSlip

Posts: 2
Joined: 6/8/2007
Status: offline

Hmm... I could not get the clip to go but I did read the transcript. I do not that that sort of relationship would work for me. It may work for other women, but I'd get fed up too soon. I would prefer to do these things by my own choice and not because it was expected of me.

(in reply to slaveluci)

RE: Surrendered Wives on "60 minutes" Austrailia - 7/6/2007 9:01:36 AM

Posts: 1712
Joined: 6/24/2005
From: DC Metro area
Status: offline

LotusSong, some people happily accept this "double burden", in fact, they would tell you themselves that they do not see it as a burden at all, but rather a blessing. it's all in how you're wired. for my Master, being in an equal-authority and control relationship would be a burden and a misery, because he would be stifled and unable to thrive.

as for the Surrendered Wives, who knows their exact situations...i'm sure it varies from couple to couple just as in any other lifestyle. perhaps a good deal of these women are perfectly capable of surviving should something happen to their Husbands, and perhaps their Husbands are perfectly capable of taking care of hearth home and children should something happen to their wives. i saw nothing in the clip to suggest otherwise. but if they do not, if one would be lost without the other, this to me is not necessarily a tragedy. everyone cannot do everything. we are not all wired to ride both sides of the fence. when one comes to an understanding about themselves, that this is where their strengths and passions lie, and this is where the weaknesses can be found...it's just a matter of conducting oneself accordingly from there, getting by as best you can.

(in reply to SilkFreudianSlip)

RE: Surrendered Wives on "60 minutes" Austrailia - 7/6/2007 10:44:50 AM

Posts: 2652
Joined: 10/31/2006
From: Portland, Me via Las Vegas Nv
Status: offline

my biggest problem with this whole 'surrender' situation is that man has the final say on the finances. HA! if i had left the finance to my soon to be ex husband we would both be up to our eyes in debt. When he got paid it was always oohh i want this game or ooooo i want this or that. I had to DRILL it into his head that needs come first wants come second hell i had to teach him to budget. i am sorry but when you are in a relationship and personal finances are invovled unless the other person is completely bat shit sutpid when it comes to money BOTH parties should have an equal final say in things.

As for surrendering to my next husband...my bf would drop me liek a bad habit. Why? because he wants someone who sticks up for herself makes her own decisions and has the balls to call him out when he's wrong. Do I nag? on occasiona when it is needed to get through their thick skulls the point at hand.

I don't know if it got mentioned since i skipped a few pages but did anyone ever see the Law and Order episode that delt with surrendered wives? They made the author a man and his shining example was his son and daughter in law whom he introduced. The DIL was also a former paitent of his. long story short the DIL finally got tired of letting her husband run her life and planned to leave him. Wanna guess what happend to her?

(in reply to kittinSol)

RE: Surrendered Wives on "60 minutes" Austrailia - 7/8/2007 11:42:04 PM

Posts: 213
Joined: 3/17/2007
Status: offline

Wait a minute here folks , Is this not just exactly what a TPE is ??.. In order for a 24/ 7 Total power exhange that I hear so many claim to seek from this lifestyle, then well one has to surrender and give up power right ? If Not then there is NO Ds life... as far as consentual slavery , Yes that is what this is basicaly, but again no one is holding a gun to anyones head are they ?? .. and as far as the kids go , I dont see trying to instill those values into another , that is their choice.The honor and respect I do agree with from a child.. .

(in reply to slaveluci)

RE: Surrendered Wives on "60 minutes" Austrailia - 7/9/2007 6:38:15 AM

Posts: 4206
Joined: 10/8/2005
Status: offline

-fast reply-

Simply Amazing................................(and no, not the show on 60 Minutes)

Bull

_____________________________

Live well,

Bull

I'm not an asshole; I'm simply resolute...

"A Republic, If You Can Keep It."

Caution: My humor is a bit skewed.

(in reply to HardnRuff)

RE: Surrendered Wives on "60 minutes" Austrailia - 7/9/2007 2:11:24 PM

Posts: 213
Joined: 3/17/2007
Status: offline

I rather liked the video here .. Its a Ds relationship in its truest form...

(in reply to slaveluci)

RE: Surrendered Wives on "60 minutes" Austrailia - 7/9/2007 3:08:15 PM

Posts: 118
Joined: 6/19/2007
Status: offline

While I do think everyone has a right to their opinion, I like the whole idea. It's pretty much how we live anyway, and it's what I have wanted my whole life, though I didn't know it had a name. I plan on going out to get the book at the end of the week and applying it to making Master a better slave/wife.

I want to do anything I can to please him, so hopefully this will give me more ideas on that.

Would I raise my child this way? I really don't know. I will raise her to respect her father, but me also. I will teach them to treat everyone with love and caring. They will learn discipline, but know that they are loved regardless of where life leads them. I have no problem with my daughter knowing that he is the head of the home and that I take care of him and my family. I feel it's my place as his wife and as her mother to allow her to see that there is a such thing as a happy, loving, stable marriage in this day and age. What she does with that..be she gay, straight, dom, or sub.. is up to her. I have no doubt she will have the intelligence to follow her own path, and the wings we have given her will only help.

_____________________________

And in that moment, everything I knew to be true about myself up until then was gone. I was acting like another woman, yet I was more myself than ever before. ~F

To hell with diamonds, lube is a girls best friend ;)

(in reply to kittinSol)

RE: Surrendered Wives on "60 minutes" Austrailia - 7/9/2007 4:09:37 PM

Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: HardnRuff

I rather liked the video here .. Its a Ds relationship in its truest form...

I'm personally quite uncomfortable with labeling other relationships as Ds or part of BDSM. I think that label best comes from those involved in that relationship. My guess is that these couples might be horrified to think that what they are doing is anything close to BDSM or SM or Ds.

Most vanillas in my experience really dislike any attempt to see what we all do in their lives. We might consider them ignorant but I believe in their right to define their own adult relationships.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to HardnRuff)

RE: Surrendered Wives on "60 minutes" Austrailia - 7/13/2007 7:21:58 AM

Posts: 276
Joined: 7/15/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: thetammyjo

quote:

ORIGINAL: HardnRuff

I rather liked the video here .. Its a Ds relationship in its truest form...

I'm personally quite uncomfortable with labeling other relationships as Ds or part of BDSM. I think that label best comes from those involved in that relationship. My guess is that these couples might be horrified to think that what they are doing is anything close to BDSM or SM or Ds.

Most vanillas in my experience really dislike any attempt to see what we all do in their lives. We might consider them ignorant but I believe in their right to define their own adult relationships.

I think your way off base here.......on several levels...this by essense is TPE....if they didn't want to admit that one person was in total charge, HOH - head of household, or that the one blindfold picking clothes wasn't a particular fetish date, I don't know what is.....if your blindfolding someone and picking out their clothes, telling them if you like their lip stick, etc, that sounds like a certain level of power exchange...now whether they continue it or not, is totally irrelevant...

the labels aren't important...I agree with you on that front, if they enjoy a TPE but don't want to admit it, it doesn't really matter....

(in reply to thetammyjo)

RE: Surrendered Wives on "60 minutes" Austrailia - 7/13/2007 7:38:54 AM

Posts: 276
Joined: 7/15/2004
Status: offline

I really should get this book, although its pretty simple concept in a nut shell....

anyone I'd consider dating would be required to read this book or I wouldn't even consider dating them....or at least understand the concepts behind them...

I basically expect things a certain way, I'm somewhat lenient, but if its not done my way on specific things, its the highway for the lady....

Then again I do not like doormats, so I want a woman who I can be lenient with and not have to explain everything, or if I want to have an intelligent convo with, can partake in that endevor...

(in reply to wwwkevinww)

Page: << < prev 8 9 [10] 11 12 next > >>

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Alternative Lifestyles in the News >> RE: Surrendered Wives on "60 minutes" Austrailia

Page: << < prev 8 9 [10] 11 12 next > >>

Jump to:

New Messages	No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages	Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages	Locked w/o New Messages

Post New Thread

Reply to Message

Post New Poll

Submit Vote

Delete My Own Post

Delete My Own Thread

Rate Posts

Collarchat.com © 2024

Terms of Service

0.156