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This is very important to new users - 10/2/2007 12:16:47 PM   
stpaulslaveuser


Posts: 5
Joined: 4/12/2006
Status: offline
Old fashioned values Vs being a submissive.

Ok, finding a guy, and doing the kind of sex HE likes doing so long as your in the mood, doesn't make you a submissive or even kinky. It makes you an old fashioned wife/breeding cow like you your boring grandma.


"submitting" yourself to some one, or any one, or to the general public, what ever the case my be, is a gift of yourself, to the person or persons you are submitting yourself to.

At the core of the idea you are basically saying "I am yours to do to whatever you wish, whenever you wish, or nothing at all, with no regard to my opinion of weather or not I like it."

I don't think you have to automatically submit. There can and sometimes is a power struggle. The loser of this struggle usually submits.

If you like to be in situations where you have no control, but don't want to freely give it ever. That's not submission. It's an entirely different fetish, where as you become bound to fulfill your captors wishes either through being bound, or the inability to fight back as a result of pain, or fear. This is called BDSM.

Learn the damn difference.
Liking rough sex doesn't automatically make you submissive.
It doesn't make for good BDSM either.
Neither does getting it up the ass.
Or sucking cock,
or liking it when some one spanks you. These are only fetishes.

You ALL will have much more fun at these things of you know the basic differences. And you won't find yourselves in situations where you don't want to be.
Yes, being a sub means you usually have more than one fetish.
Yes you can be into BDSM and be a sub at the same time. Yes All of these things can and do mix.

Everyone thinks it's easy being a DOM.
I am here to say it's NOT! It's the lead role in role playing or real life and it's very hard!
Every time you find someone new you have to find out what they need, because almost none of them know what they want, or even like. They just think they do.
Also "Slaves" are something entirely different. A slave is someone who embraces the idea of ownership. Someone who thinks of themselves as an object. Either through fear, brainwashing, or who just thinks that way.
A slaves purpose is to reflect the fetishes of whoever claims ownership.
I think wearing a collar reflects this kind of scenario far more than someone just wanting to be handcuffed and spanked by their new lover so they can call themselves kinky or submissive.
Don't come to a kinky website and post a profile and claim you know what your doing unless you do. You will just look stupid. If all you want 9 out of 10 times is to get a sperm reload in your kid popper. And then be mildly kinky the other 1 out of 10 times you get naked in the dark. Go back an post your profile on yahoo personals or friendfinder or something and leave the rest of us harmless professional perverts alone.
stpaulslaveuser
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: This is very important to new users - 10/2/2007 12:23:23 PM   
LordVelvet


Posts: 311
Joined: 4/25/2006
Status: offline
Oh boy.......Goes and gets marshmallows and waits for the roast to begin.

LordVelvet

< Message edited by LordVelvet -- 10/2/2007 12:41:14 PM >

(in reply to stpaulslaveuser)
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RE: This is very important to new users - 10/2/2007 12:32:52 PM   
CutieMouse


Posts: 81
Status: offline
I'm afraid you lost me at the "submission is a gift" statements, as I don't believe it is (although I do ID as submissive)... I will agree that the responsibilities of being dominant aren't exactly a stroll in the park, though.

(in reply to LordVelvet)
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RE: This is very important to new users - 10/2/2007 12:33:52 PM   
celticlord2112


Posts: 5732
Status: offline
Did anybody remember the popcorn?

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RE: This is very important to new users - 10/2/2007 12:35:48 PM   
BOUNTYHUNTER


Posts: 9259
Joined: 2/5/2004
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Yawns...

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US going to hell in a hand basket/

(in reply to celticlord2112)
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RE: This is very important to new users - 10/2/2007 12:35:57 PM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline
This is going to be so bad...

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Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to celticlord2112)
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RE: This is very important to new users - 10/2/2007 12:36:21 PM   
toservez


Posts: 1733
Joined: 9/7/2006
From: All over now in Minnesota
Status: offline
I will be quick because there will be many. Your views are your own and only yours. Right and wrong just do not apply. Way too much this is the only way to define for most people who live life interacting with human beings whether in the life or not.

This is absolutely how it is definitions are lame and for the closed and narrow minded. Human beings needs, desires, wants, personalities and other things are all over the map. The it is either this or that just does not work outside of day dreaming.

Read your profile too, I am not sure you could write a more “I am married looking to cheat profile.”


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I am sorry I do not fit Webster's defintion of a slave but thankfully my Master is not Webster.

"Anything that contradicts experience and logic should be abandoned." - H.H. The 14th Dalai Lama

(in reply to stpaulslaveuser)
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RE: This is very important to new users - 10/2/2007 12:37:14 PM   
akisha


Posts: 2071
Joined: 6/25/2005
Status: offline
Wow, so glad you decided to clear that up for all of us.

Geez

There is NO SUCH THINGS as one right way to have a bdsm relationship, or a vanilla relationship, or an open or poly relationship.
 
We are all ADULTS, and can decide for ourselves what does and what does not work for us. It is NO ONES place to tell others what is the "One True Way" That's a bunch of bullshit.
 
No one has ever said it's easy being a Dominant. Hell I know that it takes alot of work to be the one in control all of the time and I'm pretty sure 89% of the rest of the people on here (Dominant and submissive alike) realize that too.

My Dom used to spend alot of time talking with me to see what it was that I would like to experience then spend more time working out a way to give us both that experience and make it wonderful for both of us.

Just because you believe in something or a certain way of doing things, does not mean the rest of the millions of us involved in WIITWD have to agree with you.


eekk, says i replied to LordVelvet lol which I wasn't, was replying to the OP

< Message edited by akisha -- 10/2/2007 12:40:46 PM >


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I'm confused.... No wait!!! Maybe I'm not

It's not a blonde moment! It's momentary peroxide posioning. ;)

Your pain makes me smile ~ Happy Bunny

532-095-649

(in reply to LordVelvet)
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RE: This is very important to new users - 10/2/2007 12:37:27 PM   
cuffnspankme


Posts: 2812
Joined: 6/14/2007
Status: offline
I have the popcorn right here. This should be good...

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I do not know why it is, but the condition of slavery makes a woman very beautiful. It removes inhibitions to the manifestation of her femininity and her deepest needs.

(in reply to celticlord2112)
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RE: This is very important to new users - 10/2/2007 12:40:25 PM   
chellekitty


Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline
i don't have the energy to roast anyone today...or even add any snarky comments...wow...must be loosing my touch...

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One thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve. ~Albert Schweitzer

(in reply to cuffnspankme)
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RE: This is very important to new users - 10/2/2007 12:40:52 PM   
LadyLynx


Posts: 1098
Joined: 7/24/2007
Status: offline
lol not everyone thinks that it is easy being a Dom. Nor is it easy being a sub. or a Switch.  Each role has it's own issues, each person has stories to tell about their trials and tribulations to get where they are now.  Keep in mind that what you have said (while interesting :)) it is still only your view of things.  Don't make the mistake of trying to push your views on anybody else.
There always have been and probably always will be those who claim things that are not true. Human nature.  Is it annoying? Hell yeah! Sometimes I think, "if I talk to one more little twit who claims that because he was a slave in a past life, and that he has no limits--" ok I digress.    One hell of a 1st post.  Like I said I enjoyed reading it. however it was alittle obnoxious. I certainly hope that you aren't that obnoxious in all of your posts. Because while you are seriously cute, that ain't going to keep you from getting slammed.  lol.  And I can pretty much guarentee that alot of those slammers will be female subs.  heh. keep in mind, they maybe subs, but they ain't meek in the least.

**could you hand me 2 marshmallows? and are there any grahamcrackers and chocolate?mmmmmmmmmmm**

_____________________________

Our community maybe openminded as a whole, but it is still made up of individuals who bring in their own opinions,baggage and agendas!

Known as SwitchWitch in my local community,and on IRC Bondage.

I also go by the nic SwitchWitch on MDS.

(in reply to LordVelvet)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: This is very important to new users - 10/2/2007 12:41:34 PM   
akisha


Posts: 2071
Joined: 6/25/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: chellekitty

i don't have the energy to roast anyone today...or even add any snarky comments...wow...must be loosing my touch...


That's no good

*tosses chelle some kitty treats and some catnip for engery*  

_____________________________

I'm confused.... No wait!!! Maybe I'm not

It's not a blonde moment! It's momentary peroxide posioning. ;)

Your pain makes me smile ~ Happy Bunny

532-095-649

(in reply to chellekitty)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: This is very important to new users - 10/2/2007 12:42:00 PM   
mnottertail


Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline
Yah, well fuck it, look at me----

it isn't easy being sleazy either--------

but I make it look like a cakewalk.

Ron

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Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30


(in reply to LadyLynx)
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RE: This is very important to new users - 10/2/2007 12:42:30 PM   
LordVelvet


Posts: 311
Joined: 4/25/2006
Status: offline
passes the bag over to LadyLynx

(in reply to LadyLynx)
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RE: This is very important to new users - 10/2/2007 12:43:16 PM   
UR2Badored


Posts: 506
Joined: 2/3/2007
Status: offline
The almighty Oz has spoken.  Ignore the little man behind the curtain.

I agree with toservez's observation:
I wish married men who cannot control their wives and want to play a no lip game of simon sez......would not use this site to prey on submissives who seek out a D/s relationship........But I aint gettin' my wish either. 

< Message edited by UR2Badored -- 10/2/2007 1:37:15 PM >


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A man who carries a cat by the tail learns something he can learn in no other way
Mark Twain

(in reply to celticlord2112)
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RE: This is very important to new users - 10/2/2007 12:43:23 PM   
chellekitty


Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline
i think i might just need to borrow someone else's touch...who wants to touch me...ooo i do have the energy to troll...lol

_____________________________

One thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve. ~Albert Schweitzer

(in reply to akisha)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: This is very important to new users - 10/2/2007 12:43:34 PM   
BOUNTYHUNTER


Posts: 9259
Joined: 2/5/2004
Status: offline
Feels the girls head, damm are you sick,,,lol

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US going to hell in a hand basket/

(in reply to chellekitty)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: This is very important to new users - 10/2/2007 12:44:21 PM   
LadyLynx


Posts: 1098
Joined: 7/24/2007
Status: offline
Actually I personally see both submission and dominance as a gift one can give to the other. I know it does sound totally cornball, but I am a hopeless romantic! **but of course it is ONLY my opinion.**

_____________________________

Our community maybe openminded as a whole, but it is still made up of individuals who bring in their own opinions,baggage and agendas!

Known as SwitchWitch in my local community,and on IRC Bondage.

I also go by the nic SwitchWitch on MDS.

(in reply to LadyLynx)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: This is very important to new users - 10/2/2007 12:46:16 PM   
chellekitty


Posts: 3923
Joined: 3/27/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BOUNTYHUNTER

Feels the girls head, damm are you sick,,,lol


pssst wrong end


_____________________________

One thing I know: the only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve. ~Albert Schweitzer

(in reply to BOUNTYHUNTER)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: This is very important to new users - 10/2/2007 12:47:36 PM   
celticlord2112


Posts: 5732
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: cuffnspankme

I have the popcorn right here. This should be good...


Care to share?


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(in reply to cuffnspankme)
Profile   Post #: 20
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