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RE: Age-ism - 1/29/2008 7:23:33 PM   
collaredncontent


Posts: 81
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From: GA, USA.
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Another question just for the sake of playing Devil's Advocate. Why do I need to be taken seriously? Honestly. I'm a sub not a Dom but if I were a Dom and a fourty year old sub told me that he/she couldn't take me seriously based on my age...what then? Life simply goes on. I have plenty of people who do take me seriously so I can afford the masses who decide not to. My ego can be a burden at times and I cannot claim that I've never gotten upset because someone judged me on my age before, but the fact of the matter is: people judge. It's not an accusation or a finger wagging, it's just simple fact. Our brains are wired to make judgements, in the wild this would serve a better purpose than making friends. We analyze data, we sort by information, and we tend to take things at face value on snap reflex. It's human nature. So when someone makes that snap call about you, be confident that they don't have the full picture. Maybe they'll put aside the snap call and look closer, maybe they'll not be bothered enough to ever look again. In the end, how much of your life has changed? Not much.

-Puts his soap box away.- All in all, you can't let someone's snap call influence your life too much...and I've been forced to think about all the times I've made snap judgements on people based on any factor and not just the ones listed. Generalizing serves a purpose, to put colored lenses over your eyes with which you view your world. Take people on a case by case basis and try to just tweak those lenses a bit.

Not everyone is going to like you, but hey not everyone is going to hate you either. I'll just try to take what I can get and not worry too hard about the rest.
-Brian.

(in reply to ZENBDSM)
Profile   Post #: 61
RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/29/2008 7:26:14 PM   
Searcher38


Posts: 21
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A 21-year-old simply cannot be a Master. Impossible! After all, as we all know, only old, curmudgeonly farts can be TRUE Masters. I mean, Mozart - OK, he was composing at 5 ... And Tiger Woods .. OK, he was winning golf tournaments as a pre-teen.

I could go on, but it would be helpful to look up two words -- prodigy and preternatural.  

(in reply to BlackPhx)
Profile   Post #: 62
RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/29/2008 7:28:18 PM   
Alumbrado


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Mozart was a late bloomer compared to Camille Saint-Saens

(in reply to Searcher38)
Profile   Post #: 63
RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/29/2008 7:34:38 PM   
Alumbrado


Posts: 5560
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quote:

Another question just for the sake of playing Devil's Advocate. Why do I need to be taken seriously?


Ahhh... somebody who gets it.


The constant demand for 'Twueness' on these boards and elsewhere is just a keyboard commando game.

(in reply to Alumbrado)
Profile   Post #: 64
RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/29/2008 8:02:54 PM   
gorgeous1


Posts: 367
Joined: 11/14/2007
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My Master was 21 when I met him. I was 23. I was the FIRST person he ever laid a riding crop to. I had never had a riding crop taken to me. We were both Kink Virgins.

So, I suppose my answer to you would be this: A 21 year old can certainly be a Master, as long as he understands a few basic concepts.

1. When he is "in role" he is responsible for the safety of his slave, and that should be his number one priority...PROTECT THE PROPERTY (his play-mate's physical and mental well-being).

2. BE a sponge. Learn, learn, learn! Read as many books as they can find, and find a mentor if they can.

3. Don't let ego and pride get the best of them. Don't be afraid to take constructive criticism/feedback, even if it's from their submissive.

That's all my master had to offer when I met him...a willingness to listen and learn, and a cheap cheap pair of nipple clamps and a riding crop. I thought he was hot shit, and I still do after 11 years.

So, to all you young whipper snappers out there dying to find out exactly what it would look like to see your red handprint on somebody's ass, act like you know everything, but listen and learn as if you know nothing. Find a submissive with no experience so that just the mere sight of a crop or collar makes them wet, and BINGO! You've got magic and chemistry! As long as you make decisions that keep you both physically and mentally safe, YOU CAN'T GO WRONG. Forget all the bullshit about age and experience...find a newbie who's as new as yourself...grab hands, hold on tight, and walk down this kinky path together- learn to trust one another enough to communicate EVERYTHING and you will both find fulfillment and a freedom you never knew existed. I know that sounds hoakey, but it's true.

_____________________________

Wife/property of CapnSpankins...and loving every minute of it! Visit my juicy blog http://www.kinkycrafts.info/gorgeous-blog/gblog.php for updates on my slave training!

(in reply to GoddessTeaze)
Profile   Post #: 65
RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/29/2008 8:07:26 PM   
dcnovice


Posts: 37282
Joined: 8/2/2006
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quote:

Edited to add, my mom could silence any of us with just a look... talk about knowing how to dominate us


Well, mom does rhyme with dom.

_____________________________

No matter how cynical you become,
it's never enough to keep up.

JANE WAGNER, THE SEARCH FOR SIGNS OF
INTELLIGENT LIFE IN THE UNIVERSE

(in reply to juliaoceania)
Profile   Post #: 66
RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/29/2008 8:25:29 PM   
juliaoceania


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From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
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quote:

ORIGINAL: dcnovice

quote:

Edited to add, my mom could silence any of us with just a look... talk about knowing how to dominate us


Well, mom does rhyme with dom.


lmao!

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to dcnovice)
Profile   Post #: 67
RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/29/2008 8:27:19 PM   
solia


Posts: 115
Joined: 8/1/2004
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My favorites are the 18 year old masters with 10 years of real life experience.  I'd like to know how that worked.

(in reply to GoddessTeaze)
Profile   Post #: 68
RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/29/2008 8:36:25 PM   
CuriousLord


Posts: 3911
Joined: 4/3/2007
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I often wonder why other people mature so slowly.

It's all someone's natural pace, I suppose.

(in reply to GoddessTeaze)
Profile   Post #: 69
RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/29/2008 8:49:10 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


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Joined: 10/25/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: CuriousLord
I often wonder why other people mature so slowly.

It's all someone's natural pace, I suppose.

*chuckle* I've often pouted to myself and my friends about that also- how I used to get told SO often how I "am so wise and beyond my years" and as I get older most people will catch up and it won't be so different.

Of course, fewer people also tell me I can't know what I'm talking about- even though I'm saying the same things I used to say.

But I find it you present it to people like that, you just get told you're being an uppity youngster who thinks he knows it all.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to CuriousLord)
Profile   Post #: 70
RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/29/2008 8:57:38 PM   
fluffyswitch


Posts: 1108
Joined: 9/29/2007
From: Buffalo
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

Of course, fewer people also tell me I can't know what I'm talking about- even though I'm saying the same things I used to say.

But I find it you present it to people like that, you just get told you're being an uppity youngster who thinks he knows it all.


i get that too--but more in my academics than here. when i'm in seminar i'll say something and people will look at me and go sweet goddess she knows what the hell she's talking about. i guess i didn't realize that intelligence was like cheese--better aged. though if i point that out i become a wise ass.


_____________________________


“Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.” churchill

the first rule of fluff club is that you don't talk about fluff club!

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
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RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/29/2008 9:37:31 PM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessTeaze

How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master?
I find it hard to understand how one so young could have the understanding, wisdom and life experiance which is needed to be a Master.

From what age do you take them serious?

Thanks for your answers.

GoddezzT`




How can someone at *insert your age here* really think so lowly of an entire of group that you haven't met?

I think my owner does a damn good job and we've yet to have anyone who wasn't biased (meaning: wanted to fuck me) say he wasn't a "real" master/owner/dom/what-the-fuck-ever.


_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to GoddessTeaze)
Profile   Post #: 72
RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/29/2008 9:38:54 PM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessTeaze

quote:

ORIGINAL: takenbyjohnr07
It's the individual that you should go by.

Ofcourse, even I don't want to generalise, but age is something magical don't you agree?



Oh God NO!

Every single man who has ever disrepected my relationship seriously has been over 45. Gimme the 22 year old any day.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to GoddessTeaze)
Profile   Post #: 73
RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/29/2008 9:41:04 PM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

You guys are seriously responding to someone who had a misspelled signature line for a long time and who regularly uses the term "chucklz"?


Ok... valid point. It's been a long day and I wasn't really thinking.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)
Profile   Post #: 74
RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/29/2008 9:44:54 PM   
fluffyswitch


Posts: 1108
Joined: 9/29/2007
From: Buffalo
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessTeaze

quote:

ORIGINAL: takenbyjohnr07
It's the individual that you should go by.

Ofcourse, even I don't want to generalise, but age is something magical don't you agree?



Oh God NO!

Every single man who has ever disrepected my relationship seriously has been over 45. Gimme the 22 year old any day.


agreed. 21 year old men will look me in teh eye and take me seriously. there are a lot less older men who will do the same. not saying that there are no older men who will but there are a lot more younger men who will.


_____________________________


“Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.” churchill

the first rule of fluff club is that you don't talk about fluff club!

(in reply to AquaticSub)
Profile   Post #: 75
RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/29/2008 9:49:30 PM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: fluffyswitch

agreed. 21 year old men will look me in teh eye and take me seriously. there are a lot less older men who will do the same. not saying that there are no older men who will but there are a lot more younger men who will.



Ugh... "Hurr, you are young and have boobs. Leave the guy you love cause I'm older and all dominate an' shit and I have fancy floggers, durr".

PS. No offense intended to the lovely gentlemen in this age range who we have made friends with and have been nothing but respectful. You know who you are... 

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to fluffyswitch)
Profile   Post #: 76
RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/29/2008 9:53:07 PM   
fluffyswitch


Posts: 1108
Joined: 9/29/2007
From: Buffalo
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

quote:

ORIGINAL: fluffyswitch

agreed. 21 year old men will look me in teh eye and take me seriously. there are a lot less older men who will do the same. not saying that there are no older men who will but there are a lot more younger men who will.



Ugh... "Hurr, you are young and have boobs. Leave the guy you love cause I'm older and all dominate an' shit and I have fancy floggers, durr".



while i mumble about what i used to do when i was your age...

that's the one that gets me the most. i can't stand it when i get that line.


_____________________________


“Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.” churchill

the first rule of fluff club is that you don't talk about fluff club!

(in reply to AquaticSub)
Profile   Post #: 77
RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/29/2008 9:54:19 PM   
Cougarandkitten


Posts: 1375
Joined: 1/21/2008
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Fast reply: IMO Age is just a number. It depends on what you've seen and experienced throughout your lifetime. I was on my own for the most part at 15 years old,  by the time I was 21, the shit that I had gone through.....that's another thread, but you get my point, I'm sure.

Cougar

_____________________________

" You become responsible forever for what you have tamed. " ~ Antione de Saint-Exupery

"I've been sleeping a thousand years it seems,got to open my eyes to everything.... without a thought without a voice without a soul....." ~ Evanescance

(in reply to fluffyswitch)
Profile   Post #: 78
RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/29/2008 11:08:36 PM   
Exquemelin


Posts: 113
Joined: 2/2/2007
From: CT
Status: offline
Ok I'm 24, my sub is 22. For both of us this is our first BDSM relationship. Who knows, maybe that 3 years makes all the difference in the world to you but I'll assume it doesn't. Should she have instead searched for a 40 year old master? Obviously I can't provide her with what she needs, I mean being close to the same age as her obviously ruins our shot in at making this work, right? And I guess I gotta go back to testing my toys on my leg and practicing my aim on pillows. Maybe I can go to the local play party and watch, cause obviously I can't play being only 24. I suppose I need what probably 10 more years of haning out in dungeons and going to fetish conventions before I can take a sub. I guess if you're a 40 year old master looking for 22 year old sub you should send me an email, I mean I've come to the light. I can't take care of her. Somebody's got to, and at least I can put you in contact with her. I understand maybe you don't want a Master 10, 15, perhaps 20 years younger than you but guess what. I wasn't especially interested in a sub, 10, 15 or 20 years older than me either. Sorry I wasn't not just looking for somebody to say "Yes, Sir" I was looking for somebody to explore with, grow with, and if we're lucky fall madly in love if. I suppose that could have happened with somebody significantly older but I saw it much more likely to be with somebody around the same age.  Seeing the light, Ex

< Message edited by Exquemelin -- 1/29/2008 11:12:32 PM >


_____________________________

testing
The Hammer is my penis.

(in reply to Cougarandkitten)
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RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/29/2008 11:26:02 PM   
chaos9071


Posts: 38
Joined: 5/8/2006
Status: offline
It's not the years it is the mileage that counts... Some are wise beyong their years.

(in reply to Justme696)
Profile   Post #: 80
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