RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master?

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RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/29/2008 11:34:02 PM

Jester0587

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quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessTeaze

How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master?
I find it hard to understand how one so young could have the understanding, wisdom and life experiance which is needed to be a Master.

From what age do you take them serious?

Thanks for your answers.

GoddezzT`

So call them "Dom" and get over it. I mean, what's in a name anyway? Not to mention, there are some that can just accell faster than others. My highschool physics teacher was 20, for instance.

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RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/29/2008 11:43:49 PM

juliaoceania

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quote:

Roof over the head and food in the belly are steps one and two towards raising "productive" people. If the parents don't take those responsibilities to heart, the rest is a lost cause.

I just wanted to say these steps are what make good dominants and people who can sustain long term relationships. Someone who is willing to do whatever is necessary to take care of what is theirs can be a top notch dominant person, or a top notch submissive one...

I think that is what bugs me most about threads such as these.. somehow there is this perception that is doesn't take much to be a good submissive... it does. It takes the ability to know oneself, the ability to be patient. It takes the trait of being trusting. It takes dedication... it is almost like dominants are seen as more wise than submissives... they aren't just because they are oriented one way and submissives another

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RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/29/2008 11:53:39 PM

petpete

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i would not support entirely GT's claim here. As dear justme says that they have to learn from somewhere and safety applies in all ages and all genders. The only thing i would add is that the players need to trust each other very well and do have some feelings amongst each other before anything else. Its almost like young people having there first sexual experience. Take care and have always trustworthy feelings for each other before anything else. Age has not a great deal to do with anything..

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RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/30/2008 12:04:57 AM

celticlord2112

Posts: 5732
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quote:

I think that is what bugs me most about threads such as these.. somehow there is this perception that is doesn't take much to be a good submissive... it does. It takes the ability to know oneself, the ability to be patient. It takes the trait of being trusting. It takes dedication... it is almost like dominants are seen as more wise than submissives... they aren't just because they are oriented one way and submissives another

I didn't see that perception in this particular thread, but I do agree with you that "submissive" does not mean "weak" or "helpless".

Sun Tzu writes in "The Art of War" that "when the officers are valiant and the troops ineffective, the army is in distress."

Similarly, if the dominant is strong and the submissive is weak, the relationship is in distress.

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RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/30/2008 12:11:29 AM

MadameCris

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quote:

ORIGINAL: SirMIkeSD

I am sure some people will disagree with me, but I don't feel at 21 someone has the expereince or stability to be a Master. I am sure there are those rare exceptions. Also I could see being mentored to become a Master.

Mike

I have to agree with Mike.

A young Dom/Domme can respond to the urge to dominate and explore that with a submissive partner, but the youth lack real life experiences.

There are things that can't be learned from books but must be "lived".

Time mellows and matures our personalities in whatever role we assume.

This is not to say that a young person cant be dominent or submissive.

We humans may reach our physically peak around our late teens to early 20's, but our inner beauty develops over time; allowing for a proper maturing and mellowing of the spirt, soul, & temperment.

respectfully, Madame Cris

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RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/30/2008 12:26:54 AM

collaredncontent

Posts: 81
Joined: 1/21/2008
From: GA, USA.
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Maybe we are all getting lost in semantics? What does it mean to be a "Master"? I think we could as many deffinitions as we have people on this forum. Personally I think it's between the parties involved. Jack is new to all of this but I will still call him Master and he will still be a Master to me. Will you define him as a 'Master' or a 'Dominant' or a 'Whatever term you prefer'? Maybe. Most certainly, actually. Will that change who or what he is? Probably not. Not to me, at least. In the end it is my belief that labels are a personal preference and you can only be labeled by others if you allow them to.

This isn't meant as a personal attack, let me clarify that. I'm not saying that if Jack doesn't fit your deffinition of a "Master" that your opinion doesn't matter or that you're just foolish. You just think differently, and frankly I'd rather people all had different and unique points of view than if we all drew the same conclusions all the time. These forums would die rather quickly without the mental debates.

-Brian.

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RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/30/2008 12:48:12 AM

PrizedPosession

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i saw this post earlier today and it made me think about it...and though i have not read this whole thread, though i will after i finish my reply.

There are some old souls in young bodies and to discriminate against an entire younger generation isn't only fair but it inhibits those that want to learn and may even make it difficult to approach others for approach because of mockery that they know what they want so young and are just looking for guidance.

He may not be a "Master" of this lifestyle, He may not be a "Master" of spanking, whipping, etc. But He is a Master of me. He knows me inside out and knows how to control me, to calm me, love me, cherish me, discipline me,speak to me, hear me, touch me, teach me and He has enough grace to learn from me as well. That is how He is Master to me.

-bobcat
But that is just me.

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RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/30/2008 12:55:43 AM

AquaticSub

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quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

I think that is what bugs me most about threads such as these.. somehow there is this perception that is doesn't take much to be a good submissive... it does. It takes the ability to know oneself, the ability to be patient. It takes the trait of being trusting. It takes dedication... it is almost like dominants are seen as more wise than submissives... they aren't just because they are oriented one way and submissives another

Bingo. Just once I'd like to see the people complaining about young masters say that no one can accept a collar if they are under 30.

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Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

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RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/30/2008 1:01:18 AM

collaredncontent

Posts: 81
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From: GA, USA.
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quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

I think that is what bugs me most about threads such as these.. somehow there is this perception that is doesn't take much to be a good submissive... it does. It takes the ability to know oneself, the ability to be patient. It takes the trait of being trusting. It takes dedication... it is almost like dominants are seen as more wise than submissives... they aren't just because they are oriented one way and submissives another

Bingo. Just once I'd like to see the people complaining about young masters say that no one can accept a collar if they are under 30.

Agreed. I do not want to give mine back! And...I'm far, far from being a great submissive. I have a great deal of self exploring to do both on my own time and with my Master. But that's how it should be. What fun is a journey that will only take a few steps to complete? In fact...I'll never be the 'perfect' sub/pet. I don't think it's even possible. And what do you do when you finally become 'perfect', your journey is over....ah, that is until you realize that perfection isn't the ultimate goal.

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RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/30/2008 1:17:23 AM

CuriousLord

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You know, I think it's really rather silly that people have a hard time understanding that it's quite simple to be reasonably mature by one's mid teen years. I could've claimed to be fourty and you guys probably would've bought that, save for my lack of old-times knowledge with which to make age-appropriate references.

Still, I figured I'd make my point as someone who believes I'm 20 decided to send me this after I ignored her first email (for being rather vulgar in sentiment):

quote:

You cannot even be gentleman enough to send an email because you know you have been a very, very, naughty boy not even close being a Dominant. You need help. You are a very sick puppy. Grow up.

A snippet from the third email, which makes my point (although I'm afraid pasting more would be identifying and so inappropriate):

quote:

I am 48.
You are a 20 year old nieve man.
You could be a teenager and invite me to chat if you are not afraid of me

(No, I don't understand what the "You could be a teenager [..]" part means, either. If anyone figures it out, I'd appreciate it.)

What provoked this obviously mature 48-year old Dominant to say such things to someone less than half her age? This particular "nieve" fellow suggested that a black vote of 80% for a canidate mixed with a white vote of 25% suggested that race probably effected the vote. (I know, I'm so horrible. :P)

Anyhow.. I have another point to this, too. Because the lady was 48-years old, she was under the sincere impression that she was automatically morally superior and more mature... that she needed to correct someone who was younger because he obviously isn't to the same caliber.

Sadly, this sentiment seems to be hardly constrained to this one individual.

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RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/30/2008 1:20:11 AM

AquaticSub

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While you are probably going to get the post deleted for posting her message..

Thanks for proving my point about people over 45 being the really immature and disrespectful ones. Icky. You'd think if age is so magical she'd have learned some manners by now.

< Message edited by AquaticSub -- 1/30/2008 1:27:05 AM >

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Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

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RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/30/2008 1:25:54 AM

CuriousLord

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Ack. Is posting messages without names against the ToS? I remember having seen threads where OP's included messages from people on the other side for discussion, but this admittedly from a forum regular so a bit more edgy.

Edit: Ah wells. I'm 4:30 AM and I have the flu. Going to need sleep, so I guess the mods'll kill it if appropriate.

Peace all.

< Message edited by CuriousLord -- 1/30/2008 1:33:53 AM >

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RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/30/2008 1:33:05 AM

AquaticSub

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I don't know what the exact rules are but I think posting messages is a no-no. I could be wrong though.

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Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

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RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/30/2008 1:33:46 AM

Aeryn and vesper

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As a 19 year old dominant with my own slave I feel I can help to answer this question, it is my belief that it is not the age but the maturity of the person in question that matters. I have been living with my girl for 2 1/2 years now and it has taken this long to learn what it takes to be a good dominant and I'm sure that I still have a lot to learn.
I believe that the measure of a good Dom/me is not their age but in their experience and ability to see that there is still more to learn. Evaluate each you come across with the same scrutiny as you would any other and cast aside any preconceptions that age really matters, true there is a much higher chance of your younger dominant being immature but believe me, there are much more immature dominants out there that are much, much older.
Oh, and why do you simply ask about Dom/mes? I feel that younger submissives are often hard to take seriously too.

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RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/30/2008 1:43:37 AM

MissMagnolia

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Agreed A and v. No one is so mature and experienced that we have nothing more to learn. Learning never stops, in any area of life. To say we know all is simply arrogant.

At 47 and a D, I couldn't collar someone who was in their teens or early 20's. In my experience, males this age are full of hormones and, no matter HOW much they deny it, it is often about kinky sex. There is nothing wrong with that, but I do believe that often young masters are hormone driven, rather than dominant driven.

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RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/30/2008 1:51:33 AM

Justme696

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quote:

ORIGINAL: collaredncontent

quote:

ORIGINAL: Justme696

quote:

ORIGINAL: collaredncontent

I'm sorry, but I can't take anyone seriously who spells things out like 'Thanx' and 'grinz' and so forth, I don't care how old you are.

-Brian.

You judge a person on 2 words? mmm
OF course you can dislike.....but this sounded agressive lol

Ah the barrier of text, it wasn't meant to be aggressive. More like a brow loft. I know people can type however they please but when you agrue that age is how you define maturity and then type out words that irk me...it's really hard for me to take the argument in question seriously. And I must admit as a 22 year old brat I scoff at being labeled by my age. Nothing I can do but wait for this big sphere of the Earth to go around the Sun a few more times.

I respect you as much..no matter what age. Yes but I know the feeling of "you are young, you don't know sh*t".
But I am sure it was not meant like that here.

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RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/30/2008 1:58:04 AM

CuriousLord

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MissMagnolia

I couldn't collar someone who was in their teens or early 20's. In my experience, males this age are full of hormones and, no matter HOW much they deny it, it is often about kinky sex.

Oh, man, if I got you alone in a room.. we'd freaking SCREW for HOURS! Hah ur so hot. Lts fuckzorz right now on chat! U dnt need a condm wen ur flyin wit me, babeh! We'l whip out da 9-tails n da floggerz n da chains n have us a ball!

The best thing about the flu is having an excuse to be utterly stupid. And, so long as you remind people that they're feverishly sick, it's understandable. :D
PS- I do mean this playfully, by the way, not in any sort of ill manner.

---

You do raise a good point about motivations. Younger Dom's are more likely to be interested in sex (as their sex drive is still strong) than older Dominant's who are.. well, I guess mostly just doing it to be dominant only? This does seem like something good for one to understand when looking for a partner.

< Message edited by CuriousLord -- 1/30/2008 2:03:13 AM >

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RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/30/2008 2:10:54 AM

Justme696

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quote:

Younger Dom's are more likely to be interested in sex (as their sex drive is still strong) than older Dominant's who are.. well, I guess mostly just doing it to be dominant only? This does seem like something good for one to understand when looking for a partner.

IF I look back at myself...I can agree with that (not that I am OLD OLD :P ). But with a much younger sub/slave...it still can come back :P . But yes..the focus changes.

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RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/30/2008 4:53:45 AM

fluffyswitch

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MadameCris

quote:

ORIGINAL: SirMIkeSD

I am sure some people will disagree with me, but I don't feel at 21 someone has the expereince or stability to be a Master. I am sure there are those rare exceptions. Also I could see being mentored to become a Master.

Mike

I have to agree with Mike.
A young Dom/Domme can respond to the urge to dominate and explore that with a submissive partner, but the youth lack real life experiences.
There are things that can't be learned from books but must be "lived".
Time mellows and matures our personalities in whatever role we assume.
This is not to say that a young person cant be dominent or submissive.
We humans may reach our physically peak around our late teens to early 20's, but our inner beauty develops over time; allowing for a proper maturing and mellowing of the spirt, soul, & temperment.

respectfully, Madame Cris

but if we all wait for older dominants then there will be no way to gain that 'lived' experience in the first place as the dominant will still be inexperienced.

and i'm not sure how i feel about needing to 'mellow' but i'll respectfully decline commenting on that since that would be a whole other thread in and of itself.

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RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/30/2008 4:58:41 AM

lilabbotsfordgrl

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There's something to be said for experience but also something to be said for raw unrestraint instinctual domination. I don't think anyone can define an age that is "okay" for someone to express their dominance.

After all, I was having submissive feelings and cravings at 7. Age of consent issues aside, part of me was already yearning to submit and be taken. So to say someone can't be dominant at 21 is incorrect, imo. Perhaps they're not mature or experienced enough for YOU, but there's no reason they can't be right for someone else.

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