RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master?

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RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/30/2008 9:32:54 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessTeaze

How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master?
I find it hard to understand how one so young could have the understanding, wisdom and life experiance which is needed to be a Master.

From what age do you take them serious?

Thanks for your answers.

GoddezzT`

Its maturity to me, plain and simple, some have it early on, some don't, soem find it later, some don't. I get to know people who intrigue me, it goes from there, the titles we give one another we obviously feel the other has earned or we would nto have offered.

as to the parenting comments beign tossed around, I fail to see what being a parent has to do with being a Dom/me / Master / Lord / Mistress or any other 'Top' title you prefer or have, btu that could just be me.

some folks have very old souls, some have young, you won't know til yoy give them a chance and talk to them, tho I generally am all for giving those folks who seem decent the benefit of the doubt to not judge til speakign with them at least fist.

and for the record, my soul is very very old, tho I am the first to admit I often am the most immature in the room

(in reply to GoddessTeaze)

RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/30/2008 9:35:54 AM

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From: Portland, OR
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Q: "How old do you need to own a slave?"

A: "Old Enough."

It isn't the responsibility of the outside observer to judge the validity of a private, consensual relationship.

A young dominant might not necessarily equate with skilled, experienced, or even good dominant. Yet the same is true of a submissive. If a man or woman wishes to assume the mantel of dominance, it will be by their actions with their partners that they are judged by.

If I had learned of the lifestyle at 18, I would have sought out other partners of similar age to learn with. Not from, with. This is no different than the lessons I learned about relationships at the age of 18. D/s relationships are just that; relationships. Touting them as the holy grail of relationships speaks more of inflating one own's ego than anything about others in D/s.

Note, of course, we can exchange the words 'old' with 'young', and '18' for '80' and these statements still apply.

Stephan

_____________________________

Nosce Te Ipsum

"The blade itself incites to violence" - Homer

Men: Find a Woman here

(in reply to CuriousLord)

RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/30/2008 9:37:30 AM

Rover

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Fast Reply to no one in particular....

Let's set aside for the moment any personal preference for age in either a Dominant or submissive, and discuss the narrow issue of what age one can *be* a "Master".

Given that no one ever "knows it all" at any age, what does one need to know in order to *be* someone's Master? Are there universally accepted, or even generally accepted, community standards? Not for personal preference, mind you. But in order to *be* Master to anyone.

If so, what are they?

Who enforces them?

Are they applied equally to all ages?

That's just a start, but it's something.

John

_____________________________

"Man's mind stretched to a new idea never goes back to its original dimensions."

Sri da Avabhas

(in reply to GreedyTop)

RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/30/2008 9:40:36 AM

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There are lots of good answers here that reflect my thoughts on the subject. I was playing with cuffs and rope (and those obliging partners who enjoyed them too) verrrry early on and have experienced some of the prejudice age experiences in this lifestyle, but the real fact is this... it doesn't matter what you call yourself, what matters far more is what you know and believe about yourself - your abilities, your limitations, your desires, your expectations and your falibility.

To call yourself "Master" is meaningless unless others recognize it based on their experience - not their perceptions and certainly not your assertations. I am dominant, others have called me "Master" at various times, I've even been introduced as "A Master" on a couple of occasions. What matters most to me is the understanding of myself and that of those others I choose to be intimate with.

So, frankly, no matter how old someone may be, if they introduce themselves as "a Master" I take it with a big old shaker of salt. Let others make that connection for you based on your behavior, your words and your deeds.

(in reply to GreedyTop)

RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/30/2008 9:45:59 AM

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well, they might not be as experianced as someone older, but everyone has to start somewhere. No one just naturally knows everything, so i guess theyll get better with time. (^^)'

(in reply to GoddessTeaze)

RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/30/2008 9:47:52 AM

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Joined: 12/27/2006
From: Portland, OR
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Rover

Fast Reply to no one in particular....

Let's set aside for the moment any personal preference for age in either a Dominant or submissive, and discuss the narrow issue of what age one can *be* a "Master".

Given that no one ever "knows it all" at any age, what does one need to know in order to *be* someone's Master? Are there universally accepted, or even generally accepted, community standards? Not for personal preference, mind you. But in order to *be* Master to anyone.

If so, what are they?

Who enforces them?

Are they applied equally to all ages?

That's just a start, but it's something.

John

For me:

Master - 1. title a slave uses to refer to her owner. 2. title a gorean trained slave refers to a male dominant.

A narrow definition, but it's mine. It's part of why I don't refer to other people as "Master." YMMV

Stephan

< Message edited by Stephann -- 1/30/2008 9:48:27 AM >

_____________________________

Nosce Te Ipsum

"The blade itself incites to violence" - Homer

Men: Find a Woman here

(in reply to Rover)

RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/30/2008 9:58:27 AM

Posts: 367
Joined: 11/14/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Rover

Fast Reply to no one in particular....

Let's set aside for the moment any personal preference for age in either a Dominant or submissive, and discuss the narrow issue of what age one can *be* a "Master".

Given that no one ever "knows it all" at any age, what does one need to know in order to *be* someone's Master? Are there universally accepted, or even generally accepted, community standards? Not for personal preference, mind you. But in order to *be* Master to anyone.

If so, what are they?

Who enforces them?

Are they applied equally to all ages?

That's just a start, but it's something.

John

I think all anyone needs to know to be a "Master" in the world of WIITWD is that safety, both physical and mental is the most important thing. Secondly, a Master should be willing to listen to his sub and take all feedback into consideration without letting his ego cloud his thinking. Third, he should be flexible and ready to modify his plans should the need arise.

I am of the school of thought that there is no "school" from which we graduate. There are no hard and fast rules, no laws, no right or wrong way to do anything...and there is no fairy godmother who appears in a cloud of pixie dust to wave her magic wand over you as she says, "Congratulations! You passed all your exams, and now you're a REAL MASTER!" The things I listed above would serve anyone well in any situation life throws their way.

I really get annoyed by the people who try to put kink into a neat little box all tied up in a pretty bow. Frankly, the over-analyzing of kink, the attempt to de-mystify it, and the belief that there is a ONE TRUE WAY to Dominate, and a ONE TRUE WAY to submit is...BULLSHIT.

Some of these people who piss and moan and argue about what's right and what's wrong remind me of those nincompoop kids who were always spoiling everybody else's fun on the playground with their whining, "NO! You can't be a princess too! There can only be ONE princess!" SHEESH! It's make-believe! There are no rules! Have fun, and quit trying to ruin everybody else's fun, you big 'ole nincompoops!

And YES...I am feeling a bit bitchy today, and NO, I'm not PMSing.

_____________________________

Wife/property of CapnSpankins...and loving every minute of it! Visit my juicy blog http://www.kinkycrafts.info/gorgeous-blog/gblog.php for updates on my slave training!

(in reply to Rover)

RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/30/2008 10:29:52 AM

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Oh- yeah, and you know what? I think I just figured out a plain and simple answer to the big question...

QUESTION: What makes somebody a MASTER?

ANSWER: If your submissive just had the time of her life and all she can think about is how to get you to play with her again...
YOU 'DA MASTER!

Can I get an AMEN?

_____________________________

Wife/property of CapnSpankins...and loving every minute of it! Visit my juicy blog http://www.kinkycrafts.info/gorgeous-blog/gblog.php for updates on my slave training!

(in reply to gorgeous1)

RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/30/2008 11:16:06 AM

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Joined: 6/2/2004
From: New England
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quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessTeaze

How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master?
I find it hard to understand how one so young could have the understanding, wisdom and life experiance which is needed to be a Master.

From what age do you take them serious?

I wonder if this question would feel different to many if it were asked,"how can a 21 year old be a Mistress?" More curious would be to watch how the answers change when the sex in question is changed.

(in reply to GoddessTeaze)

RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/30/2008 11:49:34 AM

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amayos that question was brought up many times. It got the same reaction that this one did. To many young ones thinking becaused they watched Star Wars they can become mini yodas or yodets.

(in reply to amayos)

RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/30/2008 11:50:49 AM

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And too many people think their age makes them Obi Wan Kenobi.

Edited to add: It's a geek thing but Yoda was the guy's name, not his race so Yodets wouldn't apply.

< Message edited by AquaticSub -- 1/30/2008 11:55:04 AM >

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to Dnomyar)

RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/30/2008 11:50:49 AM

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Joined: 3/19/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: amayos

quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessTeaze

How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master?
I find it hard to understand how one so young could have the understanding, wisdom and life experiance which is needed to be a Master.

From what age do you take them serious?

I wonder if this question would feel different to many if it were asked,"how can a 21 year old be a Mistress?" More curious would be to watch how the answers change when the sex in question is changed.

ha, Brilliant!

< Message edited by MadameMarque -- 1/30/2008 11:53:29 AM >

(in reply to amayos)

RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/30/2008 12:13:07 PM

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Joined: 11/14/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

And too many people think their age makes them Obi Wan Kenobi.

Edited to add: It's a geek thing but Yoda was the guy's name, not his race so Yodets wouldn't apply.

Ah! Star Wars! I just have to share a cute story. My UM wanted me to make him an Obi Wan Kenobi costume, so I happily obliged. I made a flowing hooded overcoat, a tunic, a belt...it was pretty cool. Then he said to me, "But mom, what about the pants?" I told him I was still figuring out the best way to make the pants and he said, "Why don't you just go to www.obiwanpants.com?"

_____________________________

Wife/property of CapnSpankins...and loving every minute of it! Visit my juicy blog http://www.kinkycrafts.info/gorgeous-blog/gblog.php for updates on my slave training!

(in reply to AquaticSub)

RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/30/2008 12:17:31 PM

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Awww, that is so cute. I was somewhere around late middle/early high school when Episode I came out. I talked my mom into helping me make Amidala's parade dress, so we a found a pattern for a dress similar to the one in the movie and I lovingly tried to craft the decorations, including the fan thing she wore behind her. I even hand painted the symbols running down the front of her gown and did my best to make her petaled cape.

Yes... I am proud dork!

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to gorgeous1)

RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/30/2008 12:32:17 PM

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From: Portland, OR
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quote:

ORIGINAL: amayos

I wonder if this question would feel different to many if it were asked,"how can a 21 year old be a Mistress?" More curious would be to watch how the answers change when the sex in question is changed.

In general, I think male submissives are expected to have a greater degree of responsibility for their choices than female submissives. The double standard involved probably derives from antiquated expectations of masculinity and sexuality; an older male submissive who pursues a younger female dominant is (typically) seen as not having the same degree of power over her since her role as dominant trumps her status as a younger (read, weaker) female. Because male submissives are also (typically) expected to be more sex and fetish driven than their female counterparts, there's an unspoken belief that "if he gets screwed, he got what he deserves."

While this should go without saying, I'm only commenting on how I perceive the prevailing attitudes within our little world here.

Stephan

_____________________________

Nosce Te Ipsum

"The blade itself incites to violence" - Homer

Men: Find a Woman here

(in reply to amayos)

RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/30/2008 12:45:12 PM

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Joined: 6/2/2004
From: New England
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Stephann

In general, I think male submissives are expected to have a greater degree of responsibility for their choices than female submissives. The double standard involved probably derives from antiquated expectations of masculinity and sexuality; an older male submissive who pursues a younger female dominant is (typically) seen as not having the same degree of power over her since her role as dominant trumps her status as a younger (read, weaker) female. Because male submissives are also (typically) expected to be more sex and fetish driven than their female counterparts, there's an unspoken belief that "if he gets screwed, he got what he deserves."

While this should go without saying, I'm only commenting on how I perceive the prevailing attitudes within our little world here.

Well spake, Stephen.

(in reply to Stephann)

RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/30/2008 12:51:39 PM

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Joined: 11/14/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

Awww, that is so cute. I was somewhere around late middle/early high school when Episode I came out. I talked my mom into helping me make Amidala's parade dress, so we a found a pattern for a dress similar to the one in the movie and I lovingly tried to craft the decorations, including the fan thing she wore behind her. I even hand painted the symbols running down the front of her gown and did my best to make her petaled cape.

Yes... I am proud dork!

OH NO! A FEMALE STAR WARS DORK! STAY AWAY FROM MY HUSBAND!

I am the only female in a household of Star Wars dorks. Sitting on top of my computer monitor as we speak is a clone trooper. My guest bathroom is all pretty, except for the Star Wars light switch plate. 50% of my Ums underwear is Star Wars, and the other half is Transformers. My living room is littered with light sabres, and next week, I am going to be hosting a birthday party for my UM that is...you guessed it...Star Wars themed.

Oh- and on my fireplace mantle is Boba Fet. He's actually pretty cool though. He's made out of spark plugs and springs and scrap metal. He's about a foot tall. I bought him as an anniversary present for Cap'nspankins.

_____________________________

Wife/property of CapnSpankins...and loving every minute of it! Visit my juicy blog http://www.kinkycrafts.info/gorgeous-blog/gblog.php for updates on my slave training!

(in reply to AquaticSub)

RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/30/2008 2:01:52 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: amayos

quote:

ORIGINAL: Stephann

In general, I think male submissives are expected to have a greater degree of responsibility for their choices than female submissives. The double standard involved probably derives from antiquated expectations of masculinity and sexuality; an older male submissive who pursues a younger female dominant is (typically) seen as not having the same degree of power over her since her role as dominant trumps her status as a younger (read, weaker) female. Because male submissives are also (typically) expected to be more sex and fetish driven than their female counterparts, there's an unspoken belief that "if he gets screwed, he got what he deserves."

While this should go without saying, I'm only commenting on how I perceive the prevailing attitudes within our little world here.

Well spake, Stephen.

I agree. I don't believe that it should be this way, but probably close to the truth, regardless.

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to amayos)

RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/30/2008 2:09:42 PM

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Joined: 4/12/2006
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lol im far from wise!!!
hence why i am a woman :P

quote:

ORIGINAL: celticlord2112

quote:

just goes to show with age doesnt come wisdom

And the wisdom in this remark is....????

< Message edited by backseatbebe -- 1/30/2008 2:12:32 PM >

(in reply to celticlord2112)

RE: How can a 21 year old possibly be a Master? - 1/30/2008 2:34:07 PM

Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: gorgeous1

OH NO! A FEMALE STAR WARS DORK! STAY AWAY FROM MY HUSBAND! I am the only female in a household of Star Wars dorks. Sitting on top of my computer monitor as we speak is a clone trooper. My guest bathroom is all pretty, except for the Star Wars light switch plate. 50% of my Ums underwear is Star Wars, and the other half is Transformers. My living room is littered with light sabres, and next week, I am going to be hosting a birthday party for my UM that is...you guessed it...Star Wars themed.

Oh- and on my fireplace mantle is Boba Fet. He's actually pretty cool though. He's made out of spark plugs and springs and scrap metal. He's about a foot tall. I bought him as an anniversary present for Cap'nspankins.

Heehee.. I have the infamous sexy Leia figurine that I bought cause I think it's pretty. At some gift giving occasion Valyraen arranged to have some really nice armor made for my SWG character - I was so thrilled.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to gorgeous1)

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