Twicehappy2x
Posts: 1096
Joined: 3/27/2007
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Ialdabaoth
4 people who are exactly the body type and skills that I want, and into some of the same things I am, and kinky
* 20 or so people who are into the same things I am, and kinky, but I do not find them attractive.
* 5 people who are exactly the body type and skills that I want, and kinky, but not at ALL interested in the sort of things that I am.
* who knows how many hundreds of people who aren't into the skills that I want or kinky.
* who knows how many hundreds of people who I am not interested in for any reason.
I see you changed your profile a bit but still see very little vanilla interests, which are important. And almost zero about what you are offering a potential mate besides turning them into your kinky creation and using them to show off. Personally, if that was all somebody wanted me for, i buy them one of those silicone sex dolls and wish them a long life with it.
Not saying your wants/desires are wrong, just saying the ones who would be interested in that type of life are going to be far and few between, add on your personal physical attraction needs, and it becomes an even smaller pool.
I think you are looking wayyyyy to hard at the physical.
What happens when this female prima donna you want to build gets old and less flexible or gasp, gets wrinkles or osteoporosis?
Most women, while enjoying having their body appreciated want somebody who is more interested with what is on the inside.
I do understand looking for specifics, everybody has some. Mine was bikers only. Other than that i was pretty open to a wide range of physical/kink types. What attracts me about a person is who they are, how they present themselves. Yes, i was looking for the one who i knew was the One, but that was dependent on who they were, not a laundry list of i want.
Should you lower your standards? Only you know the answer to that. But i think you should be concerning yourself less with the "i want this now" and more with the long term if you hope to even begin to attract women from your very limited selection.
quote:
ORIGINAL: Ialdabaoth
I WANT property. I WANT committed submissives. I just don't want property that has to be paid for with "twue wuv". I don't want committed submissives that want to get married and have hundreds of my babies. I don't want people who want a "deep communion of souls". I want people who want to be owned, and used, and turned into works of art. I want people who want to be turned into a testament to my power and creativity. I'm just sick of all that "you're The One" crap. I want committed, mutually beneficial relationships based around having fun and doing stuff
Wow, i just read that last bit i underlined and while i grasp you want you want, all i can say is WOW! Again. You really do have no or little concept of how the most female minds function, do you?
Is it really only about filling your kink/getting laid? If so why not just occasionally pay a pro who suits you?
quote:
I'm asking for help or advice in how to choose differently. Does that make sense?
So, now it sinks in: I'm actually not worthy of what I want; there are plenty of much, much cooler people than me that want it, and not enough of it to go around, so of course they get it first.
Ok, i have been answering as i go along and i think i see the biggest issue a bit better now.
After reading all your posts, i have to ask, have you tried therapy to work on your relationship/trust issues?
Most importantly, you seriously need help with your self esteem issues. I commented earlier on your wanting this specific type female as a way to the ends of your being able to show off. From your profile;
"I've performed in front of crowds, drawn specifically to see what new madness I had taught my girls. I've made award-winning fetish clothing. I've walked down a crowded mall, filming my girl as she danced in ballet boots and a mini-skirt. I have looked into a thousand pairs of eyes and left a greater person for each of them."
It appears to me what you are jonesing for, what is driving you, as you put it "to a psychotic break" is lack of approval, lack of adulation, lack of being looked at and admired.
It seems you base a lot of your sense of self worth on what others think of you. Whether or not they admire what you've done. You do not even begin to appear to care what the female object of your desires thinks of you.
Hasn't anybody ever given you approval/loved you for who you are instead of what you have done/can do?
Get some serious psychiatric help. Nobody should have to base their worth on a crowds approval. You need to learn to approve of yourself, to place a value on yourself as a human being for who you are inside. Once you learn to do that, you might see a change in your "must haves".
< Message edited by Twicehappy2x -- 9/22/2008 5:45:45 AM >
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The human heart is not a finite container but an ever expanding universe with all the stars contained there in.
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RE: "Just lower your standards" - 
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