RE: Signalling you're a sub to a possible Domme

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RE: Signalling you're a sub to a possible Domme - 10/21/2008 9:14:52 AM

thelovebitch

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looks like none of you agree with my view. well that is exaclty how i think and its in me.

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RE: Signalling you're a sub to a possible Domme - 10/29/2008 4:00:27 PM

sensualslave28

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quote:

ORIGINAL: dreamerdreaming

Wear a triskelion necklace, bracelet, ring or T shirt. A tattoo would work too but then you couldn't take it off. Although you could cover it up... Even a triskelion design on a book cover or a patch on your backpack or a bumpersticker on your car, or a sticker on your bicycle or guitar case or laptop, etc. would do the trick.

When we see it, a triskelion would signal everyone in the know immediately, that you are kinky.

But we still wouldn't know whether you are dom or sub, slave or owner, top, bottom, switch, if you want your kink 24/7 or reserved for sex, etc.- or if you are even available. And you wouldn't know those things about us either, just by seeing it. That needs and deserves a conversation.

yes thats also what i suggest - its what i wear around myneck and really only the ones n the know will pick what it is - even if it is used for other things the fact that a potentialdomme will recognise it is enough IMO

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RE: Signalling you're a sub to a possible Domme - 10/29/2008 5:10:38 PM

PeonForHer

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I'm rapidly beginning to believe that things just aren't the same here in the UK, sensualslave. A lot of people, even those who regularly go to BDSM venues (like myself) just aren't up on these things. Even I had not heard of a triskelion before dreamerdreaming had mentioned it.

I've met women in the UK who very clearly have dominant tendencies without even being fully conscious that that's how their tendencies could be described - let alone registering that they're "dommes".

The cultural difference, even between English-speaking countries, seems to be vast.

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RE: Signalling you're a sub to a possible Domme - 10/29/2008 6:09:20 PM

MsStarlett

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I carry a handcuff key on my normal key ring to 'signal' that I'm kinky.

(Plus it was a gift from my best boy so it's also a constant reminder of him.)

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RE: Signalling you're a sub to a possible Domme - 10/30/2008 4:01:19 PM

stella41b

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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

I'm rapidly beginning to believe that things just aren't the same here in the UK, sensualslave. A lot of people, even those who regularly go to BDSM venues (like myself) just aren't up on these things. Even I had not heard of a triskelion before dreamerdreaming had mentioned it.

I wouldn't feel bad about that Peonforher, I've been interested in these things all my adult life and I didn't work out what a triskelion is until I started working on my play 'Switch' earlier this year. I've spent years in Poland working with expat Americans and after an extremely brief visit to Atlanta I'm inclined to agree that things are different on the other side of the Atlantic - a completely different mindset. From what I saw of Atlanta (which wasn't much) it struck me as being a bit like Birmingham but full of Americans.

quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

I've met women in the UK who very clearly have dominant tendencies without even being fully conscious that that's how their tendencies could be described - let alone registering that they're "dommes".

I agree, sometimes you can tell, but to me unless she's interested in having a relationship with you in which she is going to dominate you the way I see it she's no more than a woman and a human being. I think this is where the misunderstandings start, for she's looking for a person who accepts that she's a domme as part of her 'whole person', whereas some submissives go straight into the 'I'm a sub, you're a domme' mindset. This invariably leads to you ending up not with the domme you wish for, but the domme you deserve.

quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

The cultural difference, even between English-speaking countries, seems to be vast.

Too right. I've noticed that Little Britain is going out on television in the US, and I wonder if our American friends will get it too. But this is one of the reasons I love these boards, because you got all these different cultures coming together on a common theme.

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RE: Signalling you're a sub to a possible Domme - 10/30/2008 4:33:40 PM

Venatrix

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quote:

ORIGINAL: PeonForHer

I've met women in the UK who very clearly have dominant tendencies without even being fully conscious that that's how their tendencies could be described - let alone registering that they're "dommes".

But don't forget that being dominant in a vanilla sense is rarely a correlation for being dominant in a kinky sense.

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RE: Signalling you're a sub to a possible Domme - 10/30/2008 4:40:33 PM

PeonForHer

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Thanks, Stella.

From what I saw of Atlanta (which wasn't much) it struck me as being a bit like Birmingham but full of Americans.

I don't know quite what to say to that. Both Brummies and Americans are fine people, of course, and I won't hear it said otherwise. But that comment did crack me up!

I agree, sometimes you can tell, but to me unless she's interested in having a relationship with you in which she is going to dominate you the way I see it she's no more than a woman and a human being. I think this is where the misunderstandings start, for she's looking for a person who accepts that she's a domme as part of her 'whole person', whereas some submissives go straight into the 'I'm a sub, you're a domme' mindset. This invariably leads to you ending up not with the domme you wish for, but the domme you deserve.

Yes. There's a ton of things in there for me to think about. Actually, oddly enough, I've seen it more from UK dommes' point of view, recently. What I mean is, I've been hearing from dommes in the UK who've revealed that they're in the process of forming relationships - or hoping to form them - with subs who aren't reconciled to being subs. This seems to me to be a rocky road for them to take and I've told them so in various ways.

As for me and any future "partner who has a nascent domme streak" (want of a better phrase), well, if I end up in a relationship with one such, I'll just have to expect it to be a similarly rocky road. But the path towards true love never was nicely levelled and tarmaced anyway, as they say . . .

Too right. I've noticed that Little Britain is going out on television in the US, and I wonder if our American friends will get it too.

Hmm. Tastes can vary within cultures, too. I'm not a great fan of Little Britain. Some sketches have me in fits, but most are too harsh for me and I often don't like their 'targets'. I'd be surprised, frankly, if US viewers go for it. We'll see. But I do like to see English speakers from all over the world rubbing up against each other (all possible puns intended). It's interesting and often fun - I'll certainly agree on that.

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RE: Signalling you're a sub to a possible Domme - 10/30/2008 4:45:07 PM

PeonForHer

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But don't forget that being dominant in a vanilla sense is rarely a correlation for being dominant in a kinky sense.

Oh no, V. One or two experiences in the past have taught me that lesson well. The most socially-assertive woman I ever went out with was also the most submissive in the kinky sense. I won't make that mistake again.

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RE: Signalling you're a sub to a possible Domme - 10/30/2008 8:30:57 PM

MistressDommeDom

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I have to go with the collar idea. How could a Domme miss that?

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