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The Arrogance behind dominants - 1/3/2009 4:37:30 PM

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note in particular the lack of a capital D in the subject line.

Reading some current threads I am driven to ask the question; Why is it some people have to be so bloody superior?

To expand a little, I do not consider myself to be superior to Jaz, she gets a capital letter. Also, I use her given name in almost all situations, my choice, yours to make your own decision on what you call yours.

We are in no position to "tell" other dominants they are doing it wrong or have not earned the status as master.

In general we are talking about a relationship of sorts between two people on the terms THEY have agreed.

These forums are for questions and discussions. If you or I have something constructive and pertinent to add to a thread then we should, otherwise don't be arrogant or superior.

Steve.

< Message edited by SteveAndJaz -- 1/3/2009 4:38:03 PM >

RE: The Arrogance behind dominants - 1/3/2009 4:40:24 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: SteveAndJaz

note in particular the lack of a capital D in the subject line.

Reading some current threads I am driven to ask the question; Why is it some people have to be so bloody superior?

To expand a little, I do not consider myself to be superior to Jaz, she gets a capital letter. Also, I use her given name in almost all situations, my choice, yours to make your own decision on what you call yours.

We are in no position to "tell" other dominants they are doing it wrong or have not earned the status as master.

In general we are talking about a relationship of sorts between two people on the terms THEY have agreed.

These forums are for questions and discussions. If you or I have something constructive and pertinent to add to a thread then we should, otherwise don't be arrogant or superior.

Steve.

ANd the purpose behind this little tantrum was???????????????????

_____________________________

If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.

(in reply to SteveAndJaz)

RE: The Arrogance behind dominants - 1/3/2009 4:42:14 PM

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From: Apple County NY
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Some people enjoy speech restrictions. For those for whom it works, it's a good thing. For those it doesn't work for, it isn't. Any more questions?

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to IrishMist)

RE: The Arrogance behind dominants - 1/3/2009 4:46:49 PM

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Joined: 1/15/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: IrishMist

quote:

ORIGINAL: SteveAndJaz

note in particular the lack of a capital D in the subject line.

Reading some current threads I am driven to ask the question; Why is it some people have to be so bloody superior?

To expand a little, I do not consider myself to be superior to Jaz, she gets a capital letter. Also, I use her given name in almost all situations, my choice, yours to make your own decision on what you call yours.

We are in no position to "tell" other dominants they are doing it wrong or have not earned the status as master.

In general we are talking about a relationship of sorts between two people on the terms THEY have agreed.

These forums are for questions and discussions. If you or I have something constructive and pertinent to add to a thread then we should, otherwise don't be arrogant or superior.

Steve.

ANd the purpose behind this little tantrum was???????????????????

Arrogance?

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to IrishMist)

RE: The Arrogance behind dominants - 1/3/2009 4:47:18 PM

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Joined: 5/10/2007
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I don't consider myself qualified to grant, or rescind, the title of "Master." I do, however, consider myself qualified upon occasion to grant someone the title of "Lacking Common Sense." In fact, I'm tempted to do that right now, because someone seems to think that giving advice to people who didn't ask for it has any chance of changing their behavior. It's rare enough that someone changes behavior even AFTER asking for advice, either online or in real.

Capital letters are good. Yessiree.

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to IrishMist)

RE: The Arrogance behind dominants - 1/3/2009 4:47:52 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

quote:

ORIGINAL: IrishMist

quote:

ORIGINAL: SteveAndJaz

note in particular the lack of a capital D in the subject line.

Reading some current threads I am driven to ask the question; Why is it some people have to be so bloody superior?

To expand a little, I do not consider myself to be superior to Jaz, she gets a capital letter. Also, I use her given name in almost all situations, my choice, yours to make your own decision on what you call yours.

We are in no position to "tell" other dominants they are doing it wrong or have not earned the status as master.

In general we are talking about a relationship of sorts between two people on the terms THEY have agreed.

These forums are for questions and discussions. If you or I have something constructive and pertinent to add to a thread then we should, otherwise don't be arrogant or superior.

Steve.

ANd the purpose behind this little tantrum was???????????????????

Arrogance?

LMFAO

Sounds as good as any other suggestion; I'll roll with it

_____________________________

If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.

(in reply to LaTigresse)

RE: The Arrogance behind dominants - 1/3/2009 4:52:50 PM

StayOfExecution

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Joined: 8/25/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: SteveAndJaz

Why is it some people have to be so bloody superior?

We are in no position to "tell" other dominants they are doing it wrong or have not earned the status as master.

Steve.

Maybe you should just address the person directly, instead of lecturing all dominants.

Just a suggestion.

_____________________________

I'm not the gambling kind. And you look like a risk.

(in reply to SteveAndJaz)

RE: The Arrogance behind dominants - 1/3/2009 5:02:12 PM

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Status: offline

I'm amazed how sensitive some are to this thread subject.... get a grip, its a question not a criticism of any individual. People posting questions here are asking about their kink, they are not asking for an appraisal of there sanity or right to do something.

When you look at the number of people who visit this site compared to the few who are brave enough to post here it is a worry. Why do you think there are relatively so few? Because we are so nasty to them? Our superiority is potentially the root problem.

Superiority to what? These are sexual games we play (I hear you shout about how your games are not games) and yours is no more valid as the next persons so long as it is ticking the right boxes then play on.

Steve

(in reply to IrishMist)

RE: The Arrogance behind dominants - 1/3/2009 5:05:16 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: SteveAndJaz

I'm amazed how sensitive some are to this thread subject.... get a grip, its a question not a criticism of any individual. People posting questions here are asking about their kink, they are not asking for an appraisal of there sanity or right to do something.

When you look at the number of people who visit this site compared to the few who are brave enough to post here it is a worry. Why do you think there are relatively so few? Because we are so nasty to them? Our superiority is potentially the root problem.

Superiority to what? These are sexual games we play (I hear you shout about how your games are not games) and yours is no more valid as the next persons so long as it is ticking the right boxes then play on.

Steve

NO NO NO

It's because I am so nasty to them. For the sake of all concerned, get it fucking right.

My ego knows no bounds

_____________________________

If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.

(in reply to SteveAndJaz)

RE: The Arrogance behind dominants - 1/3/2009 5:10:16 PM

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quote:

Why is it some people have to be so bloody superior?

this has nothing to do with the lifestyle......some people are just like that.

(in reply to IrishMist)

RE: The Arrogance behind dominants - 1/3/2009 5:11:38 PM

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Joined: 4/15/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: SteveAndJaz

I'm amazed how sensitive some are to this thread subject.... get a grip, its a question not a criticism of any individual. People posting questions here are asking about their kink, they are not asking for an appraisal of there sanity or right to do something.

When you look at the number of people who visit this site compared to the few who are brave enough to post here it is a worry. Why do you think there are relatively so few? Because we are so nasty to them? Our superiority is potentially the root problem.

Superiority to what? These are sexual games we play (I hear you shout about how your games are not games) and yours is no more valid as the next persons so long as it is ticking the right boxes then play on.

Steve

Steve,

there is a great big line of demarcation tween the posting crown and the chat room crowd. that may be your variance.
I am fairly well know on the boards but in a chat room it is "how dare you invade our space"

CP

(in reply to SteveAndJaz)

RE: The Arrogance behind dominants - 1/3/2009 5:14:59 PM

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From: Atlanta
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Some people are just collar popping amazing wherever they go.

The "what made your eyes roll" thread is full of examples.

_____________________________

HBIC

(in reply to CelticPrince)

RE: The Arrogance behind dominants - 1/3/2009 5:17:38 PM

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Joined: 6/29/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SteveAndJaz
note in particular the lack of a capital D in the subject line.

To expand a little, I do not consider myself to be superior to Jaz, she gets a capital letter. Also, I use her given name in almost all situations, my choice, yours to make your own decision on what you call yours.

We are in no position to "tell" other dominants they are doing it wrong or have not earned the status as master.

Not sure I understand what it is you are referring to here.

The only behavior you have made reference to is the penchant many of us have for a certain fetish involving capitalization or for titles and/or pet names. Since these are commonly accepted parlance both here in the CM forums and elsewhere, it seems a bit self-righteous (dare I say "arrogant") of you to criticize it, especially in such an ambiguous manner.

As for who is in what position to "tell" others anything at all, well, those who ask for opinions should not them be shocked when others voice them in response. The question of 'status' and titles, earned or no, is simply a favorite topic of discussion for many here and one that is likely to continue to come up no matter how much you rail against it. It is generally accepted by most of us here that our personal preferences in that regard are just that - personal preferences - and not to be taken as gospel.

Perhaps it would make for a more enlightening discussion if you would kindly disambiguate your query for us.

_____________________________

Use your head can't you use your head? You're on Earth! There's no cure for that! - Samuel Beckett (Endgame)

(in reply to SteveAndJaz)

RE: The Arrogance behind dominants - 1/3/2009 5:19:27 PM

StayOfExecution

Posts: 40
Joined: 8/25/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SteveAndJaz

I'm amazed how sensitive some are to this thread subject.... get a grip, its a question not a criticism of any individual. People posting questions here are asking about their kink, they are not asking for an appraisal of there sanity or right to do something.

When you look at the number of people who visit this site compared to the few who are brave enough to post here it is a worry. Why do you think there are relatively so few? Because we are so nasty to them? Our superiority is potentially the root problem.

Superiority to what? These are sexual games we play (I hear you shout about how your games are not games) and yours is no more valid as the next persons so long as it is ticking the right boxes then play on.

Steve

For some people, this encompasses more than "sexual games". But I agree when you say that no one's way is more valid than another's.

However, you contradict yourself when you talk about being "amazed" at the "sensitivity" of the respondants to your topic, while preaching about being kinder to those who are scared to post. Why aren't you equally amazed at the sensitivity of those who aren't "brave" enough to post?

You're (generic) going to hear it all out here. Some will be harsh, some will be kind, some will be neutral. If a person doesn't feel mentally strong enough to put something on a message board and hear the responses without feeling personally invalidated, maybe they aren't sound enough to dominate someone.

_____________________________

I'm not the gambling kind. And you look like a risk.

(in reply to SteveAndJaz)

RE: The Arrogance behind dominants - 1/3/2009 5:20:48 PM

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I dunno..I kinda get off on Master's arrogance and superiority

< Message edited by littlewonder -- 1/3/2009 5:21:30 PM >

(in reply to Maxwell67)

RE: The Arrogance behind dominants - 1/3/2009 5:23:38 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

I dunno..I kinda get off on Master's arrogance and superiority

Generally speaking but........it is pretty hot, isn't it? when they go all superior and arrogant

Yummmmy

_____________________________

If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.

(in reply to littlewonder)

RE: The Arrogance behind dominants - 1/3/2009 5:23:55 PM

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Steve. Some "games" are more valid than others. I've had two female friends call me in the last 72 hours because they just broke up with their boyfriends. Both told me about all the red flags they could see in hindsight. Well, I saw them ahead of time -- and plenty of people who post here could have, too. Some people really are better able to predict the future than others.

Also, your concern is not scientific. Please produce any free message board on any subject where the posting rate is greater than 5% of the lurk rate. You are complaining about a dynamic that is endemic to the internet, and has nothing to do with BDSM or the personalities of the regular CM posters.

That said, I have noooooo problem getting into it with someone when I think they are talking down to someone else. You may have noticed that yourself. But I make pointed statements, directed to the person's comments. I don't start a thread, and I don't use arguments that hold no water.

I hope both of you have a very happy new year.

_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to CelticPrince)

RE: The Arrogance behind dominants - 1/3/2009 5:31:01 PM

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Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SteveAndJaz

When you look at the number of people who visit this site compared to the few who are brave enough to post here it is a worry. Why do you think there are relatively so few? Because we are so nasty to them? Our superiority is potentially the root problem.

Superiority to what? These are sexual games we play (I hear you shout about how your games are not games) and yours is no more valid as the next persons so long as it is ticking the right boxes then play on.

Steve

Ranting about arrogant and superior doms while being arrogant, superior is a great way to ruin your credibility.

_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."

(in reply to SteveAndJaz)

RE: The Arrogance behind dominants - 1/3/2009 5:45:01 PM

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Ok I need to be clearer

There is nothing scientific in this, its about perceptions. I think the majority would accept that discussion can be heated and often fraught with tension as people frustratingly try to get there point across.
There are many good posters on this site, there are many sound pieces of advise as well as well thought out opinions.
This thread is more about those that routinely answer posted questions with criticisms, arrogance and generally belittling the fact that the op dared to ask such a naive question. Should we be concerned that these people group together and clearly try to bully the person concerned?
I am well aware that this goes on in every forum group from politics to the womens institute but does that make it acceptable?

Does the anonymity of an online forum encourage us to be more aggressive than we would be in a face to face situation?

(in reply to RedMagic1)

RE: The Arrogance behind dominants - 1/3/2009 5:47:40 PM

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From: Pennsylvania
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It's like raaiiinn...

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“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”
- Albert Einstein

(in reply to SteveAndJaz)

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