RE: Would you give up your career for submission?

Join Our Community

Collarchat.com

Home Login Search

RE: Would you give up your career for submission?

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Would you give up your career for submission?

Page: << < prev 4 5 6 7 [8]

Login

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: Would you give up your career for submission? - 12/26/2007 2:08:56 PM

Posts: 3292
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Leatherist
Have you considered some work you can do from home as well?

Yes. The best situation would be to consult for the company I worked for. I was the subject matter expert (SME) in my area and while the position of manager was no longer needed in that area, the knowledge I have about the business is significant.

Time will tell what will happen. Since things seem to work out for us in the end, I do not worry about the future. At the moment I have almost no debt and sufficient money invested to support myself for a time. Part of making this move happen was getting me in a financial position to make it. The biggest reason for having me go back to work in a few months is to put away money for early retirement.

Knight's Kyra

_____________________________

"Passion... it lies in all of us. Sleeping, waiting, and though unbidden, it will stir, open its jaws, and howl. It speaks to us, guides us... passion rules us all. And we obey..." ~Angelus

(in reply to Leatherist)

RE: Would you give up your career for submission? - 12/26/2007 2:09:34 PM

Posts: 6577
Joined: 5/5/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: kyraofMists

quote:

ORIGINAL: kyraofMists

quote:

Are you willing to give up (or pause) your career in order to be in a service position full time?

Yes, provided that it did not harm my well-being.

Well, 17 months later, I put my money where my mouth was. I quit my career, packed up or donated the things that I have and moved over 3,700 miles to serve. For the next couple of months I will be without a job while he and Alandra work. It is highly unlikely that any job I get in the near future will be a career. They will be a means to an end; their purpose is to make enough money for retirement in the event the funds are needed.

Knight's Kyra

Congrats to you and all three of you kyra!

_____________________________

I cannot be defined by moments in my life, but must be considered for by the entirety of my existence.

When you fail to consider that I am the best judge for what is right for me, all of your opinions become suspect to me.

(in reply to kyraofMists)

RE: Would you give up your career for submission? - 12/26/2007 2:12:44 PM

Posts: 133
Joined: 5/5/2007
From: Memphis
Status: offline

Are you willing to give up (or pause) your career in order to be in a service position full time? I have to assume that Mistress is in a position financially for such a situation. If I was collard my answer would be yes of course I would if it pleased her and if it was her will for me to do so.

If so, are you worried about your earning potential should you ever have to return to work? I would be concerned but I know certain skills I have will always be needed so I would feel comfortable in knowing that I could work again for much less money than I make today. However working ones way back up the ladder isn't that hard the 3rd or 4th time around.

Do you worry about not being able to accumulate skills in your field? I would worry about times changing and technology changing. Falling behind that 8 ball is difficult to get around.

Do you worry about feeling any lack of self worth if your duties are strictly related to homemaking, housecleaning, or taking care of errands (again -- aimed toward men: I enjoy having a career and I enjoy cleaning and cooking just as much. I would not feel a lack of self worth actually I would feel valued because that kind of service is directly related to pleasing Mistress. It would allow me to concentrate solely on her, her needs and wants. It would be actually rewarding to me.

Do you feel emasculated when your male friends have jobs/careers and you do not?How do you address that)? Well my male friends all ready rack me over the coals for my lifestyle so I know they would have a hoot with that one. I would feel emasculated but not because of my male friends. Handling it would be actually easy because my happiness from being that free within my submission would be glowing in there dull, uptight, non-eventful lives. They would actually envy me once they stopped with the male B.S.

For sub men that have a career/job right now, would you be willing to give it up -- for good -- in order to be a stay at home submissive for the long term? I would miss my career as my job helps define who I am. However, I feel that finding the right Mistress who I can serve the best is like finding a soul mate. Having that Mistress I would give my career up without second thought. That kind of submission is one of a kind and doesn't get offered to much if at all in our lives especially to male slaves. So to me that would be an honor and an easy decision for me to make.

Would you be bored? Bored?? hmmm No, maybe with the cleaning a little but the cooking. No I could really get into that, finding new dishes, new ways of presenting it for meals. Decorating the house and just adding those special touches that make all the differences in the world. I wouldn't get bored I would get creative!

Interesint Post...

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

RE: Would you give up your career for submission? - 12/26/2007 2:25:03 PM

Posts: 11766
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Leatherist
Merc.
If you die tomorrow, is beth provided for?

No - because I won't be there. Similarly I would no longer be "provided for"if she died first. However, using my authority as her "Master", a condition of her "slavery" is that she may NOT die before me.

Financially though - she'll be fine.

Leather, you think these notions are "romantic". Sure there are many "romantic" aspects of our life but there is MUCH more pragmatism; more than can be gleaned from our posts regarding isolated aspects of our relationship. beth's thoughts on this subject are posted on page 4 of this thread. They were made nearly 2 years ago. If you have a chance take a look at her perspective.

At the point of my life when I met beth I had no expectation of finding a person who would meet that, and my other expectations. I accept being the beneficiary of a life grander than any fantasy. beth surrendering her "career" is but one aspect of the total package; but the total package could not have become reality without it.

Yes it was my requirement for my slave to only serve one Master-me. I understood and assumed to take on all the responsibilities that went with that selfishness. To date, I've lived up to those responsibilities. Only my ultimate death will determine if beth is better or worse from the experience. Feel free should that occur and she's expressing her sorrow at her inability to then find an occupation or career that is worthy of her to post to that thread and say "I told you so!"

Until then, if you are ever in the neighborhood, we welcome you to meet us in person. You can judge by your own observation if either of us seem unhappy, or even worse for wear, as a result of the decisions we made.

(in reply to Leatherist)

RE: Would you give up your career for submission? - 12/26/2007 2:33:19 PM

Posts: 388
Joined: 1/1/2005
Status: offline

Well, I'm a male slave not a sub, but I would say yes, I would certainly consider it. It would have to be a situation were I was loved and taken care of. After all, women have been 'housewives' for years, not working, and expecting to be taken care of.

What I would expect is everything clearly spelled out. I would expect something to be put away for me in my own account, an allowance if you will. It would be in my name only and accessible at anytime by me. That is only fair, since I assume I would be taking care of my Superior and serving her.

If what I am doing is of value, I should be compensated to some degree for that value I provide her.

(in reply to AAkasha)

RE: Would you give up your career for submission? - 12/26/2007 2:40:36 PM

Posts: 1650
Joined: 9/24/2004
From: Connecticut
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: AAkasha
This is aimed toward male subs (as they are often seen as the breadwinners) but I'm interested to hear what female subs say as well.

Are you willing to give up (or pause) your career in order to be in a service position full time?

Personally I'm not willing to. I'm still young (I just turned 30 a couple of weeks ago), and have quite a lot of professional growth and movement to make. Not to mention I (and to some degree my mother) have invested in my career through having advanced and ivy league degrees. There's been some interesting articles mainly in the NYT that touch on the issue of women taking up spots at highly competitive ivy league universities to only waste that education by becoming stay at home mothers. If thats their goal in life thats absolutely fine and healthy, but I think its a waste to take up a spot that a hundred people would easily kill for and could do more with (in terms of impact on the world or their field).

quote:

If so, are you worried about your earning potential should you ever have to return to work?

I think earning potential is a valid concern, as well as ability to re-enter the same field with a comporable position. With the exception of some professions in the U.S. such as nursing, most are still fairly competitive and based on who you know. If you are out of the circuit for five or ten years, you probably won't know the right people. Hell you won't even know that the job positions are open. Not to mention, there is definitely an age bias in the work force in America, so I think its very difficult to continue where you left off professionally if you are ten years older, with no recent work history, and no compelling connections to the field.

Overall, I think if someone's older or not career focused (you can have a job and not be career focused), then I can see how it would be a much easier and even desirable decision to be a stay at home. But thats not where my mind is remotely at these days.

C~

_____________________________

"Just because you've always done it that way doesn't mean it's not incredibly stupid." -despair.com

~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
The heart of it all - http://www.wildfleurs.com
~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

(in reply to AAkasha)

RE: Would you give up your career for submission? - 12/26/2007 2:44:30 PM

Posts: 345
Joined: 7/11/2004
From: Colorado
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: trueshadow

Well, I'm a male slave not a sub, but I would say yes, I would certainly consider it. It would have to be a situation were I was loved and taken care of. After all, women have been 'housewives' for years, not working, and expecting to be taken care of.

What I would expect is everything clearly spelled out. I would expect something to be put away for me in my own account, an allowance if you will. It would be in my name only and accessible at anytime by me. That is only fair, since I assume I would be taking care of my Superior and serving her.

If what I am doing is of value, I should be compensated to some degree for that value I provide her.

"housewives" are few and far between in this day and age. Dual income families are more the norm. If you are looking for that.... to live with a woman who supports you and gives you an allowance to compensate you for the "service" you provide her, good luck with that. I have received similar offers many times. "I will never leave your home or dungeon. I will keep everything in order and clean. I will be there, naked and kneeling in a corner, awaiting your commands. I will be yours to use whenever you choose."

My response? No thank you. Get off your butt and work a job to help support the household. I'm not looking for a "sugar daddy", but refuse to be anyone's "sugar momma" either. I would be a fool to insist a submissive give up his career to be mine. I may insist he look for work in my area and relocate, however.

_____________________________

Knowledge and experience are wonderful things to share. When we stop asking questions, we might as well "hang it up".

check out: www.enclaveproductions.com
www.enclavewest.com

(in reply to trueshadow)

RE: Would you give up your career for submission? - 12/26/2007 2:45:19 PM

Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
Status: offline

Merc.

I am not trying to get on your case. You two seem some of the more practical and realistic ones here. I'm older, and I do not expect to live forever. My only point is this.. If you have someone who has no other means of support besides you-you both need to have some planning and preparation for unfortunate circumstances.

Personally-I would never be in an M/s relationship. The worry over my partner would frazzle my nerves raw. I'm only hammering this point home to people-and in general, not just to you.

So consider the last part I am going to say as a fast reply.

Don't call yourself a "responsible Master" if you do not care enough about your property to see that it can continue on without you. Don't count on the kindness of strangers to pick up the slack YOU should be taking care of NOW..None of us are immortal, and the wolf could take you at any moment.

_____________________________

My shop is currently segueing into production mode.

I'm not taking custom orders.

(in reply to Mercnbeth)

RE: Would you give up your career for submission? - 12/26/2007 3:02:58 PM

Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Leatherist

Don't call yourself a "responsible Master" if you do not care enough about your property to see that it can continue on without you. Don't count on the kindness of strangers to pick up the slack YOU should be taking care of NOW..None of us are immortal, and the wolf could take you at any moment.

Sometimes this means equipping the person to financially care for him/herself, rather than putting insurance money aside.

To answer the OP, yes, I would give up my career, but I am not allowed to. On the contrary, what he wants for me is to serve him by advancing my career. He enjoys watching me accomplish these things and doing well in school (another requirement). Plus, his insurance for me is not in a bank account. It's in preparing me - mentally, physically, emotionally, and intellectually - for a life without him, as he will likely go before me. So his purpose in this is twofold - to serve his pride and ego, and to be financially successful so that I won't have to rely on anyone else.

If for some reason he changed his plan, however, then I would follow the new plan.

(in reply to Leatherist)

RE: Would you give up your career for submission? - 12/26/2007 3:08:30 PM

sambamanslilgirl

Posts: 10926
Joined: 2/5/2007
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Leatherist

My only point is this.. If you have someone who has no other means of support besides you-you both need to have some planning and preparation for unfortunate circumstances.

my SO and i had a discussion about the "unexpected" recently. though both of us work, i discovered he doesn't have anything planned in case he should die first. this was quite alarming because of his age and our plans of getting married in Aug. however i do, all my wishes and plans as well as insurance policies/stocks (all from my UMs) are sealed in a fire-proof safe. we plan to keep the retirement funding separate but we're working on finding an insurance policy for him.

_____________________________

...2011 - year of the fabulous rock star life ...and i do it so well...

...announcing Mr. & Mrs. British Petrol ...yeah, marrying into oil is slick business...

(in reply to Leatherist)

RE: Would you give up your career for submission? - 12/26/2007 3:16:44 PM

Posts: 805
Joined: 4/7/2006
Status: offline

~fr~

If I was able to afford my family on a one person income and live the lifestyle that I am accustomed to and my partner as well. I wouldn't object to my partner giving up their career if that is something that they wanted to do.

But if I was in a long life relationship, then I'd expect the same rules that come with marriage. While I do believe there are some out there that are looking for a free ride. If I was in a power exchange relationship and my partner didn't work outside the home, doesn't necessarily means she isn't work. There is plenty of work that needs to be done inside the home or for the home.

Z-

_____________________________

"Flirting is part of the job description." DJ Jesus (Lucy Daughter Of The Devil)

Vanilla Official Music Page http://www.myspace.com/djzulu

(in reply to sambamanslilgirl)

RE: Would you give up your career for submission? - 12/26/2007 3:21:44 PM

Posts: 42
Joined: 12/15/2007
Status: offline

Depends, really. i am quite accustomed to pulling my weight and accepting responsibilities outside of the house. my reasoning behind that...i think it's important to be your own person...and to be able to stand on your own two feet should the need ever arise. Why should my Master have to carry the ball Himself? slaves aren't meant to be a burden financially or otherwise...so...unless He is wealthy and indicates otherwise...i would continue to work outside of the house. Let's face it....shackles and chains make for a terrific fantasy..but it isn't reality. Not having a social life of some sorts..isn't good.

_____________________________

"Life is not measured by the breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."

"Silence is GOLDEN, but duct tape is silver..."

(in reply to DarkDaddyZ)

RE: Would you give up your career for submission? - 12/26/2007 3:24:08 PM

Posts: 5149
Joined: 12/11/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkDaddyZ

~fr~

If I was able to afford my family on a one person income and live the lifestyle that I am accustomed to and my partner as well. I wouldn't object to my partner giving up their career if that is something that they wanted to do.

But if I was in a long life relationship, then I'd expect the same rules that come with marriage. While I do believe there are some out there that are looking for a free ride. If I was in a power exchange relationship and my partner didn't work outside the home, doesn't necessarily means she isn't work. There is plenty of work that needs to be done inside the home or for the home.

Z-

Or she could do a craft business, trade stocks, any number of useful money making things can be accomplished from a home with an office or equipped shop. Just cleaning a house and making dinner should not take all day to accomplish-unless you have very young children.

_____________________________

My shop is currently segueing into production mode.

I'm not taking custom orders.

(in reply to DarkDaddyZ)

RE: Would you give up your career for submission? - 12/26/2007 4:31:00 PM

Posts: 23574
Joined: 11/6/2005
From: Northern (yet still part of the South) Virginia
Status: offline

~ fast reply ~

Would you give up your career for submission?

Umm... no.

_____________________________

Founding Member, Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair-a's

Do not challenge me to a battle of wits & come to fight unarmed.

Are you really that stupid? ~ Bless your heart

13th doughnut

(in reply to AAkasha)

RE: Would you give up your career for submission? - 12/27/2007 10:14:25 AM

Posts: 24
Status: offline

Willing yes once the trust, respect and everything else sorted out, I have always been happiest being somewhat in the background and playing a more supporting role in my relationships. Career and material things have never really been high on my lists of priorties but that does not mean I want to stay at home full time but in a relationship if the lady wanted it then yes I would certainly give it serious consideration.

(in reply to Daddysredhead)

RE: Would you give up your career for submission? - 12/27/2007 2:03:00 PM

Posts: 656
Joined: 10/9/2007
Status: offline

i pretty much did, although my career wasn't one that i went to school for or anything...i pretty much gave up most of my previous life with the exception of family and most of my friends....Now the idea is for me to find something new, that i can learn from and that is maybe part time.

my career did have a ceiling though and although i could've continued with it for awhile, the ceiling was coming even if he hadn't enforced it.

_____________________________

Hugs,
cherry

Walking through life, and fear with a smile on my face.
Walking directly through the eye of the hurricane...and through to the other side..without fear....realizing everything will be okay. :)

being obedient 1day at a time

(in reply to AAkasha)

RE: Would you give up your career for submission? - 12/27/2007 5:30:02 PM

Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Mercnbeth
...... However, using my authority as her "Master", a condition of her "slavery" is that she may NOT die before me.

mmmmmmmmmm Could be rather problematic for you if Beth found herself in a immediate situation where she was dying... the poor girl would have to Kill you so she fulfills the requirement of not dying before you. Of course... I would suspect you have some order that she can't harm you or your property...so.. I hope she is never faced with this Shakespearian tragedy.

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to Mercnbeth)

Page: << < prev 4 5 6 7 [8]

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: Would you give up your career for submission?

Page: << < prev 4 5 6 7 [8]

Jump to:

New Messages	No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages	Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages	Locked w/o New Messages

Post New Thread

Reply to Message

Post New Poll

Submit Vote

Delete My Own Post

Delete My Own Thread

Rate Posts

Collarchat.com © 2024

Terms of Service

0.098