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Weight and Master/Dom control - 11/29/2010 7:30:50 AM

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Hi all. Ok, I'll probably be roasted for this but I would be very interested in you guys opinions.

I've read several Dom profiles and when I see one where they are grossly overweight (or don't give their weight), I question their control over themselves and I question putting myself in their control. Be it a valid theory or just shallow, I don't know.

I am not one to talk because I have about 40lbs I need to lose. But I lost 60lbs last year and it took alot of control just eating right and exercising. I don't judge people by their weight but I would question their self control. I obviously questioned my own.

thanks

RE: Weight and Master/Dom control - 11/29/2010 7:32:56 AM

LifestyleDominat

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I can understand your point though. The mentality of if they cannot see the potential of having a heart attack from there lack of weight control, how are they able to make quality decisions for yourself.

(in reply to anniezz338)

RE: Weight and Master/Dom control - 11/29/2010 7:36:15 AM

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Joined: 10/12/2007
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Wow... just... wow. People can be overweight due to lack of control... it can also be for other reasons. If you arent into portly men, then you have a good screening tool. Personal preferences are just that, personal. But to take your personal preferences and apply a broad criticism to others, without knowing the facts... is just wrong, in my opinion.

_____________________________

Telling me to take Midol wont help your butthurt.
RIP, my demon-child 5-16-11
Duchess of Dissent 1
Dont judge me because I sin differently than you.
If you want it sugar coated, dont ask me what i think! It would violate TOS.

(in reply to anniezz338)

RE: Weight and Master/Dom control - 11/29/2010 7:37:51 AM

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anniezz, valid point. I would extend this to other aspects as well - if he or she has a drinking or drug problem, etc.

That said, I do know of at least one person who is overweight but has medical issues causing it - and she states so in her profile.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to LifestyleDominat)

RE: Weight and Master/Dom control - 11/29/2010 7:45:18 AM

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Joined: 7/27/2010
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quote:

ORIGINAL: anniezz338

Hi all. Ok, I'll probably be roasted for this but I would be very interested in you guys opinions.

I've read several Dom profiles and when I see one where they are grossly overweight (or don't give their weight), I question their control over themselves and I question putting myself in their control. Be it a valid theory or just shallow, I don't know.

I am not one to talk because I have about 40lbs I need to lose. But I lost 60lbs last year and it took alot of control just eating right and exercising. I don't judge people by their weight but I would question their self control. I obviously questioned my own.

thanks

My theory is that different dominants will focus on their attention unevenly on issues based on what their personality is naturally set up to value the most.

So, for some being in control of other things may seem more important than what you're discussing.

It's a question of priorities, really.

People could tell me "You're not in control of X, Y, Z" and my response would be "Well, I care more about A, B, C".

I do see where you're coming from, though. My mind has a marked preference for people who care about their weight/nutrition for health reasons. At my age everyone is "hot", but I tend to never forget anyone, because I'm really loyal, so my mind is probably is trying to filter out those who're more likely to end up with visits to the Hospital, cause that is no fun, not at all.

(in reply to anniezz338)

RE: Weight and Master/Dom control - 11/29/2010 7:48:43 AM

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Oh goody, a fat thread. It's been ages...

(in reply to anniezz338)

RE: Weight and Master/Dom control - 11/29/2010 7:54:28 AM

Toppingfrmbottom

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I would not judge someone on their ability to control and dominate me based on their weight. Fat, thin, skinny, obtuse, it's all to me, unrelated to how well they can dominate and control me, that's more due to their personality and their views on life an who they are and such. Sure I wouldn't choose a fat dom if I wanted someone to dominate me into loosing weight, or guide me on that path, but if I wasn't looking for a pychically fit Dominant partner, to do fitness with, him being fat wouldn't bother me at all, up to a certain point, Daddy was 300 pounds or so when we met, and he still is, though he's working on loosing it, and gaining better health overall through martial arts, but I rathere enjoyed him being so chubby and still do. I'll be sorry to see him loose the weight if he does, but w/ill support him in being healthier, because that, is more important to me, than how cuddly and squishy he is right now.

_____________________________

One world under lube with vibrators and dildo's for all! quote from the sex toy 101 book

(in reply to BonesFromAsh)

RE: Weight and Master/Dom control - 11/29/2010 8:22:37 AM

SpiritedRadiance

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I gained 60 pounds due to a knee injury, I ate healthy hell reduced down to 900 calories a day.... i just couldnt move do the beyond painful reference... making child birth feel like period cramps painful just to walk 10 steps....

I AM healthy even though im overweight, I have great control over what i eat, I just happened to destroy all the tendons in my knee....

Moral of the story, If you dont like fat people dont like them... however dont try to make it an issue of lack of control to make yourself feel better or give yourself an excuse to dislike fat people... Own up to your preferences.

Like I will.. I hate judgmental cunts who assume about people Im fine with that statement I own up to that statement and stand by it... I dont try to justify why i dislike judgmental cunts who assume about people. I just dislike them, I dont need to try to make it a health issue or anything other then I dislike judgmental cunts.....

_____________________________

"Theres nothing in life like the feeling of cool leather sliding over your skin, the tears that fill your eyes as you realize someone else thinks you deserve it even if you havent reached that conclusion yet"- Forever to remember 11/5/11

(in reply to anniezz338)

RE: Weight and Master/Dom control - 11/29/2010 8:30:01 AM

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I'd like to note, my answer has nothing to do with body type.
For me, not managing my weight means LOSING weight I'm sure I'm not alone in that...

(in reply to SpiritedRadiance)

RE: Weight and Master/Dom control - 11/29/2010 8:35:07 AM

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The Medical associations attribute how much to lifestyle choices, and how much to uncontrolable medical issues? How many recent studies are there in the last 5 years on obesity? Yeah there are sometimes issues that cannot be controlled, but in a high percentage of the cases it is nutrition combined with activity.

quote:

ORIGINAL: tazzygirl

Wow... just... wow. People can be overweight due to lack of control... it can also be for other reasons. If you arent into portly men, then you have a good screening tool. Personal preferences are just that, personal. But to take your personal preferences and apply a broad criticism to others, without knowing the facts... is just wrong, in my opinion.

_____________________________

When speaking of slaves people always tend to ignore this definition "One who is abjectly subservient to a specified person or influence."

(in reply to tazzygirl)

RE: Weight and Master/Dom control - 11/29/2010 8:49:41 AM

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From: DC Metro area
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i would tend to agree...having a serious weight problem would signal a lack of self-control and discipline to me, which i don't view as a very Dominant quality. as DarkSteven said, the same would apply in other areas as well...from a drug problem to losing a job every few months.

(in reply to OrionTheWolf)

RE: Weight and Master/Dom control - 11/29/2010 9:55:00 AM

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I didn't see anywhere in her post that she said she found overweight people unattractive, but people read into it that she did?

I was 260 pounds, on a 5'4" frame. I was in shape and that shape was round. I've lost enough to be down to 188 (have not stepped on the scale since Thursday, do not intend to for another week!) and it was through self control that I got here. I'm also not done. I also look at someone's weight as a possible indicator of self control, but not in a snarky or rude way. Hell I was there myself, so it's more that I've been there and know the difficulty. As a "fat chick" i remember being invisible to the world. No one held doors, said good morning, or treated me like a woman. I will never do that to someone else.

That being said, I date chubby guys, skinny guys, younger guys, older guys, really any guy that shows a personality, sense of humor, intelligence, and some self control in other areas like...finances, interpersonal relationships, ambition, taking responsibility for their actions even if it's saying "Yup, I'm chubby, I just haven't what to do about it yet or if I want to" or something like that.

So yeah, it's a sign, but it's not the only one or the deciding factor in any way. Not to me.

(in reply to anniezz338)

RE: Weight and Master/Dom control - 11/29/2010 10:39:12 AM

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Suze Orman correctly predicted Biggest Loser winners based on their credit scores. Her theory was that people who had their credit under control had the aptitude/discipline for getting their weight under control. All the Biggest Loser contestants come in with medical issues and they all had bad eating and lifestyle habits before Jillian and Bob got their hands on them.

While it's true that physical health is only one of many factors upon which one can focus, IMO, it's a pretty big one. I'd rather hang out with someone who choses to spend time at the gym or otherwise being active then in front of the TV or computer. My own yoga practice has suffered since I discovered collarchat and I'd be motivated by someone who has self discipline and would not find credible someone who does not.

And from a purely selfish point of view, my sessions with an overweight Dom lasted 45 minutes while those with my regular, in shape play mate who goes to the gym regularly, last 3-4 hours.

(in reply to anniezz338)

RE: Weight and Master/Dom control - 11/29/2010 10:46:39 AM

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From: Newcastle, Australia
Status: offline

At the risk of starting another shit-storm, I'm not attracted to what's politely termed "BBW" and since the fella in the mirror requires me to set acceptable standards of behaviour by example for my submissive, I do what doesn't come naturally and keep myself in shape *first*.

So when I plant the girl's naked butt on the scales, it just won't do to have her reasonably thinking that maybe I need a turn, as well....

Yeah, I'm shallow that way and for the BBW nazis out there, I already know there are some things you're not supposed to express publically - bite away...!

Focus.

_____________________________

Never underestimate the persuasive power of stupid people in large groups. <unknown>

Your food is for eating, not torturing. <my mum> (Errm, when I was a kid)

(in reply to LilMichele)

RE: Weight and Master/Dom control - 11/29/2010 11:21:28 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Focus50

At the risk of starting another shit-storm, I'm not attracted to what's politely termed "BBW" and since the fella in the mirror requires me to set acceptable standards of behaviour by example for my submissive, I do what doesn't come naturally and keep myself in shape *first*.

So when I plant the girl's naked butt on the scales, it just won't do to have her reasonably thinking that maybe I need a turn, as well....

Yeah, I'm shallow that way and for the BBW nazis out there, I already know there are some things you're not supposed to express publically - bite away...!

Focus.

As hard as it may be to understand, Focus, i have no issue with what you stated. We all have preferences. Viva la difference and all that.

_____________________________

Telling me to take Midol wont help your butthurt.
RIP, my demon-child 5-16-11
Duchess of Dissent 1
Dont judge me because I sin differently than you.
If you want it sugar coated, dont ask me what i think! It would violate TOS.

(in reply to Focus50)

RE: Weight and Master/Dom control - 11/29/2010 11:30:32 AM

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Joined: 10/12/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: OrionTheWolf

The Medical associations attribute how much to lifestyle choices, and how much to uncontrolable medical issues? How many recent studies are there in the last 5 years on obesity? Yeah there are sometimes issues that cannot be controlled, but in a high percentage of the cases it is nutrition combined with activity.

quote:

ORIGINAL: tazzygirl

Wow... just... wow. People can be overweight due to lack of control... it can also be for other reasons. If you arent into portly men, then you have a good screening tool. Personal preferences are just that, personal. But to take your personal preferences and apply a broad criticism to others, without knowing the facts... is just wrong, in my opinion.

From webMD

Other things influence your weight and whether you are physically active, including:

Low self-esteem. Being overweight or obese may lower your self-esteem and lead to eating as a way to comfort yourself. Repeated failure at dieting also can affect your self-esteem and make it even harder to lose weight.
Emotional concerns. Emotional stress, anxiety, or illnesses such as depression or chronic pain can lead to overeating. Some people eat to calm themselves, to avoid dealing with unpleasant tasks or situations, or to dampen negative emotions.
Trauma. Distressing events, such as childhood sexual, physical, or emotional abuse; loss of a parent during childhood; or marital or family problems, can contribute to overeating.
Alcohol. Alcohol (beer and mixed drinks) is very high in calories.
Medicines or medical conditions. Some medical conditions and medicines may also cause weight gain. Examples include having Cushing's syndrome or hypothyroidism or taking certain antidepressants or corticosteroids.
http://www.webmd.com/diet/tc/obesity-cause

Causes of Obesity:
The following medical conditions are some of the possible causes of Obesity. There are likely to be other possible causes, so ask your doctor about your symptoms.

•Middle age spread
•Reduced metabolic rate
•Pituitary gland disease
•Pituitary gland tumor
•Pituitary gland cancer
•Underactive thyroid gland
•Prader-Willi syndrome
•Syndrome X
•Stein-Leventhal syndrome
•Frohlich syndrome
•Laurence-Moon-Biedl syndrome
•Some brain tumors
•Familial obesity
•Craniopharyngioma
•Pseudohypoparathyroidism
•Chromophobe adenoma
•Comfort eating (see Overeating)
•Reactive hypoglycemia (type of Hypoglycemia) - overeating occurs to avoid going "down" into a hypoglycemic attack.
•Hypothalamus tumor
•Brain injury
•Overeating - see causes of overeating
•Third ventricle tumor
•more causes...» listed here........

http://www.wrongdiagnosis.com/symptoms/obesity/causes.htm

Read more at http://www.wrongdiagnosis.com/sym/obesity.htm?ktrack=kcplink

Attributing it to simply more intake than output is correct, in a simplistic, easy-to-judge manner. But thats not the whole story. A world wide industry has been built around the assumption that if people simply moved more, and ate less, than the problem would be corrected. If that were the case, the total number of people who are obese would dramatically decline.

The above list is 236 conditions that have been shown to lead to weight gain. Might be worth a read. I never said obesity cannot be attributed to intake vs output. But to judge everyone with that view point is wrong.

_____________________________

Telling me to take Midol wont help your butthurt.
RIP, my demon-child 5-16-11
Duchess of Dissent 1
Dont judge me because I sin differently than you.
If you want it sugar coated, dont ask me what i think! It would violate TOS.

(in reply to OrionTheWolf)

RE: Weight and Master/Dom control - 11/29/2010 11:40:11 AM

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Joined: 8/8/2010
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quote:

A world wide industry has been built around the assumption that if people simply moved more, and ate less, than the problem would be corrected.

Actually, the industry is based around take this magic pill, or other product. No one makes money on "move more, eat less."

(in reply to tazzygirl)

RE: Weight and Master/Dom control - 11/29/2010 11:44:21 AM

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Joined: 10/12/2007
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Not everyone can "move more", not everyone will benefit from "moving more" or from "eating less".

_____________________________

Telling me to take Midol wont help your butthurt.
RIP, my demon-child 5-16-11
Duchess of Dissent 1
Dont judge me because I sin differently than you.
If you want it sugar coated, dont ask me what i think! It would violate TOS.

(in reply to kalikshama)

RE: Weight and Master/Dom control - 11/29/2010 11:46:33 AM

Posts: 3939
Status: offline

quote:

My theory is that different dominants will focus on their attention unevenly on issues based on what their personality is naturally set up to value the most.

So, for some being in control of other things may seem more important than what you're discussing.

It's a question of priorities, really.

People could tell me "You're not in control of X, Y, Z" and my response would be "Well, I care more about A, B, C".

I agree. I mean are you really going to tell the guy who's fat because he grew up in the projects, became an entrepreneur, and now uses his multi-million dollar bank account to eat filet mignon whenever he damn well feels like it that he's not in control of his life?

(in reply to Twoshoes)

RE: Weight and Master/Dom control - 11/29/2010 11:49:05 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: BonesFromAsh

Oh goody, a fat thread. It's been ages...

yep, was about time

just when you thought that with sitting in uni tonight life can't get any more boring

_____________________________

RIP 08-09-07

The PAST is history, the FUTURE a mystery, NOW is a gift - that's why it's called the PRESENT

www.butyoudontlooksick.com/navigation/BYDLS-TheSpoonTheory.pdf

(in reply to BonesFromAsh)

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