RE: What dominant women endure online - a halfway clueless male's perspective

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RE: What dominant women endure online - a halfway cluel... - 8/6/2011 10:55:46 AM

TonyB79

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Boo hoo... we get lots of emails. Quit whining, ladies, and sit back and enjoy the attention. ;-)

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RE: What dominant women endure online - a halfway cluel... - 8/6/2011 11:39:28 AM

LadyConstanze

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quote:

ORIGINAL: TonyB79

Boo hoo... we get lots of emails. Quit whining, ladies, and sit back and enjoy the attention. ;-)

Thanks, you can have some of the "do me emails" - instead of deleting them, shall I just forward them to you? Might be a surprise to you, but lots of emails and attention isn't really what women want, it's the equivalent of emptying your mailbox of lot lots of advertising spam, luckily most online mailboxes do have a spam filter...

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RE: What dominant women endure online - a halfway cluel... - 8/6/2011 11:49:15 AM

Epytropos

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This is me giving a fuck. If you don't want to read emails or you find them offensive (which incidentally I've never been convinced is a real emotion people feel and not a power play ie 'I can try to force the world to conform to my desires by pretending doing otherwise is an affront to dignity') or your time is too valuable to engage with the proletariat, don't. I get do-me messages too, and I either ignore them or send back a message to the effect of "That's hardly a respectful way to approach a dom" and move on with my life. I get that a fuck-ton of those could get old, but it's hardly an assault on your mind. Hell, for that matter you could simply mark your profile as un-searchable and then the only people who could message you would be people you messaged first. Problem solved.

Also how have you only gotten 25 full views in 18 months? If I don't get 25 a month I start to wonder if I'm losing my touch. Must be my forum presence, I guess?

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RE: What dominant women endure online - a halfway cluel... - 8/6/2011 12:02:10 PM

Tantriqu

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you've missed the point entirely.
Imagine your adult daughter is on here. Now imagine strange men are now e-mailing her very specific rape- and death-threats based on her profile info. Do you think she should 'quit whining' and enjoy that 'attention'?
Too bad you can't download empathy, dude, 'cuz you need an emergency patch.

quote:

ORIGINAL: TonyB79

Boo hoo... we get lots of emails. Quit whining, ladies, and sit back and enjoy the attention. ;-)

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RE: What dominant women endure online - a halfway cluel... - 8/6/2011 12:07:01 PM

Lockit

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I tend to enjoy the company of people I really enjoy, not some guy that emails with a fantasy. Do strong dominant women need the attention of idiots so much that we would enjoy it? I think not.

Boo hoo boy... get a clue. You really don't get how clueless that was.

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RE: What dominant women endure online - a halfway cluel... - 8/6/2011 12:27:02 PM

LadyConstanze

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Epytropos

This is me giving a fuck. If you don't want to read emails or you find them offensive (which incidentally I've never been convinced is a real emotion people feel and not a power play ie 'I can try to force the world to conform to my desires by pretending doing otherwise is an affront to dignity') or your time is too valuable to engage with the proletariat, don't. I get do-me messages too, and I either ignore them or send back a message to the effect of "That's hardly a respectful way to approach a dom" and move on with my life. I get that a fuck-ton of those could get old, but it's hardly an assault on your mind. Hell, for that matter you could simply mark your profile as un-searchable and then the only people who could message you would be people you messaged first. Problem solved.

Also how have you only gotten 25 full views in 18 months? If I don't get 25 a month I start to wonder if I'm losing my touch. Must be my forum presence, I guess?

Well, since you aren't convinced that being offended is not a real emotion we're all not entitled to our feelings? How is that going to work? Magic switch you pull for all of us? If you don't feel offended if you get some damned horrible mails, good for you, some of us just might not like to be assaulted with the sexual fantasies of strangers, so your solution is to put the profile into hiding and not get any mails instead of having the reasonable expectation that people treat you like a human being and not some piece of meat that is there to fulfill their fantasies? Great solution.... Isn't that like telling a woman if you don't want to have your butt pinched in public transportation, you better not leave the house or make sure you only take a car? One would think that it is a reasonable expectation to be treated with some basic respect, but again, that's just me...

Oh and congratulations on being one of those super rare males who get as much mail as women...

As for the profile views, not a clue how many of them I have, can't be honestly arsed to check who views my profile, and I don't really know why I should worry about having a certain number or less? As I said, couldn't even tell you how many people do view. What is there to worry about if it's less? Like no random strangers clicked on the profile and feeling a sense of loss?

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RE: What dominant women endure online - a halfway cluel... - 8/6/2011 12:28:13 PM

Killerangel

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quote:

ORIGINAL: TonyB79

Boo hoo... we get lots of emails. Quit whining, ladies, and sit back and enjoy the attention. ;-)

I see...you came into the Mistress forum and dismissed everything the women have said here as whining. How intelligent of you...high five! Not only that, but the women who have taken pains to explain and discuss something which you should obviously take notice of, are supposed to just turn around how they genuinely feel and embrace this negative attention because you, TonyB79, say so?

I can just see how this patronizing attitude must be netting you tons of women- you do have tons of women right? I'm sure you also know that people can access your forum posts by pushing a button on your profile and if I saw that bit of drivel that you posted you'd be dead in the water as far as chances with me. I cannot stand being patted on the head and being told it's not all that bad, gosh, just look at it differently. But thanks for posting such a valid example to the discussion of what Dominant women endure online!

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RE: What dominant women endure online - a halfway cluel... - 8/6/2011 12:30:01 PM

TonyB79

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Who said anything about rape and/or death threats? Most of the complaining on here has been about one-line responses, the sheer volume of replies, and the (charmingly named) "do-me" emails. Of course I'd be upset if my daughter was getting crude messages from skeazy dudes, but that would be mitigated somewhat by my knowledge that she's put her profile up on a FETISH site. It's not like people come on here to drink tea and eat crumpets, folks.

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RE: What dominant women endure online - a halfway cluel... - 8/6/2011 12:34:14 PM

Lockit

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Oh fuck tony.... seriously? Because we are on a site LIKE THIS?

Dude... I am not going to bother educating you. But when you land in the shit... know it was because YOU, were on a site LIKE THIS mouthing off like THAT! ROFL!

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RE: What dominant women endure online - a halfway cluel... - 8/6/2011 12:36:10 PM

TonyB79

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And also... "assaulted by the sexual fantasies of strangers"? Again, you're on a *fetish* site. You're soliciting those kinds of messages by - oh, I don't know - posting a pic of yourself crawling around on the floor in a catsuit, just to use one example. You were expecting Lord Byron?

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RE: What dominant women endure online - a halfway cluel... - 8/6/2011 12:39:54 PM

BonesFromAsh

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Seriously, Ladies, aren't you all above feeding the likes of a noob who uses this opportunity to make his first foray into the forums...and in such a "pleasant" manner?

< Message edited by BonesFromAsh -- 8/6/2011 12:40:24 PM >

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RE: What dominant women endure online - a halfway cluel... - 8/6/2011 12:41:46 PM

LadyHibiscus

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Well played Tony, your douche_fu is strong.

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RE: What dominant women endure online - a halfway cluel... - 8/6/2011 12:42:41 PM

Lockit

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No I'm not going to feed him a dose of humiliation he's asking for... I will laugh my ass off though!

You know someone is going to.

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RE: What dominant women endure online - a halfway cluel... - 8/6/2011 12:51:21 PM

TonyB79

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Very clever insults, ladies. What was I thinking? OF COURSE a bunch of cultured women like yourselves should be able to come on a fetish-themed site, post provocative pics, and create profiles specifically tailored to advertise your sexual proclivities, and not expect to be contacted by men who are interested in - GASP! - sex.

I hasten to add... I'm not saying these guys' behavior is appropriate or excusable. I just wonder what kind of attention you were honestly expecting to attract...

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RE: What dominant women endure online - a halfway cluel... - 8/6/2011 1:01:05 PM

BonesFromAsh

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quote:

ORIGINAL: TonyB79

Very clever insults, ladies. What was I thinking? OF COURSE a bunch of cultured women like yourselves should be able to come on a fetish-themed site, post provocative pics, and create profiles specifically tailored to advertise your sexual proclivities, and not expect to be contacted by men who are interested in - GASP! - sex.

I hasten to add... I'm not saying these guys' behavior is appropriate or excusable. I just wonder what kind of attention you were honestly expecting to attract...

Sounds like nothing more then the old "she was asking for it" line.

How dare we forget that men just can't help themselves.

One good cliche deserves another, right?

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RE: What dominant women endure online - a halfway cluel... - 8/6/2011 1:11:25 PM

TonyB79

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Actually, I find it rather shocking that you'd equate a group of middle-aged divas whining about being sexually propositioned (via email, mind) on a fetish-themed dating site with innocent women being raped in the real world. What you girls are describing is more akin to walking into a male brothel, approaching the nearest stud and saying, "Oh my god PLEASE rape me!" then slapping him across the face and saying "How DARE you!!!" when he says, "Yeah, okay."

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RE: What dominant women endure online - a halfway cluel... - 8/6/2011 1:15:24 PM

Epytropos

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyConstanze

Well, since you aren't convinced that being offended is not a real emotion we're all not entitled to our feelings?

You're entitled to your feelings, I'm just not convinced that they actually exist as they are described. I've never met anyone who claimed to be offended by things that wasn't trying to gain control over a related situation - the anti-porn people, the anti-gay people, the anti-violent film/tv/game/etc people, they all have one thing in common, and that is that they are trying to make some power play in society. If that estimation is incorrect, feel free to be as offended as you like.

quote:

some of us just might not like to be assaulted with the sexual fantasies of strangers, so your solution is to put the profile into hiding and not get any mails instead of having the reasonable expectation that people treat you like a human being and not some piece of meat that is there to fulfill their fantasies? Great solution.... Isn't that like telling a woman if you don't want to have your butt pinched in public transportation, you better not leave the house or make sure you only take a car? One would think that it is a reasonable expectation to be treated with some basic respect, but again, that's just me...

Fair point - I just don't see the emails that get quoted here as being anything close to as bad as all that. I see one of these threads every few weeks at a minimum, and many are rife with quotes of these 'terrible' emails, and they're hardly the worst thing I've read. I just have real trouble with the idea that they have any real affect on people who read them by choice. Being molested on a train is no closer to having an email sent to you asking if you like "loser pig boys" than it is to hearing the word 'cunt' in casual conversation, which incidentally is another one of those things people are always 'offended' enough by that others are expected to acquiesce to their 'needs'

quote:

Oh and congratulations on being one of those super rare males who get as much mail as women...

I never said I got as much as women. I said I got it and managed not to let it drive me to grief.

quote:

As for the profile views, not a clue how many of them I have, can't be honestly arsed to check who views my profile, and I don't really know why I should worry about having a certain number or less? As I said, couldn't even tell you how many people do view. What is there to worry about if it's less? Like no random strangers clicked on the profile and feeling a sense of loss?

I just thought his numbers were odd so I thought I'd make an aside about it. Not making any sort of commentary on anyone's potency via their view totals. Incidentally, how on earth do you manage not to click your 'people viewing me' tab when it's glowing red? It would drive me nuts...

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I speak only of My Way. Think it not an indictment of Your Way.

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RE: What dominant women endure online - a halfway cluel... - 8/6/2011 1:18:15 PM

LadyConstanze

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quote:

ORIGINAL: TonyB79

And also... "assaulted by the sexual fantasies of strangers"? Again, you're on a *fetish* site. You're soliciting those kinds of messages by - oh, I don't know - posting a pic of yourself crawling around on the floor in a catsuit, just to use one example. You were expecting Lord Byron?

To be honest, I was expecting a person who doesn't use the age old chestnut *this is a fetish site so it will be ok if I send a complete stranger explicit messages and naked pictures of my obese body and distinctively unimpressive dick* but that would require somebody with a brain.

Now if you think that picture is sexually explicit, you obviously don't get out much, which frankly doesn't surprise me at all, and it's not a catsuit, you know if you would spend more time educating yourself than reading the fast food menu (not to mention ordering from it) you possibly wouldn't come across as a completely clueless and unattractive freak, skip the puddings and head to the salad bar, because the type I like doesn't let himself go, has a brain and doesn't think a fetish site is the perfect excuse for him being a repulsive, overfed reptile - just to use ONE example.

Btw you might want to check out George Gordon Noel, while I don't expect poetry in my inbox, the "mad, bad and dangerous to know" sounds quite good and he seems to have been a gentleman who took care of himself and his body - so maybe let that be your inspiration?

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RE: What dominant women endure online - a halfway cluel... - 8/6/2011 1:23:31 PM

TonyB79

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Wow, you disagree with my opinions so it's on to fat jokes now? You're right, you're WAY classier than I am. I salute you, madam. *tips hat*

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RE: What dominant women endure online - a halfway cluel... - 8/6/2011 1:24:39 PM

Lockit

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OMG! ROFL! If you can read that and not laugh your ass off, you are much nicer than I am!

God that was a mouthful and was it ever good! Anyone have any tissue, I sprung a leak.

Laughing and sobbing here!

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