RE: Being tested as a Dom

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RE: Being tested as a Dom - 1/26/2012 1:29:04 PM

Arturas

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Ishtarr

Now that we have a live example, the debate should be solved.

After all, Arturas IS the prototypical example of why every wise sub SHOULD test her Dom to see if he's as full of shit as he seems to be.

You clearly have not had your hair pulled the right way and are begging for it.

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Post #: 81

RE: Being tested as a Dom - 1/26/2012 1:32:19 PM

crazyml

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Joined: 7/3/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Arturas
So, don't try this at home unless you know the secret Doms should know or you could get in deep shit real quick.

I'm morbidly curious as to what this "secret Doms should know" might be.

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Post #: 82

RE: Being tested as a Dom - 1/26/2012 1:33:01 PM

Arturas

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

Real Dominance. The gift that keeps on giving.

So true, and the gift is worth only as much as the Dom's intent to give more than he gets.

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Post #: 83

RE: Being tested as a Dom - 1/26/2012 1:35:09 PM

Arturas

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quote:

ORIGINAL: crazyml

quote:

ORIGINAL: Arturas
So, don't try this at home unless you know the secret Doms should know or you could get in deep shit real quick.

I'm morbidly curious as to what this "secret Doms should know" might be.

Write me and I will share it with you later this evening. Right now, I need to get back to some un-domly work to pay the bills.

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Post #: 84

RE: Being tested as a Dom - 1/26/2012 1:39:46 PM

crazyml

Posts: 5568
Joined: 7/3/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Arturas

quote:

ORIGINAL: crazyml

quote:

ORIGINAL: Arturas
So, don't try this at home unless you know the secret Doms should know or you could get in deep shit real quick.

I'm morbidly curious as to what this "secret Doms should know" might be.

Write me and I will share it with you later this evening. Right now, I need to get back to some un-domly work to pay the bills.

Oh, I'm a little embarrassed now....

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Post #: 85

RE: Being tested as a Dom - 1/26/2012 1:44:10 PM

MissImmortalPain

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Joined: 4/1/2011
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Just so you know...it is not just women that test men. Male subs do it to femdoms as well.

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We must all go through a right of passage,and it must be physical, it must be painful,and it must leave a mark.

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Post #: 86

RE: Being tested as a Dom - 1/26/2012 1:46:59 PM

DominantHunger

Posts: 57
Joined: 5/11/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: SomeCdnGuy

quote:

A submissive must be faced with things they would rather avoid, or it is a compatibly kinky relationship and not a D/s relationship.
quote:

If you do not derive some form of personal satisfaction from handling this responsibility, then you aren't really a Dom and instead you are looking for your compatibly kinky play partner.
LMAO!!! Don't you just love it when somebody starts telling us all what we "must" do or have.

I was referring to what was necessary for satisfying the definitions of terms Dom and sub. I would not presume to tell you what you must do in your own life.

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My mind has wandered from the flock, you see?
My mind has wandered, the man just said so.
My mind has wandered, I heard it on TV.

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Post #: 87

RE: Being tested as a Dom - 1/26/2012 1:50:18 PM

kalikshama

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Does the test administered by male Doms involve receiving oral sex?

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Post #: 88

RE: Being tested as a Dom - 1/26/2012 1:51:10 PM

crazyml

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Joined: 7/3/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DominantHunger

I was referring to what was necessary for satisfying the definitions of terms Dom and sub.

Oh no you weren't.

You were referring to what, for you, is necessary for satisfying the definitions of terms Dom and sub.

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Post #: 89

RE: Being tested as a Dom - 1/26/2012 1:52:05 PM

kalikshama

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quote:

The other is if you are just wanting easy sex and not wanting to contribute to the relationship

Yes, once I passed from sub frenzy into relationship mode I checked for this.

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Post #: 90

RE: Being tested as a Dom - 1/26/2012 1:53:07 PM

LadyHibiscus

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From: Island Of Misfit Toys
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quote:

ORIGINAL: crazyml

quote:

ORIGINAL: DominantHunger

I was referring to what was necessary for satisfying the definitions of terms Dom and sub.

Oh no you weren't.

You were referring to what, for you, is necessary for satisfying the definitions of terms Dom and sub.

Pretty much. Otherwise what, you would have to figure out exactly what that sub might balk at and toss it in his or her path? Really?

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Post #: 91

RE: Being tested as a Dom - 1/26/2012 1:53:21 PM

SomeCdnGuy

Posts: 45
Joined: 1/24/2012
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quote:

I've met seven CM submissives as their Dom since 2005.

So you average less than a year per sub. Yes!! This is the man I will emulate!

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Post #: 92

RE: Being tested as a Dom - 1/26/2012 1:54:38 PM

xXLithiumXx

Posts: 723
Joined: 9/2/2008
From: Hell, Kentucky
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quote:

ORIGINAL: kalikshama

quote:

See, I am hearing how my way, or the way I did things, was not what most subs would expect. I guess I come from a whole different end of the universe because I feel like this- When you meet a person that you feel you want to pursue the life with, and you communicate with them, and they tell you how constant tardiness is causing issues at work, how their lack of cleaning is causing them to not be able to find things or their house to smell bad, you go to their house and their animals are all but chewing your face off because they are not being properly cared for, and this sub is acting as if they have NO control, they have NO level of peace in their life as a result of this constant unruly pattern that they KEEP repeating, and they want to give that control to you...then it is your JOB as the dominant, and ONLY if they ask you to do so, but it is YOUR JOB to step in and offer guidelines.

Now, does that mean that the sub has to stick to them? No. In my case, my sub did not stick to them. But I did offer her clear rewards and clear punishments for these things. If she managed to keep the house clean for more than 24 hours, which was a feat since she had cats, dogs, fish, ferrets, snakes and a plethora of other crap that was not living (in some cases it may have been and I just didn't see it, because her house was like an episode of hoarders), then I would take her out, spend time with her, pet her, love on her, and if it was what she wanted we would session and play.

This sounds more like manifestation of mental illness than testing.

That is why I finally realized that there was nothing I could do.

It took some time for me to finally see that she was more imbalanced than I first thought.

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Post #: 93

RE: Being tested as a Dom - 1/26/2012 1:55:33 PM

SomeCdnGuy

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Joined: 1/24/2012
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quote:

I was referring to what was necessary for satisfying the definitions of terms Dom and sub.

No, I'm afraid you were referring to what was necessary for satisfying YOUR definitions of the terms Dom and sub.

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Post #: 94

RE: Being tested as a Dom - 1/26/2012 1:56:59 PM

SomeCdnGuy

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Joined: 1/24/2012
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quote:

Does the test administered by male Doms involve receiving oral sex?

Indubitably.

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Post #: 95

RE: Being tested as a Dom - 1/26/2012 1:57:14 PM

DominantHunger

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Joined: 5/11/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: crazyml

quote:

ORIGINAL: DominantHunger

I was referring to what was necessary for satisfying the definitions of terms Dom and sub.

Oh no you weren't.

You were referring to what, for you, is necessary for satisfying the definitions of terms Dom and sub.

Why the hostility? I may have stated things in my post in a way that wasn't clear, but I was in fact talking about what was necessary for satisfying those terms. I have cleared things up so you may feel free to address my point as it has been clarified or you may continue having your little fit about it. Your choice. I would't want to tell you what you must do.

_____________________________

My mind has wandered, from the straight and narrow.
My mind has wandered from the flock, you see?
My mind has wandered, the man just said so.
My mind has wandered, I heard it on TV.

(in reply to crazyml)

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Post #: 96

RE: Being tested as a Dom - 1/26/2012 1:58:42 PM

kalikshama

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quote:

ORIGINAL: SomeCdnGuy

quote:

I've met seven CM submissives as their Dom since 2005.

So you average less than a year per sub. Yes!! This is the man I will emulate!

/notes that SomeCdnGuy is all about the notches on his whip/

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Post #: 97

RE: Being tested as a Dom - 1/26/2012 1:59:26 PM

DominantHunger

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Joined: 5/11/2009
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quote:

ORIGINAL: SomeCdnGuy

quote:

I was referring to what was necessary for satisfying the definitions of terms Dom and sub.
No, I'm afraid you were referring to what was necessary for satisfying YOUR definitions of the terms Dom and sub.

Yes, and most seem to be conflating the terms Dom with leader and sub with follower. If you want to use the D/s label for a leader/follower relationship, great. I don't care. I am only making the semantic distinction to make it clear my point has nothing to do with the leader/follower mode.

_____________________________

My mind has wandered, from the straight and narrow.
My mind has wandered from the flock, you see?
My mind has wandered, the man just said so.
My mind has wandered, I heard it on TV.

(in reply to SomeCdnGuy)

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Post #: 98

RE: Being tested as a Dom - 1/26/2012 2:01:34 PM

MissImmortalPain

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I think, or would like to, that awareness was talking about testing ones temperment, limits, anger levels(all those random things we don't know about a stranger) I might be giving him to much credit...I have no idea. It just bothered me that as he often does he made it a female issue. Like saying "oh, she is female that means she will get pms and make you want to kill her once a month" , get used to it guys, when it isn't just women. It isn't just a dom sub thing either. It's everyone. Humans test each other on social and personal levels everyday. It is how we form social contracts and deep interpersonal realationships. It's just how we work.

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It is always by way of pain that we arrive at pleasure.

We must all go through a right of passage,and it must be physical, it must be painful,and it must leave a mark.

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Post #: 99

RE: Being tested as a Dom - 1/26/2012 2:05:14 PM

crazyml

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Joined: 7/3/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DominantHunger

quote:

ORIGINAL: crazyml

quote:

ORIGINAL: DominantHunger

I was referring to what was necessary for satisfying the definitions of terms Dom and sub.

Oh no you weren't.

You were referring to what, for you, is necessary for satisfying the definitions of terms Dom and sub.

Why the hostility? I may have stated things in my post in a way that wasn't clear, but I was in fact talking about what was necessary for satisfying those terms. I have cleared things up so you may feel free to address my point as it has been clarified or you may continue having your little fit about it. Your choice. I would't want to tell you what you must do.

Gosh, I'm struggling here to see how you might have inferred any hostility whatsoever from my post.

As for having "a little fit", I'm more comfortable than I can express to let others read my post, then yours and come to their own conclusions about who is having the hissy fit!

Bless you though!

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Post #: 100