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What's an acceptable introduction? - 10/3/2012 1:04:17 PM

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Hi, I posted a very detailed description of what I want and need. That thread was deleted, but I'm not sure why. And I don't think a woman wants to hear about my love for cheese. Help me out. I just received another message from a Mod explaining my thread was deleted because it was an extension of my profile. Isn't that the point of this type of introduction? The Mod then suggested that I share my hobbies and interests. Again, this being a kink site, that's what I did. I was also suggested to ask doms to review my profile, so go do that.

< Message edited by BlackSockSlave -- 10/3/2012 1:11:31 PM >

RE: What's an acceptable introduction? - 10/3/2012 1:07:37 PM

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Probably because it was a personal ad rather than an introduction or discussion.

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RE: What's an acceptable introduction? - 10/3/2012 1:09:38 PM

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First of all, a woman wants to hear about your love for cheese before she hears about your kinks. I understand why this is difficult for you to understand - but women are just wired differantly than men.

Secondly, as to what's allowed. The forums are here for casual disccusion - kind of like a munch that's online. It's not a dating site. The other side - the profiles, are where you place your want ad. A proper introduction is the kind of thing you would want to tell new co-workers if you went to work in a new placce, mostly.

Lead with your charming personality when trying to locate women, and save the kink for a little later, and you can't go wrong.

By the way, what kind of cheese do you like?

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RE: What's an acceptable introduction? - 10/3/2012 1:13:37 PM

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OP, probably because folks on this side don't care about your wants and needs. We care about discussions. It's not like women are sitting here on this side, just waiting for you to show up to tell us about those kinks you neeeeeeeed.

Would you walk into a bar and proclaim to everyone the way you like to have sex or what turns you on? Yes, it's the net, but try to have some social grace.

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The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to tsatske)

RE: What's an acceptable introduction? - 10/3/2012 1:13:43 PM

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I am very fond of Huntsman.

Your other thread was essentially a shopping list for a dream date. That doesn't constitute an introduction on a discussion board. Since your desires are so incredibly specific, maybe you don't want to talk to us here anyway? The boards are a good place to get to know people, but we are not necessarily blue eyed and slender.

Welcome to the discussions.

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RE: What's an acceptable introduction? - 10/3/2012 1:18:28 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: tsatske

First of all, a woman wants to hear about your love for cheese before she hears about your kinks. I understand why this is difficult for you to understand - but women are just wired differantly than men.

Secondly, as to what's allowed. The forums are here for casual disccusion - kind of like a munch that's online. It's not a dating site. The other side - the profiles, are where you place your want ad. A proper introduction is the kind of thing you would want to tell new co-workers if you went to work in a new placce, mostly.

Lead with your charming personality when trying to locate women, and save the kink for a little later, and you can't go wrong.

By the way, what kind of cheese do you like?

Sure, on a vanilla dating site, and I do talk about my love for cheese, how I'm a snuggle bear, and all that normal stuff there, but here I think whips, chains and ball gags. And cheddar cheese.

(in reply to tsatske)

RE: What's an acceptable introduction? - 10/3/2012 1:21:32 PM

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so, why do you think that throwing your kink/dick on the table is any more acceptable here? Please refer to LadyPs post. do you have ANY clue about how forums work?

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(in reply to BlackSockSlave)

RE: What's an acceptable introduction? - 10/3/2012 1:23:18 PM

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Well, sorry for breaking the rules. All I was trying to do was increase profile exposure. Most women don't search.

(in reply to BlackSockSlave)

RE: What's an acceptable introduction? - 10/3/2012 1:24:43 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: BlackSockSlave

Well, sorry for breaking the rules. All I was trying to do was increase profile exposure. Most women don't search.

Judging from your earlier post, you are not looking for "most women" anyway.

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[page 23 girl]

(in reply to BlackSockSlave)

RE: What's an acceptable introduction? - 10/3/2012 1:30:55 PM

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I've never introduced myself, so here's an example:

Hi everyone !!

I'm a more-or-less fit, fifty-ish switch female with interests far and wide. (Note how even in an intro, I managed to sneak in my approx age, approx fitness level and that I am a switch, clever, no? Not that clever actually, the long term members here are not full on idiots).

The BDSM lifestyle has been an interest for many years, and I can't wait to jump into some meaty discussions. I'm sure I'll enjoy the lighter side of CM forums, as well. (This sentence just showed that I lurked for a few days and have a general idea of what this forum is all about.)

Who am I: An intelligent, well-educated, intense, demanding, extremely creative, sometimes sarcastic, sometimes silly, female. I enjoy reading, writing, music, film, cooking, and many other non-kink activities. I don’t do everything, but what I do, I like to do well. (This is taken straight from my profile, but I would be shocked to get gold lettered for it, b/c it's not a kink ad, it's just stuff about ME.)

I look forward to getting to know the members here better, and learning even more about BDSM through these boards. (The obligatory sentence of social politeness which many ignore. You can ignore it as well, to add it merely shows you are not a barbarian.)

Now, was that hard? Not really. Yes, you may use my format. Yes, it is polite to say please and thank you.

You're welcome.

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RE: What's an acceptable introduction? - 10/3/2012 1:31:28 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: BlackSockSlave
Sure, on a vanilla dating site, and I do talk about my love for cheese, how I'm a snuggle bear, and all that normal stuff there, but here I think whips, chains and ball gags. And cheddar cheese.

Ok, we're not supposed to be critical of posters here in Introductions, but I'm going to have a word with you here.

I'm the *last* person to say you shouldn't talk about your kinks. But if that's all it is would be kink, mixed in with who you are looking for to meet those kinks, that's not going to fly. I can promise you that these folks know about My kinks. Some them are pretty far out there, but you don't see Me advertising for them in discussion areas. Also, I had the decorum to not shove them in the faces of other people before I even bothered to greet and introduce Myself.

There's a difference between saying what you are interested in, kink, non kink, or both, and deciding a personal ad is appropriate. Believe it or not, the chicks here don't want to listen to that before you've even said hello. That just makes you another kink driven guy on the internet that most women want nothing to do with.

Would you go to a munch for the first time and be so crass as to start telling folks what kinks you want fulfilled? Yeah, good luck with that.

ETA -

quote:

ORIGINAL: BlackSockSlave

Well, sorry for breaking the rules. All I was trying to do was increase profile exposure. Most women don't search.

You really think women are looking at your profile as a matter of interest when you act like that with no manners? Come on! It's the internet. Not an alternative universe.

< Message edited by LadyPact -- 10/3/2012 1:36:22 PM >

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to BlackSockSlave)

RE: What's an acceptable introduction? - 10/3/2012 1:33:41 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

quote:

ORIGINAL: BlackSockSlave

Well, sorry for breaking the rules. All I was trying to do was increase profile exposure. Most women don't search.

Judging from your earlier post, you are not looking for "most women" anyway.

No, I'm not, which is only more motive to post what I did.

(in reply to LadyHibiscus)

RE: What's an acceptable introduction? - 10/3/2012 1:36:42 PM

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Several things come to mind ...

1) I have to agree the discussion boards are not a newspaper 'Lost Lovers' column. We have had Introductions from time to time on time on the boards but they have not been the newspaper laundry list of the dream data. In fact EVEN on the profile side the more effective profiles shy away from that type of writing. On a personal note Use the profile as an introduction point and for clarification purposes, and use the journal entries to discuss more about details that would not be at the introduction level

2) Ya know, I do like cheese ... American, Swiss, Cheddar, Mozzarella, Bree ... (ducks fast and runs) Yes some of us do have a humor streak here.

MstrPBK
St/ Paul, MN USA

(in reply to GreedyTop)

RE: What's an acceptable introduction? - 10/3/2012 1:38:19 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: BlackSockSlave

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHibiscus

quote:

ORIGINAL: BlackSockSlave

Well, sorry for breaking the rules. All I was trying to do was increase profile exposure. Most women don't search.

Judging from your earlier post, you are not looking for "most women" anyway.

No, I'm not, which is only more motive to post what I did.

Exactly, you're looking for a very specific physical type, for a very specific kink interest. Now, it's not an unusual kink interest by any means, I have had many similar requests over the years.

The yellow pages, they're your friend. Really.

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[page 23 girl]

(in reply to BlackSockSlave)

RE: What's an acceptable introduction? - 10/3/2012 1:39:10 PM

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That's the thing, LadyP, we both know there are male subs who would do just that.

They go to a munch in a public vanilla restaurant setting and talk about their kink to any female that listens in the vain hope she has some dom tendencies. Then they whine about how they can't find a dom.

It's sad, really.

For the OP: When you and male subs like you see females as fetish delivery devices, we don't see you AT ALL.

We get so used to ignoring all the male subs like you, we really don't see you. We are responding to you now in the hope you may learn something. You're new, you get a few free passes, don't squander them.

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(in reply to LadyPact)

RE: What's an acceptable introduction? - 10/3/2012 1:40:39 PM

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You're totally blowing it way out of proportion. My intent was to very specifically share my needs and wants in hopes of her finding me. In hopes that my needs and wants were also her needs and wants. That profile extension in no way reflects how sweet or jerky I am. But for the record, I'm a complete gentleman.

(in reply to LadyPact)

RE: What's an acceptable introduction? - 10/3/2012 1:43:36 PM

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And once again, so sorry for any wrong doing.

(in reply to BlackSockSlave)

RE: What's an acceptable introduction? - 10/3/2012 1:44:25 PM

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<Fwoooop>

That's the sound of what I told you going right over your head.

Have a lovely day, OP.

Oh, and six months from now, when you start a thread wondering why you can't find what you are looking for on the net, please save all of us the time and the keystrokes.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to BlackSockSlave)

RE: What's an acceptable introduction? - 10/3/2012 1:45:14 PM

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From: Island Of Misfit Toys
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Yepper. Oh well, we tried!

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[page 23 girl]

(in reply to LadyPact)

RE: What's an acceptable introduction? - 10/3/2012 1:46:08 PM

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Welcome...

And seriously, the ladies here are trying to help you.

I bet you really are a great guy. Aside from the fact that I don't want a kinky guy around ME.....I do think most guys are pretty decent. But the way you are presenting yourself here is with the 'guy' brain mindset. The ladies are trying their level best to explain to you that isn't going to get you what you want.

Pay attention.

And quit being so passive aggressive fucking defensive already.

< Message edited by LaTigresse -- 10/3/2012 1:47:18 PM >

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My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to BlackSockSlave)

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