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RE: Why all submissives are all about sex??


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RE: Why all submissives are all about sex?? - 9/29/2006 5:03:46 PM   
DiurnalVampire


Posts: 8125
Joined: 1/19/2006
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline
Personally, I do not YET use my boy sexually  He is still a virgin and I am going to alow him to stay that way until he is ready to change it. However, I agree with the OP that the ones that aproach for strictly sexual service were usually x'd off my list quickly.  A list of thing they would be WILLING to do and a list of things they require are quite different. I dont mind a "willing" list, its sort of the opposite of limits. However teling me the things you offer as service, without any moention of nonsexual service anywhere in there and I consider you a joke. Male or female subs... if all you want is to be topped sexually you are not for me. I lead up to sexual service on a merit base, you should never assume you are going to be granted that sort of access to your Mistress. If you are useless otherwise, then why should I reward you with sex?
Just my humble opinion.

DV

_____________________________

I will be your Dominate if you will be my submit - Fox

Snarko Ergo Sum
If you cannot change your mind, how are you so sure you still have one? -proverb

*Owner of Fox - collared 10/13/07*
VampiresLair

(in reply to LaTigresse)
Profile   Post #: 41
RE: Why all submissives are all about sex?? - 9/29/2006 6:01:11 PM   
Zinja2007


Posts: 30
Joined: 9/20/2006
Status: offline
I totally get why you posed this question.  He asked why all mistresses are all about money.  You counteract with why are all subs all about sex.  I think it is a way of pointing out the silliness of lump summing a "domme".   Generalizing is a bad idea b/c we all know SOME subs are not all about sex and SOME Mistresses are not all about getting paid (so they can upkeep their dungeon equipment, fetish attire, and attorney/court fees if they get into trouble with the law - just kidding on the last part.).

Bottom line though, would you agree, is that we are all just ordinary living folks who happen to share in a common sexual-based lifestyle.  And WE, the people, all deserve to be happy.

We can debate our opinion till we're blue in the face - - people are going to believe what they wish to believe.  One issue, a 1000 different perspectives. 

Bottom line: We are all a bunch of normal people with freaky, deaky, sucky fucky,  hot, intense kinky desires.

(in reply to EbonyFtshGoddess)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: Why all submissives are all about sex?? - 9/29/2006 6:01:56 PM   
MisPandora


Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline
*bonks my big ol slave cock against the screen at Ebony*

See, I'm worthy.  Really.  I am.

*snickers*

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to EbonyFtshGoddess)
Profile   Post #: 43
RE: Why all submissives are all about sex?? - 9/29/2006 6:06:16 PM   
Zinja2007


Posts: 30
Joined: 9/20/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MisPandora

*bonks my big ol slave cock against the screen at Ebony*

See, I'm worthy.  Really.  I am.

*snickers*



(in reply to MisPandora)
Profile   Post #: 44
RE: Why all submissives are all about sex?? - 9/29/2006 7:58:57 PM   
EbonyFtshGoddess


Posts: 446
Joined: 1/1/2006
From: Hollywood Hills, CA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterFireMaam


Just my thoughts:
If you don't want to be seen as a sex object, take most of the picture on your profile down. They're VERY nice, but they do rather send a message that you WANT men who are sexually motivated. You're making it hard on yourself if you're looking for service oriented men.

Master Fire



first off. i don't mind being seen as sexy because i am and i couldn't nor shouldn't have to hide my beauty to avoid attracting sex slaves. all women here get approached by males such as that regardless of how they look.  the words in my profile speak for themselves.. and those words stipulate that i don't seek sex slaves. maybe i should dominate wearing a burqa or a hijab.

the point of this thread was for me to draw attention to the disparity between males subs bitching about female dominants always wanting money when all they is want is sex.

perhaps that point eluded you.

no where did i say, nor my intial query imply, that i have ANY problem whatsoever finding service oriented supplicants.. because the men that actually READ my profile, rather than only oogling the photos, know what i seek. they see that my profile states i don't want sex slaves and then we take it from there.

the ones that approach me for sex equal the number that approach me for what i consider real servitude.

plus if i take down my pics i'd get emails asking me to mail them one anyway.


quote:

I would have to agree with Fire on this one; you are what you protray... if she is protraying herself as a Pro trix  then she needs to accept people's conclusions- hard but fact....
MASTER Rocker


you obviously don't have a rubber fetish, rubber is tight, rubber is sexy and rubber shows off your whole body. i'm proud of my body and it doesn't impede me one single bit. nearly every domme gets approached by men only seeking sexual service. anyone that takes a MOMENT to read the words of my profile, rather than making inferences clearly knows that i train only lifestyle slaves. i love how people can draw totally different conclusions from something that's rather clear. but gotta love ad hominem attacks.

gooddogbenji
quote:

LaT,

You know I love ya, but have you scrolled through her pics?

Sexy dress is one thing, but advertising with close ups of one's ass, and one's ass only, in one picture probably goes under "leading on ass-men."


i suppose you wouldn't know anything about *queening* .. which is a fetish  practice that i quite enjoy. of course i'm going to show a pic of my ass if i want to since i have a nice ass for squishing someone's face, plus i use my ass for asphyxia. doesn't mean they can *lick* me, whenever i face sit anyone i'm in rubber ANYway.. lol i love how this has turned into all about ME when i was speaking in generalities as to why men bitch and moan about female dominants wanting tributes yet all most of them want is sex. but, of course, seeing how if i remember correctly from a prior profile you had, you pretty much lack offline BDSM experience, so i'm not surprised by your assertions.  

cloudboy
quote:

One other thing: how would you feel if you had to pay men to have satisfying sex with you otherwise you couldn't get any? IMO, just to go out on the limb a little bit, you might resent this situation. You might resent it even more if such men made you lust after them.


point well taken cloudboy. that's definitely an interesting take on it and now i can see the resentment a tad more- seriously.. no sarcasm either. i can see how males would be resentful of that when you state it thusly.

MisPandora
quote:

*bonks my big ol slave cock against the screen at Ebony*

See, I'm worthy.  Really.  I am.

*snickers* 


ouch.. that hurt.. LOL

**edited to reply to several at once**





< Message edited by EbonyFtshGoddess -- 9/29/2006 8:34:36 PM >


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One Man's Phobia is Another Man's Fetish

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Profile   Post #: 45
RE: Why all submissives are all about sex?? - 9/29/2006 8:26:49 PM   
EbonyFtshGoddess


Posts: 446
Joined: 1/1/2006
From: Hollywood Hills, CA
Status: offline
quote:

I totally get why you posed this question. He asked why all mistresses are all about money. You counteract with why are all subs all about sex. I think it is a way of pointing out the silliness of lump summing a "domme". Generalizing is a bad idea b/c we all know SOME subs are not all about sex and SOME Mistresses are not all about getting paid (so they can upkeep their dungeon equipment, fetish attire, and attorney/court fees if they get into trouble with the law - just kidding on the last part.).


wow.. a person with a brain capable of coherent thought and that actually SAW my intention with posing this question.. the real purpose of my query rather than it being turned towards me like i'm saying I'M personally having problems finding service oriented slaves- which i'm obviously not... at least one person got what i was talking about.


_____________________________

One Man's Phobia is Another Man's Fetish

(in reply to Zinja2007)
Profile   Post #: 46
RE: Why all submissives are all about sex?? - 9/29/2006 8:31:47 PM   
LadyHugs


Posts: 2299
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
Dear EbonyFtshGoddess, Ladies and Gentlemen;
 
It is indeed a curious thing that majority of submissives/slaves focus their entire energy on 'all about sex.'
 
How 'sex' figures in with submissives/slaves has a lot to do with the dynamic if we're speaking on male dominant/female submissive; it is indeed more likely sex will be involved but, not necessarily.
 
If we're speaking on a femdom/male submissive dynamic, we're the ones who determine sexual involvements; to which men are seemingly all ready to be sex studs; be it on the bottom or on Top.
 
Ladies have seemingly been, through the centuries, the one who stimulate the 'mating game' per se; to which men respond to.  Nature blesses creatures with displays, courtship and mating as to continue the species.  Some males are more primal than most; some women answer that primal spirit as well.  But, there is always those who choose to harness that primal beast within.  There is little doubt; that men and women package themselves for public consumption.  Most times packaged due to external influences and or assumptions; e.g. porn, magazines, advertisements, dressing, behavior/attitude.  Sex sells--it speaks to our primal need to seek a mate, to continue the species, to have safety, companionship and security.
 
But, like in nature--the female is the one when it is time to mate; not the male.  Men are just always eager to do so. 
 
Age is also a factor.  Seems my sexual desires were boundless in my earlier days.  After age 40 though, I kept loosing interest in sex.  Now I have no interest at all.  However, that does not mean we loose our sexuality--but, might be we loose are need to answer the primal call to mate on the first or second ring; perhaps we just let the answering machine answer the call. [Chuckles]
 
Respectfully submitted for consideration,
Lady Hugs
 

(in reply to EbonyFtshGoddess)
Profile   Post #: 47
RE: Why all submissives are all about sex?? - 9/29/2006 8:44:43 PM   
Emperor1956


Posts: 2370
Joined: 11/7/2005
Status: offline
quote:

MisPandora:  *bonks my big ol slave cock against the screen at Ebony*

See, I'm worthy.  Really.  I am.

*snickers*


OH you are so bad.  Someone ought to spank you.  ME!  *GRIN*

E.

_____________________________

"When you wake up, Pooh," said Piglet, "what's the first thing you say?"
"What's for breakfast? What do you say, Piglet?"
"I say, I wonder what's going to happen exciting today?"
Pooh nodded thoughtfully.
"It's the same thing," he said.

(in reply to MisPandora)
Profile   Post #: 48
RE: Why all submissives are all about sex?? - 9/29/2006 8:58:26 PM   
BlkTallFullfig


Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004
Status: offline
quote:

if someone is in a committed relationship with her slave and she chooses to utilize him sexually, i feel that's entirely different than these twats that approach dommes with a wishlist of sexual things they want from her, claiming to be a *slave* or a *sub* when in stark reality.. all they want is to get off in a kinky or fetishy fashion.
Someone has said before that wankers use the approach because it must work on occasion.   Imagine no courtship needed whatsoever, no money to spend on a professional, and still getting one's rocks off.

I myself seek to be in a relationship with a slave who loves sex, because I certainly plan to use him that way.   However, if he cannot approach me as a woman with whom he can have a relationship, he will certainly never get to know about my sexuality...  And if at some point in my lifetime, I begin to entertain playing with men without their having invested the time to care for me as a human being, you best bet it's going to cost him where it hurts, his wallet.    M

_____________________________

a.k.a. SexyBossyBBW
""Touching was, and still is, and will always be, the true revolution" Nikki Giovanni

(in reply to EbonyFtshGoddess)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: Why all submissives are all about sex?? - 9/30/2006 12:40:03 AM   
EbonyFtshGoddess


Posts: 446
Joined: 1/1/2006
From: Hollywood Hills, CA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: gooddogbenji

Two points:

A - Even if the profile were to clearly and exclusively say "NO SEX," there would still be conflicting messages: Text and clearly sexual pictures.  So which is the true message which someone will see? 


I dunno.. it depends how dense someone is. if they see this little caveat in my profile and choose to ignore it, regardless of how sexy my photos are, then that's on them.:

" i ONLYtake dominant lovers. Preferably rubber tops into heavy rubber and sadism, total lifestyle control, breathplay and rubber dolls.................With that being said, I do NOT bed my slaves anyway. slaves are slaves, they're not lovers."

most males don't even take the time to read anyone's profile. especially not one as verbose as mine. but when someone does then i know they've gotten past my pictures and there is something deeper to him and he deserve further audience with me. because i've laid it ALL out on the line what i expect and what they can expect. if they look for a deeper meaning or inference then they're wasting their time. i've already told them.

quote:

ORIGINAL: gooddogbenji

B - The following things are mentioned in the OP's profile which could confuse a hapless sub further:

quote:

 
If you wish to serve me, you will worship me like the Goddess I am


if someone is that easily confused, then they really are a bit too daft for my personal intellectual tastes and requirements in a submissive or slave male. you make my profile appear as a venus fly trap waiting for some *hapless* male fly to land in it before being devoured by my digestive brew of confusion...lol um sorry  i prefer males whom are versed in the ways of Cybele worship. if someone doesn't know what that is (or has to immediately run to google and look it up) then they already aren't of my calibre nor ilk of slave. Goddess Worship transcends BDSM for the most part and if you take that statement of mine as a sexually connotative one.. then i bet you're one of the many rushing over to google up what Cybele even means to begin with. if someone is confused by Goddess worship or takes it as sexually suggestive.. then they're a moron. i'm sorry. but they are.


quote:

ORIGINAL: gooddogbenji

While this does not directly say "SEX," common use of "worship" and such statements often imply sex on this site and sites like it.  And isn't common use what language is all about?


boy did you hit the proverbial nail on the head with that one. the optimal sentence here being  'common use of "worship" and such statements often imply sex on this site and sites like it.'

some of us live in the real world of fetish dear. not some hyper-dogmatic, online fantasy dungeon realm. if you need a *site* to tell you what the common usage of a word is.. then you really need to get out more darling.  common doesn't always or necessarily hold the same connotation offline as it does in the online world. no one goes around saying LOL  or BRB offline and expect it to mean the same thing. they're both of *common* usage online, but people would look at you like a stark raving lunatic if you told them that shit offline.

the same goes for worship. the way i view worship is either in the sense of Goddess Worship.. or in the sense of  the worship of a certain body part. this can or cannot be oral. and by oral i don't mean oral sex.. i mean oral as in licking of feet, or hands etc. worship is an intense adoration or fascination or appreciation for the object of  focus. it can be a 2 hour foot rub that doesn't even have to involve any licking.. that's still foot worship.



quote:

ORIGINAL: gooddogbenji

Also used are:

Facesitting

i have a big round ass that i LOVE using for queening. i enjoy smothering someone under my ass and controling their ability to breathe by smooshing my ass on someone's face. i use my ass as i use any other tool in my toy bag. it's especially well suited for breath control and asphyxia. i'm not bare assed getting my ass or pussy licked.. i use it for smothering. queening can be oral or non oral. just like foot worship can. so no.. queening is not necessarily a sexually connotative part of my either... next...

Scents & armpits

how the hell are those sexually suggestive? boy your argument is getting weaker and weaker by the sentence.

Financial slavery (Doesn't mean prodomme, but the two often flow into each other.  I mean apart from being against TOS)

pro domination is farrr different from financial slavery. financial slavery is a fetish for some.. pro domination is a business arrangement. but i'm not here to argue the difference between the two.  so unlike you.. i'm staying on track.  how is that sexual? we're talking about my sexually suggestive profile that's sending out mixed messages remember? not the couple of money bitches that i have. now i will give you this. i was/am not aware that financial slavery is against the Terms of Service for this site as i've seen it referenced much more blatantly than i have on many profiles not to mention my profile was approved here several times.. most recently like last week. if my profile was such an egregious violation of their Terms of Service then i'm sure it wouldn't have been approved. i have no problem removing that because i'm not one to violate TOS.. but it's not a big deal to me. i'd be more hurt if i had to remove any mention of rubber on my profile due to Terms of Service violations.. with that being said.. it still has nothing to do with anything sexually connotative on my profile so that's totally non sequitur- let's focus here dear... next.

Strapon training (Now if that aint sexual, call me Mother Theresa!)

silly boy, just because i don't let them fuck me doesn't mean that i don't like strapping it on.  i quite enjoy taking male ass while he's safely away locked in a chastity device.  technically that's a sexual reference, albeit anal sex for him. but since we're talking how my profile states no slaves as lovers, you could take it out of context and consider it sex (even though it's obvious i mean straight coital intercourse with a slave) .. seeing how feeble your arguments are so far.. i'll toss the dog that bone.

Cuckolding (Mentionned twice)

ok.. here goes. anyone that knows anything about the interaction of a cuckolding relationship is aware that there are many possible dynamics at play. there is no one cuckolding scenario and i won't go into all the possible scenarios of engagement on that one. i'll merely enlighten as to how my cuckolding relationships go. my cuckold serves me just like any other slave does in any other capacity. he just is forced to endure being closeted or mummified, or under a bed etc while my Top & i are enjoying each other intimately. and we LOVE it. my Top enjoys that power he wields over my weaker slaves and myself.. i enjoy making my slave jealous because i know he wishes he could be the one fucking me. contrary to popular belief not all cucks get the creampie or get to perform oral service. if i were to accept a cuckold male as my husband, then he would get more privileges in that area than a mere cuckold slave. as it stands now, my cuckold slave enjoys torture while i enjoy extreme pleasure that he's incapable of giving me. still no coital intercourse implied there.. so next feeble argument.

Boot, body, stocking/glove, foot/hand worship

body worship i can understand how that could be taken both ways. but oh lord... boot, stocking/glove, foot/hand worship? aren't you the little wealth of information.  another water-weak argument from you as there is nothing sexually suggestive about any of those other than body worship.  even then, for me, body worship is a privilege of my top slave. he's my personal attendant being allowed to prepare my bath, pedicure/manicure me.. tending to my dressing concerns like lacing my corset, massaging me after a rough day or whatever, shaving my legs or under my arms etc. the body worship that i engage in is not sexual either and anyone truly cogniscent of Goddess worship wouldn't automatically equate it to something sexual. maybe in online world body worship is a euphemism for subs that want to lick some pussy... next.

Virgin males (not sexual, but adds in one more sexual element) <== that's funny

hardly anything you've said thus far about my profile is overly sexual or implying sex betwixt my slaves & myself. lol so what's new?  why attempt to add that little stipulation regarding *not sexual but adds in one more sexual element* to this piss poor argument and not the others? few aspects of human life aren't sexual. we're sexual beings and that's our driving force in life.. it's rather innate in us,  but it doesn't mean we want to be approached by every being in a sexual manner. to me the ultimate height of servitude is when a male denies his innate, primal sexual drives to offer himself to me in complete supplication. virgin slaves are more pure to me in that they haven't had sex so their drive is even less about their own selfish sexual gratification and more focused on me..... next weak ass argument.

Toilet servitude

ok.. so i like to piss on people  or make them drink it. how the hell is that sexually suggestive? oh.. i forgot.. maybe toilet play is in the same sexual line of suggestively mixed message fire as boot worship, hand or glove worship in your world.


quote:

ORIGINAL: gooddogbenji

Under the listed interests, she LIVES FOR

Body worship (you've been over that.. you're being redundant)
Foot worship (you've been over that.. you're being redundant)
Strapons (you've been over that.. you're being redundant)
Cuckolding, (we've been over that too already.. still redundant)

loves

Ass play

that would fall under strapon play or electro/anal torture.. once again.. nothing is going up my ass so i don't consider that the same as the sexual intimacy i have with a lover. i don't stick electro toys up my lover's ass and shock him like a mink. but it sure is fun to stick things up my slaves' arses. still isn't coital intercourse which is what MY profile is talking about.

Vaccuum stimulation

how is that sexually suggestive? i enjoy pumping my slaves' cocks up and then performing CBT on them. it's fun torturing pumped up balls or cocks. it's not like i'm pumping them up so i can fuck them.  that doesn't say anything sexually suggestive to a slave who's about to have his cock pumped just so i can torture it or do some knife or fireplay or C/B bondage.


quote:

ORIGINAL: gooddogbenji

Well, I'm sure you get the idea.

lol only if you trying to give the idea that you have absolutely NO life or nothing better to do with your time than attempt to inadequately pick apart my profile in such an absurdly fallacious manner whilst clutching at straws to save your drowning assertions and make yourself appear to be a MasterdeBatur that you deem yourself to be.  because that's about the only idea any sane person would walk away with from your idiotic *conclusions* (for utter lack of a more apropos word).

the only reason i took the time to address each one was because you obviously adopted my profile as your new hobby for the day and took the time to attempt to pick it apart so i figured the least i could do was toss the dog a bone and address each thing you brought up.


quote:

gooddogbenji

How on earth could a sub get a mixed message?


perhaps if he was as dense as the *sub* who mixed the message up from the onset then i'm sure he could get a mixed message. anything is possible..you can lead an idiot to knowledge, but you can't make him think. it's ludicrous take an entire profile and chop it up to suit your erroneous arguments then totally negate or ignore the context from which they were drawn. you picked and chose the closet fetish/activity to anything even REMOTELY sexual so you would have the tiniest modicum of a leg to stand on with your *arguments*.

that about sums it up. your little fallacy fest you call a debate was rather amusing and definitely took my mind off my food poisoning tonight. i'm thoroughly tickled when people are incapable of proper discourse.

sit Ubu sit.....good dog





_____________________________

One Man's Phobia is Another Man's Fetish

(in reply to gooddogbenji)
Profile   Post #: 50
RE: Why all submissives are all about sex?? - 9/30/2006 1:10:54 AM   
MisPandora


Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Kirei

Personally I think its part of the "its not fair thing" for them.  Female subs know that sex may most likely be involved with a male dominant.  Female dominants do not want this and think more along service lines....so I think they think this is unfair and that maybe the women get all the luck.  Personally in my real life experiences this is all a myth....but people will believe what people will believe.


Koneko.

Let's not lump all of the femdoms in the "don't want sex" category, shall we? LOL

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to Kirei)
Profile   Post #: 51
RE: Why all submissives are all about sex?? - 9/30/2006 1:14:42 AM   
MisPandora


Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Emperor1956

quote:

MisPandora:  *bonks my big ol slave cock against the screen at Ebony*

See, I'm worthy.  Really.  I am.

*snickers*


OH you are so bad.  Someone ought to spank you.  ME!  *GRIN*

E.

*bonks my big ol cock on your head*

WAKE UP!  You're dreaming again, Emperor!!!!! LOL

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to Emperor1956)
Profile   Post #: 52
RE: Why all submissives are all about sex?? - 9/30/2006 1:48:11 AM   
UtopianRanger


Posts: 3251
Status: offline

quote:

I don't want to fuck the subs either...I am turned on by doms not sub males. 


Baby.....You just haven't met the right submissive guy yet - Give it a little more time, ok?




 - R

< Message edited by UtopianRanger -- 9/30/2006 1:49:25 AM >


_____________________________

"If you are going to win any battle, you have to do one thing. You have to make the mind run the body. Never let the body tell the mind what to do... the body is never tired if the mind is not tired."

-General George S. Patton


(in reply to degradess)
Profile   Post #: 53
RE: Why all submissives are all about sex?? - 9/30/2006 2:01:28 AM   
MisPandora


Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: UtopianRanger


quote:

I don't want to fuck the subs either...I am turned on by doms not sub males. 


Baby.....You just haven't met the right submissive guy yet - Give it a little more time, ok?

- R

Ranger --

It's interesting that you chimed in here given our conversations about this in the past.  I've had a male submissive or two that have been astounding in the performance department.  Just because they're submissive doesn't mean that you need to KEEP them that way in your bed.  Ladies, if you desire your charge to SERVE you, have it your way.....however you wish him to perform, be it as a ravenous animal or as a docile housepet.  The choice is yours, if you choose to accept that form of service.

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to UtopianRanger)
Profile   Post #: 54
RE: Why all submissives are all about sex?? - 9/30/2006 2:31:03 AM   
UtopianRanger


Posts: 3251
Status: offline
quote:


Ranger --

It's interesting that you chimed in here given our conversations about this in the past.  I've had a male submissive or two that have been astounding in the performance department.  Just because they're submissive doesn't mean that you need to KEEP them that way in your bed.  Ladies, if you desire your charge to SERVE you, have it your way.....however you wish him to perform, be it as a ravenous animal or as a docile housepet.  The choice is yours, if you choose to accept that form of service.


Yes we have my Midear......

I find it hella funny when I see across-the-board generalizations made in these cases.



 - R


_____________________________

"If you are going to win any battle, you have to do one thing. You have to make the mind run the body. Never let the body tell the mind what to do... the body is never tired if the mind is not tired."

-General George S. Patton


(in reply to MisPandora)
Profile   Post #: 55
RE: Why all submissives are all about sex?? - 9/30/2006 7:08:31 AM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline
This way this thread got off-track and my inability to focus when I was so tired yesterday caused me to come back and re-read it again this morning with its additions.

It all got me thinking. When I initially read the beginning statement and questions I understood where it was coming from, I had followed the other thread that created the idea. Then things got all off track, focusing on a subject that was not the original intent, at least that is my take on it this morning. Now, I still feel the way I do about photographs. I am of artistic bent and love erotica. Yes it is sexual but not necessarily a precurser to sex. Which leads to how my tired brain got off track.

I was frustrated that I understood what Ebony was saying but then I also understood what benji was saying. So, doing what makes me so good at what I get paid to do I started to think about the differing points of view and why two people that I know are reasonably intelligent had such differing views. Now understand I also have an obnoxious tongue in cheek sense of humour and mean no disrespect at all but it kinda reminded me of Bill Clinton and his point of view on oral sex and saying he did not have sexual relations with sweet lil Monica.

Anyway, not to get totally off track. I think what all of this comes down to is personal perspective. The same thing that seems to cause soooooooooo many hot debates on these forums. I am all about trying to understand how another person thinks so that I can know why they are arguing so vehemently for their point of view and so forthish. It does not mean I will ultimately agree, but at least I understand.

That being said. I think for a guy, especially a young guy, anything that has to do with female body parts can be construed as sexual. In addition, anything that has to do with said young man's penis and ass will also be very sexual in nature to him. However!!! Being a woman and having read and talked to quite a few dominant women that play with men, they do not always see those things in the same light. I get that totally but I don't think the young guy necessarily will. I am going to leave my own personal point of view out of it because mine is not really applicable. My real point is this. I don't think two parties with such different mindsets could possibly agree. Their perspectives are just so vastly different. I don't thing either is wrong, it's just that each is looking at the same subject from a thinking process that is alien to the other person's.


_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to UtopianRanger)
Profile   Post #: 56
RE: Why all submissives are all about sex?? - 9/30/2006 8:58:42 AM   
marieToo


Posts: 3595
Joined: 5/21/2006
From: Jersey
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: EbonyFtshGoddess

quote:

ORIGINAL: gooddogbenji

Two points:

A - Even if the profile were to clearly and exclusively say "NO SEX," there would still be conflicting messages: Text and clearly sexual pictures.  So which is the true message which someone will see? 


I dunno.. it depends how dense someone is. if they see this little caveat in my profile and choose to ignore it, regardless of how sexy my photos are, then that's on them.:

" i ONLYtake dominant lovers. Preferably rubber tops into heavy rubber and sadism, total lifestyle control, breathplay and rubber dolls.................With that being said, I do NOT bed my slaves anyway. slaves are slaves, they're not lovers."

most males don't even take the time to read anyone's profile. especially not one as verbose as mine. but when someone does then i know they've gotten past my pictures and there is something deeper to him and he deserve further audience with me. because i've laid it ALL out on the line what i expect and what they can expect. if they look for a deeper meaning or inference then they're wasting their time. i've already told them.

quote:

ORIGINAL: gooddogbenji

B - The following things are mentioned in the OP's profile which could confuse a hapless sub further:

quote:

 
If you wish to serve me, you will worship me like the Goddess I am


if someone is that easily confused, then they really are a bit too daft for my personal intellectual tastes and requirements in a submissive or slave male. you make my profile appear as a venus fly trap waiting for some *hapless* male fly to land in it before being devoured by my digestive brew of confusion...lol um sorry  i prefer males whom are versed in the ways of Cybele worship. if someone doesn't know what that is (or has to immediately run to google and look it up) then they already aren't of my calibre nor ilk of slave. Goddess Worship transcends BDSM for the most part and if you take that statement of mine as a sexually connotative one.. then i bet you're one of the many rushing over to google up what Cybele even means to begin with. if someone is confused by Goddess worship or takes it as sexually suggestive.. then they're a moron. i'm sorry. but they are.


quote:

ORIGINAL: gooddogbenji

While this does not directly say "SEX," common use of "worship" and such statements often imply sex on this site and sites like it.  And isn't common use what language is all about?


boy did you hit the proverbial nail on the head with that one. the optimal sentence here being  'common use of "worship" and such statements often imply sex on this site and sites like it.'

some of us live in the real world of fetish dear. not some hyper-dogmatic, online fantasy dungeon realm. if you need a *site* to tell you what the common usage of a word is.. then you really need to get out more darling.  common doesn't always or necessarily hold the same connotation offline as it does in the online world. no one goes around saying LOL  or BRB offline and expect it to mean the same thing. they're both of *common* usage online, but people would look at you like a stark raving lunatic if you told them that shit offline.

the same goes for worship. the way i view worship is either in the sense of Goddess Worship.. or in the sense of  the worship of a certain body part. this can or cannot be oral. and by oral i don't mean oral sex.. i mean oral as in licking of feet, or hands etc. worship is an intense adoration or fascination or appreciation for the object of  focus. it can be a 2 hour foot rub that doesn't even have to involve any licking.. that's still foot worship.



quote:

ORIGINAL: gooddogbenji

Also used are:

Facesitting

i have a big round ass that i LOVE using for queening. i enjoy smothering someone under my ass and controling their ability to breathe by smooshing my ass on someone's face. i use my ass as i use any other tool in my toy bag. it's especially well suited for breath control and asphyxia. i'm not bare assed getting my ass or pussy licked.. i use it for smothering. queening can be oral or non oral. just like foot worship can. so no.. queening is not necessarily a sexually connotative part of my either... next...

Scents & armpits

how the hell are those sexually suggestive? boy your argument is getting weaker and weaker by the sentence.

Financial slavery (Doesn't mean prodomme, but the two often flow into each other.  I mean apart from being against TOS)

pro domination is farrr different from financial slavery. financial slavery is a fetish for some.. pro domination is a business arrangement. but i'm not here to argue the difference between the two.  so unlike you.. i'm staying on track.  how is that sexual? we're talking about my sexually suggestive profile that's sending out mixed messages remember? not the couple of money bitches that i have. now i will give you this. i was/am not aware that financial slavery is against the Terms of Service for this site as i've seen it referenced much more blatantly than i have on many profiles not to mention my profile was approved here several times.. most recently like last week. if my profile was such an egregious violation of their Terms of Service then i'm sure it wouldn't have been approved. i have no problem removing that because i'm not one to violate TOS.. but it's not a big deal to me. i'd be more hurt if i had to remove any mention of rubber on my profile due to Terms of Service violations.. with that being said.. it still has nothing to do with anything sexually connotative on my profile so that's totally non sequitur- let's focus here dear... next.

Strapon training (Now if that aint sexual, call me Mother Theresa!)

silly boy, just because i don't let them fuck me doesn't mean that i don't like strapping it on.  i quite enjoy taking male ass while he's safely away locked in a chastity device.  technically that's a sexual reference, albeit anal sex for him. but since we're talking how my profile states no slaves as lovers, you could take it out of context and consider it sex (even though it's obvious i mean straight coital intercourse with a slave) .. seeing how feeble your arguments are so far.. i'll toss the dog that bone.

Cuckolding (Mentionned twice)

ok.. here goes. anyone that knows anything about the interaction of a cuckolding relationship is aware that there are many possible dynamics at play. there is no one cuckolding scenario and i won't go into all the possible scenarios of engagement on that one. i'll merely enlighten as to how my cuckolding relationships go. my cuckold serves me just like any other slave does in any other capacity. he just is forced to endure being closeted or mummified, or under a bed etc while my Top & i are enjoying each other intimately. and we LOVE it. my Top enjoys that power he wields over my weaker slaves and myself.. i enjoy making my slave jealous because i know he wishes he could be the one fucking me. contrary to popular belief not all cucks get the creampie or get to perform oral service. if i were to accept a cuckold male as my husband, then he would get more privileges in that area than a mere cuckold slave. as it stands now, my cuckold slave enjoys torture while i enjoy extreme pleasure that he's incapable of giving me. still no coital intercourse implied there.. so next feeble argument.

Boot, body, stocking/glove, foot/hand worship

body worship i can understand how that could be taken both ways. but oh lord... boot, stocking/glove, foot/hand worship? aren't you the little wealth of information.  another water-weak argument from you as there is nothing sexually suggestive about any of those other than body worship.  even then, for me, body worship is a privilege of my top slave. he's my personal attendant being allowed to prepare my bath, pedicure/manicure me.. tending to my dressing concerns like lacing my corset, massaging me after a rough day or whatever, shaving my legs or under my arms etc. the body worship that i engage in is not sexual either and anyone truly cogniscent of Goddess worship wouldn't automatically equate it to something sexual. maybe in online world body worship is a euphemism for subs that want to lick some pussy... next.

Virgin males (not sexual, but adds in one more sexual element) <== that's funny

hardly anything you've said thus far about my profile is overly sexual or implying sex betwixt my slaves & myself. lol so what's new?  why attempt to add that little stipulation regarding *not sexual but adds in one more sexual element* to this piss poor argument and not the others? few aspects of human life aren't sexual. we're sexual beings and that's our driving force in life.. it's rather innate in us,  but it doesn't mean we want to be approached by every being in a sexual manner. to me the ultimate height of servitude is when a male denies his innate, primal sexual drives to offer himself to me in complete supplication. virgin slaves are more pure to me in that they haven't had sex so their drive is even less about their own selfish sexual gratification and more focused on me..... next weak ass argument.

Toilet servitude

ok.. so i like to piss on people  or make them drink it. how the hell is that sexually suggestive? oh.. i forgot.. maybe toilet play is in the same sexual line of suggestively mixed message fire as boot worship, hand or glove worship in your world.


quote:

ORIGINAL: gooddogbenji

Under the listed interests, she LIVES FOR

Body worship (you've been over that.. you're being redundant)
Foot worship (you've been over that.. you're being redundant)
Strapons (you've been over that.. you're being redundant)
Cuckolding, (we've been over that too already.. still redundant)

loves

Ass play

that would fall under strapon play or electro/anal torture.. once again.. nothing is going up my ass so i don't consider that the same as the sexual intimacy i have with a lover. i don't stick electro toys up my lover's ass and shock him like a mink. but it sure is fun to stick things up my slaves' arses. still isn't coital intercourse which is what MY profile is talking about.

Vaccuum stimulation

how is that sexually suggestive? i enjoy pumping my slaves' cocks up and then performing CBT on them. it's fun torturing pumped up balls or cocks. it's not like i'm pumping them up so i can fuck them.  that doesn't say anything sexually suggestive to a slave who's about to have his cock pumped just so i can torture it or do some knife or fireplay or C/B bondage.


quote:

ORIGINAL: gooddogbenji

Well, I'm sure you get the idea.

lol only if you trying to give the idea that you have absolutely NO life or nothing better to do with your time than attempt to inadequately pick apart my profile in such an absurdly fallacious manner whilst clutching at straws to save your drowning assertions and make yourself appear to be a MasterdeBatur that you deem yourself to be.  because that's about the only idea any sane person would walk away with from your idiotic *conclusions* (for utter lack of a more apropos word).

the only reason i took the time to address each one was because you obviously adopted my profile as your new hobby for the day and took the time to attempt to pick it apart so i figured the least i could do was toss the dog a bone and address each thing you brought up.


quote:

gooddogbenji

How on earth could a sub get a mixed message?


perhaps if he was as dense as the *sub* who mixed the message up from the onset then i'm sure he could get a mixed message. anything is possible..you can lead an idiot to knowledge, but you can't make him think. it's ludicrous take an entire profile and chop it up to suit your erroneous arguments then totally negate or ignore the context from which they were drawn. you picked and chose the closet fetish/activity to anything even REMOTELY sexual so you would have the tiniest modicum of a leg to stand on with your *arguments*.

that about sums it up. your little fallacy fest you call a debate was rather amusing and definitely took my mind off my food poisoning tonight. i'm thoroughly tickled when people are incapable of proper discourse.

sit Ubu sit.....good dog






Interesting argument that things like queening, cuckolding and assplay can be explained away as non-sexual.   What Im picking up here is that it isnt the physical acts in question, but how they are processed by yourself and the sub.  If Im correct, would it be a safe assumption to say that you wouldnt mind a sub who wanted to eat you out and touch your tits and ass, as long as it was being processed as 'goddess worship' and he didnt cum from the experience?



< Message edited by marieToo -- 9/30/2006 9:01:48 AM >


_____________________________

marie.


I give good agita.









(in reply to EbonyFtshGoddess)
Profile   Post #: 57
RE: Why all submissives are all about sex?? - 9/30/2006 9:29:51 AM   
socalseeker


Posts: 3
Joined: 10/21/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BlkTallFullfig
I myself seek to be in a relationship with a slave who loves sex, because I certainly plan to use him that way.   However, if he cannot approach me as a woman with whom he can have a relationship, he will certainly never get to know about my sexuality... 


    You give me hope Ma'am

(in reply to BlkTallFullfig)
Profile   Post #: 58
RE: Why all submissives are all about sex?? - 9/30/2006 10:16:03 AM   
MisPandora


Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: socalseeker

quote:

ORIGINAL: BlkTallFullfig
I myself seek to be in a relationship with a slave who loves sex, because I certainly plan to use him that way.   However, if he cannot approach me as a woman with whom he can have a relationship, he will certainly never get to know about my sexuality... 


   You give me hope Ma'am

There are plenty of us who seek a similar situation.  Rest assured, we expect to be treated as a woman, not as the dirty ol "keeper of the pussy."

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to socalseeker)
Profile   Post #: 59
RE: Why all submissives are all about sex?? - 9/30/2006 10:26:22 AM   
lunamor


Posts: 52
Joined: 6/9/2005
Status: offline
Why should a Dom conceal or minimize her attractiveness? A Dom in beautiful fetish clothing will of course turn on a wanker as well, but it's completely unfair to blame the Dom for unsolicited sexual advances, or offers of exclusively sexual service when she clearly doesn't seek it or encourage it. Displaying her beauty and sexuality can be a wonderful source of power and energy for a Dom, it can inspire a slave to feel even more unworthy, even more adoring and submissive to a Dom's will. It's not always a not-so-covert invitation to coitus! A slave may hope to kiss a Mistress' hand or foot, he may dream of being ordered to kneel at her feet and pleasure her as best he can but he would never dare to expect or demand sexual involvement, he wouldn't even think of touching a Mistress without her permission. And that's exactly as it should be, in my opinion.

Lunamor

(in reply to MisPandora)
Profile   Post #: 60
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