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RE: Why don't doms like sissies? - 2/16/2007 7:52:08 PM

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I'm sorry, I thought the topic under discussion here was CD's??? Or do you just feel the need to attack me whereever I post, because you don't like what I want to do with my slave? So, what's up with that?

And fyi, it's a far cry between "NO" sex, and sex on MY terms.

quote:

ORIGINAL: cloudboy

quote:

ORIGINAL: FemmeOwner

Now, I don't mean this as any kind of indictment. I have nothing against sissies or CD's, etc. I just don't want to *own* one, as my personal choice.

Let us know when you find a male slave who wants no kink and no sex, but who has a burning desire to revolve around you, clean your house, run your errands, escort you to events, and rub your feet.

I have seen this kind of man. He's the de-sexed, pussy-whipped husband. The problem is that he tends to be unhappy and complaining of his wife, or if not that, living a life of quiet desperation.

< Message edited by FemmeOwner -- 2/16/2007 8:16:14 PM >

(in reply to cloudboy)

RE: Why don't doms like sissies? - 2/16/2007 10:36:19 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LotusSong

Actually, I hear you can get a sexual reassignment in Thailand for around $1500 :)

$1,500 would be a back room hack who just chops everything off and stops the bleeding. :-)

More like $10,000 to $18,000 depending on the surgeon and how in demand they are. The price of the best surgeon in Thailand is the price of most of the better ones in North America. They are in a bit of a price war since they are each others competition.

(in reply to LotusSong)

RE: Why don't doms like sissies? - 2/16/2007 11:17:57 PM

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people with fetishes are too focused on their fetishes to be of any interest to me, no matter what their fetishes are.

(in reply to skirtboy43)

RE: Why don't doms like sissies? - 2/17/2007 12:28:34 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: cloudboy

Maybe. I've got about zero (0) experience with bisexual Fs. Lesbians tend to be rather dismissive of CDs and are also not particularly interested.

"Barbi Satin" lives in my own home town and is a Shemale. We used to correspond, and according to her the best matches for her (those most inclined to connect) were other CD's, shemales, or TS's. I've always thought shemales were rather cool, but my experience with them is very limited to non existent in RT.

It does happen that trans people often can wind up with one another. It's kind of easier to relate to someone who is in a similar situation. Also if one hangs out in the community there tends to be a greater opportunity for people to meet each other in a comfortable environment where everyone knows where the other person is comming from.

There is also however cliques in the trans world. Sometimes one can wind up shunned for crossing the subtle lines of demarcation between groups. So if I said to a group of TS women that I was dating a crossdresser some of them would try and talk me out of it for various reasons and some might stop talking to me at all.

It's a complex social hierarchy in the trans world.

A lot of the crossdressers I've met are hetro though. So they are looking for women. A CWD wouldn't meet their needs since although they see the woman as a whole they see what is between her legs as the ultimate determining factor of if their relationship is gay or straight.

There also is the issue of TS trying to go stealth (not being out about their past), and being with a crossdresser or any other transperson who is either out or not 100% passible will out them by association.

What can I say but being trans in any form is complex and frought with issues.

(in reply to cloudboy)

RE: Why don't doms like sissies? - 2/17/2007 7:21:41 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: DigitBox

quote:

ORIGINAL: LotusSong

Actually, I hear you can get a sexual reassignment in Thailand for around $1500 :)

quote:

$1,500 would be a back room hack who just chops everything off and stops the bleeding. :-)

More like $10,000 to $18,000 depending on the surgeon and how in demand they are. The price of the best surgeon in Thailand is the price of most of the better ones in North America. They are in a bit of a price war since they are each others competition.

My brother lives in Thailand..he was was instrumental in helping Samatha (author of Though the Jungle) http://www.amazon.com/Through-Jungle-Travelers-Samantha-Adams/dp/0595310028/sr=1-16/qid=1171725399/ref=sr_1_16/103-8555866-2079860?ie=UTF8&s=books attain her surgery (He's the Tom she refers to in her book).

I know a bit more about this topic than you folks give me credit for.

< Message edited by LotusSong -- 2/17/2007 7:23:05 AM >

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RE: Why don't doms like sissies? - 2/17/2007 9:08:21 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: FemmeOwner

I'm sorry, I thought the topic under discussion here was CD's??? Or do you just feel the need to attack me whereever I post, because you don't like what I want to do with my slave? So, what's up with that?

And fyi, it's a far cry between "NO" sex, and sex on MY terms.

You may want to rewrite your profile which reads: "Please note: I am not looking for a sex slave, a plaything, a bottom, or a romantic partner. I am looking for a slave,"

That reads like no sex and no physical involvement to me: no play, sex, bottoming or romance.

BTW, I'm not attacking you. I am questioning the feasibility of your project, which seems very unrealistic to me. If you continue to experience disappointment and frustration, you may want to change your mission statement and goals. If you succeed, you can then crow about how wrong I have been. Either way, its a win-win situation for you.

(in reply to FemmeOwner)

RE: Why don't doms like sissies? - 2/17/2007 10:09:49 AM

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From: NYC
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G'afternoon all:

Even though I've read the entire length of the thread, I'm not going to address any points but the original post. Point by point, to be concise.

Many female dominants do not prefer sissies, myself included. It is a preference. Like anyone else, we are entitled to our preferences for whatever reasons we have.
A straight man that enjoys dressing up is NOT "the very depth of submissiveness". He's a cross dresser that wants his fetish catered to. Submission comes from the brain, not the groin. As does domination. It's about power, not sex.

I direct your attention to Merriam-Webster's online dictionary for submission;

: the condition of being submissive, humble, or compliant
: an act of submitting to the authority or control of another

Just so we're clear on the definition.

Whatever you're into? Dandy. Just find someone that shares your kink and stop whining about the rest.

P.S. - "Doms" are generally males.

Stay safe, play nice & share your toys w/ others...

Bella

_____________________________

Life shouldn't be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly shouting..."Wow! What a ride!

(in reply to skirtboy43)

RE: Why don't doms like sissies? - 2/17/2007 1:00:14 PM

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Darling,
While I appreciate the clarity of your remarks, I didn't "whine" about anything. I simply asked a question. I don't know why you, and lots of other posters, assumed some dark purpose in my question. As to the responses to the question, I'm bound to say that the most common response, "just because they do," is singularly unsatisfactory. I had hoped for something a little richer.
Skirt

_____________________________

"Whatever is done from love always occurs beyond good and evil" F. Nietzsche

(in reply to Bella1965)

RE: Why don't doms like sissies? - 2/17/2007 1:30:19 PM

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From: NYC
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G'afternoon all:

To the OP. Let's set something straight. I'm most assuredly NOT ~your~ darling. Secondly, no one is here to provide you with jack off material, hence the lack of something "richer". Thirdly, do you think you're the first sissy to bemoan the lack of interest by female dominants?

Do some research on previous threads. It becomes a whine when it's the same old song and dance. Especially when you refuse to accept accountability for your stance.

Sometimes, you just have to simply acknowledge that other people don't share your viewpoint and leave it at that. You may find it "singularly unsatisfactory" but that's just tough nuts.

Stay safe, play nice, & share your toys w/ others...

Bella

_____________________________

Life shouldn't be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly shouting..."Wow! What a ride!

(in reply to skirtboy43)

RE: Why don't doms like sissies? - 2/17/2007 1:44:58 PM

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You're still not getting it. I'm not looking for a sex slave, as that implies the main purpose of the slave is for sex. I'm not looking for a plaything, because that implies the main purpose of the slave is to play. There's no romantic love, because there's instead a different kind of love involved, and the kind of slave that I am seeking, is going to know what I'm talking about. If you don't get it, it's impossible to explain. Of course there will be sex and play... at MY time and choosing... but when you are speaking of 24/7, there is "real life" involved. It's not spending one's life nude and chained in the basement 365 days a year. At least, not for MY slave ;) My profile is carefully worded to try to keep down the clutter in my mailbox from the kinksters and wankers, and those who don't have a clue. There ARE people out there who are looking for what I am offering. Just because YOU don't want it, doesn't make it invalid, nor unrealistic. It's just not what YOU want, and is apparently beyond your ability to comprehend. Which is fine, except I don't go criticising you for what you want. I just wish you would return the favor.

And... I STILL fail to see how this has ANY bearing at all on the topic under discussion, and why you felt it necessary to bring it up here (or at all)???

And... I have no need to crow if I do succeed. I want a slave for my own purposes, and have no particular need to prove anything to anybody. I may smirk a bit ;) but crowing just isn't my style!

quote:

ORIGINAL: cloudboy

quote:

ORIGINAL: FemmeOwner
And fyi, it's a far cry between "NO" sex, and sex on MY terms.

You may want to rewrite your profile which reads: "Please note: I am not looking for a sex slave, a plaything, a bottom, or a romantic partner. I am looking for a slave,"

That reads like no sex and no physical involvement to me: no play, sex, bottoming or romance.

BTW, I'm not attacking you. I am questioning the feasibility of your project, which seems very unrealistic to me. If you continue to experience disappointment and frustration, you may want to change your mission statement and goals. If you succeed, you can then crow about how wrong I have been. Either way, its a win-win situation for you.

< Message edited by FemmeOwner -- 2/17/2007 1:46:23 PM >

(in reply to cloudboy)

RE: Why don't doms like sissies? - 2/17/2007 1:51:54 PM

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From: Portland, OR
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Echoing most of what was written, I'll toss in a few cents.

Everyone has their tastes, and interests. Sissies and crossdressing men, in general, are pretty common, and usually have specific motivations. The problem is that the fantasy is often one sided; a dominant woman who wishes to own a girl can always simply acquire a female submissive if she wishes. If a man wishes to be 'forced' to be female, how can he possibly demand she force him? It ranks up there with a female submissive complaining her dominant won't fantasy rape her; who'd be raping who??

A more important element is that this fetish (like many) aren't based in the context of a relationship, thus it becomes an activity not an expression of love or devotion. Doesn't the demonstration of devotion as a slave fall apart become cheap, when it's clear that the submissive in question will 'express' that devotion to any woman who snaps her fingers?

I don't like golf. If my slave wants to demonstrate her devotion to me, she'd do well not to demand to show it, by trying to push me to play golf with her. This doesn't mean I'm not willing to learn to play golf, because it'd be a fun activity for us to share; but I wouldn't be enjoying the game because I have an inherent love of golf. If golf is that important to her, she's better off submitting to a man she knows is a golfer, instead of complaining that I don't share her interest.

The heart of the issue isn't related to golf, cross dressing, sissies, or any other fetish. It's based on the distinction of 'what you want to do' vice 'who you want to do it with.'

Regards, and my apologies if I stepped on any high heeled toes.

Stephan

_____________________________

Nosce Te Ipsum

"The blade itself incites to violence" - Homer

Men: Find a Woman here

(in reply to Bella1965)

RE: Why don't doms like sissies? - 2/17/2007 3:09:04 PM

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Joined: 2/9/2007
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Darling,
I call you "darling" because in this environment I get to choose the titles (if you don't like it, well, "tough nuts")! My question isn't a whine because I didn't read past versions of this topic. I didn't do so because I was unaware they existed. Had I been, I probably would not have read them. I tend to live in the here and now. I think that if you don't think about why, or how, you are as you, you're not being human. Through some evolution, and the odd bit of blind luck, I find myself able to think about myself. MMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Darling!
Skirt Boy

_____________________________

"Whatever is done from love always occurs beyond good and evil" F. Nietzsche

(in reply to Bella1965)

RE: Why don't doms like sissies? - 2/17/2007 3:11:58 PM

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Joined: 12/12/2006
From: NYC
Status: offline

G'afternoon all:

Thank you Stephan for summing it up so well. You've expressed it quite accurately and succinctly. By the way, not all of us wear high heels.

Some of us gals like to beat the snots out of our subs in flannel jammies and pink fuzzy bunny slippers.

Stay safe, play nice, & share your toys w/ others...

Bella

_____________________________

Life shouldn't be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly shouting..."Wow! What a ride!

(in reply to Stephann)

RE: Why don't doms like sissies? - 2/17/2007 3:20:16 PM

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From: NYC
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G'evening all:

To the OP. Well then, you've displayed characteristics that dominant females will instantly rule you out for. No wonder you're whining. Laziness, self centered, self-absorbed, etc. I strongly suggest you seek out the services of a pro-domme so you can get your fetish fulfilled.

Oy vey. You would be well off to read Stephann's post closely and learn from it.

Just a note to the OP, welcome to my blocked list. The forums will be a brighter place for not seeing your posts.

Stay safe, play nice, and share your toys w/ others...

Bella

_____________________________

Life shouldn't be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly shouting..."Wow! What a ride!

(in reply to skirtboy43)

RE: Why don't doms like sissies? - 2/17/2007 3:23:56 PM

Highheelfetish20

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They do just not the kink.

(in reply to FemmeOwner)

RE: Why don't doms like sissies? - 2/17/2007 3:24:24 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Bella1965

G'evening all:

To the OP. Well then, you've displayed characteristics that dominant females will instantly rule you out for. No wonder you're whining. Laziness, self centered, self-absorbed, etc. I strongly suggest you seek out the services of a pro-domme so you can get your fetish fulfilled. Oy vey. You would be well off to read Stephann's post closely and learn from it.

Just a note to the OP, welcome to my blocked list. The forums will be a brighter place for not seeing your posts.

Stay safe, play nice, and share your toys w/ others...

Bella

This is exactly what I've been thinking.

Skirtboy43, I haven't seen anything from you at all that even suggests you are interested in more than your clothes and personally I don't know any dominants who find that attractive in a bottom or sub regardless of sex or gender.

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And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to Bella1965)

RE: Why don't doms like sissies? - 2/17/2007 3:24:42 PM

Posts: 4214
Joined: 12/27/2006
From: Portland, OR
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Bella1965

G'afternoon all:

Thank you Stephan for summing it up so well. You've expressed it quite accurately and succinctly. By the way, not all of us wear high heels. Some of us gals like to beat the snots out of our subs in flannel jammies and pink fuzzy bunny slippers.

Stay safe, play nice, & share your toys w/ others...

Bella

Actually, I had intended to write "High heeled boot toes" since that's a personal fetish of mine. I know I'm no less dominant, myself, when I'm administering a spanking while wearing sneakers; I just feel better in black Dickies or Cats.

Stephan

_____________________________

Nosce Te Ipsum

"The blade itself incites to violence" - Homer

Men: Find a Woman here

(in reply to Bella1965)

RE: Why don't doms like sissies? - 2/17/2007 4:57:48 PM

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A thought for the OP to ponder - addressing someone respectfully, regardless of how they identify in terms of the D/s spectrum, is always a good idea. If you refuse to respect other's wishes (in terms of how they wish to be addressed) then it's very unlikely that you will ever be considered as anything other than a bratty bottom.
In general, it's best to not use terms of endearment such as "dear," "darling," "sweetie," "sweetheart," etc. until you are given permission. As for other things (like "ma'am" "miss" etc), if a person shows a perference, it's best to pay attention. Even if it's not someone that you are interested in as a potential partner - Dominants do talk to each other, and (for me) showing a lack of respect to an aquaintance of mine will get a boy removed from consideration (and we know others who feel the same way).

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(in reply to Stephann)

RE: Why don't doms like sissies? - 2/17/2007 6:53:23 PM

Mikal

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I just jumped in, so if this has been addressed, by appologies. skirtboy, are you asking why female dominants don't like sissies or why male dominants don't? (Dom is generally a male term, but you've posted in the Mistress section).

If you are wanting a Domme's opinion: personally, I don't have a problem with crossdressers *shrugs*, but I won't share my clothes or makeup

.
If you are wanting a Dom's opinion: I think it has to do with the fact that men in general want biological women, if it's a women they want. I have no idea on the gay scene.

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RE: Why don't doms like sissies? - 2/17/2007 6:56:03 PM

FelinePersuasion

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I don't want a sissy cause if I wanted a woman I'd date a woman, I don't want feminine or womaly like men. I want masuline manly men.

< Message edited by FelinePersuasion -- 2/17/2007 6:57:18 PM >

(in reply to Mikal)

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