quote:

ORIGINAL: agirl

In addition........Regardless of MY trust in them...........I don't wish to meet anyone who doesn't trust ME with basic information.

quote:

ORIGINAL: KatyLied

Is it wrong that this thread makes me think of John Edward Robinson

quote:

ORIGINAL: SusanofO

I did once try to Google his number and came up with nothing. I didn't ask for his driver's license number (someone recommended I ask for his license plate number on his car(guess I said driver's license, I meant plate), because he was picking me up at the airport. I was debating doing that, but at this point, I probably would have asked for that, too. He has managed to completely freak me out with his unwillingness to meet me halfway in this instance - and so be it. His choice, although I'd really love to know the whole story about why - this just makes no sense to me, really, and it does stike me as domineering, and not very safety conscious (I mean concerned for my safety). But I am finished negotoiating for my own safety.

The not looking at him thing was something he asked if I was willing to do, not forced upon me, but it was a wee bit extreme, maybe, for a first meet thing. I dunno. I did agree to it.

He said he's had trouble with "female stalkers". I said:  "Well then - don't give me this information - and see how much I stalk you."

Hell my ex-Domnant beat the holy crap ot of me last fall - and he already knows that. He said well, my prosecuting my ex-Dominant (which my sister, who is an attonrey, made me do, I wasn't initially going to prosecute and made the msitake of telling her what happened. She threatened to tell my father, unless I took him to court. He got a $500 fine - no jail time.)

Anyway, this guy I've been e-mailing and phoning, and was supposed to visit on Monday, said that this "Proves I am already "litigious". Well. Maybe he'd be tempted to be "litigious", too, if someone threw him backwards down a flight of stairs, and tried to break his ribs, by kicking him repeartedly.  If "litigious" isn't going to be a problem for him, then he doesn't have anything to worry about, right?

This is complete bullshit, IMO.
He should know enough to know that asking for this basic information is advice in every piece of safety precautionary advice I've ever read for submissives. He did tell me he had two friends I could call, but that doesn't strike me as half as reliable method for gauging safety, frankly. And he didn't offfer until I broght this up. I mean, let's face it, none of of this onfo is fool-proof. He seems to be telling me to "just trust him"  - Well hey - why can't he "just trust me" instead, maybe?

I've known him about yes, 9-10- weeks. We've chatted and talked on the phone, and e-mailed. He was nice. I am not totally paranoid - but I am not an idiot. I am sure he considers me totally unreasonable - but that's his pride talking, if he does.

Because I am a nice person, he shall remain nameless (and I'd prefer if anyone knows his name, or what he says is his name, anyway, that they not mention it, for his sake). I am just such an idiot.  

All I ever asked for was his last name and street address. I am out $250. I also put a deposit on a week at a motel. I fully expected to get this info, too, before I left. I cancelled my trip. He wrote me this morning, and he is still unwilling to part with this very basic information.

Perhaps he feels insulted because we did share a "connection" of sorts, he was planning things for us to do, etc.  But - I am sorry. I am not going there. I should have known better - I should have insisted on this information a whole lot sooner.

I need to take a nap. I am so depressed about this. Thanks for the ear, everyone who wrote - I appreciate the ear and advice.

-Susan