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my Master doesn't fuck me. - 10/6/2008 9:29:53 AM   
ownedandnotused


Posts: 6
Joined: 10/6/2008
Status: offline 		Good morning,
i have decided to create this screenname, for the purpose of coming on here, and asking for help or advice.
i am an owned submissive, who has been owned for over one year. My Master and i have a great relationship, and it is my hope that we will continue to do so, and that i will remain His, for a long time to come.- Yet, in all of this time, He has never fucked my cunt or ass, with His cock.- why?

We live apart, yet spend an average of a weekend a month together. He is present in my everyday life: i don't eat without His permission, i don't pee without His permission, i don't consume alcoholic beverages, nor have any sweets without His permission, among other things that i may not do without His permission. He has guided me into finding the Peace that there is in being accepting of my nature, and in serving a Man who will use me, without hesitation....as His property, footstool,table, whore, slut, bitch...drinking His pee. He uses me, abuses me, humiliates me and leaves me on my knees begging for more everytime...and i love it.
As time has gone by, i have found that i am dependent on Him, for many things, particularly my own mental wellbeing....i'm not saying that i'm mentally not balanced without Him :) ... i'm saying that i am mentally at peace, when i know that He is pleased. However...for a long time now...i have felt not worthy of Him, not doing enough, not good enough...because it is the only reason that i can think of, for Him to not be fucking me.

He is handsome, single, young, intelligent...and says that He simply doesn't have the need to fuck. He is physically healthy....
He is also poly- which i'm absolutely fine with. In our time together, He had a short term relationship with another girl, but no others since then. He has told me that He also did not fuck her...and when i asked if He would fuck His next girl...He said that He wasn't sure. i'm not certain how to take that....

As i write this...i feel disoriented and am not sure that my words are making much sense.i'm not a beauty queen, but i'm an average looking girl, height /weight proportional, who takes care of my appearance...i have found myself hating my own body..trying to change little things that maybe He doesn't like...i feel that this is affecting my self worth...and i have never had low self esteem...nor high either...but i have always valued myself for who i am.

i love my Master. Not just because He is my Master...but because He is a great Man. There is no worse feeling than to know that my cunt and ass are not worthy of being used by Him.

i'm not looking for a solution- i am looking to understand and accept. Any insight, thoughts, advice...will be read carefully and thought of.
Thank You so much for Your time.
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: my Master doesn't fuck me. - 10/6/2008 9:37:35 AM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline 		And I ask the same thing as always.
Have you asked him?  Have you told him?
 
the.dark.

_____________________________
RC&dc


love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

(in reply to ownedandnotused)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: my Master doesn't fuck me. - 10/6/2008 9:37:41 AM   
bound4more


Posts: 128
Joined: 10/3/2008
Status: offline 		A duck is a duck no matter what angle we look at it from. Any desire on your part for your Master to be other than exactly who he is, or to act exactly as he does, can only result in your unhappiness and frustration. You want a Master who uses you sexually? Sounds like the one you're with ain't the one for you, no matter how much you love him.

_____________________________

You can tell who someone really is by how they act

(in reply to ownedandnotused)
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RE: my Master doesn't fuck me. - 10/6/2008 9:42:12 AM   
AMaster


Posts: 814
Joined: 8/4/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: bound4more

A duck is a duck no matter what angle we look at it from. Any desire on your part for your Master to be other than exactly who he is, or to act exactly as he does, can only result in your unhappiness and frustration. You want a Master who uses you sexually? Sounds like the one you're with ain't the one for you, no matter how much you love him.


I agree. Sad, but true.

(in reply to bound4more)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: my Master doesn't fuck me. - 10/6/2008 9:45:08 AM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

Yet, in all of this time, He has never fucked my cunt or ass, with His cock.- why?


You are asking strangers to give an answer for something only one person can answer?

My advice...ask him

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If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.


(in reply to ownedandnotused)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: my Master doesn't fuck me. - 10/6/2008 9:45:48 AM   
monywildcat


Posts: 452
Joined: 2/26/2008
Status: offline 		What bound4more said...

We can speculate all day long as to the reason(s) you aren't being used in this way by your Master, but he is going to be the one that holds the answers to your questions.  It sounds like you asked before and the response you got was "I don't have the need to fuck"?  And that he is also poly, meaning he has some sort of relationship with someone else?  Perhaps that is the reason that he doesn't have the need to fuck you, because he has someone else to fill that need?  Just sayin', didn't mean to sound harsh, I made my coffee extra strong today. 

If this is what you need, and you aren't getting it, then you have some choices to make.  Either go along with the program knowing that intercourse is not going to happen, or find someone that is going to include this in your service.  I wish you well. 

_____________________________

Major Life Change Necessitates Personal Reinvention...

(in reply to bound4more)
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RE: my Master doesn't fuck me. - 10/6/2008 9:48:04 AM   
apiercedkitty


Posts: 569
Joined: 2/22/2007
From: Michigan
Status: offline 		~FR~
 
i agree that you should ask HIM. Why have you waited a year if this is a problem for you?

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normal is a setting on a washing machine...

(in reply to IrishMist)
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RE: my Master doesn't fuck me. - 10/6/2008 9:51:49 AM   
subtee


Posts: 5133
Joined: 7/26/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ownedandnotused

Good morning,
i love my Master. Not just because He is my Master...but because He is a great Man. There is no worse feeling than to know that my cunt and ass are not worthy of being used by Him.

i'm not looking for a solution- i am looking to understand and accept. Any insight, thoughts, advice...will be read carefully and thought of.
Thank You so much for Your time.


Good morning;

I don't think that you should assume any unworthiness. If you want to try to accept, I would suggest you assume that he has with you the relationship he wants to have; you must be pleasing to him since he's owned you for over a year. Can you accept that?

_____________________________

Don't believe everything you think...

(in reply to ownedandnotused)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: my Master doesn't fuck me. - 10/6/2008 9:52:14 AM   
ownedandnotused


Posts: 6
Joined: 10/6/2008
Status: offline 		i have asked Him, and we have talked about it. With Him telling me that it is simply something that He does not need to do, and we also discuss the concern that He had regarding birth control. After discussing and addressing that, nothing has changed and if that were one of the major concerns...i don't see how that would affect Him using my ass.

i have both feet on the ground and live in the real world...i'm not -by far- an expert on anything...and although i have lived more than half of my life, within this lifestyle..i haven't even made a dent on what there is to learn and compreehend. i say that, because i would understand if He simply said that He doesn't have that need...but when we are together...He orders me to beg Him to fuck me...over and over and over again..and in His communication with me, verbal and written, He talks about it as if He is , indeed, fucking me.

i'm not someone who needs to be used sexually- as confusing as that may sound, after sharing all of this...i just want to understand what is wrong with me, that He won't. 
The irony...is that all of this has me on a constant mindfuck...

(in reply to RCdc)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: my Master doesn't fuck me. - 10/6/2008 9:55:17 AM   
IrishMist


Posts: 7480
Joined: 11/17/2005
Status: offline
quote:

just want to understand what is wrong with me, that He won't. 

quote:

  it is simply something that He does not need to do,

You have your answer right there. Quit stressing about it.

_____________________________

If I said something to offend you, please tell me what it was so that I can say it again later.


(in reply to ownedandnotused)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: my Master doesn't fuck me. - 10/6/2008 9:55:59 AM   
ownedandnotused


Posts: 6
Joined: 10/6/2008
Status: offline 		:) ...you made me both smile...and cry... thank you :)

That..is what He tells me...that i am pleasing to Him in everyway.... adding "slavegirl, do you think that I would drive 300 miles everytime to come see you, if you were not pleasing to me?"...

(in reply to subtee)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: my Master doesn't fuck me. - 10/6/2008 10:01:22 AM   
RCdc


Posts: 8674
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ownedandnotused

i have asked Him, and we have talked about it. With Him telling me that it is simply something that He does not need to do, and we also discuss the concern that He had regarding birth control. After discussing and addressing that, nothing has changed and if that were one of the major concerns...i don't see how that would affect Him using my ass.

i have both feet on the ground and live in the real world...i'm not -by far- an expert on anything...and although i have lived more than half of my life, within this lifestyle..i haven't even made a dent on what there is to learn and compreehend. i say that, because i would understand if He simply said that He doesn't have that need...but when we are together...He orders me to beg Him to fuck me...over and over and over again..and in His communication with me, verbal and written, He talks about it as if He is , indeed, fucking me.

i'm not someone who needs to be used sexually- as confusing as that may sound, after sharing all of this...i just want to understand what is wrong with me, that He won't. 
The irony...is that all of this has me on a constant mindfuck...


Maybe he is enjoying the mindfuck?
Hunni - its nothing you have done.  He has already made that clear even though you cannot see that.  He has explained to you.  That is all cool.  Using your ass isn't an option.  He doesn't need to.
That is all you need to know.
 
Now, what you have to do is accept that or tell him the issue is too much for you and consider seperating.
You accept his decisions or you do not.
 
the.dark.

_____________________________
RC&dc


love isnt gazing into each others eyes - it's looking forward in the same direction

(in reply to ownedandnotused)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: my Master doesn't fuck me. - 10/6/2008 10:18:06 AM   
MasterBowline


Posts: 4
Joined: 10/4/2008
Status: offline 		Dear owned,
 
Does he penetrate you with any objects or toys.  Perhaps that could be something that he would incorporate into your routine which could give you the feeling you desire of being fucked.  Also...I was curious if he achieves any type of sexual release through oral or manual stimulation.  Thats a different question altogether about whether his desire to dominate you has anything to do with physical sexual feelings or just feelings of control & the more mental aspects. Perhaps he feels that fucking you is an activity in which he is serving you (or performing for you) and that does not meet his definition of your roles.  I do know that it can be very difficult for you to give of yourself and tell yourself that it does not matter that you desire to be fucked when all along there is this nagging desire and insecurity raging in your mind.  You have no difficiency! Obviously your Master enjoys you and wants you (or he wouldn't keep you around).  You seem to feel that because he is not fucking you, you have gained this insecurity...in fact, it is more likely that this insecurity already existed...and you have chosen to concentrate your insecurity on this one act (penetration) alone. 

(in reply to RCdc)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: my Master doesn't fuck me. - 10/6/2008 10:20:24 AM   
SteelofUtah


Posts: 5307
Joined: 10/2/2007
From: St George Utah
Status: offline 		Sex, although commonly not the case, is not something that a Master needs from his slave, there are times that all that is necessary for a Dominant to be happy is the knowledge that his submissive serves him completely.

Let go of the expectations and just enjoy what you have. if sexual needs become to great sit down and discuss your NEEDS to your Master.

A good friend on this board opened my eyes to a BEAUTIFUL belief system that I have adopted as my own because it suites my needs and make sence to me.

"The Order in which a Master sets priority is as thuss:

First a slaves NEEDS are met
Then a Masters NEEDS are met
Then the Masters WANTS are met
Finally the slaves WANTS are met

In this when my slave informs me of something she needs that I am not fulfilling then I need to make sure that needs is realized quickly with this format I know that my slave may want for much but she needs for nothing. It also makes sure I evaluate the situation and make sure I am not taking advantage of fortune. I believe that I only have what I have because I am worthy of it, otherwise I don't deserve it.

Steel

_____________________________

Just Steel
Resident Therapeutic Metallurgist
The Steel Warm-Up © ™
For the Uber Posters
Thanks for the Grammatical support : ) ~ Term

(in reply to RCdc)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: my Master doesn't fuck me. - 10/6/2008 10:21:52 AM   
ownedandnotused


Posts: 6
Joined: 10/6/2008
Status: offline 		i accept, and trust His decisions.

(in reply to RCdc)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: my Master doesn't fuck me. - 10/6/2008 10:27:53 AM   
ElectraGlide


Posts: 1246
Joined: 11/25/2005
From: Maryland
Status: offline 		Sounds like a typical Poly situation, you are fulfilling his needs in one way, while the lady he is fucking is fulfilling that need. I have never been Poly and I dont knock it, but I have a little bit of a understanding about it. While a lot of Poly Families are happy, some get the short end of the deal.

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www.starhillcreations.com

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Profile   Post #: 16
RE: my Master doesn't fuck me. - 10/6/2008 10:29:35 AM   
ownedandnotused


Posts: 6
Joined: 10/6/2008
Status: offline 		Thank you so much, to all of you who have taken the time out of your day, to sit here and read this, and tell me what you think.

i can't help but feel silly that i posted this- but it is a very real thing that i am feeling, and didn't know quite how to handle it.
Also, it saddens me to know that i came on here to ask this...without Him knowing...i don't think that He would be very proud of me, for doing this.

For those who wrote that i have focused on this one thing...You are right, and i am ashamed to have done so. My Master claims to be pleased with me, and that should be enough for me. i need to focus on how it is that He has used me, versus on what He has chosen not to do. Most importantly...i need to remind myself that it is His choice to use me however He desires.

(in reply to SteelofUtah)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: my Master doesn't fuck me. - 10/6/2008 10:37:12 AM   
apiercedkitty


Posts: 569
Joined: 2/22/2007
From: Michigan
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ownedandnotused

i accept, and trust His decisions.



Just my opinion, but if you had accepted and trusted, would you be questioning? Something to think about. It really sounds to me like you need to sit him down, or write a detailed email, and explain what you have expressed here - that you're feeling like something is missing, that you WANT to be fucked - if, in fact, you do.

_____________________________

normal is a setting on a washing machine...

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Profile   Post #: 18
RE: my Master doesn't fuck me. - 10/6/2008 10:40:50 AM   
Subductrssss


Posts: 97
Joined: 9/28/2008
Status: offline 		I went through the same thing with a NON BDSM D/s man who turned out to be a pedophile, I left but before I did he did a damn good job of taking away my womanhood and reducing me to a thing and he did indeed "break me" something no one nor no other circumstance in life did.  I would say if YOU truly are happy with the way it is have at it, if you have ANY doubt or disatisfaction either get what YOU want or get out and find another who can give you want you want and need.

To a lot of women, me included, sex is inherent with being found sexy, being loved and wanted, I myself would say get out before you have to spend the time and money I did on therapy to find out there is nothing wrong with me.

((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))))

_____________________________

Subductrssss

The reality of the other person lies not in what he reveals to you but in what he cannot reveal to you. Therefore, if you would understand him, listen not to what he says but rather to what he does not say.
Kahlil Gibran

(in reply to ownedandnotused)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: my Master doesn't fuck me. - 10/6/2008 10:59:18 AM   
ownedandnotused


Posts: 6
Joined: 10/6/2008
Status: offline 		This was a mistake...to come on here and post this question...has lead my Master to think that what He has told me, is not enough.
Today, i'm writing the report about our last weekend together...and know what that mentally and emotionally can do to me...and i know better than to do anything like this.
My Master has never hung up the phone on me...until right now. i could hear the disapointment, and even hurt in His voice...as well as how upset He is.
i have been foolish...very foolish...

(in reply to Subductrssss)
Profile   Post #: 20
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