RE: What do you think of all the dommes seeking "generous" men?

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RE: What do you think of all the dommes seeking "g... - 4/5/2009 6:08:02 AM

dennidson

Posts: 22
Joined: 12/9/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

Did you ever think, dennidson, that you could avoid that whole issue by going to a r/t event rather than trying to meet people through messenger? Just a thought.

I would but I don't know of any in my area

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RE: What do you think of all the dommes seeking "g... - 4/5/2009 6:09:46 AM

dennidson

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Joined: 12/9/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

Have you ever just flat out, up front, made it perfectly clear............"I am not spending one red cent on you until we meet in person......not giving anyone/thing a credit card number, not buying anyone I don't know personally anything. I just want to get to know you. Get to know the fabulous woman I imagine you to be" ?

Seems to me, immediate disclosure would end a lot of wasting of your precious time.

If they get pissy or offended, chances are, it is your $$ they wanted anyway. No harm, no foul.

Good point

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RE: What do you think of all the dommes seeking "g... - 4/5/2009 6:10:25 AM

LadyPact

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How can it be that I am the biggest computer twit on the planet, but even I've heard of google?

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RE: What do you think of all the dommes seeking "g... - 4/5/2009 6:15:20 AM

LaTigresse

Posts: 26123
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I would guess that there is a laziness factor combined with a lack of interest in RT.

It's all good when they can get their jollies off, on the deep dark secret internet.

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RE: What do you think of all the dommes seeking "g... - 4/5/2009 6:16:29 AM

Domin8tingUrDrmz

Posts: 1269
Joined: 4/8/2006
From: Portland Metro, Oregon
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While I get tired of hearing whiny boys bashing women who want generous men, I'll be nice.

http://www.drkdesyre.com/meetppl/orgs/orgsoregon.html

Yeah, that's the Oregon list, but if ya click on one of the other links you can find something in your state/country. It isn't always up to date, but it does have a lot of current locations and events.

Edited to add: That wasn't in reply to you LadyPact...just hit the wrong button.

< Message edited by Domin8tingUrDrmz -- 4/5/2009 6:19:46 AM >

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RE: What do you think of all the dommes seeking "g... - 4/5/2009 6:22:41 AM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
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No problem. The replies start flying fast when it's early and so many of us are offering a clue by four.

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RE: What do you think of all the dommes seeking "g... - 4/5/2009 6:29:47 AM

kttqnp

Posts: 118
Joined: 1/21/2009
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Ok, I think we have two different levels of discussion going on here, IMHO. dennidson, I can understand why you would be dismayed by the "bait-and-switch" types who want your credit card number to cam. But is that happening when you are chatting up the Bondage Barbies who have unbelievably hot profiles? As they say, if it seems too good to be true, it probably is. I have absolutely nothing against women who have a hot commodity and wish to capitalize on it, but as an adult male, you should have developed some sense for these ladies by now, I would think. And you won't just find them here.

The second level of discussion seems to be about women's desire to be treated like they are someone special. And yes, making women feel special sometimes involves gifts. On this subject, I think it's really the thought that counts. I'm more thrilled by a bouquet of pink carnations from someone who really cares than I would be about a dozen long-stemmed roses from someone just trying to get into my pants.

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RE: What do you think of all the dommes seeking "g... - 4/5/2009 6:39:46 AM

openmindedslave

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Recently , A new Mistress on Cm has been writing to me sharring her first observations on what she has found out here since joining . Taking some of what she has sharred with me here involving this forum

When she has met for a first meeting at a coffee shop, she had a few that would have already ordered their drink before getting there and when she would arrive would sit there talking to her with out even the consderation to offer to buy her a coffee until she mentions she would like one.

She had people contact her who would like to spend the evening with her and she would mention dinner first and one insisted she could make it there. Another suggested ordering a pizza . These are men in their 40's to 60's here, not some poor college kid.

Another , who she had not met yet but spoke to on the phone for several weeks earlier had made plans due see her because his company was moving him into the area. Seemed good start here. He sadly was fired due to the economy at the alast moment. His response was he could come and live on her sofa as her slave. Remember they never met yet .

Guys will come to her with all these kinks and show her stuff she can buy on the internet to make these fetishes and fantasys a reality for them, yet they are not willing to invest in these items other than to say" you should get this. "

Does any of this sound familar? Is it really wrong to go out to dinner with someone before you get involved. Do we wounder really why more people have to express their desire to say somethings you might want are going to cost. he hotel rroms dont come free. The idea of toys just appearing out of thin air or being born wearing thigh high boots is just not the norm. There are some out here that clearly want ot be paid for their services and they should be up front about it. But many just want to be shown a little kindness if you both connect. Thats all..

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RE: What do you think of all the dommes seeking "g... - 4/5/2009 6:43:40 AM

LadyLupineNYC

Posts: 618
Joined: 12/14/2006
From: NYC
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quote:

ORIGINAL: kttqnp

Ok, I think we have two different levels of discussion going on here, IMHO. dennidson, I can understand why you would be dismayed by the "bait-and-switch" types who want your credit card number to cam. But is that happening when you are chatting up the Bondage Barbies who have unbelievably hot profiles? As they say, if it seems too good to be true, it probably is. I have absolutely nothing against women who have a hot commodity and wish to capitalize on it, but as an adult male, you should have developed some sense for these ladies by now, I would think. And you won't just find them here.

Yes yes...but don't you realize that they all deserve said women?

I see it all the time in profiles 'looking for a beautiful women...' and how, exactly are you defining this...?

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RE: What do you think of all the dommes seeking "g... - 4/5/2009 6:48:26 AM

kttqnp

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LadyLupine, I'm new here, but yes, I do realize they all want Pamela Anderson in leather, fulfilling their little do-me checklists!

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RE: What do you think of all the dommes seeking "g... - 4/5/2009 6:50:15 AM

MmeGigs

Posts: 706
Joined: 1/26/2008
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Tslaveboy
Sounds like high school. Does he have a car? Did he buy you a ring? Did he take you out (as in spending money on a date)?

I guess things don't change much for us guys.

They've certainly changed for us gals, if the cmails I get are any indication. In high school, a fellow would at least introduce himself and engage in a little conversation, maybe take me out on a date, before asking for a blow-job. Here, the vast majority of fellows who contact me ask for specific sexual favors before they even say hello. I understand that it's the same for most dominant women here.

The OP's profile includes a list of things he wants done to him. He's not interested in serving, isn't looking for a relationship, and isn't willing to pay. He's basically looking for the services of a professional dominatrix without the fees. His complaint about women asking for money looks a lot like the pot calling the kettle black to me.

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RE: What do you think of all the dommes seeking "g... - 4/5/2009 6:56:10 AM

Domin8tingUrDrmz

Posts: 1269
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It's nice to see a statement like this from the male perspective. It puts a glimmer of hope out there for those of us women who sometimes get jaded. So, for that, thank you for your comments openmindedslave.

To the others who complain about such things, I view it this way. I'm in this for MY jollies! If you happen to enjoy my jollies, fanfrickintastic! If you don't, than you had best hope you enjoy seeing me enjoy myself, or move along. While I'm not a pay for play type of person, the women who are probably also are in this for their happiness (and perhaps for monetary gain), but if you don't like it...move along. Whining about it will NOT change it.

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RE: What do you think of all the dommes seeking "g... - 4/5/2009 6:57:19 AM

kttqnp

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Speaking of our OP, he's been absent from the discussion for quite some time. Wonder if he got the answer he was looking for?

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RE: What do you think of all the dommes seeking "g... - 4/5/2009 6:59:47 AM

LadyLupineNYC

Posts: 618
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I mostly agree except that a Professional Dominatrix who is actually worth her salt wouldn't agree to sex because then she would be a prositute (by legal definition- I am NOT looking to this becoming yet another 'ProDommes are all whores bash thread). For someone to actually craft and interesting scene that is skilled and caters to the s-type's interests without regard for her own personal BDSM interests, than yes, he should actually go out into the real world and pay. Suggesting that some one only interested in kinky sex (as the OP basically is) is looking for and should go to a ProDomme just gets us right back into 'well, she is just a whore, anyway' mentality that suggests that since a man has paid he can now both expect and demand sex. Shame on him! He has paid for a fantasy to be fulfilled and her time and skill. If someone is looking for kinky sex, than find a kinky g/f or find a kink-friendly escort who caters to that (actually harder than you might think).

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RE: What do you think of all the dommes seeking "g... - 4/5/2009 7:14:54 AM

Domin8tingUrDrmz

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RE: What do you think of all the dommes seeking "g... - 4/5/2009 7:19:27 AM

CarrieO

Posts: 2432
Joined: 1/27/2008
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: openmindedslave

Recently , A new Mistress on Cm has been writing to me sharring her first observations on what she has found out here since joining . Taking some of what she has sharred with me here involving this forum

When she has met for a first meeting at a coffee shop, she had a few that would have already ordered their drink before getting there and when she would arrive would sit there talking to her with out even the consderation to offer to buy her a coffee until she mentions she would like one.

She had people contact her who would like to spend the evening with her and she would mention dinner first and one insisted she could make it there. Another suggested ordering a pizza . These are men in their 40's to 60's here, not some poor college kid.

Another , who she had not met yet but spoke to on the phone for several weeks earlier had made plans due see her because his company was moving him into the area. Seemed good start here. He sadly was fired due to the economy at the alast moment. His response was he could come and live on her sofa as her slave. Remember they never met yet .

Guys will come to her with all these kinks and show her stuff she can buy on the internet to make these fetishes and fantasys a reality for them, yet they are not willing to invest in these items other than to say" you should get this. "

Does any of this sound familar? Is it really wrong to go out to dinner with someone before you get involved. Do we wounder really why more people have to express their desire to say somethings you might want are going to cost. he hotel rroms dont come free. The idea of toys just appearing out of thin air or being born wearing thigh high boots is just not the norm. There are some out here that clearly want ot be paid for their services and they should be up front about it. But many just want to be shown a little kindness if you both connect. Thats all..

Have we spoken?!
Except for the offer of a "couch slave", I've dealt with all of these examples...as I'm sure many others have. I've even had one man I met for coffee cut right to the point and tell me what he expected now that we had gotten the "damn first meeting" taken care of...after all he did buy me coffee (not what I asked for but in his words "at least I bought it for you"). When I told him he needed to work on his manners, what was his response.... "If you wanted manners you should have said that in your profile."

I think so many people forget that until any parameters are laid out, your just two people meeting and getting to know one another. Manners, courtesy and yes, generosity can go a long way in making the right impression. When I say I like generous people, it doesn't mean I expect expensive gifts or anything like that. It means I like a person to be generous with the time they spend on me...not just money and pretty things.

A good thing to remember....."If a gentleman has ability, he is magnanimous, generous, tolerant, and straightforward, through which he opens the way to instruct others. "

OP.....you mention a "wish list" you saw on a profile, would it be safe to say you also have a "wish list" of your own on your profile. If what you want is kinky sex, given that you really have no interest in service outside the bedroom, how are you any different then the women you complain about?

BTW.....I buy my own coffee and give myself flowers now!

< Message edited by CarrieO -- 4/5/2009 7:31:53 AM >

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RE: What do you think of all the dommes seeking "g... - 4/5/2009 7:19:33 AM

YoungBlondeSlave

Posts: 953
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Newsensation

Hi all. I've noticed that there are a lot of domme women on this site seeking submissive men who are "generous". I'm not talking about the professional dommes who advertise here, I'm looking more at the non pros. I'm just curious to see what others think about this? Personally, it seems to me that many of these women are on here simply to take advantage of naive men whom they have no intention of actually doing anything with in person. There was even one profile I saw where the girl (she was about 20, so she was a girl!) had a "wish list" of items listed that she was hoping people would buy for her. I don't know... I suppose financial submission is a legitemate form of this lifestyle, but as a sub guy I get rather annoyed and offended by this.

Okay, seriously, why are you complaining about this? Yes, financial submission is a legitimate form of submission in this lifestyle. Apparently it's not your cup of tea, move on.

i'm sure every sub/slave on this site has been approached (or has seen a profile) regarding financial submission/slavery. Just click the little button with the right and left arrows that indicate your being able to see the next profile in line.

i can only imagine your frustration in constantly seeing wish lists from Dommes popping up. But, at least it's right there, in your face. For everyone to see. No surprises.

Though i agree with another poster (i can't remember his name, my apologies) that no one should be asking for anything in regards to anyone's credit...history or credit card number to prove that they are in fact, real.

i mean, what person (Dom/me or otherwise) not only feels that it's okay to ask about my credit score, financial security and the status of my savings after ten minutes of conversation but gets offended when i ignore the question (yes, i actually had this conversation with one member of CM this week)?

Needless to say, the conversation went downhill after that.

Just do what we all do, mumble and grumble to ourselves about the audacity of some the people here and move on to the next profile or the next e-mail.

Sorry if my train of thought derailed anywhere...going on 26 hours of being awake, insomnia effing sucks.

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RE: What do you think of all the dommes seeking "g... - 4/5/2009 7:26:29 AM

GotSteel

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I agree with you ladies that there are a lot of sad male subs, I even get emails from them sometimes

what part of straight don't they understand. Maybe there are dommes who's profiles can be interpreted less than ideally because of this (shrug). But there are also scammers and gold diggers of both the domme, dom and sub persuasion. Should the OP be ridiculed for looking for a domme on a dating site instead of in person? I don't think so, it IS a dating site.

< Message edited by GotSteel -- 4/5/2009 7:27:15 AM >

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RE: What do you think of all the dommes seeking "g... - 4/5/2009 7:29:52 AM

YoungBlondeSlave

Posts: 953
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quote:

ORIGINAL: kttqnp

LadyLupine, I'm new here, but yes, I do realize they all want Pamela Anderson in leather, fulfilling their little do-me checklists!

i hate myself for actually knowing this but if that's what they want they can rent that movie she was in back in the 90s: Barb Wire. Where i think Pamela Anderson actually is *in* leather.

They can all jerk off to and get their jollies from that. It's cheaper than porn or a hooker.

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RE: What do you think of all the dommes seeking "g... - 4/5/2009 7:31:06 AM

RedMagic1

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quote:

ORIGINAL: GotSteel
it IS a dating site.

Actually, no, it's not. Some people use it for dating. Not everyone does. For example, sometimes I use CM to date, and other times I use it to hang out with people I know, or would like to get to know better.

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