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RE: Is the Female Domination Lifestyle a Failure? - 8/17/2009 9:16:00 PM   
littlesarbonn


Posts: 1710
Joined: 12/3/2005
From: Stockton, California
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

Quick, littlesarbonn!  Look over there!!!!!!

/steals littlesarbonn's microwave dinner/ 



I just don't get a break....


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(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 81
RE: Is the Female Domination Lifestyle a Failure? - 8/17/2009 9:20:45 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		I won't break ya, but I might want to bend ya a little.  

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to littlesarbonn)
Profile   Post #: 82
RE: Is the Female Domination Lifestyle a Failure? - 8/17/2009 9:22:16 PM   
littlesarbonn


Posts: 1710
Joined: 12/3/2005
From: Stockton, California
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

I won't break ya, but I might want to bend ya a little.  


You're just saying that to be nice....


_____________________________

<---- FYI, this picture looks JUST like me


http://www.littlesarbonn.com/Stickman/Stickman.htm
The Adventures of Stickman and the Unemployed Lego Spaceman

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 83
RE: Is the Female Domination Lifestyle a Failure? - 8/17/2009 9:22:46 PM   
Andalusite


Posts: 2492
Joined: 1/25/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: slavekal
I have seen so many so-called submissive men who are just looking for occasional free sessions.  You either gotta give up some cash, or you gotta be willing to give up some manual labor, or some kind of service.  If you just want an hour of play time when the mood strikes you, you have to hire a pro.

Back when I did play casually, I didn't expect services, and would have been very offended by an offer of cash. I did get to know them on a friendly basis outside of the dungeon first. I mostly played with couples and switches, but also played with a couple of male submissives and male dominants. That was only for a couple of months at two different points though, when I was fairly recently out of a relationship and wanted a time out before getting back into dating. Once I started dating again, I only wanted to play with guys who were potential boyfriends. I know a few other women here who also play casually, at least some of the time/with some people, without expecting payment or services.

(in reply to slavekal)
Profile   Post #: 84
RE: Is the Female Domination Lifestyle a Failure? - 8/17/2009 9:23:27 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		These rumors that you hear about Me being nice can not be proven.

Big, bad sadist....... remember?


_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to littlesarbonn)
Profile   Post #: 85
RE: Is the Female Domination Lifestyle a Failure? - 8/18/2009 1:18:32 AM   
sirsholly


Posts: 42360
Joined: 9/7/2007
From: Quietville
Status: offline 		the op has yet to return. I fear we have pissed him off

< Message edited by sirsholly -- 8/18/2009 1:21:25 AM >

_____________________________

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Profile   Post #: 86
RE: Is the Female Domination Lifestyle a Failure? - 8/18/2009 5:20:33 AM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sirsholly

the op has yet to return. I fear we have pissed him off


Which makes me wonder what he had hoped for in posting initially.  Probably validation.  That or a phone number to the local International House of (Unpaid) Dominas.


_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to sirsholly)
Profile   Post #: 87
RE: Is the Female Domination Lifestyle a Failure? - 8/18/2009 5:54:54 AM   
LATEXBABY64


Posts: 2107
Joined: 4/8/2004
Status: offline 		I have nor will i ever pay for a domme there are tons and mean tons of great dommes out there who are looking for a submissive
just got to stay way from those that want a tribute or payment Pro dommes have their place to for those that do not want a relationship are looking to get their quick drive by kink on ok there ya go but if you want a relationship look else where they are out there just be a little picky

(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 88
RE: Is the Female Domination Lifestyle a Failure? - 8/18/2009 6:09:31 AM   
lilboycaught


Posts: 65
Joined: 5/3/2005
Status: offline 		I didn't think the post would get this many responses and I'm sorry if I upset so many people.  zincpuppy had the most accurate analysis of my OP.  I wasn't asking if female domination was a failure as a concept (it's clearly a fantastic success in my mind) but rather is it a failure as a sociological phenomenon.  In the late '90s, it had seemed like femdom was going to be the next "gay."  My disappointment was that it never attained that goal, and frankly I blame it on the money thing.

I am not trying to be flame bait here.  I wanted to have a friendly discussion among like-minded people here. It was basically just trying to ask, "hey, all of you femdom folks, male and female, where are we?  Where do we go from here?"

That's all.  But people either didn't read the OP or read it with a bias because of the title.

So we didn't have that discussion.

I'd still like to.

(in reply to LaTigresse)
Profile   Post #: 89
RE: Is the Female Domination Lifestyle a Failure? - 8/18/2009 6:19:05 AM   
GreedyTop


Posts: 52100
Joined: 5/2/2007
From: Savannah, GA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

These rumors that you hear about Me being nice can not be proven.

Big, bad sadist....... remember?



fluffy

*ducks and runs*


_____________________________

polysnortatious
Supreme Goddess of Snark
CHARTER MEMBER: Lance's Fag Hags!
Waiting for my madman in a Blue Box.

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 90
RE: Is the Female Domination Lifestyle a Failure? - 8/18/2009 6:22:19 AM   
DarkSteven


Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline 		OP, you have my respect for sticking around.

I don't exactly understand your concept of femdom being the next "gay".  Are you saying that you had expected lots of media exposure for it?  If do, why would you care that it doesn't get media play?

Do you get some kind of personal benefit if femdom becomes considered more mainstream?


_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to lilboycaught)
Profile   Post #: 91
RE: Is the Female Domination Lifestyle a Failure? - 8/18/2009 6:27:48 AM   
Arillis


Posts: 75
Joined: 10/28/2008
Status: offline 		Your question received responses consistent with and predicated upon prompting and promoting hostility toward anyone voicing diverse opinion. Sarcasm was attempted but failed miserable even though cloaked in the shroud of gang like mentalities..

(in reply to lilboycaught)
Profile   Post #: 92
RE: Is the Female Domination Lifestyle a Failure? - 8/18/2009 6:32:58 AM   
lilboycaught


Posts: 65
Joined: 5/3/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

OP, you have my respect for sticking around.

I don't exactly understand your concept of femdom being the next "gay".  Are you saying that you had expected lots of media exposure for it?  If do, why would you care that it doesn't get media play?

Do you get some kind of personal benefit if femdom becomes considered more mainstream?



Kind of.  It depends on what you mean by "media exposure," but yes, that was the direction I wanted it to take.  Femdom in the news, femdom in movies, nearly everyone has a "femdom friend."  And nobody feels weird about it.  Society just accepting that "a lot of people are just wired that way."  And it's no big deal.  Nobody disrespects you because of it.

I think this would obviously benefit both dominant females and submissive females.  We're not freaks.  We are perfectly normal people.  We're just not perceived that way.

(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 93
RE: Is the Female Domination Lifestyle a Failure? - 8/18/2009 6:34:06 AM   
lilboycaught


Posts: 65
Joined: 5/3/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Arillis

Your question received responses consistent with and predicated upon prompting and promoting hostility toward anyone voicing diverse opinion. Sarcasm was attempted but failed miserable even though cloaked in the shroud of gang like mentalities..


Exactly.  I won't say another word.

(in reply to Arillis)
Profile   Post #: 94
RE: Is the Female Domination Lifestyle a Failure? - 8/18/2009 6:52:16 AM   
RedMagic1


Posts: 6470
Joined: 5/10/2007
Status: offline 		There is wide acceptance of the notion of a sexystrong woman.  Think Lara Croft.

There is, however, not much societal acceptance of a submissive man.  Being an occasional bedroom bottom, in order to nail Lara Croft -- that's ok.  Being the "s" in D/s, not so much.

Also, there is a tremendous change in poll results when hetero men are asked "What do you look for in a partner?"  Younger men put the ability for women to make money at very high priority.  Men over 40 tend not to mention this at all.  Women of all ages do include this, as you might expect.


_____________________________

Not with envy, not with a twisted heart, shall you feel superior, or go about boasting. Rather in goodness by action make true your song and your word. Thus you shall be highly regarded, and able to live in peace with all others.
- 15th century Aztec

(in reply to lilboycaught)
Profile   Post #: 95
RE: Is the Female Domination Lifestyle a Failure? - 8/18/2009 7:21:20 AM   
lilboycaught


Posts: 65
Joined: 5/3/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: RedMagic1

There is wide acceptance of the notion of a sexystrong woman.  Think Lara Croft.

There is, however, not much societal acceptance of a submissive man.  Being an occasional bedroom bottom, in order to nail Lara Croft -- that's ok.  Being the "s" in D/s, not so much.

Also, there is a tremendous change in poll results when hetero men are asked "What do you look for in a partner?"  Younger men put the ability for women to make money at very high priority.  Men over 40 tend not to mention this at all.  Women of all ages do include this, as you might expect.



Yes, you really kind of hit at the heart of the matter there.  Women don't have any problem saying they're dominant.  At least not any more.  It's cool for a woman to be a "dominant" and has been for probably 20 years (there was a time when it would have been considered "un-ladylike").  On the other hand, to be a "submissive" male -- people still seem to kind of associate that with weakness.  And they do this in spite of the fact the contemporary societal belief is that "submissive men are usually very powerful people in society."  They would say those very words, yet still believe that a male being submissive to a female is weird, and probably a weakling

That's one of the things femdom needs to get past, and the OP was exactly about these kind of issues.

Thank god this discussion is finally turning half way intelligent.  Yesterday it was idiotic, with all kinds of people reading the title of the post while seemingly never reading the post itself.

(in reply to RedMagic1)
Profile   Post #: 96
RE: Is the Female Domination Lifestyle a Failure? - 8/18/2009 7:27:44 AM   
slavekal


Posts: 1486
Joined: 7/20/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Andalusite

quote:

ORIGINAL: slavekal
I have seen so many so-called submissive men who are just looking for occasional free sessions.  You either gotta give up some cash, or you gotta be willing to give up some manual labor, or some kind of service.  If you just want an hour of play time when the mood strikes you, you have to hire a pro.

Back when I did play casually, I didn't expect services, and would have been very offended by an offer of cash. I did get to know them on a friendly basis outside of the dungeon first. I mostly played with couples and switches, but also played with a couple of male submissives and male dominants. That was only for a couple of months at two different points though, when I was fairly recently out of a relationship and wanted a time out before getting back into dating. Once I started dating again, I only wanted to play with guys who were potential boyfriends. I know a few other women here who also play casually, at least some of the time/with some people, without expecting payment or services.


You are probably unique.  Most women are not looking for this guy and that guy to drop in whenever they feel like it for a free session.  I have found that many lifestyle dommes are looking to be served, not just to play.  At parties and such, they might just want to play, but on a day to day, they have expectations of their subs.


_____________________________

"The Courage to Submit: the submissive male's guide to finding a dominant woman"
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(in reply to Andalusite)
Profile   Post #: 97
RE: Is the Female Domination Lifestyle a Failure? - 8/18/2009 7:27:52 AM   
sirsholly


Posts: 42360
Joined: 9/7/2007
From: Quietville
Status: offline
quote:

Thank god this discussion is finally turning half way intelligent. Yesterday it was idiotic, with all kinds of people reading the title of the post while seemingly never reading the post itself.
yesterday you were whining...today you are sounding halfway intelligent. 

_____________________________

PICKED UPON
TECHNO-DOLT
MEMBER OF THE SUBBIE MAFIA
GRACEFULLY CHALLENGED :::::splat:::::
BOOT WHORE
VAA/S FAN

GIVES GOOD HEART (Lushy)

CREATOR OF MAYHEM (practice)


(in reply to lilboycaught)
Profile   Post #: 98
RE: Is the Female Domination Lifestyle a Failure? - 8/18/2009 7:35:12 AM   
CreativeDominant


Posts: 11032
Joined: 3/11/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

These rumors that you hear about Me being nice can not be proven.

Big, bad sadist....... remember?

~chokes...coughs...~

(in reply to LadyPact)
Profile   Post #: 99
RE: Is the Female Domination Lifestyle a Failure? - 8/18/2009 7:36:02 AM   
Michael3001


Posts: 17
Joined: 4/27/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

OP, you have my respect for sticking around.

I don't exactly understand your concept of femdom being the next "gay".  Are you saying that you had expected lots of media exposure for it?  If do, why would you care that it doesn't get media play?

Do you get some kind of personal benefit if femdom becomes considered more mainstream?



Great question DS. Yeah ill say he does. I think it's pretty clear he has an agenda to water down female power. Must be afraid of it.


(in reply to DarkSteven)
Profile   Post #: 100
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