RE: why do older dominat seek yonger subimssives/slaves?

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RE: why do older dominat seek yonger subimssives/slaves? - 12/7/2009 6:15:18 AM

PrimalConsonance

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(CNJDom here) I am reminded of a simular discussion that took place in "Moonstruck"... They chase after younger women because they are afraid of dying. Just a thought....

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RE: why do older dominat seek yonger subimssives/slaves? - 12/7/2009 10:12:42 AM

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What is older...mmm...
PErsonally I had slave girls of more then 10 year younger...and around my age (37) and some older.
Although young people have the perhaps more perfect body...I prefer the mind of the one around my age and up.
But......both ....have their positive and negative things.

Best is to have one of both ..lol

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RE: why do older dominat seek yonger subimssives/slaves? - 12/7/2009 10:38:28 AM

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i enjoyed this discussion...and think that everyone hit on good points. i'm a 27 year old sub looking for a dom, so my answer isn't from a dom view, but here is what i've noticed:

The main point seems to be the lack of ability to spot BS. i've been through some stuff, don't really consider myself "young" anymore, and have gotten pretty good at spotting it. If you call one of these folks on a line of BS, they either get VERY rude and defensive, or they simply disappear. i had one the other day tell me "let's face it, as a fat bitch you don't have many options. stop acting like you're hot." i am on the cushy side, but it's not something that bothers me. While it's harder to find a partner being a little heavier, i kind of like knowing that whomever i do find isn't going to desert me if i put on a few pounds as i age. It also weeds out some of the ones that are just looking for a quick fling.

There is less baggage, yes, and bodies are probably better, but i really believe it's mostly the BS. i've heard a lot of it, as i'm sure everyone on here has. i choose to believe that the packaging is not as important as the spirit within it, or the connection made. Maybe that's idealistic of me, but it's a pudgy girl's hope. *s*

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RE: why do older dominat seek yonger subimssives/slaves? - 12/7/2009 11:07:23 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: leone1

Im just curious what the fansination with younger subissives (18-23) that older dominats (40-100) have.

Please help me understand.

In general... the GOOD:

1. better body
2. blank canvas / less baggage / less existing commitments
3. no or fewer roots, so easier to change life/relocate
4. more open to trying new things and to training

In general... the BAD:

1. inexperienced (sexually, and in life)
2. uncertainty in the power dynamic (i.e., could just be trying something new)
3. more work to initially training
4. immaturity

In general... why younger subs/slaves SEEK an older Dominant:

1. experiece to learn from... to be guided
2. financial / emotional security and stability
3. maturity in life, love, and possessing certain skills in the power dynamic
4. often easier to submit to an older authority figure than to a peer

*Note: The above are GENERAL statements/observations... age alone does NOT a good Dominant make, as there are a BOUNTY of "older" Dominants who are clueless to the dynamic...immature twits... liars/cheats... and complete failures in their OWN lives; and as such, shouldn't be guiding, leading or training a goldfish, let alone another human being. Too many "younger" subs/slaves miss this important point... if an alleged Dominant can't manage their own life and has accomplished little while on this planet, this is NOT the person to put your trust in... that would only result in the blind leading the blind.

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RE: why do older dominat seek yonger subimssives/slaves? - 12/7/2009 11:37:46 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterSlaveLA
guiding, leading or training a goldfish

sorry....that part made me laugh! i'm now being distracted from my studying by daydreams of what it'd look like to train a goldfish.

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RE: why do older dominat seek yonger subimssives/slaves? - 12/7/2009 11:43:43 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: littlewonder

Younger ones have smoother skin, tighter, smaller bodies, firmer tits, more naive, not as much baggage, moldable, more energetic.

Well, except for the firmer tits part, we could be talking about younger men which some of us are very fond of.

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RE: why do older dominat seek yonger subimssives/slaves? - 12/7/2009 11:51:41 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: jennileigh8182

quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterSlaveLA
guiding, leading or training a goldfish

sorry....that part made me laugh! i'm now being distracted from my studying by daydreams of what it'd look like to train a goldfish.

Biggest challenge is preventing the collar from slipping off.

*Note: Staples don't work... Result: Fishy gets flushed!

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RE: why do older dominat seek yonger subimssives/slaves? - 12/7/2009 12:43:41 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven
About anything. Take a forty year old woman. She will likely have encountered the guy who says he's not married when he is, the guy who refuses to commit, the guy who chooses video games over a relationship, the guy who has substance issues... and her attitude is "I've been down that road and am not going there again."

Been there and met all of those...you're dead on. After those kinds of guys the BS detector starts going off even when you get close to someone like that in the grocery store.

quote:

A younger woman may not be able to spot them the first time

.

This is very true found one of them in my living room saturday morning on a 10 degree snow day with almost no clothes on. Am I wrong thinking self value means you wear clothes and not napkins out in the snow and men that just got shagged should at least offer a coat or warm the car when driving napkin girl home??

To all of those that smacked me around a few weeks back, THANK YOU!! I live with mr bag. yes that's the famous douche bag himself.

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RE: why do older dominat seek yonger subimssives/slaves? - 12/7/2009 12:49:27 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

quote:

ORIGINAL: leone1

Line of bullshit like what? May I ask.

About anything. Take a forty year old woman. She will likely have encountered the guy who says he's not married when he is, the guy who refuses to commit, the guy who chooses video games over a relationship, the guy who has substance issues... and her attitude is "I've been down that road and am not going there again."

A younger woman may not be able to spot them the first time.

i think i must be gifted....i'm on the accelerated track!

i've been with the married guy that said he was divorced
i've been with the guy that wouldn't commit
i'm divorcing a BONUS guy - chose video games over relationship and over his child AND had a substance abuse issue!

And i'm only 27...

(in reply to DarkSteven)

RE: why do older dominat seek yonger subimssives/slaves? - 12/7/2009 12:57:57 PM

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There are some advantages to growing up fast, and "baptism by fire" The tools you acquire can be very useful, i have found.

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(in reply to jennileigh8182)

RE: why do older dominat seek yonger subimssives/slaves? - 12/7/2009 2:22:27 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: leone1

Im just curious what the fansination with younger subissives (18-23) that older dominat (40-100) have.
Please help me understand.

As an older dominant, I have no particular interest in in someone who is younger than my own daughter

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RE: why do older dominat seek yonger subimssives/slaves? - 12/7/2009 2:27:08 PM

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like omg i totally no wat u meen!! doms think im like hella hawt an they wanna fuk me, but it's like they can't actually conceive of me as a person with valid thoughts and ideas of my own. They're surprised that as a 20 year old, I can spell and type, I have my own opinions, I have a good idea of what I like and what I'm looking for, and I can *gasp* possibly even have a real grown-up conversation!
If this is really that surprising and unusual, I fear for the future...because I'll be stuck with all these immature inexperienced younguns until they figure their shit out.

Personally, I prefer older partners because I relate to them better and I feel more comfortable allowing a level of vulnerability into the relationship. There is usually a significant correlation between age, life experience, and maturity. More experience usually translates as stability. They have had more time to decide how they feel about social issues and usually there's a valid reasoning behind each stance, rather than just blindly supporting their parents' ideologies or siding with the majority opinion. If you fuck up, ideally you learn from it and move on. Younger people just haven't had the necessary experiences to form yet, they're still developing - so some inconsistency should be expected. Yes, younger women are easier to take advantage of, and I can see the allure in having access to someone still so malleable. That said, I don't see any kinky glory in babysitting a brat who doesn't know what she's into and is likely to lose interest in the lifestyle.

From a sexual perspective, there are attractive people in my age range, but I am more attracted to older men. No, it's not a daddy complex - I don't get off on the age difference. Again, there is a strong correlation between age and experience, and men 30-40 are more likely to know what to do in the sack than the post-pubescent boys my age. They also tend to know what they like, and actually seem more willing to experiment. I guess once you can say "penis" without giggling, you figure out what to DO with it. On the other hand, I am more attracted to females around my age, and I can understand wanting a casual fling - but because there is no significant age difference, I've never gotten any disparaging remarks for dating/sleeping with a hot tight 19 year old chick

and I don't see how a true D/s relationship can be casual.
Be warned - these females are crazy. Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned, but hell hath no imagination like a vengeful teenager.

I know how incredibly hypocritical this is, but I can't stand most people my age. Let the pervy lecherous Doms have them - if they have low enough standards to be pleased with some pretty vapid teenager they can't have a conversation with, they deserve what they get - and maybe some of the silly little girls I've encountered will learn something.

Of course, there are no prerequisites to be a dumbass - there are idiots in every demographic. There are also no age restrictions on intelligence - I'm sure there are plenty of people 18-23 who defy the stereotype. I just haven't had the dubious pleasure of meeting them.

< Message edited by switch2please -- 12/7/2009 2:29:28 PM >

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RE: why do older dominat seek yonger subimssives/slaves? - 12/7/2009 2:29:47 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Acer49

As an older dominant, I have no particular interest in in someone who is younger than my own daughter

Its nice to hear a man say this. i personally couldn't be with someone younger than my kids either.

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Romans 10:13,For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.
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RE: why do older dominat seek yonger subimssives/slaves? - 12/7/2009 2:33:29 PM

HisSweetElysium

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quote:

ORIGINAL: switch2please

like omg i totally no wat u meen!! doms think im like hella hawt an they wanna fuk me, but it's like they can't actually conceive of me as a person with valid thoughts and ideas of my own.

LOL I think I just threw up a little in my mouth.

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RE: why do older dominat seek yonger subimssives/slaves? - 12/7/2009 2:39:20 PM

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yeah...it was hard to type...still recovering...

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RE: why do older dominat seek yonger subimssives/slaves? - 12/7/2009 2:46:13 PM

zephyroftheNorth

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterSlaveLA

quote:

ORIGINAL: jennileigh8182

quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterSlaveLA
guiding, leading or training a goldfish

sorry....that part made me laugh! i'm now being distracted from my studying by daydreams of what it'd look like to train a goldfish.

Biggest challenge is preventing the collar from slipping off.

*Note: Staples don't work... Result: Fishy gets flushed!

Then I suppose nails won't work either *quietly puts down hammer*

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RE: why do older dominat seek yonger subimssives/slaves? - 12/7/2009 2:51:57 PM

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It's not even necessarily about older doms seeking younger subs. Most subs just don't give a shit about younger doms. Some want an older dom since they'll provide for them financially, some want an older dom because they think age always equals experience, and some just prefer (much) older partners. It always gets under my skin when I see subs my age with similar interests, who end their lengthy profiles with, "oh, btw, only looking for guys 40+ lol." It's like I might as well leave the community for a decade or so then come back. Probably wasting my time until then, anyway.

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RE: why do older dominat seek yonger subimssives/slaves? - 12/7/2009 2:57:28 PM

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Age does not always equal experience, but it does seem to be the normal route.
Younger people will always be more difficult to take seriously, because we are still developing. We may both be stuck in that trap.

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RE: why do older dominat seek yonger subimssives/slaves? - 12/7/2009 3:01:23 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: SimonSekeira

It's not even necessarily about older doms seeking younger subs. Most subs just don't give a shit about younger doms. Some want an older dom since they'll provide for them financially, some want an older dom because they think age always equals experience, and some just prefer (much) older partners. It always gets under my skin when I see subs my age with similar interests, who end their lengthy profiles with, "oh, btw, only looking for guys 40+ lol." It's like I might as well leave the community for a decade or so then come back. Probably wasting my time until then, anyway.

Not me! *L* I'm 27 and looking for a dom 25-37, preferably. I just am not attracted to men outside of that age bracket, as a general rule. Plus, with a child, I want to preserve a family dynamic.

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RE: why do older dominat seek yonger subimssives/slaves? - 12/7/2009 3:06:34 PM

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Between two years younger and ten years older. You're still far off balance. I wouldn't mind fooling around with someone ten years my elder, but a relationship? Please. I know it can work as I've seen it myself, but I'd rather play roulette than gamble on those odds.

(in reply to jennileigh8182)

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