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ORIGINAL: Awareness

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ORIGINAL: MagiksSlave
I disagree, why are my hard limits any less valid than someone elses just because mine are routed in past abuse? Someone here said it and they were right, a hard limit is a hard limit period end of story.

  Look, there are multiple ways I can approach this:

A) I can point out that if you propose to be a slave, you don't have any hard limits.
B) I can refer to the fact that you're calling it a hard limit to avoid dealing with it.
C) I can simply point out that every sub makes a judgment call on any dominant she interacts with.  Dominants will do the same and those who value themselves most highly will be the most demanding.  Such men do not have any expectation that you can hide away an aspect of your sexuality and expect that to stand.

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This is part of an issue I have been working on getting over my entire adult life but sometimes you have to see that some things are too painful emotionaly to simply solve. That doesnt mean you dont continue to work on them and it also doesnt mean that even if you continue to work on them that you will succeed in fixing it all.

  I understand that.  You're not the first woman I've encountered who's dealt with such things.  I'm not saying that a Dominant who interacts with you can't approach the subject with respect for what you've endured and an understanding of your emotions around the issue.  What I'm saying is that I wouldn't accept an unwillingness to work on it.  You responded by saying you want to be valued for who you are and I'm pointing out that everything factors into that valuation, including your willingness to deal with such issues.  A sub who demonstrates a willingness to do so will be more highly valued than one who doesn't.

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I'm not saying that a Dominant who interacts with you can't approach the subject with respect for what you've endured and an understanding of your emotions around the issue. What I'm saying is that I wouldn't accept an unwillingness to work on it.

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A sub who demonstrates a willingness to do so will be more highly valued than one who doesn't.

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ORIGINAL: MagiksSlave
First off, I am not a slave, I know the name says otherwise and I am sorry for the confusion (I was at one point a slave to one man and only one man. I am no longer a slave and if you had bothered to read my profile at all you would have known that.) Even if I was a slave I would still be entitled to hard limits, being a slave doesn't mean you have none or aren't entitled to any.

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Second, I am dealing with it as I have said several times but while I am dealing with it and not OVER it, it remains a hard limit, end of story.

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ORIGINAL: Awareness

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ORIGINAL: MagiksSlave
First off, I am not a slave, I know the name says otherwise and I am sorry for the confusion (I was at one point a slave to one man and only one man. I am no longer a slave and if you had bothered to read my profile at all you would have known that.) Even if I was a slave I would still be entitled to hard limits, being a slave doesn't mean you have none or aren't entitled to any.

I disagree. Attitudes such as this derive from people who are playing at slavery, not serious individuals contemplating a TPE arrangement.

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Second, I am dealing with it as I have said several times but while I am dealing with it and not OVER it, it remains a hard limit, end of story.

Let me get this straight. You asked a question; I answered; you disagreed; I clarified. And you're still bitching about the answer you got.

Next time, try Ask A Mistress. They'll give you all the cheerleading ' you go girl ' posts you seem to want. Don't ask a Dom a fucking question and then complain because the answer isn't pleasing to you.

I note the usual idiots are missing the point. Issues writ large.

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ORIGINAL: ChatteParfaitt

First off, I wanted to commend you for making this thread and for having the guts to stick with it, despite some of the unaware posts that have been made. That took an incredible amount of courage, personal fortitude, and self knowledge.

In my mind, anyone who doesn't want you b/c of this particular limit, could never, ever deserve you.

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ORIGINAL: Buzzzz

Sweetie, I am not changing a thing , everything is very well, with me.

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ORIGINAL: Awareness

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ORIGINAL: MagiksSlave
First off, I am not a slave, I know the name says otherwise and I am sorry for the confusion (I was at one point a slave to one man and only one man. I am no longer a slave and if you had bothered to read my profile at all you would have known that.) Even if I was a slave I would still be entitled to hard limits, being a slave doesn't mean you have none or aren't entitled to any.

I disagree. Attitudes such as this derive from people who are playing at slavery, not serious individuals contemplating a TPE arrangement.

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Second, I am dealing with it as I have said several times but while I am dealing with it and not OVER it, it remains a hard limit, end of story.

Let me get this straight. You asked a question; I answered; you disagreed; I clarified. And you're still bitching about the answer you got.

Next time, try Ask A Mistress. They'll give you all the cheerleading ' you go girl ' posts you seem to want. Don't ask a Dom a fucking question and then complain because the answer isn't pleasing to you.

I note the usual idiots are missing the point. Issues writ large.

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ORIGINAL: MagiksSlave
No my problem come in with the fact that your OPINION is that your OPNINION is that of the entire Dom community and there for a fact and not an OPINION. I would take no issue if you answered for yourself and only yourself and werent trying to make me feel like less of a person for this.

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ORIGINAL: Kalista07

It amazes me that so many people are up in arms about magikslave's inability to give a blow job... I wonder if these same *people* would be as adamant about men who refuse to perform oral an a woman.

Kali

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ORIGINAL: ChatteParfaitt

Please do not misunderstand me, Hilly. Everyone wants what they want. I want what I want, and that's a priority for me.

So I get what you are saying, of course. A person who looks at the whole individual can make some decisions.

For me personally, individual sex acts are not among what I need to live, however, relationships with strong, courageous, up front individuals willing to own up to their shit and obviously working on it? Yeah, I need that.

It's rare, but I need it none the less.