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Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd been raped?


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Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd bee... - 9/16/2011 12:40:28 AM   
NiceGuyNihilist


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The question in the thread title has been kicking around in my head for a while now, ever since I happened upon a vomit-provoking and highly illuminating prison rape documentary on YouTube. I forced myself to watch the whole thing out of a sense of pity for the victims--or perhaps the worst part of me forbade me to turn away from such exquisite sickness. In any event, I watched it.

I found myself wondering how women--submissive women in particular--perceive men who are turned out in prison. Maybe there can be no definitive answer to this question, but I suspect it's at least safe to say that virtually no woman would ever be more attracted to a man for learning that he was, or had once been, another man's bitch. And it seems reasonable to assume that a woman who actively craves dominance in a man would, if anything, be more inclined than women in general to feel an instinctive revulsion for a man who had been forced into submission himself--and not just submission, but submission of the most degrading kind.

Is my intuition right? When the men who've been the victim of this atrocity conceal their shame from you, are they right to do so? Would any part of you think less of them if you knew? I do care what your rational, reasonable, moral mind has to say, but I'm more interested in the reptile beneath.

And with that, I'm gone for the night. The bees are stinging my eyes already.

< Message edited by NiceGuyNihilist -- 9/16/2011 12:41:35 AM >


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RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/16/2011 12:54:12 AM   
Epytropos


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Long ago I read a blog ost by a sub who said that she "long[ed] to find the lowliest dom, downtrodden and picked on, and raise him as unto a God with [her] submission." It was a very purple phrase, and I feel a little bad even repeating it, but I think it expresses a desire I've seen a few times in my life. There seem to be subs who like to find doms who would not be considered traditionally successful with their peers and serve them. I think perhaps it comes from a combination of (1) the person not necessarily being able to 'force' them to submit, thereby creating a more internal, self-inflicted sort of slavery and (2) the whole romanticized 'caring for the wounded underdog' thing you see so often in fiction.

So, that sort might actually find the prison bitch dom to be especially desirable. I'm not going to speak for the sub community as a whole, but it bore mention since I haven't seen any of those sorts of subs frequent this place (that I've noticed, anyway).


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RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/16/2011 12:55:04 AM   
littlewonder


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it wouldn't bother me in the least as long as he was working on his issues and it didn't become an overbearing problem in our relationship.

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RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/16/2011 1:31:58 AM   
Carouselambra


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Shit happens. I was in prison for eight months and it's not THAT BAD. The most freedom I've ever experience, IMO.Free food, free shelter, free showers, free crime school. everyone is in survival mode and it's great.


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RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/16/2011 3:17:09 AM   
zephyroftheNorth


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Why would anyone think someone who had been raped would be less anything? You seem to associate a man being raped as someone who would be less dominant, less of a man. Why? It wouldn't make any difference to me at all as long as he was working on the issues being raped created.

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RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/16/2011 3:21:43 AM   
myotherself


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quote:

ORIGINAL: zephyroftheNorth

Why would anyone think someone who had been raped would be less anything? You seem to associate a man being raped as someone who would be less dominant, less of a man. Why? It wouldn't make any difference to me at all as long as he was working on the issues being raped created.


What Zephy said

I would be more concerned as to the reasons he was in prison, and whether he was a good or safe person to be around....

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RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/16/2011 4:01:31 AM   
mons


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I will up front on this one!  Anyone whom is raped be it a man or woman, It is a frightening thing to happen
as for him being a catch as a submissive is a crazy thought!!!!!!!!   This human is raped then for someone to use this
as a jumping board to see if he will be a good submissive, is this what you trying to say?  I do not want to be wrong
but I knew someone very close to me but a man and a woman whom were beating and this was not in prison, it was at a river and older guys raped and did things that changed their lives forever!  If this were a woman whom had been raped, would '
you question if she is still good enough to have as a submissive!  If I am wrong on this one, but I think you may be thnking that because he was raped by men it would somehow make him a better submissive?  Rape is Rape a crime of hate and control and you mention "that he was another man's bitch"  You have it so wrong I do not understand you pleasure in watching this and it was" exquiste "  I do not think you have ever meant a person (man or woman) whom has been raped! if you did you would know the horror and the years of nightmares and family pain and sorrow!  After the person is raped they still are a person and no they do not want to be with a dominant person, that I have ever heard about!  I know a man who was a submissive he was raped on his first meeting with a domme!  He never went out again!  So what is your question I am blinded by the word "rape" I may have read everything wrong so please explain again ! 

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RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/16/2011 4:08:29 AM   
LadyPact


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Are you f*cking serious? 

So, if I go out tomorrow and happen to be a victim if a violent attack, I am less of a Dominant to you?  What the f*ck is wrong with you?

Take your supposed revulsion for the victim of violence and shove it up your sanctimonious ass.


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RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/16/2011 4:09:31 AM   
myotherself


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In a nutshell:

NGN watched a documentary wherein men in prison were raped and forced to be the 'bitch' for a man or group of men in prison. The important word here is 'forced'.

His question is "if you found out that the man you call your Dominant was to tell you he'd been through this, would that make you think him less dominant in any way?"



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RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/16/2011 4:12:59 AM   
crazyml


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Indeed. And the cashews are fargelling the hippopotami on Wednesday.

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RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/16/2011 4:14:59 AM   
crazyml


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I'm sensing this was a response to the op, rather than myotherself, right?
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

Are you f*cking serious? 

So, if I go out tomorrow and happen to be a victim if a violent attack, I am less of a Dominant to you?  What the f*ck is wrong with you?

Take your supposed revulsion for the victim of violence and shove it up your sanctimonious ass.




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RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/16/2011 4:16:14 AM   
myotherself


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quote:

ORIGINAL: crazyml

I'm sensing this was a response to the op, rather than myotherself, right?



That's the way I took it


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RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/16/2011 4:17:03 AM   
LadyPact


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In My disgust, I neglected to specify My response to being a fast reply to the OP.  Please excuse any confusion that I have caused.

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Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

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RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/16/2011 4:17:28 AM   
crazyml


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This...
quote:

ORIGINAL: myotherself


quote:

ORIGINAL: zephyroftheNorth

Why would anyone think someone who had been raped would be less anything? You seem to associate a man being raped as someone who would be less dominant, less of a man. Why? It wouldn't make any difference to me at all as long as he was working on the issues being raped created.


What Zephy said

I would be more concerned as to the reasons he was in prison, and whether he was a good or safe person to be around....



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RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/16/2011 4:19:22 AM   
crazyml


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Grin, I thought as much.

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RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/16/2011 4:21:23 AM   
GreedyTop


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quote:

ORIGINAL: crazyml

Indeed. And the cashews are fargelling the hippopotami on Wednesday.



Hey!!! Cashew would do no such thing!!






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RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/16/2011 4:22:44 AM   
crazyml


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Oh yeah? And you watch that innocent looking Kitteh 24/7 right?

That feline has "hippopotamus fargeler" written all over her enigmatic face.


Just sayin.

[Ed to correct the kind of typo that makes me think "fucking moron"]
[Then to make another correction. Fuck.]

< Message edited by crazyml -- 9/16/2011 4:24:37 AM >


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RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/16/2011 4:25:40 AM   
zephyroftheNorth


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quote:

Take your supposed revulsion for the victim of violence and shove it up your sanctimonious ass.


Ummmm LadyP his revulsion was for the rape not the victims of the rape...he pitied them.

I forced myself to watch the whole thing out of a sense of pity for the victims--or perhaps the worst part of me forbade me to turn away from such exquisite sickness. In any event, I watched it.

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RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/16/2011 4:32:48 AM   
LadyPact


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And it seems reasonable to assume that a woman who actively craves dominance in a man would, if anything, be more inclined than women in general to feel an instinctive revulsion for a man who had been forced into submission himself--and not just submission, but submission of the most degrading kind

Are we really sure that I'm the one who is confused here?


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The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

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RE: Would you be less inclined to submit to a man who'd... - 9/16/2011 4:36:30 AM   
ProlificNeeds


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While I understand the purpose of the question, I don't think the question is phrased properly, or, it's asked in a context that assumes we weak little s-types need to see our D types as something stronger or more powerful than us who are 'protectors'? Which is never the case for me, so the question seems nonsensical.

Would you think a person, is a lesser person, holds less worth to society or as a friend, or even as a relationship partner because they were mugged?

When someone inflicts a violent crime against another person it doesn't make them less anything, if anything it makes them more experienced in the long run with dealing with the ugly side of life. Being a victim doesn't make you weak, or unintelligent, that is the mind frame of abused partners who think their S.O. beat them because of some fault of their own.

If you encounter a lot of revulsion to your question, this is why, it's based on an assumed line of reasoning that has nothing to do with reality or common sense, only shallow people would find fault with someone for being a victim... and I would certainly hope no one is ever caught in a relationship with someone who devalues you in such a manner.

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