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RE: being married... - 1/26/2007 1:32:34 PM   
skysub


Posts: 4
Joined: 9/2/2004
Status: offline
Some some food for thought, but if we were able to prohibit all married persons from seeking BDSM outside their marriages, wouldn't a lot of professional Dommes need a new source of income?

(in reply to MsOpal)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: being married... - 1/26/2007 1:40:30 PM   
krista


Posts: 109
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
Greetings domiguy

quote:

Krista covers LA's face with her enormous jugs


Large women tend to have large breasts...i do not use them for nefarious purposes ...

a peaceful
krista
joy through service

(in reply to krista)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: being married... - 1/26/2007 1:42:41 PM   
Domdecisive


Posts: 1
Joined: 11/14/2005
Status: offline
Amazing to me how people who are supposedly so liberal, sensitive, and supportive of homosexuality, bisexuality, peeing on another, bondage and play rape, anal sex, and dozens of other things that most vanilla types would find abhorrent, can be so judgemental about extra-marital bdsm activity.   This notion of cultural diversity and welcoming alternate lifestyles seems to only be ok when it's about your own kink, but not when it's someone else's choice of lifestyle.  

(in reply to MsOpal)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: being married... - 1/26/2007 1:48:15 PM   
BlindDescent


Posts: 113
Joined: 9/26/2006
Status: offline
Primates are not and have never been mate for lifers; that's why they call it monkeying around isn't it?. WE are still primates...we just wear costumes and have a knowledge of death.
Honesty is one way to show by example how you invest your karma. Serial cheating is the portfolio of poor investment practices...unless you have a really good excuse or swiss cheese ethics.

(in reply to skysub)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: being married... - 1/26/2007 1:51:04 PM   
mnottertail


Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline
Where the fuck do you guys keep coming up with this tolerance and openness shit?

Where is that implied---- we got some stiff rules about right and wrong in the main to keep our physical and mental beings alive---

We don't hurt or substantially risk hurting physically or mentally anyone who doesn't beg for the shit.

End of joke.....Real kinksters are pretty fucking intolerant of anything goes to get your cock sucked or pussy stuffed kinda shit.

Ron

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30


(in reply to Domdecisive)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: being married... - 1/26/2007 1:55:39 PM   
mstrjx


Posts: 2045
Joined: 11/27/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Domdecisive

Amazing to me how people who are supposedly so liberal, sensitive, and supportive of homosexuality, bisexuality, peeing on another, bondage and play rape, anal sex, and dozens of other things that most vanilla types would find abhorrent, can be so judgemental about extra-marital bdsm activity.   This notion of cultural diversity and welcoming alternate lifestyles seems to only be ok when it's about your own kink, but not when it's someone else's choice of lifestyle.  


Pardon me for not reading the entirety of what you wrote.  I realize in advance this is going to sound mean but all I got out of it was .....

Blah blah blah you're talking about something I do in a bad way blah blah blah.

Here's where it becomes a problem.  What two people do is fine by me.  It's fine by any of us.  But if you believe in SSC, you're ignoring the fact that there is one or more parties that are NOT consenting to the activities that the two people are doing.

Yes, I know that is the person who isn't finding out about these activities.

You go on believing that.

Jeff

_____________________________

Know thyself. It's the best gift you can ever give yourself.

(in reply to Domdecisive)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: being married... - 1/26/2007 2:01:17 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Domdecisive
Amazing to me how people who are supposedly so liberal, sensitive, and supportive of homosexuality, bisexuality, peeing on another, bondage and play rape, anal sex, and dozens of other things that most vanilla types would find abhorrent, can be so judgemental about extra-marital bdsm activity.   This notion of cultural diversity and welcoming alternate lifestyles seems to only be ok when it's about your own kink, but not when it's someone else's choice of lifestyle.  

We are supportive of those things only if with people who freely consent.

If you are cheating, then someone didn't consent.

Oh, and just because we're alternative doesn't mean we're any more or less open minded than anyone else.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to Domdecisive)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: being married... - 1/26/2007 2:03:45 PM   
LadyOunce


Posts: 126
Joined: 10/18/2006
Status: offline
Cheating disvalues trust and both marriage and Ds must have trust to make it. I think cheating is one of the  lowest of the low as it destroys so much in another person including their physical and mental well being. Any self respecting sub wouldn't accept a dominant that would do that to another.

_____________________________

Above all, be true to yourself, and if you cannot put your heart in it, take yourself out of it. -Jackson

Few are those who see with their own eyes and feel with their own hearts. -Einstein

Do not consider painful what is good for you. -Medea

(in reply to rubyleu)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: being married... - 1/26/2007 2:04:42 PM   
Rayne58


Posts: 746
Joined: 2/22/2005
From: Sydney Australia
Status: offline
*Fast reply*

When Master was single He had several married subs who came to visit Him for play sessions. Some of them said it enabled them to stay in their marriages. There were no "relationships" with them, it was purely for playtime.

I myself (when I was single) have been with 2 married men (both vanilla). I wouldn't do it again though....too much potential for hurt on all sides. However I can understand those who aren't getting their needs met at home, going out and finding it outside their marriage. I was in a 23 year marriage to a man who did not treat me well emotionally.....if there had been the opportunity I would have gone outside my marriage to try to find love and companionship. Please do not be so quick to throw stones at those who for various reasons go searching for what is missing in their lives




(in reply to BlindDescent)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: being married... - 1/26/2007 2:07:33 PM   
sweetbear61


Posts: 33
Joined: 9/12/2005
Status: offline
Cheating is Cheating in any form!  as submissive as i am , i would leave my Master without a thought if i was to catch Him cheating.. and would expect the same from Master !!  cheating hurts the Heart & Soul of O/one !!

sweet

(in reply to krista)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: being married... - 1/26/2007 2:14:06 PM   
proudsub


Posts: 6142
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Washington
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: rubyleu

Just curious to know how others feel about Dominants, and submissives that are married, yet have a discreet bdsm relationship with another, withouth their spouse being aware of it.


Hi rubyleu,
When i was first experimenting with bdsm i had a discreet extra-marital affair.  This was after 34 years of loyalty. Hubby found out, they usually do, but i was one of the lucky ones and He forgave me and wanted to learn to be my Dom. My only regret is that i didn't go to Him first with my desires. I was afraid He wouldn't understand. Things are going very well now, we've been married 38 years.

If you click "search" at the top and put in "married" or "vanilla partner" you will get a lot of threads on this topic.

I'm not sure why you posted this question, but if you are in a situation where you are considering an extra-marital bdsm affair, i highly recommend you discuss your desires with your partner first.

_____________________________

proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

"You are entitled to your own opinions but not your own facts"--Alan Greenspan


(in reply to rubyleu)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: being married... - 1/26/2007 2:14:10 PM   
mymasterssub69


Posts: 566
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline
to no one in particular

and i would like to add, i wouldn't consider what i did as cheating on my ex because technically i wasn't married to him. i was the "common law" wife in this bigamist marriage while he kept the 1st one tucked away in another country (which in this state is still legally recognized and binding).  so in your "i'm holier than you" attitude, cheating is cheating - certainly not in my case. though i had a valid marriage license, it was null and void since i'm not the legal wife. 

_____________________________

there is something infinitely magical
about a Daddy Dom
...something only a little girl
can understand.


collared on 16th Jan 2007 by bigsambaman, my Daddy

(in reply to sweetbear61)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: being married... - 1/26/2007 2:16:54 PM   
Sanity


Posts: 22039
Joined: 6/14/2006
From: Nampa, Idaho USA
Status: offline
It's lying, and it's dishonest, and it can spread deadly diseases and destroy lives and relationships forever. Other than that, there's very little wrong with it.

quote:

ORIGINAL: rubyleu

Just curious to know how others feel about Dominants, and submissives that are married, yet have a discreet bdsm relationship with another, withouth their spouse being aware of it. As for the Dominants who are married, do you feel this is an "undomly" quality?

(in reply to rubyleu)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: being married... - 1/26/2007 2:17:33 PM   
FelinePersuasion


Posts: 4792
Joined: 11/20/2004
Status: offline
I feel that they are dishonest, lying cheating cheaters who do not deserve the trust of t heir significant other when they willfully do things that are not trustworthy
quote:

ORIGINAL: rubyleu

Just curious to know how others feel about Dominants, and submissives that are married, yet have a discreet bdsm relationship with another, withouth their spouse being aware of it. ?

(in reply to rubyleu)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: being married... - 1/26/2007 2:22:38 PM   
sweetbear61


Posts: 33
Joined: 9/12/2005
Status: offline
Ahem!!

(in reply to MsOpal)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: being married... - 1/26/2007 2:32:39 PM   
sweetbear61


Posts: 33
Joined: 9/12/2005
Status: offline
i am not being holier than you attitude , i was also married for 26 years to a very emotionally abuser... (very vanilla) also,
he also cheated on me with MY sister while i was in the hospital having his son! so i know cheating Hurts! and you know something else ? i learned to cheat from HIM ! i tried through out those 26 years to please him in anyway i could, even brought females for us to play with to him... and HE still cheated! ......lol so i think cheating in just in some people! yes i cheated on Him to to get even so to speak. and He went nuts on me when he found out! cheating hurts all the way around no matter if is in this lifestlye or vanilla. ........or finding that wallet and not turning it in .
sweet

(in reply to mymasterssub69)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: being married... - 1/26/2007 2:34:02 PM   
lateralist1


Posts: 886
Joined: 11/22/2006
Status: offline
I don't think it's anyone else's business what another person does.
Judging someone's character is very different than being judgemental.
Marriage has nothing to do with a relationship it is designer to be a legal contract.
That's all.
And a very outdated one at that.
It tries to financially protect women and children. And often goes overboard.
When some men stopped using it because it didn't serve them to the government introduced the Child Support Agency.
This is not meant to offend anyone who takes their Christian vows very seriously.
It's just that most people in England are not practicing Christians but the link between Church and State is still there.
Surely a person is better trying to make their marriage work on a vanilla level and seeking the extra they need elsewhere rather than destroying it.
Some people have marriage partners they can tell. Others don't. It may be more of a reflection on the other person in the marriage than on the person who is cheating.

(in reply to sweetbear61)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: being married... - 1/26/2007 2:38:37 PM   
domiguy


Posts: 12952
Joined: 5/2/2006
Status: offline
You people are all soooo judgemental!....If it's not consentual then it's awful...Hypocrites!....Nothing warms the soul of Domiguy then to watch the spouse of one of my cheating subbies start to crumble and cry when he finds out what his wife has been doing!!!!It's so funny! When they get those eight by ten glossies with their wife on all fours...Huge butt plug in one end and deep throating yours truly ,,,it's the best!!!..Especially  if you can be there to catch their initial reaction...Truly priceless!  But, it doesn't end there...If there are kids involved it's even "double the fun!"  Nothing says "I love you" to a small child then finding out that there Mom is fucking Domiguy 'cause their "Pop" is such a lame schmuck! (It's even better if I can get to explain to the kids I was doing them a favor...Watching their little faces "light up," as I explain to them  that without me, their mom would have left their useless father years ago.) When they are balling and figuring out which parent to live with...all I can think about is how condescending you people are for not understanding that in the pursuit of pussy everything else is trivial....Assholes!(Domiguy catches breath....just the thought of little kids crying always makes me laugh)

So you closed minded fucks who can't understand the pleasure of ripping apart other peoples lives and families and how inconsequential such things are when it comes to the  pusuit of some good pussy ...Well then, you are worthless and weak!

I mean it's not like there are single woman who are willing to do this kind of shit.  It's just so damn easy to fuck a friend's or a  stranger's wife or his girl...So, why not do it?

Pussies!

out.

D.G.

p.s. Jesus please protect me from your followers.

(in reply to sweetbear61)
Profile   Post #: 38
RE: being married... - 1/26/2007 2:43:47 PM   
bandit25


Posts: 3029
Joined: 6/18/2005
Status: offline
I don't think anyone is judgmental of extra-marital activities as long as all parties agree to it.  Who the fuck cares then?  It's that fatal "need to be discrete" line in the profiles that gets me.

(in reply to Domdecisive)
Profile   Post #: 39
RE: being married... - 1/26/2007 2:47:03 PM   
gandalf0297


Posts: 148
Joined: 8/6/2006
Status: offline
Its cheating.

(in reply to krista)
Profile   Post #: 40
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