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how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom - 12/1/2007 6:42:19 PM

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I have seen posts by someone who talks about ownership of who she calls daddy but also talks about being collared by her fiance? how can someone be owned by more than 1 Master? Wouldnt there be primary ownership by the first with her being "on loan" to a second? it really makes no sense to me that someone could be owned by more than 1. the fact that thye still seek after finding onedoesnt sound like ownership and if permission has to be sought for the second Master than by definition the first Master is the true Master. Am I missing something here?

RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom - 12/1/2007 6:50:45 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19
Am I missing something here?

Just that it's their relationship and if having more than one owner works for them than it's valid - however they work out the ownership. There is more than one dominant couple who shares a submissive or slave after all. If you are curious about how they make it work, ask her about it.

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Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

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(in reply to lusciouslips19)

RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom - 12/1/2007 6:57:02 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

quote:

ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19
Am I missing something here?

Just that it's their relationship and if having more than one owner works for them than it's valid - however they work out the ownership. There is more than one dominant couple who shares a submissive or slave after all. If you are curious about how they make it work, ask her about it.

I have no problem with whatever relationship someone has. I am not judgemental. It just doesnt seem to make sense from a D's perspective. Or maybe its my definition of ownership. How do you share ownership with someone you dont know? Why would one want to share a slave? If you co-own, is that not in some way a relinquishing of part of the ownership?

(in reply to AquaticSub)

RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom - 12/1/2007 6:57:16 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19

I have seen posts by someone who talks about ownership of who she calls daddy but also talks about being collared by her fiance? how can someone be owned by more than 1 Master?

If there's any constant in the overal BDSM scene, it's that the various labels--master, slave, submissive, ownership, et alia--have many, many definitions. In fact, there's almost as many definitions as there are practitioners. If you want to know how she works it out in her head, go ahead and ask her.

I'll admit, I'm not sure how that would work out off the top of my head; maybe a timeshare agreement? :)

(in reply to lusciouslips19)

RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom - 12/1/2007 7:01:54 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: clodivs

quote:

ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19

I have seen posts by someone who talks about ownership of who she calls daddy but also talks about being collared by her fiance? how can someone be owned by more than 1 Master?

If there's any constant in the overal BDSM scene, it's that the various labels--master, slave, submissive, ownership, et alia--have many, many definitions. In fact, there's almost as many definitions as there are practitioners. If you want to know how she works it out in her head, go ahead and ask her.

I'll admit, I'm not sure how that would work out off the top of my head; maybe a timeshare agreement? :)

LOL. exactly. Its not being judgemantal. it just doesnt compute in my brain. Plus wouldnt one have more power than the other, if a choice had to be made? And wouldnt that one be the true Master?

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RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom - 12/1/2007 7:02:55 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19

I have no problem with whatever relationship someone has. I am not judgemental. It just doesnt seem to make sense from a D's perspective. Or maybe its my definition of ownership. How do you share ownership with someone you dont know? Why would one want to share a slave? If you co-own, is that not in some way a relinquishing of part of the ownership?

Why can't you share something? People can share bikes, cars, horses, tables and anything else they own. If they want to share it with someone else, regardless of how well they know them, that is their business. Is it so different from an owner lending or selling their slave's services?

PS. I still say if you have questions you should ask them, not us. They would best know how they work it out.

< Message edited by AquaticSub -- 12/1/2007 7:04:25 PM >

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(in reply to lusciouslips19)

RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom - 12/1/2007 7:05:34 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

quote:

ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19

I have no problem with whatever relationship someone has. I am not judgemental. It just doesnt seem to make sense from a D's perspective. Or maybe its my definition of ownership. How do you share ownership with someone you dont know? Why would one want to share a slave? If you co-own, is that not in some way a relinquishing of part of the ownership?

Why can't you share something? People can share bikes, cars, horses, tables and anything else they own. If they want to share it with someone else, regardless of how well they know them, that is their business. Is it so different from an owner lending or selling their slave's services?

Well with someone you dont know , I guess you could and with partnerships in business you would need a really good contract.

(in reply to AquaticSub)

RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom - 12/1/2007 7:08:24 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19

Well with someone you dont know , I guess you could and with partnerships in business you would need a really good contract.

Basically it comes down to personal preference. I can share anything I own with anyone I want as long as they want to share it with me. As long as it suits everyone involved, I don't see why it wouldn't work differently for d/s.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

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(in reply to lusciouslips19)

RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom - 12/1/2007 7:11:53 PM

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I guess you could look at with an example of parenthood. A um is loved equally by both parents, and they both love the um equally. No one negates the others feelings.

I can see how it would work in this situation too. It wouldn't be my thing, but the worlds a big, funny place!!

< Message edited by MissMagnolia -- 12/1/2007 7:12:27 PM >

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RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom - 12/1/2007 7:12:41 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: AquaticSub

quote:

ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19

Well with someone you dont know , I guess you could and with partnerships in business you would need a really good contract.

Basically it comes down to personal preference. I can share anything I own with anyone I want as long as they want to share it with me. As long as it suits everyone involved, I don't see why it wouldn't work differently for d/s.

I guess what I have trouble with is that I think that if the chips were down in an arguement between 2 Masters and if you were required to choose, there is 1 who would take precedence over the other. So I think this 1 would be the true Master. Even if you own a dog. You may have 2 owners but one is looked at by the dog as the alpha and the one who ultimately is really in charge.

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RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom - 12/1/2007 7:13:40 PM

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It really does come down to what works for them. I know it's difficult to compare people to objects, but people co-own objects all of the time, why not people as well? It's their dynamic and they don't have to explain or defend it. It's okay if we don't understand it.

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RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom - 12/1/2007 7:21:12 PM

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I am not judging and its not about anyone having to defend themselves. It seems to work for them and she seems happy. I think thats great. I just wonder how a sub gets to decide that she gets more than one Master and if this is the case that doesnt seem very submissive but rather permissive. No I dont understand and I'm trying to wrap my head around it. But this in no way is meant as a criticism of anyones life. Lord knows, I dont make sense either. matter of fact a master friend ccalled me a "confusing wonder".

So you are right, we dont have to understand other peoples dynamic. just trying to figure out if other people think that this set up is really D's. I know in the long run it doesntmatter. This is something i have been wondering about and thats it.

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RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom - 12/1/2007 7:31:17 PM

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There was a sub who used to post here named "mavis", and if I were you I would look up her posts in the archives. She had what she referred to as a "husDom" and her master. They both dominated her... and she wrote extensively about how this worked for them.

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(in reply to lusciouslips19)

RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom - 12/1/2007 7:32:15 PM

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That's an easy one. If a Dom can own several subs, then those subs can be owned by several Doms. Life is a two way street.

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(in reply to lusciouslips19)

RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom - 12/1/2007 7:33:25 PM

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Timeshare.

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RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom - 12/1/2007 7:35:17 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: lusciouslips19

I am not judging and its not about anyone having to defend themselves. It seems to work for them and she seems happy. I think thats great. I just wonder how a sub gets to decide that she gets more than one Master and if this is the case that doesnt seem very submissive but rather permissive.

That seems like something you would decide before you were owned. I decided that I am not interested in any primary relationship that does have the pontential for a marriage and 2.5 kids because that is what I want. If at any time Valyraen decides that our relationship does not have the potential for that anymore, the relationship is simply over. It doesn't matter that he owns me, his owning me - liking owning a dog or any other animal - has conditions. Mine are simply more complicated and I do not have to rely on others to remove me from a bad situation.

quote:

No I dont understand and I'm trying to wrap my head around it. But this in no way is meant as a criticism of anyones life. Lord knows, I dont make sense either. matter of fact a master friend ccalled me a "confusing wonder".

I don't understand a lot of relationships on here. I don't understand a lot of relationships off the boards. I don't understand my two asexual friends, no matter how hard I tried. In the end, it really doesn't matter if I understand them or not. It just matters that everyone

quote:

So you are right, we dont have to understand other peoples dynamic. just trying to figure out if other people think that this set up is really D's. I know in the long run it doesntmatter. This is something i have been wondering about and thats it.

Yes, I think this is a real and twue dynamic.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to lusciouslips19)

RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom - 12/1/2007 8:02:44 PM

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(in reply to lusciouslips19)

RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom - 12/1/2007 8:04:43 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: farglebargle

Timeshare.

that makes me think of that South Park episode

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RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom - 12/2/2007 1:22:00 AM

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Different roles. There may be many reasons why the sub you mentioin could have both. Indeed her Daddy may have instructed her to go and find a Master... after all its a Daddy's job to take care of his daughter. One such reason could be distance, another could be health, another could be age. Not saying it is her situation, but if the Daddy is twice her age or has failing health would he not want to know she is going to be cared for upon his passing? Wouldn't he want to have a say in who was going to take care of her. Doesn't every father wish they could choose their daughter's husband?

As for the sub choosing, who says she gets to choose. If both Doms are in close contact, they can co-ordinate her time and efforts between them without her having a single word to say about it.

As I said these may not be her circumstances at all, but its one of many possible explanations and situations.

(in reply to lusciouslips19)

RE: how can a sub be owned by more than 1 Dom - 12/2/2007 1:29:05 AM

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greetings lusciouslips19,

if i'm not mistaken, sambamanslilgirl has both a daddy and a fiance who is her dom...you might want to message her to ask her if you're curious. she seems to be a pretty cool chick, i'm sure she wouldn't mind answering questions.

personally, what works for them works for them. :) i know that it's possible for me to be in love with two people at the same time, so i can imagine being owned by two people at the same time...but the possibility of finding someone who fits into our dynamic and is comfortable co-dominating with my master is probably very small, because it'd have to be a pretty much perfect fit for both of us, and we're happy with the way things are now. we are poly, but our relationships with others are not usually d/s based (although i'm definitely willing to bottom or serve on occasion). we have talked about me possibly getting into a more long-term commitment with someone else, but it's likely that that person would not have ownership of me.

respectfully,
annabelle.

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