Love and M/s (Full Version)

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wouldlike2 -> Love and M/s (6/12/2006 11:26:43 AM)

hello to A/all..

i do ask myself in a M/s relation does the fact of Love apply an important fact for Y/you?
is it necessary?

i do ask cause often when reading profiles, Master - Doms talking about their sub/ slaves they mention the fact of cherish, value, treasure but often Love is not mentioned and i do ask is Love something may will be avoided cause Love is a feeling and can't be controled?

if Love does exist in a M/s relation - does it mean when problems occur Y/you work on them?
or is more like thats a proberty and if this slave does not "work" well I as Master do exchange, release - sale?

thanks a lot A/all for Your answers

pet



lisa1978 -> RE: Love and M/s (6/12/2006 11:52:03 AM)

M/s is like every other relationship. Does love need to be there on both sides when starting out or if you are not looking for a long-term relationship? No If you are in a long-term M/s relationship than love is an important component.

Some will say it is not and you will get different definitions of what you mean by love and whether it only exisit if both acknowledge the feeling but to live and share your life with someone, to go through the ups and downs and for me to be able to personally serve under such a powerful dynamic in years and not months I would have to feel I am loved. Maybe not in a pure romantic sense, maybe not verbally ackowledged but loved in some serious sense by my owner would be important. Therefore I think Masters at the least have to through their actions show that type of dedication and hopefully but not a must say it with words.

I do think it is possible for a M/s to be long-term and for a Master not to love in some sense but I seriously doubt the slave could have a satisfying relationshp and give over what they need to give over as well as have their emotional needs fulfilled. It would raise a red flag to me if a potential Master spoke about not loving a slave of theirs as a component of M/s.






LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Love and M/s (6/12/2006 12:59:31 PM)

http://www.collarchat.com/m_282567/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#282615
submissive/slave romantic love

http://www.collarchat.com/m_269031/mpage_1/key_love%252Csubmission/tm.htm#269120
Falling in love with Mistress

http://www.collarchat.com/m_248492/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#248492
true love in a relationship

http://www.collarchat.com/m_236486/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#236486
balancing commitment and love

http://www.collarchat.com/m_199915/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#199915
love in bdsm

http://www.collarchat.com/m_166085/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#166085
love and D/s

http://www.collarchat.com/m_65043/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#65043
love and bdsm (the unfettered heart)

http://www.collarchat.com/m_150281/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#150281
Is it normal to fall in love with your dom during training?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_125880/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#125880
not allowed to love him, what do I do?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_119832/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#119832
being owned or being loved

http://www.collarchat.com/m_97124/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#97124
subs/masochists and love

http://www.collarchat.com/m_31285/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#31285
can love get in the way?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_14998/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#14998
love in d/s

http://www.collarchat.com/m_2491/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#2491
is love important in a relationship?



akisha -> RE: Love and M/s (6/12/2006 1:43:24 PM)

Is not valuing and cherishing someone loving them?

Personally I don't think you need to love in a M/s relationship but you definately need to respect and care for someone you are with. Be it a 24/7 TPE relationship or a causual play relationship. Then again I can't see being intimate with someone i have no feelings for. Even for a non-sexual scene you have to atleast have a sense of trust and maybe friendship there. Atleast I would.

Then again I have issues with the word love. What exactly does it mean? I care for different people on diffrent levels. Those i care about on a deeper level i'll do just about anything for. I guess that would be considered love but then again it might not. Who can say.



Kinkypupper -> RE: Love and M/s (6/12/2006 2:16:24 PM)

YES  it was not expected, nor was it on the "list"
On the "list" tho was a emotional bonding. it just happened in our case to be a lot stronger then just that .



Estring -> RE: Love and M/s (6/12/2006 2:25:25 PM)

Speaking for myself, I do love my slave/wife. I find through experience that I prefer it that way. I have tried M/s relationships where I didn't love the slave, looking at them more as just possesions. But I found that I couldn't devote enough to the relationship because I didn't really care much about the slave.



mastersayed -> RE: Love and M/s (6/12/2006 3:57:07 PM)

love is key in an long term relationship. most masters love their slaves dearly (I know I do and I constantly tell her that) but others who claim they dont probably just have too much pride to admit it. why would you want to be with someone for a long time if you didnt love them?



juliaoceania -> RE: Love and M/s (6/12/2006 4:08:50 PM)

I suppose there are many successful M/s relationships where love is not desired on either part. To me it would seem counter intuitive that a Master would not at least deeply care for their sub/slave. So much interaction between the parties has to exist for there to be an ongoing , longterm situation that I cannot imagine that a dom could put that much energy into someone they did not care for...

But like I said, I am certain that longterm M/s exists without love.. it would not be a longterm situation I would want to be a part of, but if it fills the needs of others then it does.



Sab -> RE: Love and M/s (6/12/2006 4:20:45 PM)

Yes - I am completely in love with my sub, I will get her to reply after this. :) 



sabswife -> RE: Love and M/s (6/12/2006 4:22:50 PM)

yes, i am totally in love wth my Dom/Husband :)



angelface183 -> RE: Love and M/s (6/12/2006 4:33:43 PM)

Fortunately, I am in love with my Master and He is in love with me.  It just makes everything else so much sweeter.  Before I met SacredDom I had stated on my profile that I was looking for a long term life partner and that love was a necessity.  To quote an email that He sent me before we met, "I agree with you about the love aspect.  To me, Dominance and submission is the deepest, most spiritual, most beautiful expression that two lovers can share.  When done right.  And part of that means that both partners deeply care for/love each other." 



amayos -> RE: Love and M/s (6/12/2006 5:26:25 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: wouldlike2

i do ask myself in a M/s relation does the fact of Love apply an important fact for Y/you?
is it necessary?

i do ask cause often when reading profiles, Master - Doms talking about their sub/ slaves they mention the fact of cherish, value, treasure but often Love is not mentioned and i do ask is Love something may will be avoided cause Love is a feeling and can't be controled?

if Love does exist in a M/s relation - does it mean when problems occur Y/you work on them?
or is more like thats a proberty and if this slave does not "work" well I as Master do exchange, release - sale?


Love can of course exist between Owner and slave. Is it a rule that it must? Certainly not. Understanding the nature of slavery, a select few have offered their love to me unrequited, knowing it is not their right or place to seek it in return, though they may desire so. It is that selfless and unbreakable adoration I find to be most sweet and truthful in one who submits by will alone. Its essence is a rare bird, and one I gladly invite in my company.

When mutual love exists between Owner and slave, it is my opinion that such sentiments should not undermine the authority or structure between them. Love or do not love, but remember who is Master and who is slave, who is servant and who is served.



xxmstrchasxx -> RE: Love and M/s (6/12/2006 5:42:46 PM)

I have been together with my sub for 8 years and we love each other.

I have played with other subs where love wasn't there.



feastie -> RE: Love and M/s (6/12/2006 6:07:12 PM)

There are those that post that slaves are mere possessions and undeserving of anything other than what the Master allows them.

I always have to sigh and shake my head at that point.  It's a sad statement, I think, to expect someone to live without love.
Love is important. It, to me...is necessary.  I have no interest in giving myself completely to someone I do not love, or who does not love me.  Been there, done that and I got the lousy t-shirt.  I'm willing to sell it, if anyone wants to buy it.



wouldlike2 -> RE: Love and M/s (6/13/2006 12:45:39 AM)

thanks a lot for all Y/ your answers so far - it does give me a clue and a direction and thanks LuckyAlbatross for the posted links - smile -
didn't know this topic was mentioned so often....

pet



BeingChewsie -> RE: Love and M/s (6/13/2006 8:03:06 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: mastersayed

love is key in an long term relationship. most masters love their slaves dearly (I know I do and I constantly tell her that) but others who claim they dont probably just have too much pride to admit it. why would you want to be with someone for a long time if you didnt love them?


Because they are useful. I have been in my owner's service over 6 years and he does not -love- me. It is not a pride thing, he doesn't. We have certainly talked about it. I love him with such intensity, he is my world. He cares for me, he has a deep emotional bond with me as property but it is not love. I struggled with this for a long time, but in the end, being his was far more important than him loving me in return.



Lashra -> RE: Love and M/s (6/13/2006 8:49:21 AM)

I love my sub and he loves me, we are also best friends. In our relationship it works wonderfully. However love is not a vital component in many relationships and in some not desired. I have heard it said it is much harder to own a slave that the owner loves then not. I would imagine it has something to do with the discipline aspect. I know with my sub he gets away with alot more because I love him then if I didn't. He's a mischevious minx, but thats part of what I adore about him. [:D]
Regardless each person needs to decide for themselves if love needs to be part of the relationship and if it does go out there and find what it is you seek.

~Lashra



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