RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? (Full Version)

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AMaster -> RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? (6/10/2008 10:06:41 AM)

Maybe not love, but there must e some kind of connection.



adorability -> RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? (6/10/2008 10:14:18 AM)

Love is essential to my submission.  For me, the act of submission is tied into my emotions- and without love, it's shallow and empty.  I have actually found that submitting without love is detrimental to who I am, and negatively impacts my self-esteem- so I steer clear of those sorts of encounters. 



softness -> RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? (6/10/2008 10:21:34 AM)

well it depends very much on the type of submission

I would not enter into slavery with a Man I didn't love, and I couldn't stop myself from loving a Man who controlled me that intimately. Giving up the right to be right, the control of what I eat and when I sleep, what I wear, my job, my finances, my health, even my country of residence ...  why the hell would I do all that if I didn;t love them?

The type of submission that goes hand in hand with casual play, or casual relationships .... hell .. I dont even need all that much respect for them to be submissive then .. or emotion ... with "Toy Tops" as they have been recently labelled, I am not doing it for them, I am doing it very much for me, I am using them for my own needs - however much it might look different from the outside.



willowspirit -> RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? (6/10/2008 10:35:02 AM)

We submit all the time to people and things we don't love. Obeying laws, teachers, bosses... However giving SomeOne my  "complete submission" is a Huge Big deal!! If SomeOne wants that it will take time, trust and love. Completeness means my emotions too.
One other factor. I noticed that over time, even transient submitting events develop into a love on my side. Sometimes I don't want to LOVE a specific person... so I need to avoid submitting --- It's like I don't want to get trapped into something I really never wanted to happen in the first place. But then again, people have to leave room in their lives for pleasant surprizes !



Puppy4goodHome -> RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? (6/10/2008 10:43:27 AM)

it is trust respect and with that comes love in some cases



corsetgirl -> RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? (6/10/2008 2:23:20 PM)

I want it all, love, romance, passion and submission.  I have submitted before to those who I was not in love with them and I also felt very empty.  Of course, I also want trust and communication because I believe without those components, there is no relationship.



kallisto -> RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? (6/10/2008 2:52:18 PM)

I can and have submitted without there being love, but there was trust, respect, honesty, and a mutual attraction to want the D/s relationship.   Nothing is more fulfilling or satisfying than to be able to submit to your Dom when there is love.   It is the ultimate for me.  



SaraZeal -> RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? (6/10/2008 3:18:39 PM)

I seek love primarily and a long term relationship, being submissive within the relationship comes after to me. I'm not looking to play a little. I want more. I can be submissive without love, but I won't come back if there is no love. I'm submissive only to those who earn my trust and respect.



HizBabyGirl -> RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? (6/10/2008 3:54:36 PM)

I have come to the same conclusion that you have apparently. Without love and commitment it is too hollow for my taste. One cannot give of themselves to any great degree in a shallow relationship, for one thing it is not safe. The more commitment and connection there is, the deeper the level of play and the deeper the emotional growth and bond between the two.

Sooooo, I'm with you!



LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? (6/10/2008 4:07:24 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessTeaze
So how do you feel about this, and what's importent
for you  ?

Love is not a necessary component of submission and domination for me.
 
Love is a necessary component of my vanilla relationship with my partner.
\

http://www.collarchat.com/m_651231/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#651253
What's love got to do with it?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_632033/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#632105
Loving your property

http://www.collarchat.com/m_609494/mpage_2/key_love/tm.htm#609934
Ownership and Love

http://www.collarchat.com/m_545462/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#545482
What does love got to do with it?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_538921/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#538965
The Loving Dom

http://www.collarchat.com/m_499831/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#499881
Don't fall in love with your dom

http://www.collarchat.com/m_477568/mpage_3/key_love/tm.htm#484997
How common is it to fall in love with a submissive or dominant?

http://www.collarchat.com/tm.asp?m=423736&mpage=1&key=love&#423879
Love and Ms

http://www.collarchat.com/m_282567/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#282615
submissive/slave romantic love

http://www.collarchat.com/m_269031/mpage_1/key_love%252Csubmission/tm.htm#269120
Falling in love with Mistress

http://www.collarchat.com/m_248492/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#248492
true love in a relationship

http://www.collarchat.com/m_236486/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#236486
balancing commitment and love

http://www.collarchat.com/m_199915/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#199915
love in bdsm

http://www.collarchat.com/m_166085/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#166085
love and D/s

http://www.collarchat.com/m_65043/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#65043
love and bdsm (the unfettered heart)

http://www.collarchat.com/m_150281/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#150281
Is it normal to fall in love with your dom during training?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_125880/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#125880
not allowed to love him, what do I do?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_119832/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#119832
being owned or being loved

http://www.collarchat.com/m_97124/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#97124
subs/masochists and love

http://www.collarchat.com/m_31285/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#31285
can love get in the way?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_14998/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#14998
love in d/s

http://www.collarchat.com/m_2491/mpage_1/key_love/tm.htm#2491
is love important in a relationship





khantengri -> RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? (6/10/2008 5:14:16 PM)

For me dominance is exercising an essential aspect of myself, and I don't believe that I need love in order to get satisfactory fulfillment.

However, my sub has no submissive inclinations without extreme love and trust.



lubegirl -> RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? (6/10/2008 5:43:35 PM)

ABSOLUTELY



DiurnalVampire -> RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? (6/10/2008 5:51:13 PM)

Love is necessary for my boys, but ROMANTIC love is not necessarily. Angel loves me, but not romantically. Fox loves me romanticaly. They both submit fully and happily.

DV



lubegirl -> RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? (6/10/2008 6:01:52 PM)

i have learned there is no other relationship that offers me any level of satisfaction, so i don't continue to date a Dom if it becomes apparent W/we have no future together.
 
pinksugarsub

I have only loved one MASTER and if I felt that he only wanted me to exercise HIS power over me it would be an ending to the magic I feel inside.
So I understand and agree with what you are saying. In order for me to be collared and share so many intimate details of my private life as I SERVE, PLEASE and OBEY  there must be genuine love.

I only love ONE MANS collar, but have and will continue to be a submissive fucktoy to as many men as DADDY asks me to spread my whore legs to.

lubegirl




katiekajira -> RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? (6/10/2008 6:16:06 PM)

Greetings A/all,

For this girl personally, love has got quite alot to do with it.  she's found that love is what seems to be one of the biggest chains binding her to an Owner, because it would be her love that drove her to want to please them with every ounce of heart and soul. 

If there was no love to be found within her heart for One, then her submission would be out of pure respect and trust maybe, but when there is love involved the entire dynamics of the relationship changes, it's a whole new level, because if there is no love she finds she can detach herself enough to walk away if the circumstances should warrent such, (such as if things become unstab le to the point of being unsafe),.....when there is love, her heart feels so firmly attached to that One that even if she wanted to, she could not do anything but make their tiniest whim her highest priority, because her heart would simply have to follow. 

respectfully,
katie



thespiritedsub -> RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? (6/10/2008 6:17:04 PM)

Love must be present for me to submit. I am nuturally distrustful of society in general. For me to put my trust in someone, to believe that they know what is best for me, I must also believe that they have something personally invested in me.



chickpea -> RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? (6/10/2008 6:27:44 PM)

When i submit, i give 200%.  so it must about love, or have the potential.  Else, it's just a distraction and a waste of time.  Only in rare cases will i submit without love involved...like demonstrations or where learning something new technically. 



sambamanslilgirl -> RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? (6/10/2008 6:54:08 PM)

love is an ingredient for my relationship with Daddy however it's not the main one in my submission to Him.  having His trust, compassion, guidance and loving dominance is what helped me to submit.



MasterFireMaam -> RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? (6/10/2008 7:53:32 PM)

Define love.

Romantic love? No, I don't think it's integral to the success of a happy and fulfilling Ms relationship. Other kinds of love, like adoraton and a general friendliness and even affection? Most need these to some degree or another.

Master Fire



califsue -> RE: Is love an importent ingredient in order to submit? (6/10/2008 8:18:51 PM)

In the beginning love was not an important ingredient and in fact I went out of my way to only play with people and made it clear I did not want a relationship. For me, I only wanted to physical aspect of play and did not want any emotional/mental connection. If you play primarily with one person over time I do believe you can develop a mental/emotional connection which enhances the play time. 
 
Fast forward a couple years, and now I am ready for and do have a M/s dynamic relationship that involves love though it is slow moving because when we first met I knew it could be more and called it off although we did keep in touch by email.
 
heather



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