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What is humiliation exactly? - 4/26/2007 11:17:23 AM

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I have been trying to figure out exactly what humiliation is to this community. I think I would be interested in it but I don't quite know what it is, I think I might know. Can anyone give me some insight?

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RE: What is humiliation exactly? - 4/26/2007 11:21:20 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: zindyslave
I have been trying to figure out exactly what humiliation is to this community. I think I would be interested in it but I don't quite know what it is, I think I might know. Can anyone give me some insight?

For me it is intentionally humbling (lower in rank) someone before another.

http://www.collarchat.com/m_557686/mpage_1/key_humiliation/tm.htm#557707
Embarassment vs humiliation

http://www.collarchat.com/m_354018/mpage_1/key_humiliation/tm.htm#354196
humiliation???

http://www.collarchat.com/m_412944/mpage_1/key_humiliation/tm.htm#413037
what is good humiliation to you?

http://www.collarchat.com/m_426015/mpage_1/key_humiliation/tm.htm#426025
humiliation vs degradation

http://www.collarchat.com/m_489256/mpage_1/key_humiliation/tm.htm#489324
humiliation and vulnerability

http://www.collarchat.com/m_310209/mpage_1/key_humiliation/tm.htm#310223
Humiliation- verbal and physical

http://www.collarchat.com/m_266448/mpage_1/key_humiliation/tm.htm#266532
humiliation ideas

Slaves on display via webcam?

Fat Cow? Verbal humiliation (rehashed)

Humiliation and Degradation

Erotic Humiliation

Female Humiliation- in the scene

Asking for humiliation

Favorite Forms of humiliation

Humiliation

Humliation Play

Favorite forms of humiliation

Erotic Humiliation and Objectification

Why such problems with humiliation?

Fun ideas for humiliation

Humiliation (2)

Verbal Humiliation

Help with humiliation please!

Your thoughts on humiliation please

Questions about humiliation

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RE: What is humiliation exactly? - 4/26/2007 11:38:40 AM

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hey LuckyAlbatross I'm curious. is there any topic that you can't post a a list of threads longer than my arm about it? xD

I don't know a lot about humiliation but for me is making a person feel he (or she) is less than others.

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RE: What is humiliation exactly? - 4/26/2007 11:42:45 AM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: WilliamWizer
hey LuckyAlbatross I'm curious. is there any topic that you can't post a a list of threads longer than my arm about it? xD

Absolutely :)

quote:

I don't know a lot about humiliation but for me is making a person feel he (or she) is less than others.

That's how most people define "degradation"

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RE: What is humiliation exactly? - 4/26/2007 11:43:47 AM

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Is degradation the same as humilation?

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RE: What is humiliation exactly? - 4/26/2007 11:58:47 AM

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no, humiliation and degradation are not the same, although i notice some use the terms interchangeably. an easy way to remember the difference is to look at the words themselves...when one is humiliated one is forcibly humbled....when one is degraded one is forcibly "down" graded...put down, made to be less.

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RE: What is humiliation exactly? - 4/26/2007 12:04:57 PM

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Okay thank you daddysprop247 for clarifying that one for me. I guess what I thought was humiliation meant the same as what you defined degradation as. I am trying to understand in simple terms what humilation is for a while I thought humilation was the same as embarrassment is that even in the right ball park?

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RE: What is humiliation exactly? - 4/26/2007 12:11:06 PM

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In my mind...and apparently Daniel Websters , humiliation is synonmous with degradation.

hu·mil·i·a·tion

/hyuˌmɪl

iˈeɪ

ʃən or, often, yu-/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[hyoo-mil-ee-ey-shuh

n or, often, yoo-] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation
–noun

1.
an act or instance of humiliating or being humiliated.

2.
the state or feeling of being humiliated; mortification.

[Origin: 1350–1400; ME < LL humiliātiōn- (s. of humiliātiō). See humiliate, -ion

]

—Synonyms 2. degradation, dishonor. See shame.

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RE: What is humiliation exactly? - 4/26/2007 12:31:06 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: zindyslave
I am trying to understand in simple terms what humilation is for a while I thought humilation was the same as embarrassment is that even in the right ball park?

For some it is.

For me embarassment is simply feeling awkward in some situation. Humiliation is an intentionally directed headspace. There are some other good threads discussing how people view the difference.

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RE: What is humiliation exactly? - 4/26/2007 12:46:51 PM

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Thank you all for your replies it really helps.

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RE: What is humiliation exactly? - 4/26/2007 3:04:21 PM

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Humiliation and degredation are very similar. I would distinguish them though - humiliation is reminding someone of her (low) station, degredation implies that one started at a relatively high station and is being lowered.

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RE: What is humiliation exactly? - 4/26/2007 3:22:34 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Raphael

Humiliation and degredation are very similar. I would distinguish them though - humiliation is reminding someone of her (low) station, degredation implies that one started at a relatively high station and is being lowered.

that's a good way of putting it. when my Master humiliates me, it is to remind me of my place. perhaps i started to become too comfortable and secure, overly accustomed to kind treatment, etc. a good dose of humiliation will cure that.
when he degrades me otoh, he is reducing me to yet a lower place...for instance, when he trained me to be a toilet slut, in our union that qualified as degradation. previously, i was "too good" to be used as a toilet...now, when he wants, i am the toilet.

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RE: What is humiliation exactly? - 4/26/2007 3:55:40 PM

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I once met a d/s couple. They believed that if he humiliated her she would grow stronger and be able to cope better with vanilla humiliation.
I met a grandfather the other day who was doing the same for his grand daughter although perhaps he hadn't thought it through in the same way.
He was very shy as a young man and knew that it has stopped him from approaching the women he had wanted to.
People try to humiliate me all the time because I am open about who I am. They only succeed if I let them. What they think of me is their problem. It's not mine unless I allow it to become so. You have to be tough to survive this life. But you don't have to lower your standards of behaviour. When I lose my cool the other person wins. That's what lots of male subs want. I am a woman. I want to be able to care about my submissive BDSM partner. If I don't care it's the end of the relationship. D/s is a very complex psychological balancing act. And like most complex ideas words are not really a good enough communication tool. However they are all we have. I have never believed that reading about some 'expert's' views is enough to form your own opinions. And any Dom/me who thinks that they 'know' what a sub needs unless they have been together a very long time really wants their head looking. The only safe way to indulge my passion for BDSM is within a loving D/s relationship. I won't do it in any other way. I've had people beg me. I've been offered a lot of money. To play at this humiliates me. I'm worth more than that. So for me the why you do something is far more important than what you do.

(in reply to Raphael)

RE: What is humiliation exactly? - 4/26/2007 4:41:34 PM

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Insults Put downs belittling by words

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RE: What is humiliation exactly? - 4/26/2007 4:41:54 PM

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I don't know if I would equate humiliation with humbling.

Examples I could use are:

Humiliation:

Master and I were with a group of people (vanilla people), we were talking about a subject I was getting very passionate about. Master said in front of everyone "thats enough Jali". I felt humiliated in front of these people I didn't feel humbled at all..just plain humiliated. Sure I was put in my place but it was through being humiliated not humbled.

Humbled:

When I see someone acting with more integrity than I have, or more self-control or with some other quality that I have yet to get a full grip on I really do feel humbled.

To me humiliation and feeling humbled are very different things.

As far as degredation goes:

I don't think I have ever felt degredated..and I dont think anyone could possibly make me feel degredated. I feel too good about myself inside for anyone to every be able to take me down that road, no matter what they did or said to me.

< Message edited by slavejali -- 4/26/2007 4:42:29 PM >

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RE: What is humiliation exactly? - 4/26/2007 6:26:10 PM

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Humiliation is often a word that refers to mental play in general. Humiliation is different things to different people. It usually means deliberately causing unpleasant feelings in the bottom, typically by poking at some insecurity. This can range all the way from mild "erotic embarrassment" and light mockery of qualities that don't really bother the person being humiliated to persuading someone that he or she is what he or she loathes or fears most. Most bottoms develop an idea of what concepts or traits are effective for them for humiliation play (e.g. what makes them feel ashamed/sad/uneasy/disgusted), and what of those concepts or traits are desirable or "fair game". Many people have a set of insecurities that are mildly exciting, and a set of insecurities that are emotionally fraught but okay to play with, and yet another set of insecurities that aren't okay to play with.

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RE: What is humiliation exactly? - 4/26/2007 8:42:52 PM

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Raphael

Humiliation and degredation are very similar. I would distinguish them though - humiliation is reminding someone of her (low) station, degredation implies that one started at a relatively high station and is being lowered.

I find that interesting as Master often reminds me of my place (station) however I do not feel (and I don't think He does either) that it is "low" and I certainly don't feel humiliated when He does so. As a matter of fact, it makes me feel very good to know my place. It fills me with a sense of security, belonging and warmth.

I really think it is more subjective than anything. To one person, being asked/made to crawl would be humiliating and degrading while to someone else, it just seems like a natural action and they feel great pleasure doing it.

And still yet, the intentions and demeanor of the Person doing the asking/ordering have to do with it as well. For example, when Master calls me His slut, it is a very endearing and loving term. It takes on a whole different meaning coming from a jealous/angry person.

Sincerely,
minxy

(in reply to Raphael)

RE: What is humiliation exactly? - 4/26/2007 9:58:15 PM

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Thanks for all the responses it has helped me understand it more.

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